All-American Girl (17 page)

“We can endure neither our vices nor the remedies for them.”
~Titus Livius

S
AMANTHA
W
AS
S
URPRISED
when she awoke that Sunday, the sun brightly shining through the curtains, the clock showing eight a.m., yet there wasn’t a sound coming from downstairs. Had Lance changed his mind after thinking over their interaction the night before? She was still tingling from it, and the cold shower hadn’t helped. The restless night made it worse, and when she had finally drifted off to sleep, all she’d dreamed about was him.

If Cole had lied about what Lance said all those years ago, then Samantha knew she’d run for no good reason. But the decision she’d made had molded her into the person she was today, and while she might not be perfect, there had been times when she’d been happy.

She showered, dressed, and checked her appearance in the mirror before heading downstairs. Standard jeans and T-shirt, hair in a ponytail. Basic. Simple. Just how she liked it.

As she padded her way to the kitchen, she told herself she was going to discover the truth about the past from Cole himself. She’d missed out on something she’d desperately wanted and wondered if she could have it now.

But she wasn’t good with men, so what would be the point? She’d be madly in love with him and Jax, only to have her heart crushed somewhere down the road. Even if Lance did desire her, it wasn’t enough. His love wouldn’t even be enough; it never would. She couldn’t give him what he would need.

Samantha walked into the living room and found her phone on the floor behind the couch. She examined it. It looked okay. She’d missed a call from her attorney, so she knew Ryan had wanted something. She made a mental note to call her attorney back, but she wasn’t in a hurry. Ryan would only irritate her by asking for more money or property. That was the least of her worries, so she’d put him on the backburner. Permanently.

Samantha made her way to the kitchen and froze outside the doorway. Well, at least where the kitchen had been. The countertops were gone, along with a few of the cabinets. The center island she’d been sprawled out on the night before had vanished. Her eyes darted around the room, looking for anything familiar. Nothing. She wasn’t going to get her morning coffee anytime soon, and that pricked her with irritation.

Lance.

He’d been there, torn up the kitchen without waking her, and then he’d left. That left her annoyed and caffeine-deprived. And where the hell was Jenny? She was MIA, too. Grumbling under her breath, Samantha slipped on her shoes. The sooner she had her morning coffee, the sooner she’d be ready to face the day. And Lance.

“Hey, Gram.” Samantha slipped into Dorothy’s room and rushed over for a hug. Gram was sitting in a plush chair near the window. “How are you?”

“Oh, wonderful, dear. Just wonderful.”

Gram’s cheeks were pink, her eyes sparkling brightly in the morning sun. Her skin glowed. She looked happy and healthy and nothing like the grandmother Samantha had seen barely a week before. It made Samantha’s own inner light flick on and shine brightly. Nothing made her happier than seeing her grandmother recover.

“I talked with the doctor again this morning. They think you should get a medal for all your progress. It won’t be long now before you get to come home.”

Gram patted her on the arm. “You see? Ol’ Gram still has some spark left in her.”

Samantha laughed. “Yes. Hey, I was thinking about something. What do you think of me coming by and helping with the physical therapy sessions?”

“Why, dear?”

“Because I want to be here for you, like I always should’ve been.” A burn started at the back of her throat. “I think I can help you.”

Gram’s eyes lit up. “That would be wonderful.”

“Really?”

“Yes, honey. I need some uplifting conversation during those boring sessions.” She flashed a grin that made Samantha’s heart swell. “Besides, why do I get the feeling the visits will be helping you just as much as they’ll help me?”

Samantha sighed. Gram was a smart woman. Samantha had been thinking about getting more involved with the therapy for a few days, and seeing Cole in such bad shape drove the point home when she realized she could only help those who wanted to help themselves. Just like Gram said, Samantha needed the visits to help her, too. To keep her focused on why she was here, and to keep her head above water where Lance was concerned. Just to keep everything…level. Gram was good at helping Samantha keep a balance, which she needed now more than ever.

“Great!” Happy tears pooled at the corner of Samantha’s eyes. Spending this time with Gram would help sort out everything. “Your next session is tomorrow morning, right?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll be here.”

Gram winked at her. “I’ll be waiting.”

Samantha flung open the front door and was surprised to see Lance and Jenny sitting in the living room. Jenny was laughing, still dressed in sweats with her hair in a bun from the night before. Lance looked devilish as always, his tight shirt showing off his muscles, his jeans wrapped nicely around his strong thighs.

A pastry box sat on the coffee table, along with three cups of what Samantha hoped was coffee. She’d already gotten some on the way to see Gram, but she suddenly had the urge for more. She tugged at the bottom of her shirt, and finally settled with jamming her hands in her pockets.

“Morning,” Jenny said when she saw Samantha standing in the doorway. “Where’ve you been?”

“Oh…I went to visit Gram. And I needed coffee.”

Lance’s dark eyes found their way to Samantha’s face, and she couldn’t suppress the shiver.

“Morning, Sam.”

His words were so simple, yet so powerful. She recalled his body wrapped around hers and the craving he’d unleashed, the burning need that had swallowed her. She suddenly didn’t know if she could have a casual conversation with him. Hell, yes, she could. She
could
and she
would
. At one time she’d been the master of creating emotions in her characters, so she would have to create some emotions of her own. Ones that didn’t involve her love for Lance. She had no choice but to pretend; it was the only way her heart would survive until she went back to New York.

“What do you think?” Lance asked.

“What?”

“The kitchen. What do you think about the kitchen?”

“Oh…it…well. I don’t know. I can’t really picture it. How did you manage to do all this work without making a sound?”

He flashed a wicked smile in her direction. “The bathroom dilemma was different. Someone had triple reinforced the cabinet and sink to the wall. Those bolts were a pain to get out. But the kitchen was easy. And—” he raised his eyebrow a fraction “—because I’m good.”

If Samantha hadn’t had a firm grip on the doorknob, she might have fallen to the floor. He
was
good. He’d been amazing when he was younger, and she could only imagine his skills had improved over time. She’d had a taste of just how good the night before. Chiding herself, she moved into the living room and took a seat.

“So, what’s in the box?” Samantha asked.

Lance pushed it toward her. “Pastries from Candice’s diner.” He moved next to her and flipped open the lid. “She’s trying her hand at baking.”

Samantha inched her body farther from Lance’s so she couldn’t feel his heat or smell him. When she took a breath, she realized it was too late. His exotic scent was back, making her mouth water. “No thanks. I already got my java. Good thing, too, otherwise I get grumpy.”

Jenny barked a laugh. “No kidding. I knew you couldn’t live without your coffee, so I forced Lance to take me into town to get something. I didn’t want to deal with a grumpy Samantha on a Sunday morning. I knew the mess in the kitchen would stress you out enough. I guess you took care of it when you went to see Dorothy, though. I’ll take a pastry, Lance. I’m starved.” She reached into the box and pulled out a huge, gooey concoction that looked like a cross between an over-sized cinnamon roll and an apple danish, not to mention delicious and very bad for you.

“You’re going to need a serious treadmill workout after that thing,” Samantha said as she grabbed the cup of coffee. Maybe the extra caffeine would settle her stretched nerves.

“Nonsense,” Jenny replied with a wink. “Sometimes it’s good to indulge your inner desires.”

Samantha stole a glance at Lance, who was smiling, too. She took a long drink of coffee. “And sometimes it’s good to keep things buried where they belong. Less work in the long run that way,” she said solemnly.

Lance cleared his throat and picked up a pastry from the box. He examined it before taking a big bite. The muscles in his jaw flexed and his tongue darted out to catch some icing. Samantha tried not to envision his tongue on her skin the night before. After swallowing, he said, “I agree with Jenny. Life is hard work, no sense in keeping your inner needs hidden.”

Samantha rose, clutching her coffee tightly. “No, thank you. I’ll keep my
inner needs
as tucked away as I want.”

“What’s wrong?” Jenny asked.

“Nothing. I didn’t sleep well last night and I’ve got a lot to do today. I’m just stressed, I guess.”

Lance finished the last of his pastry and stood, his unsettling stare focused on her. “I’ll try to stay out of your way then. And I’ll make sure I keep quiet, like I did for you this morning.”

Samantha sighed. “I’m sorry. Thank you for what you’re doing.”

Jenny and Lance narrowed their eyes at Samantha. After several silent moments where Samantha once again felt like a lab rat, Lance chuckled. “Well, did those words burn when they came out?” he asked.

“What?”

“‘I’m sorry’ and ‘thank you.’ Did it hurt when you said them?”

“Not funny, Lance.”

“I’m not being funny.” He took her hand and she tried not to flinch. His thumb rubbed over her palm in slow, smooth strokes. “I know this is hard for you: putting up with me, helping Dorothy, dealing with Cole. You’re doing a wonderful job.” He smiled at her as he rose and released her hand. “Keep up the good work.”

He walked into the kitchen. She watched him go, aroused and hating the feeling, especially since she already decided not to act on it. The almost-sex they’d had the night before was as far as she would let it go.

Samantha turned to Jenny, who was grinning. “What?”

“What, what?”

“Don’t play all stupid with me.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Now’s not the time to be cagey, Jenny.”

Jenny shrugged and continued to smile. “You two are really cute together, you know.”

Samantha choked on a sip of coffee. “
We
who?”

“You and Lance. I can almost see the sparks between you. I’ve never seen anything like it before.”

“There are no sparks. You’re hallucinating.”

“’Fraid not. But if you want to deny it, by all means, go right ahead.”

“I’m not hiding anything. For your information, I’m protecting something.”

Jenny gave Samantha that all-knowing smile before interlocking their arms. “Ah, I get it. You want him, but you don’t want to admit it. Afraid of what it will do to you.”

Samantha nodded. “Something like that. Especially after what I learned last night.”

“Well that sounds interesting. You can tell me all about it while I pack.”