Abby Has Gone Wild (11 page)

“Jack!” I can’t help it, I’m crying.

“Baby, don’t cry. Why are you crying?”

“Because I’m happy! This is the most
thoughtful gift I’ve ever gotten.”

“Okay, sweetie, you know when you’re happy
most people don’t cry.” He teases me.

Sniffing, I wipe away tears. “Yeah well, I’m
not most people.”

“I know baby, I think that’s what I like the
most. Besides, this was the best I could come up with. I wanted to
get you a first copy of Pride and Prejudice considering you have
three copies but since those were the cost of a new car, this was
the next big thing.”

“These, this, was better. You didn’t have to
do this.”

“No way was I going to half ass your birthday
present. I’m sure because Christmas is in two weeks you’ve probably
gotten the whole happy birthday and Merry Christmas gift in one for
years.”

“Yes, that’s why my mom always splurges on
big ticket things like that television and the stupid amount of
jewelry she gives me. Thank you, I love it, I really do. Now why
don’t I go try this red one on? I’m in a red kind of mood.”

All too quickly it’s Christmas day and as I
lay in Jack’s arms gazing at the twinkling tree he had carted up to
the condo and helped me decorate, the words are on my lips. I want
to tell him I love him. Today had been a wonderful day the only
thing was, he’s tense and had been for the past few days. I know he
was upset that one of my gifts hadn’t been ready by Christmas day.
I told him I hadn’t cared. I loved the necklace he gave me in the
shape of heart in the tanzanite that was my birthstone. The perfume
and various scented soaps along with the lingerie had been more
than enough but he’d grumbled. Although he’d shown his appreciation
of the new laptop that had a larger screen than his previous one
and the large oversized recliner I’d seen him rocking in once while
I’d gone shopping and he’d played on his phone, he was still
tense.

Actually for the last week or so he’d been
tense and I’d caught him deep in thought. Yet, he’d acted as if
nothing was wrong, if anything our lovemaking had been more
frequent and with added hunger from him. His touches almost
constant, sometimes playful, other times it verged on needy. I
wanted to ask but my fear stopped me every time. I was scared our
time was running out so I didn’t, instead I responded with an
answering hunger. His body was where I laid as I read, in his lap
where I watched television and I sighed with relief as his hands
roamed over me constantly. But still, the tension wouldn’t leave
him.

So, because he’s tense, I’m afraid to say the
words. Instead, I get up and pull him into bed with me and show him
the only way I know how. I’ll regret it, but I don’t know that. We
make love slowly, gently and the pleasure is so strong I slip into
darkness from my orgasm. Does he know, I wonder, as he wakes me
again and again through the night to make love to me. He’s
demanding, sometimes it feels like he’s out of control and I urge
him on thrilled at his loss of control. Light begins to leak into
the bedroom and he takes me one last time and even though he’s had
me so many times I hurt from it, I don’t tell him that. I love him
too much and so I plead for more and at last he’s sated.

It’s only a few hours later when he slips
from bed to get ready for work. I hear him as he showers and
dresses. A part of me is worried that he’s gotten so little sleep
but I say nothing. I can’t, because although normally my last words
to him are, be careful, I know if I open my mouth I’ll tell him I
love him. So fear keeps my mouth closed as he kisses me
goodbye.

I hear the front door close and I roll over
and hug his pillow to me and cry.

My cell phone is ringing and I roll over
stiff from the night of exertion and still tired as I see it’s only
been five hours since Jack left for work and I’ve slept.

“Hello?”

“Abby Dixon?”

“Yes.”

“This Emmett Mosby, Jack’s Captain. I hate to
tell you this but Jack was in an accident. He was in a car accident
during a high speed chase and he’s hurt pretty badly.”

“What hospital?” He gives me the name. “I’ll
be right there.”

No, no, I don’t realize I’m shouting the
words. Jack was not hurt, Jack was fine, he was going to be fine. I
rip the covers off and I’m at the edge of the bed. I try to take a
step but my legs collapse under me. I’m rocking, crying, unable to
move. This is a bad dream, but my phone is ringing again. I didn’t
even realize I still have the phone in my hand. It’s Shane and I
fight to swallow and although I connect the call, I can’t say
anything.

“Abby, damn it! Who called you?”

“Emmett.” I croak.

“Damn it. I’m outside your door right now and
have been pounding for the last five minutes. Come on, you can do
this. Get up and let me in. Then you’re going to get dressed and
I’ll take you to Jack. He’s gonna need you to be strong, you can do
it. Come on, sweetheart.”

His words are soft and soothing and they
remind me of Jack and it gets through to me. I force myself up and
although my legs are shaking, I’m standing. I find a long silky
robe and tie it over my naked body. I stumble into the living room
and open the door. Shane is there and he looks like hell. His color
is gone and his blond hair is a wreck from repeatedly running his
hands through it. It hits me, this didn’t just happen.

“When did it happen?” Shane is pushing me
back, his hands on my shoulders. “No! Tell me right now! How long
ago did it happen and tell me what you know!”

“It was over an hour. It’s not good Abby, the
car rolled several times and caught fire. He had to be cut out. One
of his legs is a mess, the doctors still aren’t sure if it can be
saved. He’s got multiple third degree burns, up one arm and up the
side to his face. They’re also not sure about how bad his spine is.
There’s swelling, really bad swelling. Maybe, maybe he’ll be
paralyzed from the waist down but they won’t know until the
swelling goes down. It will take days, maybe weeks for the swelling
to go down.

He’s going to need you Abby but I get it. If
this isn’t something that you can handle then you can’t. He’s not
going to be the same pretty boy he used to be and added to that he
might be bitter about that. Not every woman’s dream man anymore, a
cripple.”

I have no memory of my hand coming up but the
smack across his face is loud and rings through the empty room.
“Don’t you dare talk like that! He could be burned from top to
bottom and live in a wheelchair I don’t care. That’s Jack you’re
talking about and he’s not a cripple.”

Shane is still and as I watch the shape of my
hand appear on his face, I’m shocked. “I’m sorry, please. I
shouldn’t have done that. I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, I’m not sorry. Jack’s going
to have a long road to recovery. He’s going to need someone
stronger than him at his side. I wondered about you, I thought you
were soft but you aren’t. I’m glad. Now go get dressed.”

The hospital is controlled chaos and there
are cops every where. Shane has my arm in his, guiding me past when
cops move to stop me. Mosby is standing with a doctor who leaves
seconds before we reach them. Mosby nods at me.

“I want to apologize for calling you, Shane
was right about that.”

“I don’t care, what about Jack? How is he
doing? What are they doing for him?”

“For now, they’ve done what they can. He’s
been put into a medically induced coma because of the pain of the
burns. Right now, they are preparing for the first skin graft. From
what I understand, they’re thinking two at least three weeks for
the coma. For now, they won’t take his leg. Turns out he also broke
his arm that was burned, they are wrapping it into the correct
position because they don’t want to put him in a cast when he needs
grafts.”

“Where is he? I need to see him. I need to be
with him.”

“Abby, this isn’t pretty. He’s in ICU for
now.”

“I don’t give a fuck that it’s not pretty. He
needs me, medically induced coma or not. I’m not leaving him.”

Mosby sighs and shakes his head but he gives
in. He takes me through and because of the burns and possibility of
infection I’m forced out of my jeans and tee shirt into scrubs and
a mask and I wash my hands with an odd scrubber.

It’s an automatic door that has to be pressed
and Mosby presses it for me. I step inside and I rock onto the
balls of my feet. It’s overwhelming the machines, the things on
drips going into his body. White gauze covers the right side of him
and over his forehead. There’s a chair waiting beside the bed on
his left side. Even though the beeping machine that tells me his
heart is beating is loud and annoying and right beside it, I sit in
it. I take his hand in mine, once again I marvel at how large it is
compared to mine.

I don’t know what to do. Holding his hand,
touching him was all I had thought about until this moment. So I do
the only thing I can think of, I tell him I love him and that I’m
sorry I was too stupid and afraid to tell him that last night. I
keep talking about the why, maybe because I didn’t want to love
anyone. I talk about how he made me feel and why I was sure I loved
him. I talk and I talk, until a nurse comes in telling me they are
ready for him in surgery.

I follow Jack’s bed until they push him
through the swinging doors. Shane steers me away and sits me down
in the waiting room and hands me a sandwich. I look at it without
interest. Relief is high that there were now fewer cops here.
Before it had felt like a wake and I hadn’t liked that I admit to
Shane. He nods and forces the sandwich on me again. I start to
shake my head.

“I swear to god if you don’t eat it I’ll
shove it down your throat. I don’t need to worry about Jack and
you.”

I take the sandwich and eat.

Hours later a doctor comes out and goes to
Mosby. I can hear them as I approach.

“It went well. I’m happy with the results.
He’ll need another graft but not right now. His body has been
through too much. He’s going to stay in the coma and in a week
we’ll go in for another graft and another week for the coma. We’ll
stop the drugs and allow him to come out of it on his own.”

“What about the spinal damage?” I ask.

“Not my area of expertise. They can’t know
until the swelling goes down though and that’s at least a week,
probably two.”

“Where is he now?”

“He’s being moved back into ICU. I want him
there until we bring him out of the coma. The grafts take time to
adhere, we used artificial skin, because of the size. Most of his
chest stopping at his stomach and then almost all of his back, his
entire right arm. But he was lucky the burns on his face are not
third degree. They should heal easily, there will be some amount of
scarring but from his shoulders up, it isn’t as bad as we first
thought.”

“Thank you Shane. I’m going back in with
him.”

“Abby, you need to rest, let me take you
home. You can come back tomorrow.”

“No, I’m not leaving him. I’ll call Claire to
bring me a few things but I’m not going home until he does.” I’m
washing my hands when a nurse comes to my side with Mosby and
Shane.

“Ms. I’m sorry but you aren’t family and
visiting hours are up in an hour. After that, you’ll have to go
home.”

Shane speaks up, “He doesn’t really have any
family, she’s his and the force, we’re his family.”

“I’m not leaving him. Coma or not, Jack needs
me here with him. He’s going to be scared and lonely and I won’t
allow him to feel like that. I’m staying right beside him until
he’s ready to leave this hospital. I’m not asking you, I’m telling
you. Now, move.”

Mosby sighs, “Look, I understand you’re doing
your job but that man in there is a highly decorated officer. Eight
years on the force and very well loved amongst his fellow officers.
He was injured in the line of duty. That doesn’t even convey just
how good of a man he is. You are going to have to get a cot for her
to sleep or at the very least a softer chair because I’m not going
to take her out of here. She’s right, he needs her, coma or no
coma.”

The poor nurse knew when she was defeated and
shrugged. “I’ll have someone bring down a recliner from birthing,
they aren’t the best but plenty of people have slept in them when a
baby took its sweet time.”

The first week is a blur of surgeons. The
orthopedic surgeon took him away on the third day and when he
returned pronounced he’d done his best and Jack would keep the leg
but always walk with a limp. The surgeon refused to talk about
Jack’s spine, referring to another specialist. Jack was wheeled in
and out for scans that the doctors refused to comment on, saying it
was still too early. Shane visited every day, sometimes just to
check in and stick food in front of me. Other times for an hour or
so and we would talk about Jack. I learned that Jack did have
family. He just didn’t know where they were.

His father had left for work one day and
never come home when Jack was six. Jack had an older brother named
Scott who had left the day he graduated high school and gone into
the army. Jack was ten at the time and there had been a few letters
but they had stopped by the time he was twelve. Jack’s mother had
been a drug addict who supported her habit by hooking, it had been
around then the cop Jack had mentioned had tried to help out.
Unfortunately, the cop had realized the situation had gone too far
and Jack had gone into foster care. It had taken a few homes before
he’d settled into one. He was lucky to have the cop helping him
with a job and setting him up with a woman in his neighborhood
willing to rent her garage apartment for next to nothing and some
errands.

Listening to what Jack went through, I was
even more in love with him. To come from a background so void of
kindness, patience and consideration and to have it in spades made
me ashamed of how willing I had been to give up on another person
after one bad experience.