After Tex (15 page)

Moms?
Megan stopped the machine and considered the word. She'd barely grown used to the idea of being Tess's legal guardian, but a mom? Her? She supposed that's what her new role amounted to, but hearing Jake express it was a shock just the same. The very thought made her tremble.

How could she be anyone's mother, when she'd never had an example? She tried to remember what it had been like when she'd lived with Sarah O'Rourke, but the memories—even the good ones—had faded. She could remember the scent of chocolate chip cookies baking in the oven, but that memory had been reinforced by Mrs. Gomez over time. Now it wasn't clear whether the smell brought back memories of her mother or the housekeeper who'd become her surrogate mom.

Of course, a case could be made that Megan knew precisely what not to do as a mother. She knew not to run off and abandon an impressionable kid. It wasn't exactly an inspirational guideline, but it would do for a start. Beyond that, she and Tess would just have to muddle through.

With that in mind, Megan reached for the phone and dialed Todd's number. True to form, he responded at once, sounding as alert as he did at midmorning.

“Can you clear my schedule for tomorrow and Friday?”

“What? Why?”

“I'm going home,” she said, making it clear that
it wasn't open for discussion. “Do whatever it takes to make that happen.”

“You're the boss,” he said, but there was an unmistakable edge of disapproval in his tone.

“Yes,” she said decisively. “Yes, I am. I'll call you from the plane tomorrow.”

“I'll be looking forward to it,” he said in a way that suggested he might have more to say on the subject when he knew she was trapped in a plane several thousand feet in the air.

“You're a wonder, Todd.”

“An
expensive
wonder,” he suggested.

Megan laughed. “I'll take that into account when we talk tomorrow.”

“We're talking bonuses, a promotion and who knows what else,” he warned.

“Not a problem,” she assured him.

When she'd hung up, she began to consider just what it would take to persuade the ultimate New York whiz kid that he'd always wanted to be a cowboy.

 

“She's coming home
early?
” Tess repeated Jake's words, her expression torn between amazement and confusion. “How come? Am I in trouble or something?”

“As far as I know, she just decided to cut her schedule in New York short and come back a day early,” he told Tess. “She called from the plane an hour ago.”

“From the plane? Doesn't that, like, cost an arm and a leg?”

“I doubt she worried about that,” Jake said dryly. “Now, the question is, do you want to ride to Laramie
with me to pick her up? We could maybe catch that movie you're so gung ho to see while we're there.”

Tess's eyes widened. “Really? You mean it?” Then her expression fell. “Won't Megan be mad if I'm there? She'll figure if I'm fixed up enough to come to Laramie, then I should be in school. Besides, you said she was gonna be tired when she got back.”

“This was her idea,” Jake assured Tess.

The girl seemed unwilling to accept the offer as the thoughtful gesture it was. “Probably just 'cause it saves her from having to go back on Saturday,” she said.

“Maybe she wanted to do something nice for you, since you've been cooped up in the house for a few days,” Jake suggested. “Now, do you want to go or not?”

Her expression brightened at last. “Don't get all worked up. I'll be ready in five minutes,” she said, bouncing out of bed and hobbling unsteadily toward the bathroom.

“Slow down,” he warned. “Don't go spraining the other ankle.”

“You were the one in such a hurry,” she reminded him.

He chuckled at the defiant tone, always ready, always just below the surface. But even so, it couldn't undercut the excitement threading through her voice. To his astonishment, he thought he'd heard the same tone in Megan's voice.

“Brush your teeth,” he called after Tess.

“I know better than to go out with doggie breath,” she shouted right back. “How about you? Did you
use that minty stuff so you can give Megan a big ol' kiss when she gets off the plane?”

“Don't you worry about what I plan to do when Megan gets off the plane. Keep bugging me and you'll wait in the car.”

She poked her head out of the bathroom. “No way. I ain't never been inside an airport before. I want to see the planes.”

Jake stopped in his tracks. “You've never seen a plane?”

“In the sky. Not up close.”

He regarded her intently. “Is that why you were so dead set against going to New York? Because you didn't want to fly?”

She stared back at him belligerently. “Are you saying I'm scared?”

“It wouldn't be such a terrible thing to admit. Lots of people who've never flown are uneasy about it. So are some who do it all the time.”

“Like you?”

“Actually, I like to fly,” he said, then grinned. “I just like being on the ground and in control more.” Before she could guess his intentions, he scooped her up and carried her down the stairs.

“I can walk, blast it.”

“I know you can, but we'll get going a lot faster this way.”

Once they were settled in the car and headed to Laramie, he glanced over at Tess. “You didn't give me a straight answer before. Did you refuse Megan's offer to take you to New York because you didn't want to fly?”

“Maybe that was part of it,” she admitted, staring
out the window rather than at him. “But mostly I just didn't want to leave here.”

Jake released a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding. If Tess's only reservation about going to New York had been a fear of flying, it would be all too easily overcome. Megan would whip her away from Whispering Wind in a heartbeat. He knew it was selfish, knew it was wrong, but he was glad it was more than that.

“You really love Tex's ranch, don't you?”

“It's okay,” she said with feigned indifference, then finally turned to face him. Unshed tears made her eyes seem huge. “It was better when Tex was there.”

“Oh, baby, I'm sure it was.”

“Megan could turn out to be okay, I guess, as long as she doesn't make me do all that prissy stuff she does on her show.”

“She'll be great,” he said, making a promise he had no way of keeping.

“You'd say that if she locked me in a closet every night.”

“I would not,” he denied.

“You think she's perfect.”

“I think she's special,” he corrected. “There's a difference.”

“Yeah, well, you couldn't prove it by me.”

“You'll see.”

“You know what Tex used to say?” she asked, regarding him slyly.

“What?”

“That once the sale is made, a man should know enough to shut up.”

Jake held back a laugh. “And you think that applies here?”

“Oh, yeah. You are downright pitiful.”

“I'll try to contain my enthusiasm in the future.”

She gave a little nod. “Playing hard-to-get works. I've seen it in the movies.”

“I'll keep that in mind,” he said with a shake of his head. He really was pitiful. He was actually hanging on the advice of an eight-year-old. But the truth was, maybe hard-to-get wouldn't be such a bad idea.

T
here was something on Megan's mind. Jake watched her during the movie and would have bet his life's savings that she had no idea what the story was about or even who was starring in it. She'd been the same way on the drive from the airport into town. Her gaze had been focused on the scenery as if she'd never seen Laramie before. And all during dinner before the movie, she'd made only a cursory attempt at conversation, responding to Tess with distracted murmurs of agreement.

Had something gone wrong in New York? he wondered, watching her. Was she now convinced that she couldn't commute and that Tess would simply have to make the move east? Or was Megan considering abandoning Tess, after all? He didn't buy that last possibility. He was pretty sure she'd made a legal—if not an emotional—commitment to keeping Tess. So what the devil was on her mind?

Jake realized when they were finally in the car heading back toward Whispering Wind that he'd been no more aware of the movie than Megan had. Tess's excited attempts to discuss what they'd seen drew blank stares from both him and Megan.

“Geez-oh-flip, did you guys sleep through the
whole thing?” she grumbled. “I might as well have gone by myself.”

“Sorry, sweetie,” Megan said, reaching into the back seat to give her hand a squeeze. “I guess I was distracted. If you enjoyed it, that's all that matters.”

“It was totally awesome,” Tess declared, and proceeded to explain the action plot in mind-numbing detail.

“Sounds spectacular,” Jake said, trying to muster up some enthusiasm.

“Like you give a rat's behind,” Tess retorted.

“You weren't paying any attention, either, not then or just now.”

“Of course I was. I heard everything you said,” Jake protested.

“Okay. Who played that teeny-tiny part on the elevator when the bad guys tried to sneak into that skyscraper and blow it up?” Tess challenged.

Megan regarded him with amusement. “Yes, Jake, who was that?”

“Lauren Bacall,” he guessed wildly.

“It was a guy,” Tess said with disgust. “Geez-oh-flip, what is wrong with you?”

“I must have nodded off in that part.”

“I just told you not ten minutes ago,” Tess reminded him.

“Oh. Tell me again.”

“Forget it. I'm going to sleep. Obviously you two are way ahead of me on naps.”

After they'd driven another few miles, Jake glanced into the rearview mirror. Tess had stretched out across the back seat. He glanced over at Megan.

“Everything okay?”

“Fine,” she said, without meeting his gaze.

“How was your trip?”

“Okay.”

“You're back a day early. How come?”

“I taped the shows and took care of the most critical things. After I looked over my schedule, I decided I could handle the rest from out here.”

Despite her responses, Jake wasn't buying the idea that everything had gone smoothly. Something had happened. “The tapings went okay?” he asked, convinced her mood must have something to do with those.

She shrugged. “It's hard to tell at the pace we were shooting them. Todd's going to overnight the finished tapes so I can take a look. We crammed a lot of work into a little bit of time. I just pray it doesn't look rushed.”

He realized he had no idea just what her work schedule must be like. “How many did you do?”

“Ten.”

He stared incredulously. “Ten shows in three days?”

“In two days, actually. I spent Monday in the office, catching up on everything there.”

“Sweet heaven! No wonder you were practically comatose in the movie. I'm surprised you didn't fall sound asleep.”

She gave him a weary smile. “I slept on the plane.”

“Megan, how long do you think you can keep this up?”

“As long as I have to, I suppose. I'll get used to it.”

He noticed she didn't sound nearly as confident as she had the last time the subject had come up. He thought of the property he'd bought a few days earlier and wondered if now was the time to bring it up again.

“Wouldn't it be easier to do the tapings here?” he probed.

“Easier, but not terribly practical,” she said.

“We'd have to find facilities, bring the crew out here, find housing. I can't just uproot all those people. Whispering Wind isn't exactly loaded with four-star hotels, and Laramie's too far away to be practical.”

“Couldn't you hire people here, or maybe out of Chicago?”

“Absolutely not,” she said at once. “I took a lot of time putting together a great team to do the show. I can't just say, ‘Sorry, guys. It's all over. I'm going to do the show in Wyoming and you're out of work.'”

“Then give them the option of coming here,” he suggested. “Let it be their decision.”

She scowled at him. “Why are you pushing this so hard?”

“Because it's plain to me that it's not working this way,” he said.

“It's been one trip, Jake. Naturally there are adjustments to be made. I'll make them,” she said defensively, then sighed. “I am thinking of bringing Todd out here for a while.”

“Your assistant, right?” he said, thinking of the brisk, protective man he'd spoken to the day before.

She nodded. “It'll be a hard sell, though. Todd isn't exactly into wide-open spaces. I can't imagine
what he'll have to say when he discovers that Whispering Wind doesn't have a sushi bar.”

“To our credit, if you ask me,” Jake said.

“What's sushi?” Tess asked sleepily from the back seat.

“Raw fish,” Jake said.

“Oh, yuck.”

“My sentiments exactly,” he agreed.

“Don't knock it till you've tried it,” Megan admonished Tess, then turned to Jake. “And you stop trying to influence her. Let her try it and reach her own conclusions.”

“She's the one who said it sounded yucky,” Jake protested, grinning at Tess in the rearview mirror. “Didn't you?”

“Uh-huh,” she murmured, clearly half-asleep again.

“Okay, so Todd will miss his sushi. Anything else?”

“Oh, yes. Add in the lack of an upscale men's store and he'll probably be traumatized. Todd does like his designer clothes.”

“I'll explain to him about mail order, in case he's never heard of the concept,” Jake promised.

“I'll ask you again, what's your stake in this? And don't tell me you're worried about the strain it's putting on me. That's hogwash.”

He shrugged off the accusation. “Okay, I'll admit it. I don't give a damn what you do. I'm not the least bit worried about you. I'm just in it for the fun of hassling you.”

Megan's scowl deepened. “I'm not buying that, either.”

“Then you tell me what I'm up to, since you're such an expert on my motivations.”

“You want me to use that industrial park for some reason,” she said, her expression thoughtful as she studied him. “It can't be because you care about the economy of Whispering Wind, so it must mean there's some way you'll benefit from it.”

Her gaze narrowed. “You bought it, didn't you? You bought that property and you're looking to make a killing on it.”

He was impressed. She'd always had great powers of deductive reasoning. “Well, you're half-right, anyway. I did buy it, but not for the reason you think. I'll loan it to you rent free on a temporary basis, if that's what it takes to prove that my intentions are honorable. You turn it into a first-rate production facility and we'll call it even, if you decide to pull out later.”

Megan seemed thrown by the offer. “Why would you do that?” She followed the direction of his gaze, obviously saw his quick glance into the rearview mirror. “Ah, I think I get it. For Tess, of course.”

He nodded, then called Tess's name quietly. Only when she didn't respond, indicating that she'd finally fallen soundly asleep, did he say any more. “Tess wants to stay right here, in Tex's home. If I can see to it that that happens, I'll do it.”

“You amaze me.”

“Why?”

“I never figured you for a softie.”

He glanced at her. “Don't be fooled, darlin'. I can play tough when the circumstances call for it. Do anything to hurt that child and you'll see.”

“What is this bond between the two of you?”

“Maybe I just like her. She's a good kid.”

“Try again.”

“You know me so well. Why do you think it is?”

Megan hesitated only briefly. “You identify with her, don't you?” she said slowly. “You remember when times were tough for you, when you didn't have a mom you could count on.”

“And?” he taunted.

She regarded him with less certainty. “There's more?”

“Of course.”

“Tell me.”

“I can also remember a time when the only person in the world I had to count on was you,” he said quietly. “I don't want Tess to be let down the way I was.”

Megan looked as stunned as if he'd slapped her. For a moment, he almost regretted bringing her betrayal up one more time, but the sad truth was it was at the core of everything that had happened between them. He might be over the bitterness and anger, but clearly on some level, as painful as it was for him to acknowledge and for her to hear, he still didn't trust her to do the right thing. Maybe he never would. Trust was a fragile bond. It didn't take much to sever it forever.

Unfortunately, that didn't seem to have stopped him from wanting her.

 

After her conversation with Jake, Megan would have preferred going to a public hanging over going with him and Tess to the postponed dinner at Peggy's
on Saturday night. However, she refused to cancel on her friend again. She knew Peggy had gone to a lot of trouble. The last time they'd talked, she'd worriedly gone over the menu to make sure that she was having dishes Megan liked.

“With all that fancy stuff you fix on TV, I wasn't sure if you'd eat plain old barbecue anymore,” she'd explained.

“It's been ages since I've had really good barbecue,” Megan insisted. “I'd love it.”

Peggy's sigh of relief was audible. “Good. Then that's what we'll have. I'll see you guys at six. Johnny likes to eat early, because his day starts at the crack of dawn. You probably prefer stylishly late, but—”

Megan had cut her off. “Six is just fine. I know what ranch schedules are like.”

No, Megan thought, she couldn't back out on Peggy now. It would be a slap in the face. Besides, Tess was looking forward to it. She'd been on the phone off and on all day with Peggy's daughter, deciding what CDs to bring along. Maybe Jake would have the good grace to call and cancel, but it was almost time to leave and Megan hadn't heard from him yet. Obviously he intended to stick it out, too, probably just to irritate her.

Megan's wardrobe no longer ran to denims and cotton. She had to search long and hard to find an outfit that was casual enough for the occasion. She didn't want anyone to think she was putting on airs, flashing around in fancy clothes and jewelry just to prove what a big success she'd become.

She finally settled for the same chocolate-brown linen slacks she'd worn for one of the tapings and a
tweedy hand-knit sweater in shades of orange, brown and rust. Though the sweater was from a designer collection, anyone who was adept with knitting needles could have recreated it. She knew, because she'd demonstrated the pattern on her show a month back. If she could master it with her clumsy fingers, anyone could.

When Jake arrived at five-thirty, he surveyed her with such thoroughly masculine approval that it brought heat flooding to her cheeks. She was pretty sure they had to be one shade brighter than the rust yarn in her sweater. How could he make it so clear one minute that he hadn't forgiven her and then look at her as if he wanted to devour her the next? Of course, no one had ever said the brain and the libido were directly linked.

“Is Tess ready?” he asked.

Megan merely nodded, worried that any words she spoke would come out sounding vaguely breathless. She refused to give him that satisfaction after the painful note on which they'd parted.

“Shall I go get her?” Jake asked, regarding her with knowing amusement.

“No, I will,” she said, and fled.

At the top of the stairs, as she paused to catch her breath, literally and figuratively, Tess emerged from her room.

“Did I hear Jake?”

“He's downstairs.”

Tess regarded her solemnly. “You okay? You look kinda funny.”

“I'm fine.”