A Shadow Bright and Burning (28 page)

“Yes, nearly. Next time we speak, I may be one of Her Majesty's sorcerers.” I laid my hand on the door, imagining I could simply melt through the wood and into the room.

“You'll have the life you always should have had.” It sounded as if he was describing that life without him.

“You'll come with me, Rook. We're going to get control of this.”

“Yes.” He didn't sound convinced. If only I could see him.

“I'm sorry for what happened.”

“So am I. I didn't want to hurt anyone.” He sounded afraid. “That's all I seem to do now.” There was a moment so silent I thought he'd ended the conversation, but then he whispered, “Is anyone nearby?”

“No. What is it?”

“What Mr. Magnus said about…was he telling the truth?”

I closed my eyes and leaned my forehead against the door. I could just lie to him. “Yes,” I whispered.

“Oh, I see,” he murmured. I could almost sense that he'd put his own forehead against the door, much in the same way. I looked down and found his shadow stretching into the hall, reaching for me. With a gasp, I pushed away. “I'm sorry,” he cried. The shadow slunk back under the door. There was a weak thump, as if he'd beat his fist against the wood. “I'm trying so hard.”

“Rook.”

“Be careful tonight. My scars hurt again.” With that, I heard him move away.

The carriages drew up through the gates and into an enormous courtyard. They delivered us before the palace, white and elegant in appearance, like a wedding cake. Red-liveried guards stood at attention. A wigged footman ran to our carriage and lowered the step. I dropped to the ground and gazed up in wonder.

“Come along,” Blackwood whispered.

They announced us into a ballroom shining with candles and chandeliers. I waited on Master Agrippa's arm, as frightened as I'd been the day we'd faced the Familiars on the hillside. They announced the Duke of Buckingham, Lady Evelyn Rochester, and then:

“Master Cornelius Agrippa and Miss Henrietta Howel.”

As we descended the stairs, I heard whispers passing among hundreds of people, with so many eyes on me. The gold filigree caught the light and glowed as I moved through the crowd.
It looks like fire,
I realized. Eliza had been cunning in her choice of dress. I kept my face an indecipherable mask, just as Blackwood had instructed. Eventually, the rest of the boys joined us, and Agrippa excused himself to discuss something with the Earl of Southampton.

“You feel it, don't you?” Dee whispered while elegant men and women glided past, their eyes sweeping over us. “The whole of society is going to pay attention now, notice every little thing we do.”

“I thought you'd be better adjusted to the idea.” I wished I had a spell that turned me invisible.

“No, I don't really like London. If I had my way, I'd go back to my grandmother's estate in Lincolnshire and just worry over the cottages and the gardens. I'm not much for society. Not like Magnus.”

Indeed, Magnus appeared completely comfortable with a glass of punch in his hand. He laughed and flirted with a young woman in a white dress—yet another conquest—and I looked away.

Eventually, Dee and I were dragged into conversation with Palehook.

“We expect the pleasure of your abilities soon, Miss Howel. I believe the war shall run smoothly with you officially on our side.” Palehook didn't smile. I noticed that he appeared sallow and sweaty. He coughed a good deal, and his eyelids were swollen and rimmed in pink.

“Are you well, Master Palehook?”

“I've been unwell. Thank you for inquiring. I believe it may have something to do with how much energy I spend in maintaining the ward. Korozoth, you know, exhibits such a forceful attack.”

“The ward is growing thinner, isn't it?”

He smiled thinly. “It's through no fault of mine, I assure you.” Dee went to get some more punch. I seized my opportunity.

“Why haven't you informed all the Masters about Lord Blackwood?” I asked. That certainly surprised him.

“Has Lord Blackwood made mention of our disagreement?”

“He's told me everything. What are you planning?”

“Nothing.” He held out his hands in a gesture of giving. “His secret is safe with me. I confess I nearly did tell, but it occurred to me that if his secret is known, he's out of my power. Now my power is greater than before.” He smiled. “Don't you think?”

Hateful man. “What did you want with Rook?”

“I applaud it, my dear. Your devotion to one so disgustingly low.” Before I could respond, he bowed and disappeared into the crowd. I had to breathe slowly to avoid going up in flames.

The dancing began. Magnus came to me as Dee and I stood on the sidelines, contented to remain observers for most of the ball. “Would you join me in the first waltz?” he said, bowing. I wanted to strike him. I wanted to tell him to leave me alone, but tonight I also wanted as little trouble as possible. There were too many watchful eyes in this ballroom. Besides, I couldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing me that upset.

“Better you than me,” Dee said into his glass. “I'll surely be a laughingstock the moment I dance my first step.”

So I took Magnus's hand, and we turned onto the floor. We orbited each other, our hands arched over our heads, and then we folded together and spun, the lights and the people a blur around us. His dancing was perfect. Of course it was.

“Are you ready?” he whispered.

“Yes.” I made my voice as stiff as I could.

“For God's sake, I'm sorry. Can't you forgive me?”

“No,” I said. If I counted to ten, I could avoid getting angry. He gripped me tighter about the waist and pressed me as close as he might dare while we danced.

We applauded the musicians when the waltz ended.

“I don't imagine that you want any refreshment,” Magnus muttered.

“No.”

“I must say, it's staggeringly mature of you to answer me with one word at all times. ‘Do you agree, Miss Howel, with Plato's concept of knowledge as recollection?' Yes. ‘And how would you go about describing it?' No. ‘What is your favorite color?' Maybe.”

“I'm more than ready for my commendation. It means my time with you will be coming to a merciful end.” We were snapping at each other now, and a cluster of young girls with fluttering fans noticed and giggled.

“Where will you go once you're commended?” Magnus said in a low voice.

“I'm not sure yet, but I'll think of something. Rook will come with me.”

“Yes, of course, mustn't forget dear old Rook. Also mustn't forget his powers of eternal night and nameless horror—that's a
very
good trick for parties.” He paused, then said in a less angry tone, “You need to be careful around him. Something terrible might happen.” As we neared Dee, he whispered, “Despite what you may think, I do care what happens to you.” He swept back into the crowd in search of a new partner.

Blackwood and I took to the floor in a quadrille. He was a skilled dancer, elegant and nimble. The dance also gave us an excellent chance for conversation.

“What did you talk about with Palehook?” he asked as we made a turn.

“Your situation.”

“And?” He had to wait for us to circle back to each other.

“You're safe,” I whispered. “I think you'll have to do something about it one day, but for now you're safe.” After a few more turns, the music ended. The dance was done.

“I didn't know how lonely I was,” he said as we bowed, “until I had you on my side.” We left the floor together, his hand on my back.

After that, we waited with Dee until Agrippa came out of the crowd. He clapped for the music and nodded to me.

“It's time, Henrietta. The queen will see you first.”

“Shouldn't we all go in together?” Dee said, putting his glass down.

“Henrietta is a special case. Come, my dear.”

“In fifteen minutes, it will all be done,” Blackwood said.

I took Agrippa's arm and walked toward my destiny.

We entered a long receiving chamber. Gentlemen milled about, some in army uniform, others in fine dress. I recognized Imperator Whitechurch, who watched me with an unreadable expression. The men parted and formed an avenue toward a great throne, where Queen Victoria sat.

Lord, she was only a girl, scarcely older than I. She was pale, almost sickly, her dark hair curled in fashionable ringlets, her tiny hands clasped in her lap. She wore a rich blue velvet gown and a great diadem upon her brow. I took a card with my name on it to a gentleman in a powdered wig waiting near the throne. He handed it to the queen. When she nodded, I curtsied before her. She extended her gloved hand, and I kissed it.

“Your Majesty. I am your humble servant. I seek your royal commendation to take up arms against England's foes and to defend Your Majesty's life with my own.”

“Thank you, Miss Howel,” she said, her voice soft and high. “We are most pleased by your presence. They tell us you are to be a weapon in the war against our aggressors. We dearly hope this is true.” She glanced at the army of men stationed around her throne, as if checking that she had done right. How must she feel, receiving requests and demands from these much older gentlemen day after day? I felt a brief and bizarre kinship to the queen.

With her permission, I entered a circle of seven polished stones set on the floor. Agrippa came forward as a servant brought me my stave. I'd been forced to leave it with my cloak at the entrance.

The servant moved to a long table laid by the side of the room, took up a silver bowl filled with water, and placed it before me.

“Now is the time of judgment,” Whitechurch said, his voice rising over the crowd. “This young woman comes to be commended in our most sacred and ancient arts. We shall see if she is worthy.”

Agrippa whispered, “Water first.”

With the correct stave movements, I brought the flowing circle up around my body and transformed it, from water to ice, to sleet, to snow, to rain, and then to the three different variations of attack. I delivered them all perfectly.

The queen leaned forward.

I took a large rock, broke it into sand, brought it back together, broke it again into sixteen pieces, arranged and rearranged those pieces into different orders, and then bound the rock into a neat little wall. I created the spinning vortex of flame, flew around the room five times before creating a column of wind to escort me slowly to the floor, and warded Her Majesty's spaniel so that no man could reach him (slightly to Her Majesty's terror). The queen seemed beside herself with delight. Once I'd freed the dog, she cuddled him like a schoolgirl, giving no thought to her regal appearance.

At last, the time had come for the column of fire. This was what the gentlemen and the queen most wanted to see, my singular ability to help defeat the Ancients. With a sweep of my stave I rose into the air, where I went up in a blaze of blue flame. The men gasped. The queen clapped her hands wildly. I unfolded my arms and hung there in pure triumph. With a thought, I brought myself to the ground, extinguished, and curtsied. My breathing was deep and my muscles ached, but I felt glorious.

The crowd went wild with excitement. Even the Imperator smiled, nodding slowly. The queen seemed eager to leap to her feet and applaud, checking about the room to see if anyone would mind. The air hummed with victory. I was a sorcerer. I had done it.

Then, from the back of the room, came a slow, deliberate clap. Palehook pressed forward through the collection of men.

“What an extraordinary talent Miss Howel possesses.” He smiled.

“Thank you.” I tensed. What was he doing?

“Shame, really. Such a shame.” He shook his head.

“What is?”

“That you've lied to all of us.”

The room broke out in murmurs. The queen looked confused.

“What are you talking about?” I said, attempting to keep panic out of my voice.

“Explain yourself, Master Palehook,” the queen said.

“Our prophecy calls for a female
sorcerer,
Your Majesty, not a female
magician.
”

“What?” I cried. God help me, I would not faint. The queen rose from her throne.

“How can she be a magician? She couldn't have been trained. Such a practice was expressly forbidden by my uncle, King George.”

The Imperator signaled to Agrippa, his face white with shock. “Sir, explain this insane accusation.”

Oh, thank heavens. Agrippa would sort this out. I was almost dizzy with relief.

“Every word is true, Majesty, Imperator,” Agrippa said, without looking at me. “Her father was a Welsh solicitor named William Howel, a magician. He also possessed the ability to burn without harm to himself. He passed the talent to his daughter. She is a magician, nothing more.”

It sounded as if the shouts and cries and questions around me came from deep underwater. I should have raised my voice along with the rest, but I couldn't breathe. When I called Agrippa's name, he turned his back. That was the gesture that almost broke me.

Keep the pain down,
I thought, forcing myself not to wail.
Fight now, hurt later.

“How can a sorcerer train a magician?” the queen said.

“That is not possible.” The Imperator's stunned look turned to anger. “Our approach to magic is entirely separate and impossible to reconcile. You should not have been able to train her,” he snapped at Agrippa.

“It was deceit, sir. She let me believe she benefited from my teaching, but she sought out a magician who could help her perfect her abilities in an effort to pass as one of our kind.”

Then I understood what was coming. The guards placed along the walls rushed me when I took a step out of the circle. I thought of fighting my way out, but if I got past the men, there were always Agrippa, Whitechurch, and Palehook to deal with. I was trapped.

“Who on earth trained her?” the queen said, her frustration apparent. As if on cue, a door at the far end of the room opened. Two guards entered, and between them, they half dragged a ragged, stumbling man.

“Howard Mickelmas,” Agrippa whispered. Men shouted in fear. The queen shrieked. The Imperator stood before Her Majesty, his stave in hand in case a battle broke out.

“You bring that
thing
into our sovereign's presence?” he cried.

“You have nothing to fear from me, Majesty,” Mickelmas said. His right eye was swollen, and there was a long, ugly cut on his forehead. “I've come to confess.”

“Confess what?” the queen said.

He took a deep breath. “That Mary Willoughby and myself were responsible, solely responsible, for the arrival of the Seven Ancients. That I've hidden for many years when I should have accepted punishment for my crimes. And,” he added, looking at me, “that I have trained this young woman to be a servant of darkness. I've trained her to use her powers to fool you, gain commendation, and destroy the royal sorcerers from the inside, all in the service of the Seven Ancients, my true masters, long may they reign in chaos and in blood.”

“He's lying!” I screamed, my voice ringing off the walls. The guards caught me. Stretching out my hands to him, I cried, “Master Agrippa, tell these gentlemen the truth.”

Agrippa turned away from me again.

“Your true master has confessed, girl,” Palehook said. “It's cowardice not to admit your treason.”

This worm wanted to lecture me on cowardice?

“Bastard!” I pulled away from the guards and thrust Porridge forward in some vain attempt at a spell. Palehook had his stave, though. He struck me with warded force, and I collapsed. A guard ripped Porridge out of my hands.

“She attacked,” someone murmured. Two of the queen's guards seized me and pulled me to my feet. Another guard stood before me, saber in hand.

“If you even think of putting yourself on fire,” he said, pointing the saber at my chest, “I will run you through.”

Agrippa came out of the crowd. His eyes glinted with tears.

“She is not a sorcerer. I've been training a magician all this time,” he said. Shamed, I sought out Mickelmas. He was only standing because the guards held him upright. They'd tortured him into saying this.

“Your Majesty, my lord Imperator, they're all lying to you!” I cried. Everyone in the room regarded me with a cold, unfriendly eye. Five minutes before, they'd been delighted. The shame was unbearable.

“God help her,” Agrippa said.

“What I don't understand,” the queen said, shaken, “is why you brought two
magicians
before me in such a way. How dare you risk my—
our
—safety.”

“Indeed,” the Imperator said, his voice icy.

“The fault is mine, Majesty, Imperator.” Palehook bowed to both of them. “We only discovered this yesterday. Miss Howel is a cunning creature and had kept herself from detection for so long. Poor Cornelius went along with my suggestion. He could think of nothing else on such short notice.”

The queen sighed. “In the future, Master Palehook, you will not raise our hopes before deliberately dashing them. Guards, take Miss Howel down and confine her. We shall decide what's to be done.”