Against The Wall (21 page)

“My dad folded his firm about seven years ago,” Jess murmured.

“That’s interesting. Maybe he was paid to do that.”

“No!” Jess shot back. “He would never take:

“So you remember all this?” Tanner asked. “The trial?”

“No. I never kept up with Dad’s trials. I was in college. I lived in the dorms. I wasn’t even here most of the time. But I know he worked on a case that changed him.” Jess ran her hands through her short hair. “He closed the firm and took a job in the public defender’s office. He wanted to help people who just needed a second chance.”

Tanner had to laugh at that. “Guess he grew a conscience too late.”

“That’s not true!” Jess yelled. She advanced on him, her fury emanating from her like white, hot energy. “In all the years I’ve seen my parents together, those were the toughest months they ever went through. I didn’t know why, but Dad was miserable. Mom told me he dreaded getting up every day and when he got home, he just shut down.”

“Like I said. Sounds like he had a problem with his conscience.”

Jess’s eyes looked tortured. “Maybe he had a problem with the whole trial.”

“He wouldn’t be the only one,” Tanner muttered.

“It was his job to defend Alex Juneau. It wasn’t his fault that Maurice sabotaged you.”

Maybe. But maybe not. Tanner hadn’t decided yet. If St. John knew Tanner was being railroaded then he held as much culpability as anyone.

Tanner intended to find out.

As long as the guy didn’t die before he spoke to him. Which just made one more reason he needed to help Jess find her family. He had business with her father.

Tanner continued to study the pictures. Jess was the image of her mother with the exception of her father’s eyes. If he’d ever actually taken notice of St. John’s eyes, he might have recognized the similarity to Jess, but he’d been too preoccupied, and rightly so, with his own lawyer and dismal representation.

Exhaling hard, Tanner leaned his head back and stared at the recessed lighting in the ceiling. He had one question in particular to ask Jess’s dad:

Did you know Juneau set me up?

Because if St. John did know…Tanner was better off where he was right now.

As much as he thought his anger would die with Juneau, he’d been wrong. Now it was directed at someone else.

A car pulled up in front of the house and Jess ran to the door. This must be Dave. The guy looked like the average egghead. Unlike Jess’s brother—or all her brothers—who was big and strong, this kid was short, skinny, and wore glasses with dark, heavy frames.

Jess had the door open and he strolled in.

“Hey,” he said, giving her a quick hug. “I was surprised to hear your voice when I called. I was expecting your mom or one of the boys.” didn’t come along that often. back t him

Boys? Glancing at the pictures, Tanner had a hard time thinking of these giants as boys.

Dave finally glanced his way then back to Jess. “Everything okay?” he asked. The question made Tanner feel like a menace. As if the words ex-con had been tattooed on his forehead for the world to see. A familiar shot of shame arrowed through his gut.

“Yes. Fine.” Jess made quick introductions and ushered Dave into the dining room where Juneau’s laptop waited on the table. She pulled out the chair and gestured for Dave to sit. “I need you to find something for me on this thing.”

Dave looked between the two of them, suspicion in his brown eyes. “Is this legal?”

A hell of a first question. But since the owner of the computer was dead, did it matter?

“Don’t ask.” Jess leaned over Dave and accessed a particular file titled
Finances.
She leaned back and looked at Dave. “Can you find and access financial accounts on this thing?”

After studying them both for a minute, Dave sighed. He punched a few keys and different pages came up on the screen. “I don’t know,” he said, drawing out the words. “Let’s see.” Silently he went to work, then hit a page and stopped. “I need a password,” he said.

“We’ve been trying to find a master list of passwords. Do you think you can find that instead?” Jess asked.

Dave shrugged. “I can try.” His fingers flew over the keyboard again on his face didn’t bode well.

“Isn’t there anyway to get around passwords?” Jess asked.

“If there is, no one told me.” He sat back in the chair and looked up at her. “Look, I don’t know what Bren told you, but I’m not a hacker. I might spend a lot of time on my computer and mess around a little, and I can usually get rid of a virus or fix something wrong, but I’m not so sure about nosing around in someone else’s computer. I usually have someone with me who knows the computer and can help me get in.”

Jess nodded, her eyes wide, her hands fidgety. “Okay, then, thanks for coming by.” She walked toward the door, surprising Tanner.

That was it? She was giving up?

Dave followed her to the door. “You going to tell me what’s wrong?” he asked.

She shook her head. “Can’t. And I’m asking that you say nothing to anyone about this visit. It’s important, Dave. Not a word to anyone.”

“This sounds way intense, Jess. First, I can’t find Bren. Then you’re freaking me out with this computer shit and telling me not to say anything to anybody. If you guys are in trouble then you should get help.” Dave glanced at Tanner, suspicion apparent in his eyes, before he looked at her. “How about you come with me and we talk.”

Jess caught the insinuation circumstancesatayto. He didn’t trust Tanner. “I’m okay with him.” She held Dave’s gaze “I promise. It’s okay.” She opened the door and Dave slowly backed out.

“Call me if you need anything, Jess. I don’t like what I’m seeing.”

Nodding, Jess forced a smile and closed the door. She rested her head against the wood, her shoulders sagging.

Tanner’s anger evaporated at her body language. She was tapped out. Jess moved away from the door. She looked pale. Hallowed out and empty. The circles under her eyes seemed darker, as if the last few minutes had stolen all her hope and now nothing remained but despair.

She reached the laptop and shut the lid. “You should go.”

What the hell was she thinking now? “Why?”

She faced him, and the fire that usually burned in her eyes had dimmed. “Because Maurice is dead and I…” She swallowed hard. “You’ve been through enough and there’s no reason for you to risk your life further.” She turned away and pulled her cell phone from her pocket.

“What are you doing?” Tanner made it across the room in three strides and snatched the phone from her hand.

R, but the look

Chapter Sixteen

Jess woke up. Her gritty eyes hurt as if she’d been crying. Maybe she had been. Her dreams had been scary, filled with visions of her family bloody and beaten. She’d seen them from a distance, but no matter how far or fast she ran, they stayed out of her reach. Her chest felt constricted and air wheezed in and out of her lungs with painful gasps.

The setting sun glowed orange and pink along the thin horizon outside the window. Another day almost gone and Jess was no closer to getting her family back. Or finding them.

Heaving herself out of bed, she splashed water on her face in the bathroom and changed into a pair of her mom’s loose drawstring sweats. She studied her pale reflection in the mirror. Physically, she felt sluggish, as if every move she made went against the tide. Mentally, she felt inconsequential. Helpless. Without the financial information or Maurice, she couldn’t save her family. She only had the computer and/or herself to offer, and what the hell would Facinetti want with her? Her only hope was to trade the computer for her family, and Facinetti might just laugh at that idea. Panic edged its way past helplessness.

The smell of pizza wafted into the room, but Jess wasn’t hungry. She went downstairs anyway, each step jarring her back into real life, only to find a truckload of food scattered across the countertops. Pizza boxes, a bucket of chicken, a huge salad, and a six pack of soda.

Tanner looked up after tossing a plastic bag in the garbage. “I called the number for the pizza place on the fridge,” he said. “The guy on the other end asked if I wanted the usual and I figured, sure, why the hell not. I was expecting a ten-dollar pizza and I got dinner for ten for forty-five bucks.”

A reluctant smile c stripped off his T-shirta St. Johnmrept across Jess’s face. “It’s the usual order when they call Dr. Pizza.” She chuckled at his wide-eyed survey of all the food. “Don’t forget, there’s five men and my mom.”

“Let me guess. The salad is your mom’s?”

“You’re partially right. Mom and Dad split the salad. She told him he needs to watch his weight so she’s making him eat better.” Jess set a couple of plates on the counter. “Have at it. You paid for it.”

Tanner lifted the top of the first pizza box. “Half cheese, half green pepper.” He wrinkled his nose. “Who eats green peppers on their pizza?”

“That would be me.” Jess faced him. “Problem?”

“No, no. No problem,” he said, quickly back peddling as he opened the second box. “Ah…meat lovers. Now we’re talking.”

Jess hid a smile. Tanner sounded like her brother Eric. “The other pizza has everything on it.” Either Tanner hadn’t heard her or didn’t care. He took a huge bite out of his slice, closed his eyes and chewed. The absolute pleasure on his face made her warm inside. That a simple bite of pizza could make him so happy only drove home how much he’d missed the last seven years. He’d had a similar look on his face when he’d had her pinned against the wall earlier and when she’d been on top of him on the sofa.

A blush heated her cheeks and Jess turned back to the counter, keeping her embarrassment private. She’d had sex with this man.

Unprotected
sex.

A giant wave of heat exploded in her middle, resulting in a full body panic flush. He’d been in prison for a long time. Who the hell knew what had happened to him or if he carried any diseases. How the hell did she ask?

“Aren’t you going to eat?” he asked. He’d settled at the big kitchen table and added a second slice of pizza to his plate along with two pieces of chicken.

More than ever, her stomach felt a little queasy and she couldn’t seem to move or make eye contact. The chair scraped as Tanner grabbed her plate and set a pizza slice on the middle. He poured a soda into a cup and placed everything next to him at the table. Then he guided her into the chair.

“Eat,” he told her. “You need to keep strong.”

He was right. Her mother would be brainstorming how to fix the situation, not shutting down. So Jess forced pizza into her mouth. She ate and drank and concentrated on keeping the food down. With a little more sleep, she might even be able to come up with a plan. A way to rescue her family, a way to salvage the current horror flick her life had become.

Of course, she had to add the possibility of a sexually transmitted disease because life wasn’t bad enough without it. God…she was so stupid.

“You’re thinking way too hard over there,” Tanner said before sipping his cola. “What’s going on inside that brain of yours?” for so longatayto

Probably nothing he’d want to talk about, but she’d have to ask eventually unless she wanted to live what was left of her life in fear. “We had sex earlier.”

He lifted one eyebrow. “We had fucking
amazing
sex earlier. So?”

She swallowed. “So…we didn’t use a condom.” There. She couldn’t get more to the point than that.

Tanner nodded, wiped his hands on a napkin. “You’re not on any kind of birth control?” he asked carefully.

“I’m on the pill, but…”

He waited and when she didn’t say anything else, he tilted his head sideways. “I get it. You’re worried about what Juneau said earlier. You’re afraid you’re going to catch whatever disease I got in prison.”

Jess couldn’t deny it, but she couldn’t affirm it either.

Tanner looked her straight in the eyes. “Contrary to what that asshole said, I never ‘took it’ anywhere in prison. Before this afternoon, I haven’t had sex in over seven years. So if you’re asking if I’ve given you an STD, I haven’t. I went into prison clean and I came out clean.” He squeezed his empty soda can like tissue. “
And
I’m not apologizing for this afternoon either,” he said, facing her. “It was the best damn twenty minutes of my fucking life.” His eyes were hard and angry, but he tipped his head back and stared at the ceiling. Shame swamped Jess. His anger came from hurt. She’d hurt him. A full minute ticked by as they sat, silent. When he looked at her again, the anger was gone. “Is that it?” His tone softened. “Anything else you need to know?” He spread his arms wide, but not in a threatening way, ready to take whatever she dished out.

“No,” she said stoically. “That was about it. I was just…thinking. I was worried…” Nothing came out the way she wanted. “I didn’t mean to imply that…”

He sighed, ran a hand through his hair, faced his plate, but didn’t eat. “I know. It was a fair question. Forget it.”

But she couldn’t. She’d made him feel as small as Maurice must have. She owed him the same honesty. STD’s worked both ways. “I’m clean too,” she said quietly.

His head turned a fraction. She felt his eyes watching her, assessing her.

“I haven’t had sex in a long time either.” Maybe that was why she’d come like a rocket earlier. Not only had she forgotten the pleasure of sex, but she was pretty sure she’d never had
that
kind of sex ever in her life. Nothing had ever been as explosive, or erotic. No man had ever made her feel as absolutely necessary as Tanner had. She could just blurt out how many times she’d had sex in the last half a dozen years, but there was only so much a girl could embarrass herself in one day.