A Promise of Fire (22 page)

There’s a subtle increase in the pressure around my wrist. I jerk my eyes up. “I was saying I’ll enjoy feeding your eyeballs to Cerberus one of these days.”

Griffin’s mouth twitches. He lets me go.

I don’t rub my wrist. I
refuse
to rub my wrist.

“Do you need us both?” Kato asks.

Slowly, deliberately, Griffin turns to him. “Why do you ask?”

“Someone should stay with Cat.”

Griffin’s eyes spark dangerously. “She can handle whoever hit her.”

“Someone should still stay,” Kato insists.

Griffin sweeps me behind him, his voice dropping to a low growl. “Why? Do you want it to be you?”

Kato glances at me. I shake my head. Our exchange is subtle, but Griffin still notices. His hands ball into fists. He looks ready to use them.

Flynn mutters something unintelligible and steps between them. “Because she screams bloody murder every night and is terrified of being alone.”

My jaw drops. “Flynn!”

Griffin gives me a sharp look. “Why haven’t I heard about this?”

“You saw for yourself,” Kato says. “Before we got here.”

Griffin frowns, shaking his head. “It happened a few times. Not more.”

Flynn sighs. “That’s because she was almost always with y—”

I dart around Griffin and punch Flynn in the kidney. He grunts and stops talking, but it’s too late. Everyone knows what he was going to say. Griffin looks nauseatingly gleeful, and every member of his family suddenly has a hideous gleam in their eyes. I hate them all.

Well, maybe not the girls.

Or the parents.

Or anyone, really.

Gods! What is
wrong
with me?

Piers, who rarely speaks or pays attention to the usual bickering says, “She can stay in the castle.”

I groan. “We just had this conversation.”

“If you have nightmares, you can stay with me,” Jocasta offers. “My bed is big enough for at least four Flynns.” She glances at the auburn-haired warrior and then blushes kalaberry red.

“No.” I shake my head, turning to Griffin. “I could kill her before I even woke up.”

“Stay in my room.”

“What? No!”

His generous mouth lifts in a sly smile. “See if it helps.”

“Absolutely not!”

“It wasn’t a request.”

“You don’t own me!”

His voice deepens, making me shiver. “Ownership isn’t what I’m after.”

“It’s useless,” I croak. “Give up.”

Griffin pins me with a steady gaze. “Never.”

My insides somersault, drop, and combust.
Never give up on me? Does he mean that?
“Why? I’m not that pretty, I’m a huge pain in the ass, and people around me usually die.”

Griffin laughs, and right then he’s so compelling, so utterly unafraid of all the things that terrify me, that I want to jump on him and kiss him until my lips bruise.

“You think I’m kidding?” I demand. “You. Will. Die.”

“Worried about me?” He winks, and I see red. “And Cat? Modesty doesn’t suit you. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

My jaw goes slack. My whole body does. Did he really just say that? In front of everyone? “Y-You’re delusional,” I sputter. “And I’m staying in the barracks!”

Griffin turns to his brother. “Piers! If Cat hasn’t moved into my room by tomorrow night, you will forcibly remove her from the barracks and bring her to the castle. Is that understood?”

Piers nods and then goes back to the scroll he couldn’t put down long enough to finish his dinner.

I’m stunned. Discussion over.
Again
. “How do you know I won’t incinerate him if he touches me?”

“I trust you,” Griffin says.

Those three words squeeze all the air from my lungs. I don’t deserve his trust. “Why?”

“Because I want to.”

“That’s idiotic!” I cry, ready to pull my hair out and wail. Protecting this family is going to be like trying to stop a Cyclops with nothing but a stick.

“Don’t leave the castle grounds while we’re gone,” Griffin says.

“Where do you even think I’d go? I’m bound to you for the rest of your life!”

“Just while we’re away.” His hands circle my upper arms, his eyes darkening with concern. “Promise, Cat. Please.”

Something in his tone annihilates my need to be stubborn. This time, anyway. “Fine. I promise I won’t leave unless there’s a dire emergency.”

“At all,” he grates, giving me a little shake. “I won’t leave the castle
at all
.”

“
Unless
there’s a dire emergency. If everything is burning down around us, or we’re under attack, do you really want me physically incapable of leaving this place?”

I can tell by the way his mouth flattens that he hadn’t thought of that. “Unless there’s a dire emergency,” Griffin concedes, giving me his hard look as the vow jolts through me, brutally taking hold. “And our definitions of ‘dire’ had better be the same.”

I get up before dawn and stumble into Flynn’s room, rubbing my eyes. “Don’t do anything stupid,” I mumble sleepily. “Like die.”

He nods gravely, tying the straps on his leather bag. “I’ll scratch that off the list, then.”

I grunt. “How long will you be gone?”

“Not more than a week, probably less. Ios isn’t far, and Griffin and Egeria have to concentrate on the realm dinner next.”

Queasiness slithers around my insides at the thought of all those nobles here. I’ve been describing their magic and lineage for the family. I know of many of the people we’ll see, even though they’re Sintans and I’ve never met them in person. “I can’t believe you told Griffin I don’t have nightmares with him.”

Flynn shrugs. “It’s true.”

“He just snores so loudly you couldn’t hear me screaming.”

“Nice try,” Kato says, coming in behind me. He musses my loose hair, and I bite my lip, feeling empty and sad. The circus made me soft. Being here is making me something even worse—emotional.

Unable to shake the ache in my chest, I lay my head on Kato’s arm, feeling his biceps roll under my ear.

“What’s wrong with you?” Flynn peers at me with a frown. “Are you sick?”

I sigh. “I’m being left behind.”

“Plan something unpleasant for Daphne,” Kato suggests. “It’ll keep you busy.”

Of course they badgered her name out of me. “I think I’ll destroy Griffin’s room with the sword he bought me, make him regret forcing me in there.”

“Maybe you should hold off on the fits of martial irony,” Flynn suggests. “You’re only staying there while we’re away.”

I’m not sure any of us fully believes that. I’m scared to death Griffin is going to come back from Ios and somehow convince me to stay. Andromeda would merrily dismantle him piece by piece if she ever thought I needed him. She’d move Mount Olympus to get her hands on him, carve him up, and serve him to me for dinner. She’d probably call him Sintan Steak and present a slab of meat on Fisan pottery with a sprig of rosemary and my favorite crispy potatoes. I don’t think she’d expect me to eat. She’d smile like a knife’s blade and tell me the fun was in the cooking.

We make our way to the stables. I help Kato and Flynn saddle their mounts, my job mostly consisting of patting noses and sneaking apples to the horses from a barrel across from the stalls. Griffin shows up for Brown Horse and readies Egeria’s mare as well. Carver appears last but makes up for lost time by being efficient. Panotii looks as grumpy as I do about being left out.

“We’ll have our revenge,” I whisper into one of his donkey ears. He nudges my shoulder like he understands. Then again, he might just want another apple.

A few minutes later, I find myself staring in confusion at the empty courtyard. The only thing out here besides us is the statue of Athena glowing in the first rays of the morning sun, her toes polished to shining by the adoration of men. “Where’s Egeria’s entourage?”

Griffin leads Brown Horse behind him, the stallion’s shoe irons clip-clopping on the marble, his hot breath chuffing as he senses a run. “We’re her entourage.”

I groan. Apparently, I need to be more proactive in my role as advisor, but I thought this was common knowledge, or at least common sense. “She’s
Alpha
. She shouldn’t travel without part of the army, at least ten attendants, and a few maids.”

Griffin’s expression turns mulish. “She doesn’t need attendants and maids. That’ll only slow us down.”

“It’s not a question of need. It’s a question of appearance. You want healers to take you seriously. They won’t listen to Egeria unless they think she’s a force to be reckoned with. They respect power.”

“Power isn’t about being ostentatious. It’s about results.”

I shake my head. “Not only. Not for them.”

“Egeria will convince them.”

He either has too much faith in Egeria, or too much faith in human nature. Probably both. “They’re not reasonable. They’re attention-hungry sycophants. If they don’t think Egeria will last, they won’t give her the time of day. They’ll look for someone else to flatter and fawn over and get rewards from. You’ll have a mass exodus of healers on your hands. They might all just pack up and go to the other realms, back to royals they understand.”

“Capricious rulers who would as soon kill them as reward them?”

“Yes.”

His eyebrows lift doubtfully.

“You have limited experience with healers because they shun Hoi Polloi and the south. But you have to understand, the ways of millennia aren’t easily changed.”

The hand resting on Brown Horse’s muscled neck balls into a fist. “How can people be so blind?”

I shrug. “Don’t overestimate the masses. They love you until they hate you. They hate you until they love you.”

“Healers aren’t the masses. There aren’t even that many of them.”

“It doesn’t matter. The principles are the same.”

Griffin slowly exhales, uncurling his fist. “How do healers function in Fisa?”

“They need Andromeda’s permission to lift a hand, let alone heal someone. They’re all confined to Fisa City.”

“And how many people needlessly die because of that?”

Brown Horse flaps his lips against my palm, searching for an apple. I give him the last one I have with me. “A lot. People send requests by dove all the time, but they’re rarely answered, even for powerful nobles.”

Griffin looks incredulous. “And you see merit in that system?”

“I never said that. Just don’t expect people to change overnight. It takes more than a few months to unravel the traditions of the realms.”

“I don’t want to unravel the traditions of the realms. Only the asinine ones.”

“Good luck with that.” There’s no sarcasm in my voice.

Kato and Flynn pat my head before they mount, Carver promises me a sword fight when they get back, and Griffin sweeps me into his arms and kisses me in front of all three of them. He lifts me to my toes, and I forget to kick or punch or scratch, or even breathe. When he lets go, I come to my senses enough to cough out a “Yuck!”

He grins. “Keep telling yourself that.”

Egeria flutters into the courtyard, looking unused to traveling. I don’t do anything ridiculous like wave good-bye, but I watch them go, not liking what I see. Four men and a woman. No escort. The majority of the population is firmly on their side, but we’re in the northern half of Sinta now, and there are more Magoi around. They might try to cause trouble. And danger can come from anywhere, even accidents. If something happens to them, Sinta loses Alpha, Beta, and Delta. There’s a good chance the realm would fall to pieces. Without Griffin holding things together, I doubt there would be anything left.

Feeling anxious, I return to my room, pack, and wait for breakfast. Cook still gives me a spice cake, but it’s tasteless without anyone to share it with. I have nothing to do—not today, not tomorrow, not for days. Since there are already dozens of children waiting at the castle gate, hoping for their chance at clothing and food, I find Piers and manipulate him into asking me to oversee street urchins for another building project. I reluctantly agree to his request, casually suggesting something that’s been on my mind for days. Since I can’t leave the castle grounds, I’ll have them shore up the north wall on the far side of the woods. One good hit with a battering ram and a whole section would fall to bits.

Ordering starving, homeless kids around isn’t nearly as much fun as I thought it would be. They can’t work properly until they’re stronger, so I arrange for a picnic instead. Nerissa, Jocasta, and Kaia come out of the castle despite the heat. We stuff the children until their bellies are round and then coax them into playing blindman’s bluff in the shade. In the meantime, soldiers bring in rocks from the quarry. Daphne is with them. Her nose is still swollen, and she’s sweaty and dusty and hauling rocks she can barely lift while I play court games with the royals. I feel her loathing like a beetle crawling on my skin.

She doesn’t understand. This is my place in life, and for the first time, I don’t hate it.

* * *

I lie down in Griffin’s bed for the third time. His crisp, masculine scent still lingers on the sheets. The shallow dip in the mattress is the imprint from his body, fitting around me like an embrace. I haven’t had a nightmare once.

I hate this.

I hate needing him.

I squeeze my eyes shut.
She’ll kill him.

They’re in Ios without me, a full day’s ride to the east. Today, they probably discussed strategies, scribbled building plans on scrolls, and argued about how to recruit healers. The healers probably watched from nearby, wondering and gossiping about the new royals, and deciding not to help them. Until one of them does. Then the rest will follow. They’re fickle but predictable.

I’m staring at some clothes Griffin left over the back of a chair when there’s a knock on the door. I get out of bed, pull on a lightweight wrap because the former princesses’ nightgowns are so sheer they’re practically see-through—scratch that, they
are
see-through—and answer the door with a knife in my hand.

Jocasta doesn’t even blink. She’s getting used to me. I set down the knife and motion her inside.

“Am I bothering you?” she asks.

“Not at all.” In fact, she just saved me. I was about to wrap myself in Griffin’s tunic. It still smells like him, like salt, citrus, and sunshine. I know because I stuck my nose in it once already.

“I wanted to ask you something.” She shifts, hesitant, her bare feet sinking into the flokati rug, and then shivers.

I climb back onto the bed. Jocasta follows, and we curl our legs up under us. I drag the blanket over our laps for her sake, because I can tell she’s cold.

“Is it about Flynn?” I ask.

Her head jerks up, and she blushes uncontrollably.

I knew it!
A girl doesn’t know her bed is big enough for four Flynns without having thought about him in it.

She worries her bottom lip, her cheeks an alarming shade of pink. “Do you think he’s noticed me? I mean, I know he
knows
me. But has he
noticed
me?”

I don’t really know. I’ve only seen them in the same place twice. They probably had a lot more interaction before, when they were both just part of a tribe.

“I think for the moment, he notices weapons, and war, and women he doesn’t intend to marry,” I answer honestly.

Jocasta sighs, and her eyes drop.

“He’ll help me with the north wall when he gets back. Keep coming for picnics. He can’t miss you then.”

She looks back up. “All right. But do you think it’s even possible? Before, I was just a warlord’s daughter. Or a warlord’s sister. Now I’m Epsilon Sinta, and he’s a soldier.”

“He’s not just any soldier. He’s Beta Team.”

“Like you.” She looks hopeful, and I understand why. Griffin’s made no secret of his interest in me.

“If I were really Beta Team, I’d be in Ios.”

“It’s not like that,” Jocasta says. “Griffin just wants you to be safe.”

“I’m either part of the team, or I’m not.”

Her eyes widen. I sound like a wasp, only I’m the one who’s stung.

“Maybe he thinks you’re more useful here. It’s not just about what you want. It’s about what’s good for the realm.”

I snort. “You’re all so idealistic. It’s nauseating.”

She frowns. “Do you really think that?”

“No,” I reluctantly admit. “It’s actually kind of nice, as long as there’s strength behind it. If there isn’t a driving force, there’s chaos. The realm dinner will be the test of that. Everything could go to the Underworld in one night.”

“Griffin is strong enough to keep Sinta together.”

Jocasta’s confidence doesn’t bother me. Maybe because I agree. “Does he always get what he wants?”

If she’s surprised by my question, it doesn’t show. “Griffin is very persistent. Relentless, even.”

Since there’s no point in beating around the Harpy’s nest, I ask, “Why does he want
me
?”

She looks genuinely puzzled. “Why wouldn’t he?”

Something tightens in my chest. Such blind loyalty, and she doesn’t even know me.

“Why don’t you want
him
?” She looks genuinely puzzled about that, too.

I press my lips together, not answering. “Has he been serious about anyone before?” I try to sound casual and fail miserably.

She shrugs. “Women have come and gone. I’ve never seen him fixated before, or really even care one way or the other. You’re different.”

I flush as hot as Jocasta did before, a mix of jealousy and triumph. I want to kick myself because I have no right to either emotion. “It’s probably just because I said no.”

A delicate crease forms between her eyebrows. “Why did you say no?”

I pluck at the blanket, accidentally pulling a thread loose. I try to stuff it back down before a whole section of embroidery unravels, but it doesn’t work. That’s me—destruction. “I have a complicated past.”

“Past lover?”

I snort. “Past mother.”

She looks confused. “Why does that matter if she’s dead?”

“Oh, she’s not dead.”

Jocasta shakes her head. “I still don’t understand what that has to do with Griffin and you.”

There is no Griffin and me. There can’t be.
“My mother has a tendency to destroy anything I might get attached to.”

Comprehension dawns in her blue eyes. “You won’t let Griffin claim you because you’re afraid your mother will harm him?”

Claim me?
Southerners have such a different way of putting things. So basic. Primal. Deep inside me, excitement flutters to life, and something needy clenches in anticipation. I ignore it. Whatever irrational part of me craves claiming will have to learn to live without. “Friends and lovers make you weak.”

“That’s not true.”

Instant denial. But she’s never watched people she loves murdered before her eyes.

“It is. They make you vulnerable because you want to protect them, and weakness never goes unpunished.” Eleni paid with her life, and at this rate, I’ll end up just like her.

“Love isn’t weakness,” Jocasta argues. “What in the Underworld did your mother do to you?”