A Time to Love (15 page)

A different woman came home this time,
thought Matthew as he gazed at her across the big kitchen table in Phoebe's home.

Jenny's skin glowed, and her hair seemed shinier. From some Englisch beauty treatment, no doubt. She wore a new outfit, a navy sweater and long wool skirt—at least, he hadn't seen her wear it before. Perhaps she'd brought it from her apartment.

Gone was the wan, too-thin woman who avoided his eyes and touched her hand to her face to hide a scar.

But was it just beauty treatments and new clothes?
he wondered. He was glad she'd said she felt she'd come home. Otherwise, he would have thought she was just looking happy because she'd visited her familiar
Englisch
world and her friends.

She told the children she'd been busy while she was gone and that time had flown. Matthew had never found time to pass so slowly as the last few days. He'd stopped by Phoebe's twice with trumped up excuses just so he could find out if she'd heard from Jenny. And if he was honest, he needed to make sure that she was coming back. Both he and Phoebe knew she hadn't returned for years and years after that last summer. And then she was a pale shadow of herself, a broken shell of a woman.

Now, as he took his youngest from her arms, he smiled at her and silently thanked God for returning her to him.

"It is good to have you back, Jenny."

"It's good to be back."

"I know it isn't New York City, but would you like to drive into town and have a meal tomorrow?"

"I would like to because town is
not
New York City," she said, smiling.

"How about eleven?"

Jenny nodded and then she turned and saw that Joshua and Mary were watching them instead of putting their coats on.

Matthew saw, too, and his eyebrows rose. They quickly donned their coats, but Jenny saw them exchange secret grins when they thought no one was looking.

Phoebe brought a quilt for Annie so that they didn't have to wake her to put her coat on.

"Oh, I nearly forgot," Jenny said, pointing at the package that lay on the table before them. "Here, Mary, would you make sure your Aunt Hannah gets the present I brought for her? Tell her I missed seeing her tonight and I hope she's feeling better."

Matthew settled his children in the buggy, and as he got in, he glanced over and saw that Jenny stood in the doorway. He lifted his hand in farewell, and she waved in return.

When he glanced back as the buggy moved forward, she stood at the window.

Jenny turned back and sank down into a chair.

"Tired?"

She nodded. "It's been a long couple of days."

"Do you want some tea before you turn in?"

"Yes, thank you. That would be so nice."

"Let me turn the kettle up."

Jenny had been tired from the hectic days in New York City when she arrived, but then the children had swarmed out and their welcome had energized her. Dinner with them, with Matthew and her grandmother, had been just what she needed, too.

But she felt she'd been on a roller coaster of emotion. Jenny swallowed and looked at her hands folded on the table.

"And some talk?"

Jenny looked up. "If it isn't too late for you?"

"It's never too late for a talk about a troubled heart."

"Things just seem so complicated sometimes," Jenny said with a sigh.

"Only if you're trying to figure them out for yourself."

"True." She was silent for a moment as she watched her grandmother fix the tea. "Have there been any more visits from Josiah?"

"No. I doubt there will be. Isaac and Benjamin didn't seem to have a mind about things the way he wished they would. I suspect Josiah will just settle down and keep his unhappiness to himself."

Sighing, Jenny shook her head. "Actually, Josiah won't have to worry about me being around for a while."

"But you said you were happy here!"

"I have to go back for a visit in a week or two."

"For another interview?" Phoebe brought the tea to the table and sat down.

Jenny shook her head. "We haven't talked about, because I was in such pain and maybe a little depressed. I just wanted to avoid it."

She lapsed into silence as Phoebe poured the tea. Accepting her cup, she added a teaspoon of sugar and a drop of cream and stirred it around and around, studying the pattern the cream made before it was incorporated.

"You wanted to avoid what, child?"

"The doctors operated on me twice before I came, but they warned me that they needed to do it at least once, maybe twice more."

Phoebe sat down heavily. "I had no idea."

"I wanted to believe that I was healing, that the pain would go away with therapy and time." Jenny stirred her tea. "But I saw the x-rays myself. The doctor wanted me to stay for the surgery."

"You should have called me. I would have come to take care of you after you got out of the hospital."

"I couldn't. I mean, I had to get back here. I'd promised Annie I would return. I didn't want to break that promise. Not with her mother gone. I couldn't do that to her." She pressed her fingers to her mouth to stop it from trembling.

"So you'll stay for a little while and then go back?"

"Yes." Jenny took a sip of her tea.

"Then I'll go with you."

Jenny reached over and grasped her grandmother's hand."Thank you." She glanced around the kitchen. "Maybe I can cook you something in my microwave while you're there."

"Will it be better than your biscuits?" Phoebe asked with a wry smile, echoing Joshua's words.

Jenny couldn't help it. She laughed until the tears came.

"I thought I heard voices."

Jenny looked up and saw her grandmother standing in the doorway of her bedroom. "Oh, I'm sorry, I thought I had the volume low." She tapped a key on her laptop and shut it down.

"It wasn't loud," Phoebe told her as she sat at the end of the bed. She gathered her shawl around her thin shoulders. "So I am not the only one having trouble sleeping?"

Jenny sat up in her bed. "Aren't you feeling well?"

"I'm fine. As I get older, sleep becomes a little elusive at times."

"Maybe I shouldn't have told you about the surgery. It worried you."

Phoebe shook her head. "No. I told you, I try not to worry—"

"Because that means you don't think God's doing His job," Jenny finished for her, remembering her grandmother's words."But this is the first night I can remember you having trouble sleeping."

"Most of the time I don't get out of bed, but I went to the kitchen for a glass of water and heard voices."

She looked curiously at the flat silver-colored box that lay on the bed between them. "You were talking to it?"

Jenny opened the laptop, displaying the interior. "I had to buy another one since the laptop I took overseas vanished from my hotel after the bombing. The battery's going to go out soon since there's no electricity here so I won't be able to use it much longer. But it should last for you to see the DVD."

She popped the disk out of the laptop and showed her grandmother."It can be a movie or just about anything recorded on one of these. This one has the interview David and I did. The staff made this copy for me."

She hesitated. "I wanted to show you what David did but I'm not sure if now is a good time to watch it. Or if it's not too upsetting for you."

"Show it to me. It is important. Besides, it seems both of us are having trouble sleeping."

"Okay." Jenny started the DVD. She found herself watching the play of emotions on her grandmother's face rather than the interview.

"There," Phoebe murmured. "See how lovely you look? Can you see it for yourself now?"

Jenny smiled. "They did a good job with makeup, but yes, I can see that I worried far more than I needed to about the scar."

"David looks so handsome," Phoebe said, seeming as proud of him as she was of Jenny. "He asks good questions."

Then she grew quiet as the clip was shown of Jenny overseas, talking on-camera, surrounded by children and some parents.

"They look so frightened. So hungry," she whispered. "Now I understand why you were so troubled when we talked about them."

Jenny stopped the DVD. "The next part shows the bombing," she told her grandmother. "I don't know if you should see it. I just saw it for the first time, and it was hard to watch."

Phoebe put her hand over Jenny's. "If you could watch it, I can watch it. Remember, David told me enough to know how badly you were hurt."

So Jenny started the DVD again, and together they watched Jenny talking to the children and their parents with the help of the interpreter. Then the cameraman was pulling his camera away from her and focusing on a car that was speeding toward her. She glanced behind her as she saw this, then turned back with an expression of horror. Everything happened so fast, the screaming and the people running and the car exploding and Jenny being tossed into the air and landing like a broken doll.

Phoebe's hand tightened on Jenny's until she thought the bones would break. Tears streaked down her wrinkled cheeks, and she was whispering the Lord's Prayer under her breath.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have let you see it," Jenny whispered, tears running down her cheeks, too.

Phoebe gathered her into her arms. "Truly God was with you," she said.

"Let's not watch any more."

"No, I want to see it all," her grandmother said firmly.

Jenny started the DVD again. Jenny was shown being flown home and in the hospital.

"Look," Phoebe interrupted. "That's my quilt."

Sliding her arm around her grandmother's waist, Jenny smiled. "It meant so much to me. Somehow I knew I would be okay, that I'd be coming here to get better."

The program drew to a close. Phoebe watched intently as the camera focused on Jenny watching the final scenes of the children with tears in her eyes and then letters and phone numbers played across the screen as David spoke.

"It would mean a lot to the children and to Jenny," Phoebe said, repeating David's words. She looked at Jenny. "I knew that David was a good man," she said with satisfaction. "I'm so glad that he talked you into the interview.

"And you—if you hadn't started the work and then done the interview when you were afraid to do it, it wouldn't have happened. Aren't you glad you did it?"

Jenny nodded. "It's all made me feel like I'm on a roller coaster again. My emotions are all over the place. But I think it was good that we did it."

Phoebe seemed lost in thought for a long moment. "When we talked about the children not long after you came here, do you remember what you told me the therapist said?"

Jenny thought back. "She said she'd watched me on television and I—I cared so much about the children. And she said no one else had done what I did. No one had rushed in to do it since I'd been hurt."

"You said that you knew someone would step in, that you were not the first and would not be the last."

"I remember."

"Look what happened today. God is looking out for all His children, even when it seems He is not."

"I remember that you said to pray for the children," Jenny said. "I did."

Phoebe's smile was radiant. "And look what He has already done through you and David."

Jenny felt a weight lifting from her shoulders. "Yes. And now I'm glad it's done. I just want to get my surgery done and get better . . . " she trailed off.

"And see what God has in mind for you for the rest of your life," Phoebe finished for her.

Jenny thought about Matthew and how she felt about him, his children, and the life she hoped to make here.

"I think we should say a prayer to thank Him," her grandmother put in quietly.

Holding out her hands to her grandmother, Jenny nodded."Yes, please."

They bent their heads and gave thanks, and when they had finished, Phoebe leaned over to hug Jenny. "I think we can both sleep now."

Jenny nodded and smiled. "I think so, too.
Gut nacht.
I love you."

"I love you, too."