Adam, Enough Said (This Can't be Happening) (24 page)

Fuck her.

Terry’s Diner
- I stared at the sign.

I'd been sitting in the parking lot
of Terry’s Diner for over thirty minutes debating whether to go inside or not, but as I took another swig from my bottle of Jack, I decided it was go-time.

Mia.
That fuckin’ bitch.

The bell over the door
dinged as soon as I walked through and I saw the back of her blonde hair standing behind the counter.

The moment she turned,
her face lit up... like always.

Breena
Wallace.

I
t had been weeks since I’d last seen her.

I checked in on her randomly
because, in some odd way, I felt responsible for what happened to her.

I'd come
- maybe once a month - have breakfast or dinner, chat with her briefly and then leave. She'd sort of become a friend, I suppose. I'd been dropping them like flies since Mia, but Breena had never judged me so I kept coming back – though I never stayed long, because everything about the girl reminded me of the night I fucked up my life.

Funny how things turn out
though.

But I didn't need a friend right now. I needed a woman. I hadn't had one since Mia
, and she had already moved on while my life weltered away in the bottom of a bottle.

And
Mia wanted a fuckin' divorce.

"Hey, Adam,
everything all right," Breena asked, carefully taking in my mood.

She was a p
retty woman, not half as pretty as Mia, but still attractive. Her platinum blonde hair was a shade darker now and her body had thickened up a bit, but she was still too skinny in my opinion. Her tits got bigger though. She had thinner lips than Mia, her cheeks were less plump and more hollowed, her nose was narrower, though not big, and her eyes were smaller and dark brown, not emerald green.

Pretty, just not the pretty I loved.

But Breena was sweet and, more importantly, she was still sweet on me.

I stalked toward her and I watched her
back grow rigid.

When I made it to her, I gripped her
waist, turned her and shuffled her forward.

"Adam, what are you doing
?" she whispered, but I didn't respond. The few patrons eating lunch stared at us, but I kept pushing her forward until we hit the restroom door.

"Get inside," I ordered
low and her head turned, her eyes hit mine and they widened a second before she complied. I pushed in behind her, and after a quick scan to make sure we were alone, I locked the door behind me.

“
Adam, what are we doing in here?” she asked uncertainly.

I walked toward her
.

S
he stepped back until her back hit the wall and she winced. I made it to her fast, pressed my chest in to hers, gripped her ponytail from the back and tilted her head up toward mine. She was taller than Mia by a good four inches, which was exactly what I needed.

Different.

“You want me,” I growled, and Breena’s breathing grew faster. Oh yeah, she wanted me still. But, instead of answering, she asked, “What happened, Adam?”

That was the thing
; I didn’t want to talk about what happened. I wanted to forget what happened. I wanted to forget everything.

I crashed my lips to hers and swallowed her whimper
in my mouth. Breena’s hands grasped my waist, but it was light and hesitant, not frantic and needy. I slid my tongue inside and when I tasted her, I wanted to cry.

I did cry.

It wasn’t the same.

I hated it, but
I needed more at the same time. I dropped my hands from her ponytail and fumbled with the button of her jeans until they were undone, then I pressed my hips into hers.

“Adam,” she breathed
and I kissed her harder, but she wouldn’t meet me like I needed her to.

Not like Mia
would have.

“Adam, sto
p,” Breena ordered as she tore her mouth from mine.

I froze.

“Stop this, Adam,” she whispered. “Don’t do this to yourself. I don’t want you this way and I know you don’t want me at all.”

I dropped my head to her shoulder and squeezed my eyes shut, but that didn’t stop my tears.

I let a few more escape, before I took a deep breath to stop them.

Breena wrapped her arms around me.

“What happened, Adam? Talk to me. Is it Mia?” she asked with worry.

God, she was a good person and I
’d just treated her like a whore.

I exhaled so hard my chest hurt
, before I pulled all the way back to look Breena in the eyes. She quickly wiped her mouth and buttoned up her jeans.

“Did I hurt you? Is your leg okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“I’m
so fuckin’ sorry, Breena. I’ve been drinking since…” I swiped a hand down my face. “…I don’t even remember the last time I was really sober,” I groaned and Breena gave me a sweet smile that I absolutely did not deserve.

“It’s
okay, Adam. I knew you were hurting… I could see it on your face. What happened?”

“
Mia met someone. I met her for coffee - sissy fuckin’ coffee - and she asked me for a divorce,” I admitted, my voice nothing more than a whisper.

“
Oh boy,” Breena whispered. “Are you going to give her one?”

I froze.

Was I? Could I finally let Mia go? Could I let someone else have her? Even if it was only holding on to her by a piece of paper?

“Fuck no,” I growled
, and to my surprise, Breena grinned.

“Good. Don’t.
Just go see her. Tell her exactly what happened and force her to listen.”

I shook my head. “It’s not that easy. She hates me. I killed our baby…she’ll never forgive me. I
can’t even forgive myself.”

“Hey,” Breena said
as she cupped my face with tenderness. “It wasn’t your fault. There’s a reason for everything, but with Mia…don’t give up hope. I have no idea what it’s like to lose a baby the way she did, so I can only imagine the kind of pain she’s gone through…and then add on top of that the shit with me…she’d probably kill me if she could. But if it’s meant to be, she’ll come back, Adam. In the meantime, don’t give in and don’t give up. And stop drinking. You stink.”

I sighed.

“Why are you still single?” I asked, and her confidence disappeared as if on cue.

“I don’t trust easily. You know that
. Besides, I’m defective,” she breathed and I lost her eyes.

“Breena, I’m so damn sorry.
I wish I could feel more for you.”

God, that was such a shitty thing to say.

“Hey, it’s not your fault.” At my scowl, she smiled. “You’re my friend. I know you only come in, maybe once or twice a month, but I still consider you my friend. You know that’s more important to me…but listen real close, Adam…if Mia comes back…when she comes back, I’ll understand if you pretend I never existed.”

“I --” She placed her finger over my lips.

“If she comes back in your life, you better fucking pretend I don’t exist. She’ll see me as the whore I was, not the person I am now.”

“Damn it, you weren’t a fuckin’ whore, and Mia’s not like that. She’d neve
r judge you that way.”

Why the hell am I defending her still?

“Just promise me,” she hissed, and I stiffened. “I don’t want to be the reason she leaves you for a second time. I can’t be. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.”

I narrowed my eyes
and lied, “Fine, I promise.”

It didn’t matter anyway
, because Mia wasn’t coming back.

Chapter
Eighteen

Two Weeks Later

Mia
Bryant

I was so tired. Actually, exhausted was more like it.

I slammed the car door to my littl
e 1968 Chevy Camaro shut, and hated the creaking sound it made. But I loved the way it looked…or I would when I could afford to buy her a new paint job. I sometimes wished I would have given in and let Adam buy me a new truck, but I had too much pride to take anything from him again.

Since I had
not been talking to him, Adam had tried to be smooth when that insurance check had come in for the truck I’d totaled over a year and half ago by depositing it straight into my personal checking account. Like I’d never notice twenty-three thousand extra dollars.

Idiot.

Looking back, I should have taken it all, but alas, I’d only taken enough to buy Cat.

Yes, I named my car Cat, ‘cause swear to
God, she purred like one.

After I bought her, I had a few important things done, like a new transmission, new tires and a complete check-up, but
any and all money I had left over, I had transferred back into mine and Adam’s joint account, and then closed my old personal one out and opened a new one.

I’d never wanted Adam’s
money.

I
’d never wanted anything from him but love, which was exactly what made asking Adam for that divorce two weeks ago excruciatingly painful. I’d thought he might fight me, and truthfully, I’d hoped he would have. I’d wanted him to give me some kind of sign that he still cared about me, but he gave me nothing but anger instead.

He’d even called me a bitch…and…well,
he’d always called women bitches, but never had he called me one.

And it had been like a slap in the face.

I’d also sort of figured he would have asked me about the guy I’d told him I was seeing - even though I’d only used him as an excuse - but Adam had only asked if I was serious about him.

Which of course I wasn’t. I liked Cole a lot, but I was still in love with Adam and always would be.

When he’d stood from that table in Starbucks, I’d wanted to stop him and ask him how he could just walk away from me like I’d never existed, but I hadn’t been able to bring myself to do it.

Plus
, I already knew it was because he didn’t care about me anymore.

I got to the front door of my
studio apartment and saw something white taped to it. Probably just another apartment memo, I thought as I ripped it off the door and unlocked it to go inside. I walked in, hung my purse behind the door, took the paper with me and plopped down on the couch.

I flipped on the
TV, put my legs up on the coffee table and opened the letter.

My heart sank
at the sight of Cole’s handwriting.

Mia,

I’m sorry. I should have done this in person, but I couldn’
t find the courage. You know I hate to see you upset. I know it hasn’t been long, but our relationship is no longer working for me. It has absolutely nothing to do with you. You’re an amazing woman, but some things have come up and I have to leave. I’ve been offered a job in Boston and I’m taking it. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime. I thought to ask you if you would move with me, but I realize that would be too unfair and selfish of me to ask that of you. Please find it in your heart to forgive me, but please, please, whatever you do, don’t look for me.

I’m heartbroken,

Cole

I balled up the letter and threw it as hard as I could across the room.

That motherfucker!

I wasn’t sad. I was fucking furious!

No, scratch that. I wasn’t furious, but I should be. Actually, I was numb.

Who the hell breaks up with someone in a fucking letter? Hell, Adam probably broke up with his bitches better than that.

Adam.

I froze.

W
as it just coincidence that Cole left me this letter only two weeks after I asked Adam for a divorce?

Yes, it had to be.

The fact that Adam didn’t care about me hurt one hundred times more than Cole’s chicken-shit letter. And to throw insult on top of injury, Eric had told me all about Adam’s new women. He had so many women now surely he’d be happy to get rid of me as a wife for good.

Or so I thought
...

Five Months Later

Mia
Bryant

“Mrs. Bryant? Are you there?” My attorney, the one I could hardly afford, asked after I said nothing. I was so mad that I was shaking. My heart was pounding and sweat broke out all over my skin.

“I’
m sorry. I don’t think I understood you. Could you repeat that?” I asked and clenched the phone tighter.