Against All Odds (6 page)

Nathan shakes his head. “Not guys like that. Maybe afterwards. But at first, we both know, that’s not how you get their attention.”

“I’m not going to have sex with a guy just to get him to like me.”

Nathan laughs. “Not sex, Shell, just other stuff. Enough to get them interested.”

I don’t answer, but inside my heart falls a little more in my chest.

“Do you know how to do other stuff?” he asks softly, moving even closer to me on the couch. He takes his hand and rubs his fingertips slowly up my arm until he reaches my neck. My mind tells me to get out of there, but my body has a mind of it’s own.

“I could teach you,” he says as his hand travels down the front of me now, outlining the top of my shirt back and forth slowly. I let out a little gasp and he pulls back laughing.

“See, Shell, sex gets everyone’s attention. And as much as you hate to admit it, that includes you.” He then gives my leg a little pat, gets up and leaves the room.

I hate him.

***

This is exactly why I can’t be friends with Nathan. He doesn’t know how to be someone’s friend without turning it into a joke. I mean, what does he think? Just because he has more experience than me it means he can treat me like I’m stupid? I definitely have enough experience for Matthew Russo. For sure. I mean, I think I do anyway.

That’s not the point. The point is Nathan’s a jerk!

I’m still thinking about our little run in from this afternoon in the living room when I sit down for dinner with my dad and Missy. Nathan’s not home and Missy tells me he went to Matt’s house after practice. Great. I can only imagine what they’re talking about.

“You have no reason to be nervous honey. You always get them to see things your way,” Missy tells my dad.

My dad sighs and rubs his hands together. He hasn’t touched his dinner. You can tell that he’s beyond stressed out.

“This isn’t just any normal client. He’s the number one rapper in the country Missy. You have no idea the type of pressure I’m under. This could change everything for our firm.”

Missy gets up and rubs his shoulders. “It will work out, trust me. We’ll all get dressed up and go to this dinner party in a few weeks. We’ll impress him and you’ll land your client. I promise you.”

My dad nods. “Yes, good thinking. We need to show a good family image.

Togetherness.”

Missy nods. “Of course we do. Nathan can bring one of the nice girls he knows from back home. We’ll come off as a well-grounded and together family.”

I notice my dad’s shoulders getting less heavy as he starts to relax a little bit.

Then, as if he’s just seeing me for the first time, his eyes land on mine. The stress in his face becomes clear and visible again.

“Are you going to be able to find someone to bring to this dinner, Victoria?”

I jump a little in my seat. “You mean like a date?”

My dad sighs and looks to Missy for some help.

Missy walks slowly around the table to where I am and sits down gently next to me. “What we’re trying to say Victoria, is that this will be a very important night for your father and for this family. This could change a lot for us down the line money wise.”

Money wise? Is she kidding? The only reason she even has money is from her first divorce. It’s not like she’s actually gone out and worked for it. So for her to sit here and lecture me about the future financial stability of our family is pretty ridiculous.

“So the thing is this,” Missy says, talking really slowly like I might not understand, “it’s not exactly about the date. It’s about the right date.”

“Okay,” I ask just as slowly, “and what’s the right date?”

My dad slams his hand down on the table and pushes his dinner plate away without touching it. “I’m going to my office,” he announces, leaving the room in one swift motion.

I look down at my salad and slowly start pushing it around with my fork, too embarrassed to meet Missy’s gaze.

“Don’t worry about him,” she says quietly, almost as if she’s afraid he’ll hear her.

She then glances down the hall. “He’s just really stressed out with work stuff. He’ll calm down after he lands this case.”

I can’t figure out if she’s trying to reassure herself or me, but I nod anyway.

“Just do your best to get yourself a nice date, okay? Someone your age who’s handsome and well put together. We need to show a good well-rounded family image.

Maybe Nathan could hook you up with one of his friends from basketball. Just for a night. Those boys love doing him favors.”

She says it as if the only way I could get one of Nathan’s friends to take me out is if Nathan asks them to. I feel tears start to form behind my eyes but I push them back as my dad walks back into the dining room.

“Will you bring me some coffee?” he asks Missy, not looking at me. Missy jumps up and runs into the kitchen like my father wanting coffee is a life or death matter.

For a second I think he’s going to turn and walk back down the hall without saying another word, but at the last minute his eyes meet mine. “Don’t mess this up for me Victoria,” he says with a serious glare.

Then he’s gone again.

And right then and there I decide that I’m going to get a guy like Matthew Russo to be my date for this dinner party.

No matter what it takes to get there.

***

Later in the night, Nathan’s lying on his bed with open books all around him, doing his homework.

“Need any help?” I ask casually walking into his room.

He laughs as if I just told him a joke. “Shell, you do realize I’ve been on the Dean’s List since like 6th grade, right?”

I shoot him a surprised look. “Really?”

He raises his eyebrows. “That hard to believe?”

“No,” I shake my head, “I just thought...”

“You just thought what?” he says sitting up on his bed. “That I must be really stupid or something just because I’m good at sports, right?” I shrug guiltily as he shakes his head at me.

I walk slowly back and forth in front of his dresser glancing at all of his trophies.

I bend down and start reading each title to myself over and over. He plays even more sports than I thought. It’s not just basketball Nathan’s good at. It’s every sport imaginable.

“What’s wrong with you?” he asks, looking at me strangely.

I drop the baseball trophy for ‘Most Valuable Player 2011’ at the sound of his voice. Nathan charges off the bed and catches it right before it hits the floor.

“Jesus, Shell!” he says placing the award back in its place on the shelf. “Relax, would you. What are you so worked up about?”

I don’t say anything for a second. Instead, I just stare at him.

Nathan sighs and looks me in the eye. “Stop being weird, okay?”

“You were right,” I say, not looking at him.

“I’m always right,” he says, full of himself as always. He grabs a bottle of Gatorade off of his nightstand and takes a long swig.

“Nathan,” I tell him, “I’m trying to be serious, okay?”

His face softens and for a second I feel like he might actually care about what I’m feeling. But I push the thought out of my head and try to get back to business. This is probably the most awkward conversation I’m going to have in my life and I want to get it over with.

“What’s up?” he asks softly, setting his bottle back down on the nightstand.

I look down at my hands and speak softly. “You were right. About me not having experience with all that stuff.” He doesn’t say anything so I continue. “The thing is, you’re right about Matt too. I can’t get a guy like him right now. I mean, I probably could, but I couldn’t keep him. What I’m trying to say is that I want to be confident in myself and who I am around guys.”

Nathan sighs and runs his hands through his hair. “I can understand that. But unfortunately the only way you’re going to be able to do that is to get over whatever insecurities you have and, not to be blunt, start hooking up with guys. But I don’t know really know how to suggest that to you without it making it seem like I’m telling you to go be a slut.”

“Well,” I say almost in a whisper, “did you mean what you said? About teaching me?”

Nathan lets out a small laugh. “Oh, totally. Take your clothes off right now.”

He jumps up from his bed and starts digging through his dresser, taking out a pair of boxers and basketball shorts. I realize he thinks I’m joking and once again I have the embarrassing task of telling him that I’m not.

“I’m being serious,” I say looking him in the eyes for the first time.

His face grows serious and he doesn’t say anything for a few seconds. The silence is killing me and it feels like forever before he finally speaks.

When he does all he says is my name. “Shell.” It comes out in an almost sad way. A way that tells me he feels badly for me.

“Oh,” I say quietly, “I get it. You aren’t attracted to me.”

I feel like I might cry soon so I make a move for the door. He steps in front of me, stopping me with his arms.

“No,” he says shaking his head, “it has nothing to do with that, trust me.”

“Then what is it?” I ask confused.

“I was just messing around with you, having fun. Don’t take this the wrong way Shell, but you’re not that type of girl.”

“What? There has to be a type your willing to hook up with now?” I ask him, still hurt.

He shakes his head, clearly frustrated that I don’t get what he’s trying to explain to me. “You’re not the hooking up type. That’s not enough for you. That means you have standards, which is great. But I just…I can’t get involved in all that. All that’s sure to come from a situation like that is drama.”

“That’s not true. I can be totally non-drama filled.”

“Oh really,” he says looking at me amused. “So let’s say me and you hooked up right here, right now. And then tomorrow I brought some girl home with me after practice and marched her right past you and into my room. That would be completely and totally okay with you, right?”

I don’t miss a beat. “Absolutely. Look at it as a business arrangement, nothing more. As soon as I’m comfortable and confident enough with myself, we stop. Simple as that.”

Nathan pauses as if he’s considering it. Or maybe he’s fighting back and forth on whether or not it’s okay.

Finally, he shakes his head and says, “I don’t believe you would be okay with it, Shell. Nor do I think you really want to do this. Sorry.” He then turns around and heads toward the door. “I better shower.”

“Nathan,” I call reaching out to touch his arm, “I’m sure. I am.”

He stops and turns toward me. “Fine,” he says sounding annoyed. “Let’s go then. Kiss me.”

“What?” I say, a little taken aback.

“You heard me,” he says, shrugging. “You’re ready, so kiss me.”

I take a step back, confused. He shakes his head.

“See Shell, you aren’t ready. And this isn’t you. So please just stop lying to yourself.”

Then he turns around and heads for the door. And this time I don’t stop him.

***

“Do you think hooking up with a girl is all about looks?” I ask Angelina over the phone a few hours later, studying my body in the mirror as I do.

“What do you mean?” she asks sounding confused.

“I just mean, do you think that guys wouldn’t hook up with a girl just because she’s ugly? Or do you think other factors could be added in?”

“Well,” Angelina says pausing, “I guess that would depend on if you were talking about a relationship or if you were talking about just hooking up.”

“Definitely just hooking up,” I tell her right away. “No relationship anywhere in sight, not even a little bit.”

“Then for sure it’s only about looks.”

I frown and look at my reflection again. Okay, so I’m not exactly a model or anything, but I’m definitely not horrible looking. I mean, I have a cute face, shiny brown hair, and my legs are a little bony, but they’re not awful. My boobs aren’t exactly huge, but they aren’t small either. B cup is average, isn’t it? And my butt’s average. I don’t know, how can someone judge his or her own body anyway? The whole situation is starting to annoy me.

“So, I can’t hang out tomorrow,” Angelina says cutting me off from my thoughts.

“Why not?” I ask. “I thought you were coming over for dinner.”

“I have a date,” she announces happily.

“Um, with who?”

“Dustin from newspaper!” she squeals.

Dustin is this really nice kid who’s in newspaper with us. Angelina and he have been flirting back and forth for months now, but nothing’s ever come from it. That is, until now apparently. I know I should be happy for her and I am. It’s just this is probably the worst possible time for her to spring her newly found love life on me.

I force a smile and try to express some excitement for her. “That’s great, Ang.

I’m really happy for you.”

“Thanks,” she says. I guess she doesn’t pick up on the pain in my voice.

My dad knocks on my door and I sigh. “Listen, I want to hear all about it, but my dad just walked in. Can I call you back?”

“Say no more,” Angelina says sounding like she feels sorry for me. Then she clicks off on her end and all I hear is silence.

I drop my phone on my bed and turn my attention to my dad. “Hey.”

“So,” he says in the same tone he used earlier tonight at dinner, “did you talk to Nathan?”

For a second I feel myself panic. Is it possible that after I left Nathan’s room he went to Missy and my dad and told them how crazy I was? That I was like trying to jump him in his room or something? I take a deep breath and remind myself to keep cool.

“About what?” I ask, trying to sound innocent.

My dad looks at me like I’m an idiot. “About finding you a date for this party.”

Oh, that. I feel my heart start to slow down and beat normally again.

“I’ll have a date Dad,” I tell him.

“Yes, but that’s not what I asked you,” he’s quick to point out. “I asked you if you talked to Nathan about it.”

I shake my head. “I don’t need Nathan’s help to get me a date.”

My dad doesn’t say anything for a second. “So you want me to talk to him for you? Is that what you’re saying?”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying at all.”