Authors: Rosalind Lauer
“I work for an ob-gyn now,” Judith went on, “but I was a midwife for a few years.” She let out a small laugh. “The hardest four years of my life, but also the most fulfilling.”
Their eyes met, and Meg nodded. “I’m hooked.”
“I sensed that about you.”
“I’m glad to be able to practice again. But I’ll never forget this case. I’ll never forget Deedee’s baby when I saw him at the hospital. Even stillborn, he was …” Meg’s voice cracked with emotion. “He was perfection.”
Judith bit her lower lip, nodding. “I lost a baby, too. It did me in. I was never able to go back to being a midwife with the same confidence. I admire you for getting back on that horse.”
“Like I said, I’m hooked.”
They were in the lobby now, lingering by the elevator. Judith
opened her arms wide and folded Meg into a warm embrace. “Good luck to you, Meg. Go forth and bring lots of healthy babies into the world.”
Meg hugged Judith, taking her words as a mission. A responsibility. A prayer.
SEPTEMBER
S
uch a sight! Remy King sat beside her sister-in-law Mary, each woman cradling a newborn in her arms. Fanny leaned back against the kitchen counter and clasped her hands together, delighted to have helped deliver both these babies. Last week she had spent a good day helping Mary Beiler and her husband, Five, give birth to their first, a boy named Nathan, and now today, Remy and Adam’s baby, Esther, had come into the world, blinking her eyes and screeching like a little chipmunk. Named after Adam’s mother, Essie was a feisty little thing!
Doc Trueherz had made it to the house in plenty of time to take care of the hard part. Dear Remy had pushed for so many hours, she was about spent. But Fanny had made up some herbs to give her strength, along with a light snack of toast and cheese to give her
a boost, and that seemed to do the trick. Remy, who had been so pale during labor, now sat smiling with a pink radiance on her cheeks.
Adam King nodded at his wife and sister, who had become best friends over the past two years. “Now we’ll never be able to separate those two.”
Fanny and Doc Trueherz laughed along with Adam, who could not take his eyes off his wife and child. The two young mothers sat side by side on the daybed in the King kitchen. Each woman’s face glowed with love as she spoke gentle words to the infant in her arms. The room was filling up with family, who gathered round to coo over the new arrivals.
“I wish my parents could have seen this day,” Adam said wistfully. “My dat would have been all smiles.”
“And your mother would have been delighted,” Dr. Trueherz said. “Esther loved babies.”
“But Gott had other plans.” There was no bitterness in Adam’s voice; only a touch of sadness for the parents he’d lost nearly three years ago. This family had seen difficult times, especially that first year after Levi and Esther King were killed. But their passing had brought oldest son Adam home from rumspringa, and in a turn of events that surprised most everyone in these parts, he had fallen in love with an English girl who turned Amish, Remy McCallister. She had been a reporter of some sort, but she’d been willing to give up her job and her car and belongings to live Plain. Adam and Remy married and took charge of the household with seven young children left behind. And now, praise be to Gott, Remy and Adam had added a new baby to the King family.
Although Fanny hadn’t known Levi and Esther King well, she had mourned their deaths along with the rest of the community. After such a sad time, it made days like this all the more festive to see the family growing. It reminded Fanny that she wasn’t the only
one to have lost people she loved dearly. Most everyone had come across a sad patch in their journey, but a person had to keep on going down the road.
“Babies, babies, everywhere!” Adam’s teenage sister Susie clapped her hands together in glee.
Little Katie climbed up on the daybed and leaned over Remy’s arm to peer into the bundled cotton blanket.
“Say hello to the new baby,” Remy said.
Leah, Susie, and Ruthie leaned in close, cooing and chattering, while Gabe and Jonah teased Adam about too many girls outnumbering the boys in the house.
“I’d better get going,” Doc Trueherz said, tucking his stethoscope into his black case. “We need to pace ourselves, Fanny, with three more due in the next week.”
“Mmm.” Fanny pursed her lips, not wanting to speak of such things in public. Indeed, September had brought a rash of births—seven already, and the month wasn’t even over yet. “It’s too much for one woman to handle,” Anna had told Fanny two weeks ago. Fanny had been delighted to be a midwife for half the women on Anna’s list. It was wonderful to be present with each new miracle. Fanny would have offered to help Anna years ago, but back then she thought the older woman wouldn’t want a newcomer like her taking away business.
“These two will enjoy playing together,” observed Leah, Susie’s twin.
“They’ll be close, getting to spend so much time together,” Fanny agreed, looking up at the clock. Nearly three
P.M.
If she left now, she would be home in plenty of time to prepare some supper for her family. It had been wonderful good having Emma at home during the summer, but now school was back in session, and all three of the older ones spent their days at work. The evening meal had become one of Fanny’s regular chores, and she enjoyed cooking
for her family and checking in with Zed. Often, after she popped a casserole in the oven or gathered vegetables from the garden, she would go out to the carriage house and talk with Zed, admiring the progress he’d made that day or talking through possibilities for the renovation.
“I’d best be going, too,” Fanny said.
“I’ll go hitch up your buggy,” Simon offered, ducking out the door. A true horse lover, that one.
“Can I get one of you big, strong men to carry my black suitcase out to the buggy?” Fanny asked.
“I’ll do it,” Gabe said, darting into the other room to get the case of medical instruments and supplies. What a good young man he was, strong and quiet, but a little wild and fun-loving at times, which was what Tom’s daughter Emma needed.
Fanny went to say good-bye to the new parents. Adam and Remy wanted her to take some cookies, and the children wanted to give her apples and cheese and rhubarb from the garden. She agreed to take some cookies for the children and cheese from the King dairy, but left the rhubarb, telling them she had a garden full of it.
Outside the stables, her buggy was waiting with Flicker hitched up. But instead of Simon, Gabe stood there rubbing the horse’s neck. At nineteen, he was a tall young man, and in his black pants and blue shirt, he looked like he could use some meat on his bones. Fanny would have Emma find out what he fancied so that she could bake him something tasty.
“You got my bag all tucked away?” Fanny asked.
“It’s in the back.” When Gabe faced her, she could tell he was skittish. His Adam’s apple moved up and down as he swallowed nervously, turning away to cough.
“Are you all right, Gabe? Having trouble with allergies?” Why would Gabe be nervous around her? She had known this young
man for many years, even before he had started courting Emma. And by the time he became Emma’s beau, she and Tom were very comfortable with Gabe.
“Friends first,” Tom had once said of Emma and Gabe’s relationship. “Emma and Gabe will be a very good couple, because they started as friends.” Fanny remembered exactly where they were when they had that conversation. She and Tom had been in their room on a Saturday night, preparing for bed, when they’d heard the clip-clop of a horse’s hooves receding down the lane—a telltale sign that Gabe had just left with their eldest daughter. “Emma was a sympathetic ear for Gabe when his parents were taken,” Tom explained. “That’s a solid foundation for good things to come.”
“Is that how you courted me, Tom?” She had removed her kapp and unraveled her braid, leaving waves of brown hair spilling over the bodice of her white nightgown. “You gave me work when I needed it, a chance to take care of three wonderful good children, and while I had my guard down, you showered me with kindness and love and became my best friend.”
“Oops! Now you know my secret. But the kindness came first.” He came up behind her and pulled her against him, one arm around her growing waist, another sweeping the hair from her neck so that he could plant a kiss there. “The love came later.”
Pushing back the intimate memory, Fanny drew in a breath to clear her head, and the pungent smells of fresh hay and manure reminded her she was standing outside a stable, and she was supposed to be calming a nervous young man. “What is it, Gabe? It can’t be all that bad, now.”
“It’s been eating at me for a while.” He took off his black felt hat, raked back his gold hair, and then replaced the hat. “There’s something to ask you, and it’s a rough question.” His gaze finally rose to meet hers, and in that moment, her breath escaped her because she knew.
He would be asking for Emma’s hand in marriage, and the question would open a wound that had been healing ever so slowly. The pain of losing Tom but eight months ago was still fresh at times. Although Fanny knew he was gone from this earth, there were still times when she mistakenly thought she might find him at home, or when his words and laughter came to her so vividly, she found herself answering him. Of course, she knew Gott had taken him. She remembered that every day.
“You know I don’t mean any disrespect, Fanny. You lost your husband and Emma lost her dat, and there’s nothing I can say to ease the pain. But Emma and I want your permission to marry in November,” Gabe said solemnly. “Now that I’m baptized, we’re both in good standing in the church. The bishop says there’s nothing to stop us, but we want your permission, Fanny.”
Her heart was beating so hard, she could hear the rushing sound in her ears. “You want to marry
this year
?”
He nodded solemnly, swallowing hard. “I know it’s soon after her dat’s passing, but wedding season comes but once a year, and we’re ready to marry now.”
“Not even a year. November won’t be a year after Tom’s death,” Fanny said, thinking aloud. She didn’t mean to blurt it out, and she didn’t mean to criticize Gabe, but a year was the usual mourning period for family members. The girls were still wearing black to church, and Fanny wore her black dress every day. It was still a time of sorrow, and a happy event like a wedding would feel wrong when the heart was still swollen with grief.
“Aw, Fanny, don’t look at me that way. This is a good thing, Emma and me. We want to be man and wife with Gott’s blessing, but we want your blessing, too.”
The initial shock wore off, leaving her in a daze. “A wedding … in two months?” It wasn’t nearly enough time to plan such a big event, and Fanny couldn’t imagine herself or any of her children
rising to the occasion with their hearts so burdened with grief. “There’s not enough time to put together a reception.”
“We can have it at our farm, and we’ll rent a wedding wagon, like Adam and Remy did. But don’t worry about those things. We can pull it all together. Just as long as you think it’s still respectful to Tom.”
Her eyes stung as tears threatened. How could this wedding possibly be respectful to a man who had passed so suddenly just months ago? She could not tell Gabe what he wanted to hear.
“Can you wait until next year?” she asked again, her voice hoarse with emotion.
“We can wait, but it doesn’t seem right to us.”
She turned away from him and climbed into the buggy. “Give me some time to think about it. A week.”
A week to think of a kind way to let you and Emma down easy
.
Gabe nodded. “A week, then.” His eyes watched pensively as she called to the horse and looked toward the highway.
Biting her lip as the buggy rolled down the lane, she took in a deep, ragged breath. It was only when she reached the end of the lane with the shelter of trees and bushes behind her that she let the first sob rush from her throat.