A Promise to Protect (Logan Point Book #2): A Novel (29 page)

Whatever happened to honor among thieves? And how did Gresham know about the company? “What do you want?”

“A bigger cut. Fifty percent.”

“Fifty percent? No way.”

“Seventy-five, then.”

“What? You’re crazy.”

“That’s a possibility. I’m tired of doing all the dirty work, and you getting the biggest part of the money.”

Gresham leaned over the desk, and stale sweat assaulted Armero’s sensibilities. Did the man never take a bath? The old man pointed his finger in his face.

“You’re going to let me into that offshore account, and I want half of the money you collect. Starting with this shipment. And there’ll be no quitting. At least until
I
say we quit.”

Armero narrowed his eyes at Gresham. His mind raced, trying to find a hole. He wasn’t giving Gresham half. He’d die first.

Or maybe Gresham would die.

F
orgiveness. Since church this morning, Ben hadn’t been able to get the word off his mind. Even the chatter and laughter around the table hadn’t been enough. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to forgive himself for Tommy Ray’s death. He couldn’t.

Forgiveness was way more complicated than the pastor indicated.

Ben pushed away from the table that Sarah and Leigh were already clearing. The boys had disappeared, probably into the living room to play one of their video games. He glanced out the dining room window. The skies had cleared.

Leigh reached over his shoulder for his plate. “Finished?”

Her voice soothed the jitters in his stomach. “Yeah. Would you like to walk down to the lake with me?”

He’d give anything to recapture what they’d had last night at the top of the Ferris wheel—if it had actually existed. But it was like everything that had happened before the boys’ kidnapping didn’t exist. Did he imagine that she was receptive to his kiss? And where did he want to take his feelings for her? After all, she was leaving in six weeks.

She glanced down at her clothes. “How wet is it outside?”

Emily passed by. “I have something that should fit you upstairs. A pair of sneakers too, if you wear a size 8.”

“Thank you.” Leigh held up her index finger. “Be right back.”

“I think I’ll change into something old too. Meet you outside.”

The white pea gravel crunched under their feet as they walked in silence. Leigh seemed preoccupied. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea.

“Do you have any leads on who kidnapped TJ and the twins?” she asked.

“I’m afraid not. The only fingerprints inside the van belonged to the driver. The boys did remember the man wore rubber gloves, but they didn’t think anything about it.”

“Was TJ the target?”

“I think I was the target,” Ben said.

“But the phone call . . .”

“He’s trying to hurt me by targeting the people I’m sworn to protect.” He heaved a sigh. “But whoever is responsible will make a mistake. He’ll get too cocky.”

“I hope you catch him soon, but until then, I’m keeping TJ close. Emily said I could bring him to the clinic. I think she’s bringing the twins with her when she’s there.”

Frustration boxed him in like iron bars. He needed a break in this case, evidence against Jonas Gresham—if he was the one. Maybe now that Dad was getting better, he could talk to him. Ben dismissed that thought immediately. His father wasn’t that much better. Ben hadn’t even brought up the shooting yet, for fear thinking about it might cause his dad to have another stroke.

“Hey!” Leigh stood in front of him and waved her hand in his face. “We came out here to relax. Let’s try to do that before we have to face reality again. Why don’t we take the paddleboat out?”

“Nah.” The sun glinted off the white fiberglass craft tethered to the pier. He hadn’t been out on the lake since Tommy Ray. “There’s a shady place around the bend. Let’s walk.”

Fifteen minutes later, Leigh panted beside him. She wiped her face with the tail of her shirt. “Are we there yet?”

“Five more minutes,” he answered with his standard reply to the twins. “Just around this next bend.”

Sure enough, five minutes later, they reached the shady spot he’d promised and flopped down on a patch of grass under a water oak.

Leigh fanned herself. “The breeze feels good.”

“I didn’t remember it being so far over here.” Ben plucked a blade of grass and chewed on it, savoring the green taste. “I’m glad you came for lunch.”

She breathed deeply, not answering.

“Were you surprised that Dad was so much improved?”

“Oh yeah. I had no idea he’d come that far. Did you see the look on TJ’s face?”

“Yeah. Wish I’d had a camera.”

She fell silent again.

“Thanks for helping out in Sunday school this morning. In fact, you can take my place until Jeremy comes back, if you’d like.”

“What? You don’t like helping?”

“Sometimes it’s hard.”

“How hard can teaching nine- and ten-year-olds . . . oh.” The laughter died in her voice. “They remind you of Tommy Ray. But I thought he was older, fifteen.”

He nodded, not sure if he could trust his voice not to break. It’d been three years. He should be able to put it behind him. He grabbed a breath of air. “I’m not comfortable around kids of any age, but if they were fifteen, I don’t think I could do it at all.”

She put her hand on his arm. “Look at me a minute.”

He turned his head. Her emerald green eyes had darkened.

“Did you not hear anything the pastor said this morning?”

“I don’t need to forgive anyone.”

“Ben! You’re beating yourself up for something that wasn’t even your fault. I wish Sarah was here. She’s so much better at this than I am.” She licked her lips. “Do you believe God has forgiven you for what happened that day?”

How could God forgive him? A boy had died. A family suffered.

“Wait, before you answer that—exactly what do you believe needs to be forgiven?”

That was an easy question. “I was responsible for those boys. I should have known he wasn’t horsing around. And when I did realize it, I should’ve gone in the water right away.”

“Did you do what you were supposed to do?”

Go into the water only
as a last resort.
The words had been drilled into Ben’s head from his first lesson as a lifeguard when he was a teenager. So what if he followed protocol. It didn’t ease his guilt. Ben closed his eyes, reliving the horror. “We were so close to making it. I tried to capture his arms. I couldn’t breathe.”

He sucked in a deep breath, then another. “He let go of me, and I knew if I didn’t get air, I’d die. I shot out of the water and grabbed some air and went back down to find him, but he was gone.”

He balled his hands so tight his knuckles hurt. “I keep replaying what happened, looking for a different answer. One where I wasn’t a coward.”

Leigh took his hands and gently pried his fingers open. “The instinct to survive is the strongest instinct we have. You are not a coward. Look at how you raced into our smoldering house to get TJ. That’s not the act of a coward.”

He
had
saved TJ. Hadn’t thought twice about what to do, either.

“You can second-guess yourself for the rest of your life, and it won’t change anything. I don’t think there’s anything God needs to forgive you for, but if there is, he did it a long time ago. Now it’s simply a matter of you receiving his grace.”

Forgiveness seemed so close, almost like he could reach out and touch it.
“You killed my
boy. Let him drown.”
Jonas Gresham’s bitter words echoed in his mind. “Not everyone feels that way.”

“Ben, you’re the most caring, courageous man I know.”

Leigh’s passionate words branded his heart. He could almost believe her. He could certainly believe he might be falling in love
with her. But what if she took off again? There was no what-if—she was taking off, to Baltimore. “Are you still leaving in September?”

She bent her head, studying something in the grass. When she looked up, uncertainty clouded her eyes. “Sarah wants me to stay here. She says I don’t have to go to Baltimore to make a difference.”

“She’s right, Leigh.”

“TJ doesn’t want to go, either. But I’m not sure it’s an opportunity I can turn down.” She picked up a stick and drew a stick figure in a bare patch of ground. With a shake of her head, she pierced him with her gaze. “Let’s talk about something else.”

Even if she changed her mind, Ben wasn’t sure he could trust her. She’d left him before with little explanation. She might do it again. “What happened ten years ago? I never understood why you wouldn’t take my calls.”

The color drained from her face. “W-what?”

“Why did we break up? I never knew why. Oh, I know what you said, that you were going to med school and couldn’t afford the distraction of a relationship, but I never thought that was the whole story. We could have made it work.”

She pressed her lips together. “That’s water under the bridge.”

“But I need to know what happened or it might happen again. It really hurt when you left.”

Leigh shot a skeptical glance his way. “It doesn’t seem like you were hurt to me. When I came back for my grandmother’s funeral, you were engaged.”

Gabby Jordan. His heart winced. What a mistake that’d been. “Rebound. Then she lied to me about something insignificant, and we broke up. I can’t deal with lies.” He looked into her green eyes, and it was like gazing into her soul. “You were always truthful with me.”

Leigh fanned herself furiously with her hand. “It’s hot. I think it’s time to go back.”

“So you’re not going to tell me what happened to us?”

She stilled her hand. “We were in different places in our lives. I still had a lot of years of school. You needed a wife who would be an asset in your life, not someone who had been hauled into the county jail with a bunch of strippers. How would that look on an election poster?”

“Leigh, that was when you were seventeen and look at you now. You’re a doctor. And totally an asset.”

She turned her gaze toward the lake. “It was a summer romance.”

“I didn’t think of it that way. I wanted to marry you.”

“But you never told me that.”

“Then I’m telling you now. I wanted to marry you then . . . and . . . and I want to marry you now. Or at least explore the idea, see if what we had is still there.”

Her mouth dropped open. She clamped it shut. “Everything is different now. I have a child, and you don’t want the responsibility of children.”

A band constricted his heart. Tommy Ray’s face flashed in his memory. Could he take that responsibility? Suddenly, TJ’s sooty face overrode the memory of the drowned boy, and the band loosened. “I know you and TJ come as a package deal.”

“Well, don’t get too excited about it.”

“You know I like being around TJ.” He gazed into her green eyes. Just being around Leigh calmed him.

“Ben, I don’t think—”

“I care about you, Leigh. I’ll care about your son.” He took her hand and ran his thumb over her palm, not expecting the tremor that raced through his heart.

Her pupils widened, and a look he couldn’t discern flashed across her face.

Leigh bit her bottom lip. “There are some things we need to talk about first.”

She looked so kissable. He was done with talking. “Mmm-hmm.” He leaned toward her, and her lips parted as he cupped
her face in his hands and drew her to him. He kissed her gently, and electricity charged through him. “I need you in my life,” he murmured.

“Oh, Ben . . .”

She closed her eyes, and he kissed them as well. When he trailed his finger down her neck, she opened her eyes, and he lost himself in a sea of green. With a groan, he wrapped her in his arms and pulled her close, capturing her lips once again. Leigh’s arms slid around his neck, and she pressed against him, returning his kiss with a passion that surprised him.

When they parted, he brushed a strand of chestnut hair from her cheek. She stared at the top button on his shirt, and he lifted her chin. “You look mighty serious.”

A soft sigh escaped her lips. “There are still things I need to tell you, but not today.”

Lightning zigzagged across the lake followed by a clap of thunder, and he stood and grabbed her by the hand, pulling her up. “Good. We have to get out of here,” he said, pointing toward the building thunderheads. They would be lucky if they made it back to the house without getting drenched.

The frown faded, replaced by wide eyes. “Oh, my!”

Hand in hand, they raced for the house. Whatever she wanted to tell him would never change the way he felt about her.

Two hours later at the house on Webster, Leigh tossed the wet clothes Emily had loaned her into the washer and turned it on. Part of her wished she’d gotten it over with and told Ben the truth. If Tom knew, it was just a matter of time before he would be able to speak well enough to tell the whole family what he suspected. Ben needed to hear it from her first.

Wait . . . maybe she could talk to Tom, convince him to keep quiet. Or maybe she was imagining he knew. Besides, Ben wasn’t
ready to be a father. That was evident. He wanted her, but he’d been less than enthusiastic about a relationship with TJ.

Hadn’t he said he couldn’t deal with lies? His actual words echoed in her heart. Once he discovered she’d lied to him all these years, he would reject her. Which meant he would reject TJ as well. That was not happening. No one was rejecting her son.

And how about TJ? Didn’t her son deserve to know the truth? Pain gripped her stomach, and she doubled over and sank to the floor. Tell him or don’t tell him? The decision went back and forth.

She pulled herself up from the floor. Why did truth have to be so hard? And what good would it do to tell the truth? Why stir up trouble when in six weeks she and TJ would be out of Logan Point? They could start over, but not if she told the truth and they had to take all that baggage with them.

No. This truth would only hurt those she loved. She squared her shoulders. She would not tell Ben
or
TJ. And maybe, someday, there would be a man in her life who could love her and her son. Actually, Ian already seemed to enjoy TJ, and that was at least a start.