A Thief of Nightshade (39 page)

such an unholy place.”

Given wiped her face on her tattered sleeve and took a moment to look around them. Tears obscured her vision, but in a way, it made the room seem that much more majestic—magical and luminescent.

So much beauty ... so much poison. It reminded her of Nightshade.

Aubrey felt warmth first, then after a few glorious moments, the light seeped into her closed eyelids, along with the realization of what she’d seen last and she finally forced her eyes open. Her vision was hazy at first, but eventually everything took shape. She recognized the bed and decor of the room.

Agincourt.

She struggled to sit up, the pain that she’d felt in her back and limbs had fled, but the throbbing ache in her chest remained.

He’s gone.

She’d seen Jullian crowned the Fae King. She’d lost and Jullian would suffer for the rest of his life because of it. Part of her wished she’d died then ... instead of living through the coronation only to die a painful death knowing she’d failed him.

Stiff and sore, she awkwardly made her way to the window to gaze out at the beautiful world she’d let down—Jullian’s world. She could hear voices, hushed and grave in tone, just outside the door. She listened for a minute or so, but couldn’t decipher the words or who spoke them.

She only recognized one voice.

The door opened and Aubrey heard footsteps, but she didn’t turn around.

“You’re awake,” Aislinn said softly.

“I failed him,” she sobbed. Aubrey hadn’t expected to be so vulnerable, but the grief was more than she could bear.

She pressed one hand against the cold windowpane.

“No,” he breathed. “You have failed no one.”

“How can you possibly say that?”

She felt the heat from his body as he came up behind her.

“You didn’t fail. Besides, isn’t the Prince supposed to do the rescuing?”

“You don’t understand. He did rescue me.” She gazed unerringly forward, tears spilling down her cheeks. “From myself. And from more than he will ever know.” She hesitated before adding, “Forgive me, I know you miss him, too.”

He laughed and the sound of it wrenched Aubrey’s heart from her chest, not merely because she thought the sentiment misplaced, but because more than anything Aislinn had voiced yet, this laugh—tender

and

enchanted—was

uniquely Jullian’s. When he spoke again, it did nothing but further the pain. “You rescued yourself, Aubrey. Your courage and your strength pulled you through everything.” He paused. “I laugh not because I’m amused, but because the depth of your concern for others, despite your own suffering, will never cease to amaze me.” He wiped a tear from her face

with his thumb.

“I suppose I shouldn’t apologize for being emotional, then.” She closed her eyes and bit back a wave of grief as she recalled the conversation she’d had with Jullian in her car so long ago.

Leaning in so close Aubrey could feel the kiss of his breath on her hair, he whispered, “You aren’t the emotional type, Mrs. Sellars.”

She opened her eyes as she turned around.

“You thought I was Aislinn, didn’t you? I have to admit, this isn’t the only time we’ve taken advantage of the fact that we sound a lot alike.” Jullian closed the distance between them and took her face lovingly in his hands.

He smiled. “I will never deserve you; not the sweet glances you send my way when you think I’m not looking, the kisses you plant on my cheek when you think I’m asleep, or the way...” he choked on his words, the feelings he’d been holding at bay since he’d walked into the room suddenly overwhelming him, “or the way you turn into my touch. But, Aubrielle Sellars, I am hopelessly yours.”

He kissed her then; sweetly at first, savoring the gift that he’d been so certain that he’d lost forever, but the delicate brush of his lips against hers grew strong and fervent as he felt her sob against him.

There had been so many times that he’d wished she would let her guard down, let him in, but he couldn’t have imagined what the sound of her sorrow would do to him. He’d never been so honored, yet so heartbroken.

Jullian picked her up and sat on the window seat, his back against the wall, Aubrey held tightly to him. And they remained there, in tender silence, for a long time.

“We’ve got a lot of decisions to make,” Jullian said.

Aubrey shifted to look up at him. He was unsettled by the weight still evident in her expression and the fact that she didn’t reply.

“I wouldn’t obligate you to anything you wouldn’t want, so I waited to accept anything, but how do you feel about the

title of Queen?” He smiled, wondering what she’d say to this, but instead of answering him, Aubrey looked away.

He cupped her chin and turned her face. “Love, as long as you’re beside me, nothing else matters. Whatever decision you make ... really, I’m fine with. I can step down and hand the crown over to Aislinn. First he’ll have t—”

She wondered why Aislinn and the others hadn’t already told him. “It’s not that,” she said. “I was poisoned...”

The concern in Jullian’s eyes faded.

“The Time Wraith. I’m sorry. I should have told you first thing.” He laced her fingers through his and kissed her hand.

“Tabor ... gave up his immortality. It was the only way. But, by doing so, you’re now tied to Avalar as one of her own.” He let go of her hand and placed his own over her heart. “Unlike me, the Lyr now means life to you, as it does all magical creatures here. I don’t know how to tell you this, sweetheart, but this means we can’t go back home. Not permanently.”

“Why would Tabor...?” The very idea, already more than she could fathom, and the joy she felt at knowing she would live, got all tangled up with the guilt and the sorrow of never seeing her family again.

Jullian sat up and hugged her, smoothing her hair with his free hand.

“Sssh, sssh, honey.”

That’s when she realized she was crying again. She’d once feared that she would never cry again and now she feared she’d never stop.

“Sweetheart. Tabor said no greater honor could exist than to grant life back to the one who’d freely sacrificed everything of herself to save Avalar—a world that had nothing to offer in return.” He paused, likely to give her time to say something in response, but she still couldn’t find the words. “I have so much to ask forgiveness for. I was too afraid to tell you the truth, afraid that you wouldn’t believe me and that if you didn’t—”

“I don’t know what I would have said had you told me before. They declared you dead, Jullian, held a funeral.

I didn’t know what to think. I left after the graveside service and went to the cabin, alone. I sat on the dock and somewhere beneath the pain, something in me believed in a world that I had no proof of.

If that isn’t real, utter faith, I don’t know what is.”

Jullian considered this. “There are so many things I want to show you, places here that I would never had imagined I’d be able to tell you about, let alone show you. We still have so much rebuilding to do and some of the lords have started to fight over deeds settled by the Fae ages ago.”

“Avalar will heal. Give it time.

There are a few places, while we’re working all of this out, that I would very much like to avoid.”

“Oh?” Jullian asked smugly.

“I think your first act as king should be the abolition of one Crimson Stair.”

The look on Jullian’s face was priceless. He cleared his throat before responding. “Aislinn failed to mention that part of your journey. Is that where he ran into Rustin?”

“Yes. He said that Rustin ... did you consider him a friend?”

“Classmates, yes, and companions, perhaps, in childhood. Ash always had a higher opinion of him than I did. You know how it is; Rustin was big brother’s friend. That garnered him cool points that he wouldn’t have had otherwise.”

“Yeah, I know exactly what that’s like.” While Aubrey’s heart ached for the family she’d come to take for granted, she had Jullian back. And she could think of nothing more in Avalar, nor any other world, that she would want more. “So, we really can’t go home?”

“No, I’m sorry ... not fully.”

“What does that mean?”

“I’ll have to show you. Remember that thing I kept telling you about emotions and how they carry over?”

Aubrey nodded.

“Even though I didn’t know who I was, my heart still knew and I think my subconscious reached out to you while I slept. I didn’t remember the dreams when I woke up, but now that I’m in full charge of my mind, I recall everything. I—”

“Yes! I heard you call my name once.

So, I’ll be able to let them know I’m okay.”

“Yes. And since you’ll be aware of what you’re doing, you’ll be able to say more than I could. But, there’s a catch.”

“Isn’t there always?”

“You’ll probably have to go through the kids.”

“They have to believe in magic, don’t they?”

“I’m afraid so. But you never know ... grief makes you do and believe strange things.”

She snuggled closer. “That makes me feel a little better.”

“They will be all right, sweetheart. I promise.”

“By the way,” Aubrey said, “I could do without ever even hearing the name Koldavere again.”

Jullian kissed her on the top of her head, a grin on his lips. “Oh, I doubt you will. I hear Cedrick has his hands full these days. I don’t think we’ll be hearing from him any time soon, what with the latest statue in his collection. Besides, I’ve made a monumental mistake that will take tremendous time and concerted effort to make up for.”

Aubrey looked at him sideways.

“I believe, being a Prince and all, that I was supposed to wake you with a kiss. I guess we’ll just have to do everything over again so I can get it right.”

“Sure, that’s sounds like a plan. I’ll just be on my way back to the ocean and wade in a few yards, so...”

Jullian shushed her with a finger on her lips. “No, no.” He stood up with her in his arms, laid her back down on the bed and covered her with the quilts. “Let’s just

start with the part where you’re supposed to be asleep and go from there.”

Aubrey gave him a wicked grin, before closing her eyes and reveling in the warmth of his kiss.

Given looked so beautiful it hurt. She stood on the balcony with her back to Aislinn, her long strawberry blond hair moving with the wind. Then again, everything of Aislinn’s hurt at that moment.