Adoring Addie (15 page)

I lifted Joe-Joe higher in my arms so his head rested on my shoulder and led the way. Anyone but Phillip would have asked where we'd been and what was in the cart, but he chattered away alongside me about cleaning out the irrigation pump at the farm he worked on as I calculated how I was going to get the hope chest up to my room now, especially if Mutter got home from Aenti Pauline's before Phillip left.

Phillip didn't offer to carry my sleeping brother, but he did open the back door for us. I headed straight for the living room, slipped Joe-Joe onto the couch, and hurried back to the kitchen, trying to be as quiet as possible, hoping to encourage Phillip to keep his voice low.

We chatted as I pulled ice from the freezer and then filled up the glasses. He acted as if nothing had happened, as if I'd never told him I wasn't interested in him and never would be.

As I bent the tray of ice to release the cubes, one popped onto the floor and skated across the floor. For some reason Phillip found it amusing and burst out laughing. I quickly scooped it up, hoping he would stop. At the same time a car door slammed in the driveway.

Daed and Timothy were home. I groaned out loud.

“What's the matter?” Phillip asked. “Are you afraid they'll mind that I'm here?”

If only.

I hurried to the back door, deciding the best thing to do was distract my father and brother. “Want some lemonade?”

“Sure,” Timothy said. “It's too hot to work right now.”

Daed shook his head in disgust but followed Timothy into the house anyway. I knew I was only stalling. I wouldn't be able to keep all of them in the kitchen forever.

I pulled more ice from the freezer, filled three more glasses, and then poured the lemonade, passing it around the table. As
I did, the sound of a horse's hooves beat across the driveway and then stopped. After a long moment they started up again.

A few minutes later, Mutter opened the kitchen door, ecstatic to see Phillip and me together, not even attempting to hide her emotions. I poured her a glass of lemonade too, asking her about her day. She started in on a story about Maggie and a baby lamb at Aenti Pauline's.

That got Phillip started about sheep and the latest shearer the farmer he worked for had used. The discussion shifted to the price of wool as the front door opened.

“Addie,” Mutter said, “go see who's there.”

I stepped quickly, sure it was Joe-Joe trying to sneak out to find Billy. It wasn't. My baby brother was still asleep on the couch.

It was Billy coming through the front door, carrying one end of my chest with the horse blanket still draped over the top. Danny had the other end and they both had their lips pursed together in shushing gestures, as if they needed to tell me not to say anything. Aenti Nell tiptoed behind them.

“Denki,” I mouthed.

They all smiled and started for the staircase. Billy tripped and banged against the newel post. Danny grimaced and made a circular motion with his head, indicating he needed to go first up the stairs. Aenti Nell waved her hands above her head. I stepped forward to take Billy's end, but just then Mutter called out, “Addie, who is it?”

“The boys,” I answered.

“What in the world are they doing?” she yelled.

Joe-Joe stirred, flopped to his stomach, and then settled back down.

Danny motioned with one hand for me to go back in the kitchen.

I did, slowly.

“Addie!” Mutter yelled again.

As I stepped through the archway, I said, “They're just taking a box upstairs.”

“A box!” Mutter hooted. “Is it full of crickets? Or snakes?”

“It's empty,” I answered. “But who's to say what they'll fill it with when they get the chance.”

Mutter shook her head. “Phillip, I'm sure you never tormented your mother the way my boys do me.”

I filled another glass with lemonade, for me, not bothering to put ice in it.

“Right?” Mutter was still trying to get an answer out of Phillip, probably wanting to emphasize to all of us, again, what a good catch he was.

Phillip grinned at her, and then said, “Speaking of my mother, I'd better get on my way home. I was just passing by and thought I'd say hello.”

He sure seemed to pass by our house a lot. Granted, it was on his way home from work—except for the detour up our lane. Still, I couldn't imagine anyone as persistent as Phillip, although I certainly hoped Jonathan would be—once he had the chance.

I made chocolate cream pie for dessert that night as a special thank-you to Billy and Danny. With whipped cream dripping down his chin, Joe-Joe asked what happened to the box, and I answered that the boys had put it upstairs.

Joe-Joe seemed satisfied. Billy and Danny kept their eyes on their slices of pie, seconds for both of them, but no one else seemed to have even heard Joe-Joe's question. Timothy and Daed were arguing about the workload for the weekend, and Mutter and Aenti Nell were talking about Hannah. After Danny finished, he pushed back his plate.

“Ach, Addie,” he said. “I just remembered. Hannah telephoned you today. She left a message.”

“What did she say?”

“Something about you visiting her. Spending tomorrow night, I think. And then going to church with her on Sunday.” Aenti Pauline and Onkel Owen were in a district to the north of us.

Mutter and Aenti Nell stopped talking.

Mutter's jaw jutted toward me. “What do you have planned?” Her voice held a hint of suspicion.

I stood and began collecting dirty plates. “I'm not sure.” Hannah and I hadn't talked about my spending the night at her house.

“Addie, we can manage without you.” Aenti Nell's voice sounded upbeat.

Mutter added, “Barely.”

Aenti Nell winked at me. “You should go.”

Hannah clearly liked Mervin. That meant there might be a chance I could see Jonathan. Sure, Onkel Bob had told us not to go against our parents' wishes, but we couldn't help it if we bumped into each other.

I put the dishes in the sink and turned back toward the table. “Mutter? What do you think?”

Aenti quickly added, “It would be good for Hannah.”

Mutter crossed her arms on top of the table, grasping her elbows. “I suppose . . .”

“Go give her a call,” Aenti Nell said. “The boys can clear the table.”

Timothy sprang to his feet. “I have work to do.”

Billy and Danny groaned.

Joe-Joe climbed from his chair and grabbed his own plate. “I'll help,” he said. “I like doing the dishes.” Sure he did. Standing on a chair and splashing water around was an adventure, not a chore.

“Denki, Joe-Joe,” I said. “I'll be right back to help.”

At least spending the night with Hannah would give me something to look forward to—besides filling the hope chest that was now in my bedroom.

After I left a message for my cousin, I put away the food the boys had piled up on the counter and then rinsed and dried the dishes Joe-Joe was washing. Next I spent an hour outside weeding the garden, and then I read Joe-Joe and Billy three library books, tucked them into bed, and started to close their door gently behind me.

Finally, it was time to fill my hope chest.

“Addie!” Mutter's voice startled me, and I ended up yanking the little boys' door closed with a bang. “Come here a minute.”

I followed her voice into her room, where her bed was covered with stacks of papers and books. “Help me put these away.” Her fingertips pressed against her temples. “I'm too tired.”

Several boxes littered the floor.

“Where did these come from?” I picked up a stack of yellowed notebook paper.

“My closet.” Red rimmed her eyes.

It appeared to be a scholar's papers. I looked more closely.
George
was written in the upper right-hand corner of the first one. I thumbed through the stack. It was a collection of essays, probably from his eighth grade year.

“How about if we get rid of these?” I put it in a box and picked up another stack.
Sam
was written on the top of it. “And these too.”

“Oh, no,” Mutter said. “I'm saving those.”

I frowned.

“Don't do that,” she said.

“Do what?”

“Judge me. Just put all of this back in the boxes on the floor.” She put her hands over her face, muffling her voice. “I want to go to bed.”

I began scooting stacks of papers into the boxes. “What are you looking for?”

“Something I saved from when I was a girl.” She spoke through her fingers.

“Anything in particular?” I asked, looking up at her.

She shook her head. In another minute, she sat down on the edge of the bed and turned away from me. I finished the job and pushed the boxes up against the wall.

“Anything else?” I asked.

She shook her head, her eyes on the boxes, but then she said, “Nell was so stubborn. She could have had lots of other suitors. She should have married one of them instead of reminding me every day what she gave up.”

“Mutter,” I said, stepping closer. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

Her head jerked up, a puzzled look on her face. “What was I saying?”

“Something about Aenti Nell not marrying.”

She shrugged. “It was her choice, jah? No matter what everyone said.”

“I don't understand. . . .” I wrinkled my nose.

Mutter yawned. “That's just it. I never did either.”

“Are you all right?” I sat down on the bed beside her and took her hand. My mother could be moody, but this was different. She wasn't making sense.

“I'm fine.” She yawned. “Just tired. You go on. Let me go to bed.”

I told her good-night and left the room, nearly bumping into Aenti Nell in the hall.

I put my finger to my lips and dragged her down to the end of the landing by the window. “Mutter was just rambling on about you being too stubborn to marry. What was she talking about?”

Aenti Nell shook her head. “Who knows?” But her words didn't convince me.

Since she wouldn't answer that question, I tried another. “Do you know what she's searching for? She won't tell me.”

Aenti Nell shrugged. “Pauline said something about the letters. That's what sent your Mamm up to the attic the other day.”

I kept my voice low. “
The
letters?”

“Jah.” Aenti Nell whispered much more loudly than I did. “Pauline asked what the story was way back when, about the letters Dirk sent.”

I froze. Of course that's what she was looking for. I managed to say, “Jonathan doesn't think his father wrote the letters.”

“Dirk always claimed he didn't.” Aenti Nell wrinkled her nose. “I wondered at times too.”

“Once Mutter finds them, we should know more, right? Dirk can look at them and say he didn't write them. We can figure out who did and put an end to the grudge.”

Aenti Nell exhaled. “I doubt it will be that simple. Or that she would show them to you.”

“Why?”

“It's complicated, jah?”

I nodded. “But not hopeless.”

She turned her head toward the window and gazed out over the yard, toward the barn. “Don't ask her about the letters.”

I didn't answer my Aenti. I couldn't promise I wouldn't, not if the opportunity presented itself. I didn't tell her I'd told both Mutter and Phillip what my true feelings were, but I did tell her what Onkel Bob had advised. She squeezed my hand. “It will all work out. Just wait and see.”

Sensing the need to change the topic, I said, “Denki, for getting the boys to carry the hope chest up.”

“Jah.” She put her hands to her bosom as she continued to look out the window. “It's beautiful. I'm happy for you.”

I gave her a quick hug and retreated to my room, closing the door firmly behind me, and then lifted the blanket from the chest. I ran my hands over the smooth wood, stopping at the carving of my name, admiring Jonathan's work, knowing his thoughts were on me every second as he carved it.

It didn't take me long to transfer the things I'd been saving from the hamper to the hope chest, breathing in the scent of the cedar lining as I did. I put the first quilt I'd ever made—lap size designed from simple blocks—in first and then the one I'd finished in the spring—a log cabin pattern made from my Bruders' old shirts. Next I put in pillowcases, sheets, towels, doilies, potholders, and oven mittens, filling the chest halfway.

As I closed it, there was a knock and Mutter called out my name. I quickly placed the blanket back over the top.

“Are you in there?”

I hurried to the door and opened it.

“I need your help again.” She pointed to the linen closet at the end of the hall. The cupboard doors were wide open and sheets, tablecloths, and towels littered the floor below.

“I thought you were going to bed.” I followed her toward the closet.

“I am—now. Would you put that all back in? And reorganize it. It was such a mess I couldn't stand it any longer.” She seemed sincere, but I couldn't imagine why it would bother her now when it hadn't for the last decade. Especially when she'd been exhausted fifteen minutes before.

She continued on to her room, shuffling along, favoring her bad knee, her skirt shifting back and forth across her hips.

I refolded each item and then stacked the sheets all together, twins on one side and doubles on the other, along with the pillowcases and then the towels.

I knew Mutter wasn't in a cleaning mood. She was definitely looking for something. I could only hope it was the letters and that Aenti Nell was wrong—I still hoped Mutter would be willing to show them to me.

Saturday after supper Timothy drove me to Hannah's. There seemed to be an unspoken agreement between Daed and the older boys—he wouldn't say anything about their cars as long as they provided rides for the rest of us, when needed. And although I'd sworn off riding with Timothy, I decided, since he hadn't been drinking, to accept the ride.

As we drove down the lane, I noted that Nan's car was at Onkel Bob's again. I sighed out loud. That meant my Onkel wouldn't be calling on my parents tonight either.

Cate stepped onto the porch and began waving.

“Stop,” I said to Timothy.

He grimaced but obeyed.

Cate came running toward the Bronco, to Timothy's open window. She leaned against the door, speaking to me. “Betsy's at the hospital. She's really in labor this time.”

“Are you going?”

Cate nodded, her face as bright as I'd ever seen it. “Nan is taking all of us.”

I was a little surprised to hear that. Technically, because Nan had left the Amish church, none of them should be riding with her, but maybe because she was originally from New York and it was so long ago, the bishop hadn't given it a thought.

I shuddered. It wasn't like me to track that sort of thing—that was something my parents would do. I was certain my Onkel knew what he was doing.

“I'm praying for Betsy,” I said. “And her Bobli.”

“Denki.” Cate's voice gave away her gratitude. I thought of their mother dying after Betsy's birth and how that must weigh on all of them now.

Timothy tapped on the steering wheel. “Can we go?”

Cate patted him on the shoulder. “At least you stopped.” She stepped backward.

Pete called for her as he walked toward Nan's car.

“Let us know when the Bobli comes!” I shouted as Timothy accelerated.

“I'll leave a message!” Cate called over her shoulder, jogging toward the car.

As I offered up a silent prayer, Timothy said, “You should just hang out with me tonight.”

I didn't know what made him think I'd want to do that, but I didn't ask. Instead I said, “I told Hannah I'd come over.”

“She's going to the same party I am. We'll just meet her there.”

I wrinkled my nose. “I'm spending the night with her. I told Mutter and Daed that's where I was going. She didn't say anything about a party.” Which was true. I'd just assumed there might be one she planned to go to, if her parents let her.

“That's not what I heard,” Timothy said.

“What did you hear?”

“That Hannah's about ready to go stir crazy.”

“That's why I'm going over.”

Timothy smirked and then turned on to the highway, speeding along. “She wants to hang out with Mervin.”

Everything was working as I'd hoped. Perhaps I'd see Jonathan after all.

“Those Mosiers are all such losers,” Timothy said. “Especially Jonathan. It's like he's from another planet.”

“He's an artist.”

“He's a sissy.”

“He's kind.”

“He pretends to be.”

I didn't answer.

“Don't be swayed by his acting,” Timothy said. “Phillip
might be boring, but Mutter and Daed are right. He'd be much better for you to marry.”

I crossed my arms.

“It's not like you to be so stubborn,” Timothy said.

“It's not like you to care about my life,” I shot back.

He didn't answer. We rode in silence—me fuming, him taking the curves too fast. He slowed, barely, as we sped through Paradise, then took a sharp turn down the road to Hannah's farm on the other side of the highway. He slowed as he turned into their drive, past the sign that read
Paradise Stables.
Onkel Owen trained and boarded horses.