A Woman Undefeated (36 page)

Maggie couldn’t understand why she was feeling so low in spirit. She lay in bed later, listening to the gentle breathing of Mikey, knowing that she was so lucky to have the care of her little son and the chance of living in a wonderful house in the near future. But, seeing Johnny again had unsettled her. It wasn’t as if they had meant anything to each other. Rather, she could still flush up with annoyance against him, because of the uncaring way he had treated her that day. She supposed it was seeing him and Madeline walking up the church path together, making all the girlish dreams she had once had, vanish into thin air. Most girls had dreams of being whisked away by a knight in shining armour, riding a white horse, but her dreams had been of a handsome sea captain, who had swept her away on board his ship; who had taken her back to the small hamlet of Killala, to live with her mother and Molly again.

After they had locked up the shop on Monday afternoon, Betty and Maggie set off down Burton Road, to visit Selwyn Lodge. Betty was full of her plans for each room of the house, but Maggie only listened half-heartedly as they passed St. Winefred’s. She gazed upon the doorway of the church and vainly daydreamed, that it had been her coming out on the arm of Johnny, though she would have worn a more simple dress for the marriage ceremony.

“They’ve gone on their honeymoon to Chester,” Betty said, after she had noticed her inattention. “Madeline told me it was to a little hotel on the road out to Mold. What’s bothering you, Maggie? Are you remembering when you got married to your husband? It is best to only think of the good times, I find.”

“I can’t remember many good times, Betty. Not after we were married anyway. Oh, I know I have Mikey, and I love every inch of him, but to see Madeline all dressed up, being wed to such a handsome man, made me see what I had missed out on. She really had the wedding of her dreams.”

“What I have found in my life, Maggie, to ensure my daily sanity, is always be thankful for what the good Lord sees fit to give you. Be glad of the day and don’t look for things that you may have had, or can’t have. Now, when we get to the house, I’ll let you choose your bedroom, but I hope it won’t be the one that I have got my eye on!”

Maggie couldn’t believe it when they stood in the hallway of Selwyn Lodge. To think that she would be going to live there soon. The hallway was as big as her old cabin in Killala, wooden floored, with a three-candled sconce hanging from the ceiling. The stairs leading up to the first floor were made of mahogany, as were the bannister and spindles.

The first room that she was shown, to the left of the hall, was the drawing room. It had a high ceiling, finished off with smooth white plaster and cornices, a crystal candled chandelier and a huge oriental rug. Its rich pattern, in blue and green, was edged with many cream fringes. The next room to see was the dining room. This had big wide doors that lead on to the place that Betty called the conservatory, or winter garden. It had been her father’s favourite room, filled as it was with plants from India, Siam and South America, which he had brought back from some of his many voyages. Here in this little warm oasis, most of the plants had survived.

The conservatory looked on to a paved area, where Betty said they could sit in the summer months and have afternoon tea. Beyond was a lush, verdant lawn, with many yellow and pink roses and other pretty flowers in the beds that lined the garden. A pretty arbour, where honeysuckle fronds trailed all over, gave a focal point to an entranced gazer such as Maggie. From a fast flowing brook that ran through the garden on its way to the sea, came a constant
source of water. It was because of this that they would be able to pump water into the house, as it came from a natural spring. The trees at the bottom of the property were there to hide a rather hideous feature, the colliery. Betty said it could be seen from the view out of the back bedroom windows. She advised her to avert her eyes, should she choose to sleep in one of those rooms. It wasn’t pleasant to look upon the slag heaps and the winding wheel.

The kitchen was large and airy, with a flagged floor and plenty of space for working, eating and being warmed by the kitchen fire range. Here, in the past, someone had been busy making rag rugs, as there were two, a blue one and a red one, and neither worn thin.

The builder had knocked down the outside privy and built a small extension, which now housed a store room and a scullery.

“Do you want to see upstairs now, Maggie?, Betty asked, trying to keep in the excitement Maggie could see she was feeling. “We did have five bedrooms, but because of the new bathroom, now there are only four.”

Maggie just nodded, she was still having difficulty taking it all in.

“What’s in there, Betty?” she asked, as they began to climb the stairs to the upper rooms. There was another door that Betty hadn’t opened, it was on the right of the hallway, as they had come in.

“It used to be the living room, but the couple who lived here never used it. They either sat in the kitchen, or in the dining room. It is rather damp, as it doesn’t benefit from the sun. The drawing room, which we will use instead, has a side window, which lets in the light. I’ll show you later. I’m thinking of having that room entirely re- plastered and the chimney swept in the future, but not yet, as there are plenty of rooms for just us three. Come, we’ll have a look at the bedrooms now. One for you, one for Mikey, one for me and the other for whoever gains our employment, though I may leave it empty, just for the use of visitors, and we’ll have two daily women coming in. There’s an attic as well, which could be converted to another bedroom. At the moment it holds the family furniture, those that hold special memories for me.”

The view from the bedroom that Maggie eventually chose was as wonderful as the one she had at Seagull Cottage. The room was large and airy and it was decided that Mikey would share it, as he was too little to sleep apart from his mother at that time. Betty had her old room, the one with the colliery view, but, as she said to Maggie later, it was possible because of poor coal production, that the place would be shut down soon.

“We’ll have such fun, Maggie, choosing all our furnishings, and a trip to Chester in the next few weeks wouldn’t come amiss,” she said happily. “Maggie, whatever is the matter, dear?”

She had seen Maggie’s face crumple. It was all too much for her. She was overawed with all she had seen and her emotions came flooding to the fore. Less than two years before, she had been a simple cottier girl. Her only thoughts were of keeping hearth and home together and the worry of where she was going to get their food. Now, here she was in that awe inspiring house and about to discuss fine and quality furnishing, when all she had ever been used to was a turf built cabin and a palliasse to sleep on.

“I’m sorry, Betty. ‘Tis this place. To think I was just a simple Irish girl and now yer askin’ me to live in a place so grand. I can’t get over yer generosity. I’ll do whatever yer ask ter make yer proud of me, but don’t ask me to choose things fer the house. I can go to the hardware shop and get us a ladle, pots and pans and spoons, but that is me limitations. Why don’t yer ask Miss Madeline to help yer? She’s an eye fer this kind of thing I’m sure, with all her designs and sketchin’.”

Betty was most concerned at her reaction, and most understanding.

“I’m sorry, Maggie. We’ve arrived at this moment from different directions. I wanted you here for company, never thinking about your feelings and the life you had before. Certainly all of this must be very daunting for you, coming from your background, as you have. I’m expecting more from you than I should, so we’ll go now to each room and I’ll make a list of what is needed. Then we’ll lock the place up and go back to our respective homes. We’ve got a lot
of sewing ahead of us, especially as soon it will be Ladies’ Day!”

Ladies’ Day again! Where had the last year gone to? It brought back memories of Annie to Maggie, and her fear of being sold to the gypsies, the rifle range where Jack and Michael had won two ornaments and the fortune teller’s tent, with Alice and her reluctance to have their palms read. That happy day, when Jack was treated as the local hero and they had said that next year, they would dance together behind the Bowling Green. She had never had sight of Annie since and had only seen Ruthie once, haggling over the price of an article from Lily’s barrow. Maggie preferred to push the pram along the smooth surface of the promenade, so didn’t follow the coastal path where she used to walk before.

She was irritated beyond belief that her widowhood must continue. Alice had decided that the family could only be allowed to watch the Ladies’ Day parade that year. Their relationship was becoming strained, because Mikey had begun to take his first steps and was climbing out of his cradle. Alice had refused to consider a barrier at the top of the stairs, as her lodgers would be inconvenienced, she feared. Maggie controlled her anger irritably, counting the weeks to be got through before Betty and she flitted, then Alice could take all her petty laws and whistle!

The crowd was as large as the year before, even though the sun was staying behind the clouds. Spirits were high and everyone was in holiday mode. When the women of the Ladies’ Club passed by, she could pick out even more of the outfits she had made that year, especially on the daughter of a local alderman, who had decided to follow the very latest fashion, the hated crinoline. The skirt was a cerise pink colour in a zig zag patterned cloth, with a plainly cut cherry bodice, and she wore a dyed pink ostrich feather in her leghorn hat. Maggie had spent many hours on that stitching and winced when she remembered the creating of it all!

A movement by the Brown Horse Tavern caught her eye, not least because standing there was another follower of fashion. It
was Madeline, and with her was a man that Maggie had never seen before. He looked much older than Madeline, at least by a good fifteen years. This must be the uncle that Betty had told her of. Johnny, her husband, must have gone back to sea. From where Maggie stood, she could see a family resemblance and wondered if this man was Ted, Johnny’s brother. He was thickset, with dark, straight hair, and his features were similar to Johnny’s, but not as handsome. She turned away, as a rush of jealousy threatened to engulf her. But why? What did it matter that Madeline was married to Johnny? Men were awkward and stubborn, could be threatening and dangerous when they couldn’t get their own way.

Not all men, though. Michael was gentle and Seamus was a dote, and Maggie’s father had always been kind to her, but Jack had not been everything that a wife could wish for.

Thinking of Jack seemed to have conjured a letter up from him, as a few days later, Alice came up to her bedroom, waving a missive in her hand.

“This has come from the America’s, Maggie. Open it, quick. Must be somethin’ about our Jack!”

Maggie’s heart sank. It seemed there was going to be no getting away from him, and here she was, planning, to move out of his house in a month or so.

“It says it has been written on his behalf, by a scribe named Mr Reilly,” Maggie said, looking at the strange writing closely.

“Dear folks,

We have settled in a place called Evanston, which is a small town outside Chicago. It was a very long journey from New York. Chicago is on the shores of Lake Michigan and has a population around the size of Liverpool. We live in a room above a chandler, but hope to move soon nearer to the city. Lord Belsham came to visit and he has given me a small allowance to help him with his affairs. I know you do not think well of me, but you are often in my thoughts.”

Maggie paused and looked at Alice, who was beaming happily as she listened to the words.

“Is there an address? How did he finish it?”

“There’s no address and he finished his letter by saying, “From Jack, yer son.”

“See, he’s homesick. He’d rather be home with us. I can tell by his letter. If it wasn’t fer that Kitty woman, he’d be home here with us. Still, this letter gives us hope that he might come back one day!”

“So, what will yer say if he does come back?”, Maggie remarked dryly. “That it was all a mistake, that Jack wasn’t buried? He’s bin raised like Lazarus and to our bosom returned?”

“Yes, if I have to,” Alice declared stoutly. “But he won’t, will he? Because he knows you don’t want him and he has to stay there anyway, to look after His Lordship’s affairs.”

Maggie got up quickly, busying herself with Mikey in an effort to keep her annoyance from Alice. This charade was going to blow up in their faces one day. She hoped to be gone and settled in her new life when it did!

Maggie had already chosen a length of material in pearly grey, in readiness for the day when she could throw off her mourning shackles. She was even toying with the idea of making herself a crinoline! The fashion was beginning to catch on, at least with the younger women of the community, and Betty was thinking of taking on an apprentice, someone who was willing to do all the straight stitching of the many layers and hems involved in the making of a crinoline.

“We could do with thinking more of our domestic requirements also, Maggie,” she had said. “I’m not very good at cooking, I left that to my mother and, being a woman on her own, I have usually bought my needs from Ezra, or the bakery. You made a lovely plum pudding at Christmas time. Are you good at savouries and that sort of thing?”

“I’m the same as you, Betty. I can make a simple stew, make a roast, but that is all yer would get if yer left me to the cookin’. I leave Alice to it and the shopping, and the lodgers are always sayin’ what a good cook she is. Perhaps we should ask her to move in with us?” she finished, mischievously.

“No, Maggie, I don’t think so! We will ask Ezra first, if he could ask amongst his customers. Someone might be willing to give us a few hours each day. There’s no point putting a note in his window, because a lot of people aren’t able to read. We’ll ask him to say that Selwyn Lodge is looking for a cleaning woman and a cook and to call in here for an interview. Then, we must think about a nursemaid for Mikey, for you won’t have Alice on call when you move in with me. I was thinking that when he is a little older, we could make that front bedroom into a nursery. Though, it won’t be until I’ve got rid of the damp in that room downstairs. There would be plenty of space for a little bed , wardrobe and a chest of drawers. There’ll be room to play and a bed for the girl who would look after him. That is if she wanted to live in. Maybe, next time I’m in Chester, I’ll look around for a Domestic Agency. They will come with references then. I don’t want just anyone coming in.”