A Thin Line (46 page)

“No,” Mikala looked horrified.

“He had a similar talk with Richard when he married Dru.
 
Honey, we are all worried about you.
 
Neither of you look happy.
 
You’ve lost weight.
 
Gabriel looks angry all the time.
 
What can we do?”

“Mama, you can’t make him love me.
 
And there are so many complications.
 
I just don’t know if we will ever be happy like you and Papa.”

“Marriage isn’t easy.
 
Your father and I have had our battles, and I am sure you and Gabriel will have many more as strong-willed as you both are.
 
One of you will have to be strong enough to take the first step and admit your love for the other.”

“He won’t do it.
 
I don’t even know that he loves me.”

“Then you will have to be the strong one.”

“I am tired of being the strong one.”

“One more time, love.”

“Mama,” Mikala cried and threw her arms around the older woman.
 
She talked about all her worries and insecurities, including Dru’s suspicions of a pregnancy, until she couldn’t talk anymore.
 
Her mother held her, offered advice and simply told her over and over how much she loved her.
 
Kala felt a peace she had not felt in quite some time.

***

Later that afternoon Kala lay in bed waiting for her husband to come upstairs.
 
Upon her mother’s advice, she had stayed up here and gotten herself under control. Her mother had told her she had to be strong, but she just didn’t know if she felt strong enough.
 
She gently rubbed a hand back and forth over her still flat stomach wondering if she did indeed carry the next Duke of Hawkescliffe.
 
Perhaps she would have a girl just to spite everyone.
 
She didn’t feel quite as scared about the thought of a baby, but still found herself wishing for more time.

The bedroom door opened and quickly shut.
 
Her husband entered, his teeth chattering.

“Those little hellions of Dru and Richard’s.
 
What little snow there is, they packed into balls and would stuff them down our shirts.”

“Did you get them back?” She asked, turning on her side to watch him warm himself in front of the fire.

“No, they’re children.”

“That’s your first mistake.
 
When it comes to a snowball fight, war is declared on all parties, regardless of the age.”

“Well, your father did roll them in it.”

“See, Papa knows how it’s done.”

“I thought perhaps you would come out and play.”

“I started to, but something came up.”

“Kala, why are you in bed?
 
You’re not feeling poorly again, are you?”

“No, just a little tired.
 
Mother and I had a long talk.
 
That is why I didn’t come outside.”

“Did she upset you?”

“No.
 
Everything is more than fine.
 
Why don’t you undress and come to bed and get warm.”

“Supper.”

“They will let us know so we can get ready.
 
I assure you, there are other men in this house getting warmed up as well.”

“Mikala Ann.”

“Well, there are,” she teased, a twinkle in her eyes.
 
She watched in appreciation as he quickly undressed before sprinting across the room to the bed.
 
“You know what my best Christmas present was this year?”

“What?”
 

“My sight.
 
Because now I get to look my fill of you.”
 
He crawled beneath the covers and pulled her into his arms.
 
“My, you are cold all over.”

“Almost all over,” he growled before devouring her mouth.

Chapter 33

The next morning, they left for London after saying goodbye to everyone.
 
The openness of the phaeton made the trip chilly, but also gave the couple a reason to be close.
 
They stopped at an inn midway when an icy rain began to fall.
 
When it didn’t appear to be stopping, they decided to spend the night.
 
There had been a dozen occasions in which Mikala could have told him how she felt, but her insecurities kept getting in the way.

The innkeeper’s wife showed them to their room upstairs.
 
This inn catered to more people than that of the Simm’s, and Mikala found she missed the smaller, more intimate inn.
 
This one teemed with strangers, and while she usually enjoyed meeting new people, she found of late she preferred the company of Gabe alone.
 
Perhaps that would change as their marriage lengthened.
 

“I have decided something has to be done about my mother,” Gabriel began after the innkeeper’s wife left them.

“You have?”

“Yes.
 
She can’t keep harassing my wife and not face repurcussions.”

“She is your mother.”

“She gave me life, but she has never acted like a mother.
 
She passed me off to nannies, governesses, and my grandmother.
 
She never wanted anything to do with a child.”

“I see.”

“I fear her mental stability.
 
I will not see her put in Bedlam, but I will try to find a place where she can live in comfort and not hurt herself or others.”

“Thank you, Gabe.
 
I know that this is difficult for you.”
 
They remained silent for some time.
 
He watched the fire crackle in the fireplace and she watched the people coming and going out the window.
 
“I need you to know that I may have male friends in my life, like Justin and Mack, but that is all they are.
 
Friends.
 
You are my husband.
 
Can you understand that?”

“I think so.
 
I am still not happy about it, but I understand.”

“I also want you to know that I am not Clarissa Blackerby.
 
I will probably never be a perfect duchess.
 
I can almost guarantee that I will make some matron of society angry at some point.
 
I am a hoyden, and I enjoy it.
 
I find that I like society, but I also like spending time in the country hunting and riding.”

“Mikala, I wouldn’t have you any other way.
 
Yes, if we are being perfectly honest, I thought I might marry Clarissa at one time.
 
But there was something very important missing between us.
 
She did not stir the passion in me that you do.
 
You make me crazy at times, but I can’t imagine my life without you in it.
 
If I had married Clarissa, you and I could not have been friends any longer.”

“Why not?”

“I have realized that I could not have stood to see you and then be expected to turn to her every night.”

It was the closest he had come to admitting any sort of feelings for her.

“You would have been bored,” Mikala quipped, attempting to lighten the mood.

“Without a doubt,” he watched her stand and cross the room, walking towards him.
 
“Mikala, I…”

“Shhh,” she reached him, placing her fingers over his lips.
 
“You don’t have to give me what you’re not ready too.”
 
She sat and straddled his hips, her skirts settling around them.
 
She reached between them and he moaned.
 
“I do know something I want that you are more than ready to give me.”

“Mikala, you are my world,” he moaned, before capturing her lips.
 
Kala’s heart tripped a little at the words.
 
He had not given a proclamation of love, but it was so very close.
 
And she realized they had had a conversation that did not result in a fight.
 
They were improving every day.

***

The next day a weak sun shone through the clouds.
 
Deciding to press on while the rain held off, they set off for the last leg of their trip to London.
 
They came to a place where they were forced to take a different route due to a bridge being washed out.
 
The road became rather rough and Mikala had a bad feeling.

“I think we should turn around,” Mikala whispered.

“I don’t like this either.”
 
Gabe stopped the horse and began trying to turn him around when they heard the sound of an approaching rider.
 
She saw Gabe reach for something and he came back with a gun in his hand.

“Well, now, isn’t this a precious sight.
 
The Duke and his whore.
 
I’ll take her now if you please, Your Grace.
 
Me boss and your wife have some unfinished business.”

“I don’t believe so,” Gabe said, easing himself between Mikala and the stranger.

“Be careful,” she whispered in his ear.
 
She felt the weight of the gun as he hid it in the folds of her dress.
 

“Did Dewhurst put you up to this?” She inquired.

“You just shut your bloody mouth.
 
He said I could have a taste of you after he did.
 
We’ll have fun, we will.
 
Your Grace, just leave that gun out in the open that you’ve hidden in the mistress’ skirts.
 
There you go,” he said as Gabriel set the gun on Mikala’s lap.
 
“You wouldn’t want to do anything stupid and risk your life or your lovely wife’s now, would ye?”

Gabe raised his hands, cursing himself for becoming so lax.
 
He should have known that the man would try something when they least expected it.

“As you know, my wife cannot see.
 
Tell me what you want.”

“I already have.
 
Me boss and your wife have unfinished business.”

“I don’t think so,” Kala lifted the gun and shot the man.
 
He screamed and she heard a returning pop sound followed by a curse in her husband’s deep voice.
 
Kala saw the man lying on the ground, blood pouring from a bullet wound in his chest.

“Gabe, are you all right?”

“Fine,” he bit out.

“Gabe, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Have you been hit?”

“Just get me home.”

She put her arms around him and leaned her head against him.
 
She felt something wet on her hand and felt his body stiffen.
 
Kala pulled back and lifted her hand.
 
Red covered her fingers and the coppery smell of blood permeated the air.

“You
were
shot.”

“It’s nothing.”

“Nothing?” She reached her hand up to find the blood pulsing out as his heart beat.
 
“My God, you are losing more blood than a man should.”
 
She ripped her petticoat off and tore it into strips.
 
She made a bandage, stuffing the wound, then she wrapped a strip tightly around it, tying it off.
 

“Pest, you drive.
 
I don’t know that I can control the horse.”

“Should I keep on the way we are or turn around?”

“Keep on,” he rasped.

He began to weave.
 
She propped him up and sat so he was braced between her and the back of the seat.
 
Mikala took the reins and slapped them against the horse’s rump.
 
With every rut they hit, Gabe moaned.
 
The bandage on his shoulder showed bright red with the blood he was losing.
 
Eventually the road joined the main thoroughfare that was clogged with traffic.
 

Mikala had not driven a phaeton in a very long time, and then it had only been twice.
 
She prayed her memory would serve her well and she would get him home in time to receive help.
 
Drivers of larger, heavier coaches yelled at her as she darted between them.
 
Finally, after what seemed forever, Mikala saw Grosvenor Square ahead of them and let out a sob of relief.

She pulled in front of their house and began yelling for help.
 
Hamlin came to the door first, followed quickly by Judith and Sarah.

“Your Grace, what happened?” Hamlin asked.

“We were attacked on the road.
 
We need a surgeon immediately.”
 

“Mikala, where is your husband?
 
He has stirred up quite a lot of trouble with his questions.”
 

“Mack,” Mikala cried.
 
“Gabe’s hurt.
 
He’s been shot.
 
He’s lost so much blood.”