A Simple Faith: A Lancaster Crossroads Novel (37 page)

“I guess it’s time to get my snow leopard on the road,” Haley said.

As Elsie followed her into the main room with the little cap in hand, she couldn’t help but smile. That was who she was, deep in the core of her heart. The one who could see good in everyone. The person who saw the silver lining in a dark storm cloud.

She gave a happy sigh, so relieved that her sunny disposition was
coming back. Ya. If little Tom was still fussing, she would find a way to turn his frown upside down.

That night, after everyone else had gone to bed, Elsie added one last batch of coal to the stove as Fanny finished nursing the baby.

“Now it’s time to sleep, little one.” Fanny ran a hand over her baby’s downy head.

“Gott has blessed us today.” Elsie had stayed up to keep Fanny company, and to hold the baby one last time before going off to bed. If Tom was going to be the only babe in her life, the child of her heart, she wanted to make the day of his birth last long in her memory.

Fanny let out a yawn as Tom’s little rosebud mouth sucked at the air, then settled.

“Can I hold him a bit?” Elsie asked.

“Sure.” Fanny placed her warm bundle in Elsie’s arm. “I’m off to bed. You can bring him in to the cradle in my room when you’ve had enough cuddling.”

Elsie looked down at the sleeping baby, his perfectly formed nose shining in the dim light. “I don’t know that I’ll ever get enough of this little one.”

With a chuckle, Fanny headed off to the washroom.

As Elsie settled into a slow, steady rocking pattern, she began to hum. Before long, she realized it was a song she had loved since she was a child, called “I Have Found a Hiding Place.” As a small girl, skilled in the game of hide-and-seek, she had thought the song was written for her.

She sang softly as her mind painted a warm, happy future for the little baby in her arms. Outside, something rattled against the front window. The wind must have been kicking up the snow, but they were safe and warm inside.

A clatter outside the window caused her to abruptly stop singing.

“Don’t worry, Tom,” she whispered to the sleeping baby. “It’s probably just a branch blowing in the snow.” It was hard to see anything with the curtains drawn over the window to keep the draft out. But as she rose and crossed the room, baby in her arms, a bouncing light made her heartbeat quicken.

That was not the wind.

With Tom cradled in her arms, she parted the curtains and peered out. Someone was out there with a flashlight; a young man who’d come courting, despite the snow. For a moment she expected it to be Gabe King, here for Emma, but as she made out the dark silhouette, it was too large to be Gabe.

“Ruben?” she called through the glass.

With one hand he turned the flashlight on himself, hitting the snow from his hat with the other hand.

She tapped on the glass, then pointed toward the side of the house. “Go round to the mud porch. I’ll meet you there.”

Had he really come all this way in the snow? She hadn’t heard his horse and buggy come down the lane, but then snow tended to muffle noises in the night.

She checked the sleeping baby in her arms, then walked through the kitchen. A cold draft swept in as she opened the door to the
mud porch, where rows of socks hung from a line like sleeping bats. She cradled the baby closer for warmth, but he breathed quietly, unfazed by the cold.

Ruben was huddled over by the hat rack, knocking snow from the shoulders of his coat.

“What are you doing out in the deepest snow of the winter?” she asked.

“I hope it’s all right. I wanted to tell you how the auction went, and besides that, it’s Saturday night.”

The night when young men courted their girls … was that what he meant?

As she looked up at his broad, kind face, she couldn’t deny that she was overjoyed to see him on this night of all nights. In the past few months, Ruben had been at her side for nearly every important moment, sharing in the sadness and healing. She wanted him to be here, to have a peek at Tom, to tell her about the auction and keep her company by the warm stove.

And there was still the matter of that wonderful kiss from last week. That spark that still lingered in the air between them.

Just the thought of it set tender emotions trembling through her.

But there would be no kissing tonight … not with little Tom nestled in her arms. Tonight was a night to celebrate a gift from Gott. A night for celebration and friendship.

He looked up as he stepped out of a boot. “Is that the new baby you’re holding?”

“It is. Tom Lapp.”

“Praise be to Gott. But shouldn’t he be asleep?”

She chuckled softly. “He is asleep. That’s the joy of being a baby. You get passed from one set of loving arms to the next, and you settle in and go back to sleep.

“Kumm,” she said, leading him inside after he had left his wet things on the mud porch. “You can warm up by the stove.”

“Denki.” He followed her inside, stepping right up to fold down the blanket at Tom’s chin and study his little face. “
Wilkommen
, little man. You’re a lucky one to be in Elsie’s arms.”

His words, his presence, the twinkle in his blue eyes—everything conspired to warm her from within. “Do you want some hot cocoa?”

“That would hit the spot. The snow is already thick out there. Like slogging through a bucket of flour.”

Elsie turned to the kitchen to prepare the hot drink, then paused. She didn’t want to jostle the baby too much. “I need to put you back in your cradle.”

“Here.” Ruben motioned her closer. “Give him to me.” Without a moment’s hesitation he reached out and gently lifted little Tom from her arms. In Ruben’s large hands, Tom looked like a tiny little doll, but from the way Ruben cradled the baby in the crook of one arm, Elsie could see he had experience with babies.

“You’ve been around little ones,” she said.

“Ya. Our family is still growing. Little Perry is only a few months old.”

Ruben didn’t talk about his family often, and she had forgotten that his father, like her dat, had taken a younger bride after being widowed.

She watched as he lowered himself into a rocker by the stove and gently shifted the baby, supporting his head. Oh, he was good with babies. The sight of him talking softly to Tom tugged at something deep inside her, something that had been long buried, tucked into a secret hiding place.

There’s no reason to doubt that Elsie will be able to have healthy babies of her own
, Doc Trueherz had told her and Fanny years ago, when she had gone into the clinic for a throat infection that had turned into a physical exam.

And Fanny’s smile had cast a gentle shower of grace over Elsie. “That’s good news. There’s nothing more important in this world than having a family of your own.”

A baby of her own … that would be heavenly. A toddler tugging on her skirt. A little Ruben tracking mud into their house. Although she didn’t want to admit it, she had fallen for Ruben … fallen hard. And the thought that he might one day be her husband, sitting beside her at the family table, sharing a bed … oh, that would truly be a life of happiness.

Another glimpse of Ruben rocking the baby, and Elsie wanted to cry out for the terrible unfairness of it all.

It could never be … not for her.

She turned away quickly and tugged the refrigerator open, trying to push such thoughts from her mind.

As she heated milk on the stove, he told her about the fruitful day at Zook’s barn. “You saw the turnout. There were a lot more Englishers than we usually see in Halfway this time of year.”

“Such a crowd.” She stirred the milk, careful not to stare at the lovely sight of the big, sweet man holding her little Tom.

Ruben explained that some of the handmade and rare items had fetched high bids—including her family’s wooden box. But there had been other creative donations. The Fishers had auctioned off a day of baking, and Dave Zook agreed to give a tour of his buggy shop, along with a ride in a real Amish buggy. By the end of the day, Mary and Remy had counted receipts of more than twenty-three thousand dollars.

“That’s wonderful for James and his family.” Goose bumps tickled the back of her neck at the wonder of it all. That daunting mountain of debt would be gone! When Gott took a family in His loving arms, He truly did move mountains.

“I knew our Plain folk would pull it together for Jimmy Lapp
and his family.” Ruben lowered his head, as if speaking directly to Tom. “This is how we do it, little man. You must follow the Golden Rule and love your neighbor as yourself.”

“That’s a good lesson.” With a tender smile, Elsie brought the warm mug of cocoa over to them. “But it might be a little early for Tom, being just a few hours old.”

“It’s never too early to learn Gott’s goodness.” Ruben spoke directly to the sleeping baby. “Am I right?”

Tom simply turned his head and nuzzled his little nose into the soft blanket.

Every little movement the baby made stole Elsie’s breath away. She put the mug down and held her arms out. “I’ll take him while you drink your hot chocolate.”

“Back to Elsie you go,” Ruben told the sleeping baby.

As she dipped her hands into the warm crook of his arms, her skin tingled from brushing against his sleeves. Such a wild, warm sensation! It happened every time he touched her.

Suddenly warm and content, she settled onto the sofa across from Ruben and thought what a pretty picture they made, the three of them warming together by the stove. Soft light playing on Ruben’s face. His words falling over her like gentle snowflakes.

The only thing that could have made things more perfect would have been if the baby were theirs.

41

T
he glow that surrounded Elsie tonight, like an angel’s halo, was an answer to Ruben’s prayers. Every night, he’d been getting down on his knees, praying that Gott would give him the words to convince her that she had made the wrong decision, that she had to give him a chance to be in her life, beside her, forever and for always.

The need to persuade her had consumed him for most of the week, distracting him when customers were telling him stories or during those stretches when he was alone in his buggy, letting his horse take him down the open road.

It wasn’t the sort of thing he could bring up at home with any of his brothers, who would laugh at him or tease him for liking a girl. And he’d thought about telling Amos at church last week, but the young man who shared his place on the outside of the Amish youth group had been sick with the flu.

Oddly, the only person Ruben had been able to talk with was
the last person Elsie would want him spilling the beans to. But Preacher Dave was the easiest member of the clergy to talk with. He wasn’t so quick to pass judgment like the bishop. Besides that, he was Ruben’s uncle, so Dave and his family were often over at the house, visiting.