A Time of Peace (34 page)

They sat around the table talking sadly about the man they had all loved and admired, but Kate hardly heard a word. All she could hear was her tortured mind screaming that the man who had been the pivot of her life was gone! The pain of loss was intolerable.

James stood up. ‘I'll go back to the hospital, Mum, and deal with everything.'

‘Thank you, James.' Rose was looking ready to drop with fatigue and shock. ‘I'll just go and have a rest.'

‘We're going to stay,' Annie told Kate when Rose had gone upstairs. ‘What are you going to do?'

‘I shall move back. I don't want Mum to be alone here.'

‘I was hoping you would do that.' Annie's tears were falling quietly now. ‘I'll stay until after the funeral, but Reid will have to leave tomorrow.'

Her own grief surfaced now. ‘Why did this have to happen?' Kate gasped. ‘He was such a good man.'

‘Yes, he was,' Annie agreed, holding Kate in her arms and rocking her gently, ‘but he was also sick and very tired.'

Kate dried her tears, knowing that however great her personal loss, her father was now at peace.

Jon walked into the shop; he was looking forward to seeing Kate again. After their amicable lunch together and her acceptance of the brief show of affection, he guessed she was beginning to feel more than liking for him. He had stayed away, not wishing to push his company on her, giving her a chance to think things over, and he hoped she would spend more time with him. They needed to get to know each other and he was determined to bring that about, if she would allow it.

‘Hi, Pete, is Kate around?' The expression on Pete's face made his heart leap in alarm. ‘What's the matter?'

‘Her father died yesterday.'

‘Bill?'

Pete swallowed and nodded. ‘He had a massive heart attack.'

‘Oh, my God! Where is she?'

‘With her mother in Roehampton.'

Jon was out of the door and running for the bus – they would be devastated. When he'd realized how much he cared for Kate, he had called himself all the names he could think of for falling in love with her. At first he'd thought he was attracted to her because she was Rose's daughter, but that wasn't true. The feelings he had for Kate were like nothing he'd ever experienced in his life. He wanted to be with her all the time, to touch her, love
her and make her a part of his life. He'd fallen in love with her because she was Kate, a unique personality, funny, sensitive, stubborn and volatile at times, and he loved her deeply. He'd been agonizing over what to do, but this disaster settled it. He wasn't going to leave her now, and he didn't give a damn if she wanted him around or not. He was staying. There was also Rose, and if there was anything he could do for her, then he would. For the first time in his life he was ready to commit himself wholeheartedly.

He sprinted and jumped on a bus going to Fleet Street as it was pulling away from the stop. Once at the newspaper he ran up the stairs to Andrew's office, taking them two at a time. He wanted this sorted out, so he could get to Rose and Kate.

‘Ah, Jon,' Andrew greeted him, ‘had enough lounging around? You can return to Berlin whenever you like.'

‘I'm not going back. In fact, I'm not going abroad again. I want to work in London.'

The Chief frowned as if he couldn't believe what he was hearing. ‘But you're a war correspondent. There isn't a war here.'

He was fast losing patience; he didn't have time to stand around arguing the point. ‘I can bloody well start one if you like.'

Calm down.' Andrew was clearly concerned about his favourite reporter's strange mood.

‘Sorry, but I mean it, I don't want to go abroad again for a while, if ever. I have to stay here. If you don't like it, then I'll find another job.'

Andrew was on his feet in alarm. ‘There's no need for that; you're due a long break. You're the best reporter
I've got and I can find you work in this country at any time.'

‘Good.' Jon glanced at his watch. ‘Why don't you send Mike or Robert to Berlin? I'm sure either would jump at the chance.'

‘You're right, I'll do that.'

He glanced at the time again, anxious to be on his way. ‘Did you know Bill Freeman had a heart attack yesterday and died?'

‘No,' Andrew said, reaching for the phone. ‘That's a damned shame. I'd better tell Joel Perkins, he'll want to know.'

‘I must be on my way. I'm going to see if there's anything I can do for them. We'll discuss my job some other time.'

Andrew nodded his agreement. ‘Tell them I'm very sorry. I only met Kate's father twice but he seemed a fine man.'

Annie opened the door to Jon and she looked so very sad. ‘Hello, come in.'

He was taken into the kitchen, which he had soon learnt was the hub of this house, and was greeted warmly by Reid.

‘Good of you to come,' Reid said.

‘How are Rose and Kate?'

‘They are stunned,' Annie told him, ‘just like the rest of us, but they'll be pleased to see you. They're in the sitting room.'

Jon wasn't sure if he should be intruding on this family's grief, but he felt he
had
to be near Kate and Rose. Both women meant a great deal to him.

When he opened the door of the sitting room and walked in, they were around an open fire talking quietly. The room was very warm, but they looked frozen. He could almost feel their pain.

Rose looked up. ‘Hello, Jon.'

‘I'm so sorry.' The words were inadequate. He didn't know what else to say. ‘I came to see if there's anything I can do for you.'

‘Thank you for the thought, but we have everyone tripping over each other trying to help. They won't let us do a thing.' Rose stood up and tried to smile, without much success. ‘I'll go and get us some tea. At least Annie will let me do that. You talk to Kate.'

He watched her walk from the room, tall, straight, and in control of her emotions. In the circumstances it was an impressive sight. Then he turned his attention to Kate. She was pale, which made the dark smudges under her eyes look like livid bruises.

He knelt in front of her and pulled her towards him. She wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder. She was silent and dry-eyed but accepted the comfort he was offering.

For the moment that was enough for both of them.

It was a wet cold October day. The crematorium at Roehampton was packed with people. Kate was glad they didn't have to stand around a muddy hole in the ground. She couldn't have dealt with that.

Watching the curtains close around the coffin, she felt detached. Her father wasn't there; he'd gone days ago, she was sure of that. What they were doing today was honouring the life of a good man and disposing of the
empty shell. She didn't know why she felt this way, but there was a certainty about this, and it gave a little comfort. Her personal grief was harder to deal with. She kept looking for him, listening for his tuneful whistle, expecting him to be in the kitchen or tending his garden. But he wasn't and never would be again …

After the service they filed outside. The ground was covered with a blanket of flowers, and everyone was looking at them, talking in hushed tones. Kate watched the huge gathering of people; her father had been a well-liked and popular man. All the family were here, including her Uncle Charlie and Aunt Madge, who had come from Scotland, and many friends and employees from Grant Phillips. Sam, Maria and Jacques had come over from France, and Joel Perkins with an elderly couple Kate didn't know. Even Andrew Stevenson had come. She wondered if he had been ordered to attend, but she quickly dismissed that cynical idea. Actually they got on quite well now, and she continued to warm to the man. Pete, Susan, Terry and Beth were also here, having closed the shops for the day. Her mother was talking to the couple with Joel Perkins, and she realized they must be his parents, who had known her mum and dad from a long time ago. She let her gaze roam idly around the scene. Her eyes met Jon's. He was standing a little way off, and she was pleased he was here; he'd been a tremendous support to her over the last dreadful week. She lifted her head and smiled at him; he nodded, returning the smile. Why did he have to go back to his job, she thought. Where would he be going? She knew she would miss him. His quiet strength had been such a help, not only to herself but to her mother as well. Kate didn't want
him to leave, but he never seemed to stay in one place for long, that was the nature of his job. She gave a weary sigh and walked slowly along the rows of lovely flowers – beautiful tributes for a very special man.

The crowds began to thin out. Many were coming back to the house, but those who weren't took their leave of the family and drove away. Her mother, Annie and James came over to Kate.

‘I'm walking back to the house,' her mother said. ‘Do you want to go with James in the car?'

‘No, I'll come with you, Mum.' It was only about fifteen minutes' walk from the crematorium, and it would be good to have a short time to themselves before facing everyone again.

‘I'll come with you as well,' Annie told them. ‘Everything's ready back at the house. The men can look after everyone until we arrive.'

They walked through the gates and up the road, each one lost in the sad realization that the man they loved would not be waiting for them with his usual ready smile. It was going to be hard to live without him.

‘That went well,' Kate said, wanting to break the silence.

‘Yes.' Rose walked slowly, obviously not eager to reach their home. ‘It was good of everyone to come.'

Annie slipped her arm through Rose's. ‘What are your plans, Rosie?' she asked. ‘You're welcome to come and live with Reid and me, or just stay for a while if you want to.'

‘That's kind of you, Annie, but Bill built that house for me and the only way I'm going to leave it is feet first.'

Kate's heart leapt in alarm to hear her mother talk of
dying. She dredged up a falsely bright smile. ‘That's all right, then, because you've got at least another thirty years.'

As soon as the words were out of her mouth she knew she'd said the wrong thing. The look of pain in her mother's eyes was quickly controlled, but Kate had seen it. The thought of spending so long without her husband was like purgatory to her mother. She changed the subject quickly. ‘Who were the elderly couple with Mr Perkins?'

‘His parents.'

‘Oh, it was nice of them to come.'

‘Yes, it was. I'm glad to see they've done so well for themselves.'

Kate knew her mother was just making polite conversation. They had now reached the house and braced themselves to face the next few hours.

At last the house was empty except for Annie and her mother. Kate had found the funeral an ordeal, but her mother's tight control had made her fight to keep the sobs at bay. Silent tears had trickled down her face; she hadn't been able to stop these, and nor had Annie. She knew that Annie had first met Bill when she'd been a young child and had loved him dearly.

‘I'm going to have a rest.' Rose stood up. The front she had erected to get her through this day was starting to disintegrate. ‘I won't want any dinner, Annie.'

‘All right, Rose.'

Kate and Annie watched her leave the kitchen and listened to her slow steps on the stairs.

‘I'm worried about her,' Kate told Annie.

‘So am I, but she's very strong-willed, and she'll eventually
recover.' Annie began to wash the cups and glasses. ‘I just wish she wouldn't keep it all bottled up inside.'

‘But that's the way she is, she's never been demonstrative.' Kate picked up the tea towel and started to dry the dishes, packing them away as she went.

‘That's the result of growing up in the slums, where every day was a struggle.' A brief smile touched Annie's face. ‘You should have seen her then.'

‘But you grew up there as well,' Kate pointed out, ‘and you don't keep your feelings hidden.'

‘Ah, but you must remember, your mum was the eldest in a large family and she took on the responsibility for us. Our mum, Marj, was always too worn out having babies to be able to look after us properly. I was very poorly, and Rosie used to see that I had some treats and a bit of decent food whenever she could get it. She looked after me and protected me from the worst of the squalor and violence.'

‘Violence?' Kate was shocked.

‘Oh, yes, my dad was a brutal man and he didn't like Rose because she wasn't his child. She was the only one with the courage to stand up to him, and if she hadn't we would have ended up in the workhouse. She took some beatings from him.'

‘I didn't know that,' Kate whispered.

‘You wouldn't, she never talks about those days. If it hadn't been for Rosie, I wouldn't be here today, and it was Bill's great unselfish love for Rose and all of us that made it possible for us to leave that disgusting place.'

‘He was a wonderful man.' Kate's eyes misted again.

‘He was.' Annie's smile was sad. ‘And he'll never die while we hold our love for him in our hearts.'

Her aunt was absolutely right and a little of the pain lifted. ‘That's a lovely thought.' Kate hugged her in gratitude. Annie was almost as wise as her mother, but then they had both lived extraordinary lives. And now the funeral was over they must all start to get back to normal – or as normal as possible without her father. He would have wanted that. ‘Is it just going to be us for dinner,' Kate asked her, ‘or is anyone else coming back?'

‘No, it's been a difficult day and we thought it would be better if Rose had a quiet evening. Sam and his family are staying with James tonight; Charlie and Madge are next door with Will and Dora.'

Annie glanced around the kitchen. ‘What are we going to do about dinner?'

Kate was about to say that scrambled eggs on toast would do her when someone knocked on the front door. She went to see who it was and found Jon standing on the doorstep with his arms full of packages. There was a wonderful aroma coming from them and she realized that she hadn't had anything to eat all day.