AJ's Salvation (31 page)

“Mommy. Mommy! You’re squeezing me too tight!” Lesso moved in her arms, and she slowly blinked. Waking up was hard and her body demanded more sleep. 

“Morning, you two.” Shannon came in; followed by a guy Aly had never seen.

She sat up, combing out her hair with her fingers. It took her a second to realize that it was all stiff and that her blood still coated it.

“I need to take a shower,” she announced, getting up. Her legs were hurting, but so were her arms and her whole body really.

“Let me get a nurse,” Shannon offered, and Aly glared at her. 

“I can do it myself. If I don’t, they won’t let me see Jam,” she protested, and Shannon slowly nodded, looking like hell. She clearly had seen Jam already.

“Before you go, you need to sign papers. That’s Kent. He works with the adoption agency. I’ve been making sure everything was ready in case the plan worked out.” She raised an eyebrow and Aly understood that the guy didn’t know what she talked about. Aly did, though. Shannon had somehow managed to get the signature on the custody papers.

“You mean us coming down here. Too bad we got in the middle of a fight,” Aly replied calmly. She didn’t mind lying any longer. Alessandro would never return to the Karmisons and that was all that mattered.

“Jamison Loane signed the papers to agree on you adopting his son. You need to sign, too, so that in case –” 

“Don’t.” Aly gave the guy a sharp look and then nodded at Alessandro, who was listening intently, then she arched a brow, holding out her hand. 

She was handed a pen and the papers, and her eyes fell on the second line, the one holding Jamison’s name. It was shaking and not nearly as masculine as she had seen previously, but it was there. He had been awake. It gave her hope.

“Congratulations. Zack Karmison is now officially your son,” the guy said and then stepped back. Shannon was crying silently, and Aly thought about the fact that this probably was as hard for her as it was for Alessia. They all had hoped Jam could’ve been among them to enjoy that moment.

“Thank you. For everything. For being here last night and getting his signature. For waiting for me to wake up.” The agency worker nodded and then left, telling her that he’d have the papers along. Shannon told him just to get everything to her and she’d deal with it. Aly didn’t mind, even though she knew she’d be in town until either Jam walked out of this hospital or … the second possibility she wasn’t even ready to consider.

She vanished in the little bathroom then, glad that someone had brought her clothes. They didn’t exactly fit, but once she got out of the shower, she didn’t care any longer. Phil was there and so was Dorly. God, she had missed her friends. 

They stayed a few feet away, and she silently thanked them. Any hugs and she might start to scream.

“Look, Mom, Phil’s here! And Dorly!” Alessandro held onto the two as if they were part of his home, and he couldn’t wait to be back there. 

“I know, Lesso.” She smiled, but with all the people that she loved in one room, she knew one person was missing. She had to see him now, had to say all that she wanted to tell him in case he … in case he never woke up again.

“Philomena, can you maybe…” Was she really ready to go there?

“Lesso, you can stay with Dorly for a few minutes, can you?” Aly asked, and Lesso looked at her, looking suddenly so much more grown up than the last time she had seen him. It scared her and made her worry that he had lost his innocence. It would be another loss she’d heavily grieve.

“I wanna see Dad, too.” Aly gasped, bringing her hand to cover her mouth. “They said he’d never wake up again. Can I say good-bye? Isn’t that what you were going to do?” he asked, and she hesitated a moment before nodding.

Taking his hand, she followed Phil out of the room. Her best friend definitely knew where she had to go, and Aly had a hard time ignoring how everyone looked at her. God, they knew. Hell, did everyone know? It wouldn’t be long until the handcuffs would click, that much she was sure of. 

“No, Dad …” The broken sob of her son pulled her mind back, and she gritted her teeth before turning to the open doorway of the intensive care unit. He was bandaged. Every little bit of him seemed to be covered one way or the other.

Lesso didn’t care about hurting Jam; he just threw his little body over his father’s bed, sobbing hard. “I’m sorry for being a bad boy, Dad. I didn’t want you hurt. But they say you saved my mom. You’re a hero, Dad. My hero!” 

Aly was pissed at herself that she had been out enough that people obviously could say many things to her son. She understood that they all were trying to help, but she’d feel better if she could just shield him from all pain and the reminders for it.

As if. She knew that was a dream, but it was all she had left.

She and Phil stood in silence for a long time until Alessandro’s sobs ebbed away and he started to breathe regularly. “He fell asleep,” Aly whispered, and Phil nodded. 

“I’m gonna take him away. Be prepared to have nurses come in all the time. I’ll make a mention to give you some time, but he’s under strict supervision,” she explained. Aly didn’t care how many people would witness her misery. As it was, the whole town seemed to know about it anyway.

She waited until her son and her best friend were gone, then she moved toward the bed, her knees giving out just as she reached it. All the tears, sobs, and fears she had held in over the last couple of weeks finally broke free until Aly was almost choking on her heartache. She clung to Jam’s hand—the only thing obviously not destroyed by the monster—and pressed it against her cheek.

“Forgive me. I should’ve left when you told me to. I thought I’d be ready to protect you when all my life you’ve been protecting me. You deserved it. I was sure I’d be able to bear the pain for you. I failed.” She paused, trying to collect her thoughts. “Our whole ride has been ridiculous. Jamison, I just got you for the first time in my life, and now, I’m supposed to let you go again? How can I when I’ll never find out if maybe, just maybe we’d make pretty babies? I will never have the chance to show you how amazing you are. I’ve seen the doubt in you, but Jam, you would’ve been an amazing dad. I don’t want to say good-bye. This is not good-bye.” She had to stop again, her voice breaking. She wanted to get up and kiss his cheek since a mask covered his lips, but her body wouldn’t move. She was kneeling in front of his bed as if she needed absolution and maybe that was exactly what it was.

“You gave your life for me, and I wasn’t prepared. I’m still not. Come back to me, you stubborn idiot. See what you managed! See how the people react to you. Jamison, don’t leave me. This can’t be good-bye.”

She had no idea how long she was there on the floor when a hand landed on her shoulder. She was too scared to turn around. If they took her away now because of the lies she had been telling, they all had been telling, Jam’s death seriously was for nothing. It couldn’t be.

“I can’t go to prison,” she mumbled, not turning.

“You won’t.” That voice sent shivers down her spine, and Aly jumped up, standing protectively in front of Jam. Not that anyone could harm him much more than he already was.

“You need to leave,” Aly snarled, but the woman across from her shook her head.

“I came here to tell you that we took it all back. I retracted the missing person’s case from back then. I told them we only filed that since we hadn’t had any idea about Jam having sole custody. As well, my daughter will be going to prison. With my husband God knows where, I think it’s time to do the right thing. There’s no real need for any of you to make a statement because if Jamison Loane should really die, it’ll be murder, but I still wanted to tell you that whatever comes, I will back you up.
You
, and not the monster my husband raised. She has no funds whatsoever whereas you and Alessandro …” Aly actually saw how Thea Karmison swallowed while saying that name, “will get all the assistance you need.” 

“I don’t want anything from you. You had your chance.”

“I wanted my grandson. I thought you’d never allow me to see him because you know I’m a Karmison,” Thea admitted, and Aly couldn’t help but think she looked like a broken woman. And in so many ways that was probably true.

“How sure are you that your husband won’t ever return and that your daughter will be locked up while I will walk free? Can you guarantee that?”

A small smile played over Thea Karmison’s face and Aly had the hint of an idea how beautiful the woman once must’ve been. A trophy, without a doubt, in her husband’s collection of riches and awesomeness. “I’m so sure that I’d bet my entire fortune on it.”

Aly couldn’t deny that she liked that answer, but since she was standing by the deathbed of the only man she had ever loved, she wasn’t yet up to generosities.

“Maybe, in six months or so, you can call Alessandro up and talk. And by a call, I mean via phone and nothing else.”

Thea slowly nodded, her eyes going to the blanket-covered body behind Aly. She wouldn’t step away from his head, wouldn’t give a woman who had allowed his abuse to go on to look at his broken form.

“I hope he comes out of it. He deserves to be thoroughly loved without reservations,” the woman mumbled thoughtfully.

“He is thoroughly loved,” Aly assured her, crossing her arms in front of her body.

“How are you?” Thea asked, and Aly wanted to give a pert reply, but then she reconsidered.

“I have a broken son thanks to our family. He cried himself to utter exhaustion on his father’s lifeless body. I have a concussion, and while I’m heavily medicated, I can feel all the bruises your daughter caused me because they serve as a vivid reminder of what Jam has gone through for years. A man I loved all my life protected me, and I didn’t even know it. The way it looks, I won’t have a chance to make it all up to him, so what do you think? I’m alive, and for now, I guess that’s all I can ask for.”

Thea nodded and then turned just as a nurse came in. “You need to leave, Miss Rhyme. Your body needs rest and your son is awake, asking for you. That crazy woman told him to stay where he was.”

Crazy woman? Aly arched a brow. It had been a while since she’d heard Phil called that. “I’m going,” she promised.

“Yeah, he won’t go anywhere anyways,” the nurse replied nonchalantly, and Aly felt like committing murder.

“I think we need another nurse to watch over Jam,” Thea decided from the doorway, and Aly gratefully looked at her. For once, they were on the same page at least.

“Alessia, you’re still here.” The young doctor came back in, and Aly looked up. She had lost track of time, but she didn’t mind. 

“I’ll be here until he either opens his eyes or his heart stops beating,” she replied. “Hey, Lucy.”

The woman came over, her straight hair falling down her shoulders, making her small face look even slimmer. “I brought you food,” she told Aly. Alessia just nodded.

“Thank you.”

“I brought you a Chai Latte, too,” Lucy went on and this time Aly’s head whipped up. “Honestly?” she asked, craving the sweetness. 

“You’ll get it under one condition,” Lucy replied, settling down in the chair across from her. It was for whoever else visited Jam. Most of the time Greg sat there.

“What’s that?”

“Tell him good-bye and start living your life again. You are wasting away in front of my eyes, and I will not and cannot ignore that any longer.”

“Keep the Chai. He’s here because of me, and I left him once before already. It’s never going to happen again,” Aly insisted, her head whipping up just as Lucy jumped.

“He reacted to your promise,” she announced, and Aly quickly quenched all hope that was threatening to rise up.

“Watch,” she said, taking Jam’s hand. “Always and forever. That’s how long I’ll be yours,” she whispered, and there was a series of spikes in his brainwaves. 

“Does that happen every time?”

“Every time I promise to stay with him,” she agreed, and Lucy turned to her.

“Okay, so you know it means nothing, right?” she asked and even though Alessia had tried hard to tell herself the same thing, it made her angry to hear it from Lucy’s lips.

“Forever, Jamison, right? You promised me.” Another irregular wave. 

“Alessia,” Lucy started

“Always.” It was nothing more than a hushed whisper.

Utter silence spread in the room as the cardiogram registered an increased heart rate. Jam coughed between them, and Lucy jumped into action while Aly stood frozen. 

“Mr. Loane, you’re awake,” Lucy exclaimed, and Jam coughed again then cleared his throat.

“I promised,” he rasped out, and Aly couldn’t do anything but stare. His head turned, his green eyes finding her.

“What? Disappointed now?” He wanted to know, forcing a smile even though it was clear how much pain he felt.

“Fucking idiot,” she fussed, feeling hot tears streamed down her face.

“Doc?” he asked, and Aly watched as Lucy paused.

“Mr. Loane?” Lucy inquired. 

“Is it okay for me to be kissed?”

“Can you breathe?” she asked and then took the mask from his face. It sounded harsh, but at least he was drawing the air into his lungs all by himself, holding out a shaking hand to her. Aly wanted to weep with happiness. Maybe, just maybe, they had gotten a lucky break.