Adrastia (The God Chronicles Book 4) (16 page)

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, a tear sliding over my cheek, from relief or fear I didn’t know.

His face contorted into an expression I’d never seen on him before, one of pain and sorrow, and he stepped toward me hesitantly, reaching a hand out and slowly wiping the water from my face.

“Damn it, Avalon,” he said softly. “You’re going to destroy me.”

“I’m confused,” I stated simply, leaning into his touch as my instincts told, even though I’d wanted nothing more than for him to stop touching me moments before.

“I am too,” he said, just as surprised by the confession as I was. “I’m not even supposed to let myself think of you as a human.”

“Why?” I asked, stepping closer to him.

“You will ruin me if I let you get too close,” he muttered, his other hand reaching for my hip, pulling me up against him like it had a mind of its own.

“I don’t understand,” I mumbled, sighing as his arms wrapped around me.

“Why do you let me hold you like this?” he asked suddenly. “After how I treated you before?”

“I don’t know,” I replied, twisting my fingers into the fabric of his shirt. “I should be running away, trying to escape. But, it’s nice to be held after everything that’s happened, even if it is by you. I didn’t realize how badly I needed a hug until I got one.”

I looked up into his eyes, my stomach twisting while my brain yelled at me to think straight.

You’re supposed to be mad at him!
it screamed at me.
He kidnapped you! He hurt you! He touched you without permission!

My body seemed to have a mind of its own, though, easily remembering what it felt like to be owned by him, caressed by his lips, and held against him in a most delicious way.

“Am I your prisoner?” I asked timidly, recognizing the look in his eyes and movement of his body.

“Yes,” he confirmed, mouth hovering just above mine.

“Are you going to kill me?”

He pulled back some, eyes searching mine before he answered.

“I don’t know what’s going to happen to you,” he replied honestly. “Everything is jumbled from where it was before.”

“Were you going to kill me before?”

“Yes.”

I bit my lip, backing away from him and leaning against the tree again.

“Thank you for being honest,” I stated breathlessly. “I think I need some air.”

He nodded, his face tight, hiding any emotion he might be feeling, and turned to leave.

“I’m going to sit on this side of camp,” he said uncertainly, stopping to look over his shoulder at me. “Don’t go too far. I will come and get you if you try to run.”

“Okay,” I whispered, having no doubt that he would.

He disappeared through the trees and my breath released in one great movement, tears pricking at my eyes.

Now that he was gone, it felt like I could think clearly again. Every time I saw him now, I remembered what his skin felt like on mine and my brain practically shut off, ignored in the heat my body felt. The Titan made it worse, feeling the change in my body and fueling it with her own fire and intentions.

I didn’t know if I should frown or smile over the fact that he’d kissed me again. Of course, being treated like I’d had no choice in the matter had been scary, terrifying even, but he’d made his point. It was much different from what had happened earlier. The first had been passionate but soft, versus this time where he’d hurt me and not cared at all.

He was going to kill you.

I’d known as much before, having heard him say almost just that, but having it put so clearly just now was unravelling. The fact that he hadn’t come right out and said he
wasn’t
going to kill me was also eating at me, making me feel more like running with every heartbeat that pounded against my chest. However, escaping would do me no good, a fact I’d accepted some time ago.

He said I would destroy him.

Whatever had he meant by saying that? The only powers I had rested with my Titan and there was no way I was going to purposely let her out again, not when it hurt so much. The fire was the only thing I could stand and even that made my skin prickle like it’d fallen asleep.

The world around me was crumbling again, changing from the normal I’d been used to. First I was human, on my way to being a doctor, helping people. Then I was a prisoner, treated like dirt, hurt, abused in almost every way. Now I was still a prisoner, but free to move alone, holding some power over my captor. It was like he knew something about me I didn’t, something he was sure would be the end of him. He didn’t shy away from touching me, though, from driving me insane with his kiss.

My fingers brushed over my lips once more and I looked in the direction he’d left, wondering if he was still watching me, thinking of whatever it was that had caused the change in his attitude. His wasn’t the only one that changed.

I
liked
being kissed and held by him. It was comforting somehow, when it should have been the last place I wanted to be. Cristos had saved me from the Titans several times. It was natural to think of him as a protector now, without all of his harsh treatment. Perhaps I was only being fooled into trusting him, but it really did feel like he was suddenly telling me the truth. All I knew was his touch instantly soothed me, wiping away the thoughts and fears I’d had before, pushing aside anything but the feel of his skin on mine.

Lust. I’d never really felt it before. Was that what this was? Now more than ever, it seemed it could be the culprit of my feelings. I could fight it, refuse to give in to something I didn’t want. I knew what happened to people who gave in, who let themselves fall into its trap.

I’d been scared for my life before, but now I was scared for my heart.   

Chapter Seventeen

The next few days found us walking through more countryside, avoiding any towns or major roads around us. Cristos had returned to his somewhat rude self, ordering me around when he felt I was moving too slow, but never following through on any of his threats to tie me up again. There were no more sudden kisses, either, something I was embarrassed to realize I missed.

Most of the time was spent silently, each of us lost in our own thoughts. I didn’t know about my captors—friends?—but the prominent thing on my mind was what was going to happen once we reached Sicily. Apparently, my death wasn’t a certain thing now, if Cristos was to be trusted at all. What was I supposed to do then? Hide behind a rock and watch everything else unfold? It seemed highly unlikely I would be able to do so, not if I was the bait drawing everyone in.

On the third day, around noon, we crossed the border into Poland, my nerves grating at me as we got closer to our end goal. It would take a few more weeks at least before we arrived, if we truly were going to walk the whole way. I was going to go mad if I had to stay silent for that much longer, dwelling on what could be the very short remainder of my time on Earth.

“So,” I asked, my voice greeted by their surprised faces as I broke the silence. “What’s it like to be the son of Zeus?”

Cristos laughed, his smile sending butterflies through my stomach.

“I imagine it’s just like being anyone else’s son,” he said offhandedly. “He taught me how to take care of myself and those around me. His love for my mother showed me how to treat women and his affection for me has given me many thoughts on how I’d like to treat my own children, if I ever have any.”

“He taught you everything you know,” I summarized, smiling softly.

“Arsenio, too,” he confirmed.

“I’ve always been more of their family than Poseidon’s,” Arsenio agreed, grinning as well. “But only because I didn’t want to live with my real father.”

“Why not?” I asked, curious.

“Poseidon and Audrey are very, uh, emotional,” he laughed. “It’s because of their powers, their connection to the ocean. Their moods can change as quickly as the waves do.”

“Wouldn’t you be the same way, though? Being his son?”

“The mortal side ties him firmly to the ground,” Cristos replied, grinning viciously. “That’s why he’s so stubborn—he can’t move from one spot to another without great effort.”

“If anyone here is stubborn, it’s you, cousin,” Arsenio chuckled. “You received more than one lightning bolt during our training, if I remember correctly.”

“You were punished with lightning?” I asked, shocked. “Isn’t that a little harsh?”

“It was more like a good stun,” Cristos snorted. “Not enough to really hurt me, but enough to put me in my place. I had a hard time in training at first, when we realized I hadn’t inherited Zeus’s powers. Instead of accepting it, like I should have, I was a little rebellious. Eventually, I settled into the powers I did have. Training was much easier then.”

“I’d never imagine a god having trouble with anything,” I mused. “Other than a human being better than them, that is.”

“You know your history,” Arsenio laughed.

“I watched a lot of movies,” I admitted, blushing slightly.

His eyes widened with excitement as he gave Cristos a look.

“Oh no,” Cristos mumbled, rolling his eyes.

“Finally!” Arsenio crowed. “Someone who will understand my movie references!”

He held his hand up for a high five, which I surprisingly obliged him, shooting Cristos a confused look.

“He’s always quoting something,” he said, shrugging.

“And he never understands them because he’s no fun,” Arsenio added, his grin growing wider by the second. “You have no idea how many I’ve been wanting to say, how many I’ve held in because I didn’t think it would be appropriate.”

“Appropriate,” Cristos snorted. “Said the man trying to get Aphrodite to fall for him.”

“Aphrodite?”

“The most beautiful woman who ever existed,” Arsenio said dreamily, seeming to fall into a vision of her.

Cristos laughed again, still leading us in the right direction. I’d never seen this side of either of them, the brotherly love and teasing they shared brightening both of their countenances greatly. With a start, I suddenly realized my presence, their mission with me, had been what made them cold and brooding. They’d disagreed over how I should be treated and it had driven a wedge between them until now.

“What about you, Avalon?” Arsenio asked, still smiling stupidly. “What was your home life like?”

“My mom was great,” I said, smiling softly, thinking of how she must be worried about me, having not heard from me within the normal time. I had imagined the Red Cross calling her, telling her they hadn’t been able to find me after the explosion.

She probably thought I was dead.

“And my dad,” I continued, my voice wavering slightly as I tried to keep tears at bay. “Well, at least the man I thought was my dad, was a heroic man.”

I frowned, thinking about how he hadn’t been my father at all. Had he known? Was there ever any inkling that I didn’t belong to him?

“He died in Afghanistan, right?” Cristos asked quietly.

“Yes,” I mumbled. “He, uh, was one of the first teams to be sent over when the war started there. Of course, the fighting had been going on for years, decades even, before then, but this was when they officially declared it again. He was a marine, and very handsome from what I can tell of his pictures.”

“You don’t remember him?”

“No.”

I fell silent, hearing my mother’s voice as she’d told me the story of his death, holding the box the president had given her after, housing his medal of honor.

“They went on a night raid, trying to get some civilians who’d been caught by terrorists, when they were ambushed. Dad was the leader of his squad and managed to get them all out, including two of the civilians. He caught the grenade that was thrown after them, too. Laid right down on top of it and told everyone else to run.”

Silence followed my short, summed up retelling, the gods apparently having nothing to say. I couldn’t help but think of what would have happened if I’d been so brave as to jump on the grenade that had killed Dimitri.

“You know,” I said after a few minutes, rubbing the moisture beneath my eye. “I don’t care what this thing inside me says, or what everyone else is saying. That man was my father, not Typhon. He took care of me, even if it was for only a short time. He loved me. I’d rather honor him with that place in my life than a beast I’ve never met.”

“I’m sorry for your loss, truly,” Arsenio said, his eyes revealing he was talking about more than the death of my dad.

“Thank you,” I mumbled, wiping away the rest of the tears on my cheeks.

The conversation had taken a turn I hadn’t expected, but for some reason it had felt nice to share that part of my life with them. It seemed I appeared even more human now, the knowledge of my life before gods having revealed to them how helpless I really was.

The dreaded silence fell upon us once more as we trudged along our own path, my own thoughts of my previous life swirling through my mind. It felt like at least another hour had passed before Cristos suddenly stopped, holding his hand up in a motion to stay silent.

The hairs on the back of my neck stood up in alarm as worry flooded through me, memories of how the air had felt right before the Titans attack the school seeming much like the space around us did now. Fear choked down the Titan, shoving her under a metaphorical rock as I shook in my boots. She fought back, trying to come to the surface to save us from whatever was coming, but my emotions proved to be too large a barrier for her to breech.

Slowly, silently, Cristos reached into the bag on his back, drawing his sword. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Arsenio do the same with his bow, concentration on his face as he looked for whatever it was Cristos had seen or felt.

As the golden hilt of Cristos’s sword glinted in the sunlight, I saw movement in the trees to my left, low to the ground, and jumped, stumbling into the path of whatever was lying in wait for us.

The beast that leaped out of its hiding spot was decidedly not a Titan. That fact alone startled me enough that I froze, staring as it descended upon me. I’d only ever seen drawings of griffins, like most of the other things I’d encountered recently, but none the depictions had done the real thing justice.