A Plague on All Houses (25 page)

After Simone and Nathan's cinematic WTF reveal, we were sent off to decontaminate and clean up. Exhausted and heartsick, the remaining Wild Cards then went to the cafeteria. Gabriel and Gentry didn't join us. Guess they had some debriefing to do. The rest of us huddled dispiritedly together as we picked at our food, appetites killed by the loss of not one, but two of our team.

We weren't invulnerable. I guess we all knew that on some level, but till today none of us had really confronted the fact that even after surviving an experience that killed most people and given us all an extra edge, our lives were still fragile things and could be lost at any second.

It especially hurt to lose Mack, who had been our heart and conscience. Lil was devastated, silent tears slipping down her face as she stared at her hamburger and fries without touching it. Even Tony was at a loss for words, his usual relentless barrage of movie quotes and banter with Kai totally MIA.

I forced myself to eat, knowing I'd need the fuel for what we'd face when the swarm found us. We might have a few days or we might only have a few hours, so we had to be ready. All I wanted to do was go to bed and forget the last few hours had ever happened. I wanted Mack to be there with his basset hound eyes and warm smile. I'd even pay to hear Kaitlyn give one of her bitchy remarks. Anything but face the reality of their loss. So I forced my mind down another path, that of Nathan and Simone's :it's a small world” moment.

I mean, how weird was that? Nathan had conveniently vanished too quickly to answer any questions, not that I expected him to answer them anyway and we'd been hustled off right away for decontamination or I'd have cornered Simone. One of the things I liked about her was her transparency when it came to information other people would say was on a need-to-know basis. Simone treated the Wild Cards like they needed to pretty much know everything related to the zombie virus. And since we were putting our lives on the line on a daily basis, she was right.

Lil gave a small, choked sob, bringing my attention back to the present. “Oh, honey…” I hugged her tightly. “He might be okay…” Even as I said it, I heard the lack of conviction in my voice.

Lil shook her head. “There were so many zombies out there… Why did Kaitlyn do it? If she hadn't, Mack would still be here. We were almost home.”

The anger in her voice startled me.

“She was probably delirious,” I said carefully, trying to diffuse the disturbing edge I heard in Lil's tone. “Not thinking straight. And I think … she must have heard Gabriel talking about needing a diversion if we wanted to get back without immediately leading the swarm to Big Red. She probably thought she was helping us.”

“They're still coming, though. So it was pointless!” Her voice rose. “And Mack sacrificed himself for nothing!” Angry tears now streamed down her face.

I tried again. “We don't know that he's dead.”

“He is dead, he is! I hate her!” With that Lil burst into loud, braying sobs, worse than the night we went to get her cats. This time there wasn't anything I could do to make it better other than hold her and let her cry it out on my shoulder.

Tony looked uncomfortable with Lil's display of emotion, Kai sympathetic. But it was Tony who got a couple of damp napkins and handed them to me so I could press them on the back of Lil's neck and forehead as her sobs slowly tapered off.

When she finally had herself under control, he handed her a wad of dry napkins so she could blow her nose.

“Thanks…” Her voice was small and shaky, but the edge of hysteria had left it.

Poor Kaitlyn
, I thought. She couldn't have been in her right mind, but I'd no doubt she thought she was doing the right thing. I wasn't sure if it was a totally unselfish act or if she wanted to die, but I'd no doubt she thought she was doing the right thing for all of us. I thought about saying this to Lil, but figured now was not the time.

Someone cleared his or her throat. We looked up to see Nathan, clean and dressed in fatigues and a black T-shirt, a plate piled high with food in one hand, a glass of milk in the other. We hadn't even heard him come in. Talk about ninja skills.

He sat down across from Lil, Tony and Kai scooting their chairs over to make room. “You okay, kid?”

Lil took a deep, quavering breath and nodded. “Yeah.”

“Good. ‘Cause while your teammate did a stupid thing there, it was also a brave thing. She thought she was saving the team.”

“But Mack…”

“Also did a stupid thing, but a brave one.”

Lil looked down at her plate. “She wasn't worth his life.”

Nathan shrugged. “That's not your call to make. People are who they are, and they're going to do what they think is right even if it risks their lives and maybe other people's lives too. Like you risking your lives to save those cats. You think if you two had died the rest of your teammates would've said, ‘Gee, they died, but at least they saved the cats?’“

“If you want to live with yourself, go after the cat,” Lil said softly. Then she gave another deep sigh and nodded. “Mack wouldn't have been able to live with himself if he hadn't gone after Kaitlyn, right?”

“Probably not.” Nathan took a bite of burger, chewing and swallowing before adding, “Now eat some food. We're in for a fight and I don't want you fainting on us, got it?”

Lil picked up her burger and started eating it without another word.

I looked across at Nathan and mouthed “Thank you.” He gave his little lopsided half-grin and took another bite of his burger. I almost asked him about Simone then, but thought he'd earned the right to eat his meal in peace. It'd wait.

* * * *

We'd been told to convene in Room 217 when we'd finished cleaning up and eating, so as soon as everyone finished the last of their dinner, we trooped dispiritedly upstairs to the lecture hall where Simone, Colonel Paxton, Gabriel, and Gentry waited for us, the four of them sitting at the table in front.

Gabriel's expression was grim, but he looked so much better again, complexion back to normal. Guess he had his vitamin B shot or whatever. He caught me checking him out and smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. He and Simone both obviously had something on their minds.

Simone waited until we were all seated, purposefully avoiding looking at Nathan as he sauntered down the aisle and plopped down comfortably in the front row.

“Just like being back in college.”

If I didn't know better, I'd hazard a guess he was being deliberately provocative. Hell, I did know better and he
so
was being provocative.

Once we were all seated, Colonel Paxton stood up and said, “Before Dr. Fraser addresses the issue at hand, I want to tell you how deeply sorry we are for the loss of your fellow Wild Cards … and how proud we are of you for your bravery.” He sat back down.

Short, succinct, and, I thought, sincere. And no bullshit about dying for their country, like General Heald would have spewed.

Simone took the floor. She took a deep breath, then finally spoke. “Early on in this outbreak, we had run across an anomaly and—”

Tony raised his hand. “What's an anomaly?”

“It's a deviation from a common rule,” said Nathan, leaning back in his chair, an unreadable expression on his face as he stared at Simone. I would have killed for thought balloons for both of them.

“Er, yes. Thank you, Nathan.” Simone ran a hand through her perfectly coiffed hair. Several strands pulled free, a sure sign she was not her usual poised self. “As I was saying, we ran across what we thought was a unique case early on in the outbreak. This person contracted the virus and started exhibiting certain characteristics of the flesh-eating dead, but without actually dying. We used a vaccine on him … this person … a vaccine we'd hoped would cure the actual zombie virus itself. It didn't, but the vaccine
did
halt the progressive symptoms of what we thought was a unique mutation in one individual.”

A picture of Jake huddled over his wife and child flashed in my head. I knew where this was heading.

“But it wasn't. It seems the virus has another mutation to offer aside from the Wild Card gene.” Simone looked at us gravely, then continued. “If these people eat human flesh, they retain their personality and control over the progress of the disease. If they don't, their body will slowly decay along with memories and cognitive abilities. Eventually they will die and then resurrect as one of the walking dead.”

“So it's Hannibal Lector time or else,” said Tony.

Simone nodded. “As I said, we thought this was a unique condition. But there have since been two other people exhibiting these symptoms. One of them was here in the lab, in controlled conditions. She did not respond to the vaccine. And the other—”

“Jake. It was Jake.”

I knew from Simone's expression I was right. Then I looked at Gabriel, whose face was as white as it'd been in the Suburban before we'd crashed. He'd known too.

I stared at them both in disbelief and betrayal. “I thought we could trust you. Why wouldn't you tell us something like this? And Gabriel…” I stopped, heartsick.

Her expression stricken, Simone said, “If we'd had any idea you'd run into this in the field, I assure you we would have told you, Ashley.”

“How could you
not
tell us? Kaitlyn might still be alive if we'd known about this.” Not entirely fair, but I didn't feel particularly fair at the moment. “We trusted you. Both of you!”

I stood and strode up the aisle, too angry and hurt to stay there another moment. I'd made it halfway to the door when Gabriel said, “We didn't say anything because I was the first person to exhibit the symptoms.”

I stopped in my tracks. He was joking, right?

“We thought I was the only one until two days ago, Ashley. How comfortable would you—all of you—have been going into combat situations if you'd known the truth?”

I couldn't respond. All I could see was Jake's gore-smeared face—only this time, the features were Gabriel's.

“We've been trying to find a cure,” said Simone. “And the vaccine guarantees we can keep the symptoms at bay. Gabriel felt he'd be a more effective team leader if we kept his condition a secret.”

Nathan raised his hand. “May I say something?” he didn't wait for an answer. “Simone, you need to stop trying to justify an honest mistake on your part. And Ashley, you need to sit down and stop acting like a high school kid who didn't get invited to a party just because your boyfriend has a few secrets.”

My face flamed in embarrassment. “He's
not
my boyfriend!”

Nathan waved a dismissive hand. “Whatever. You're a civilian combatant in a military unit. Secrets are a part of the game, especially in a super-duper secret black ops unit like this one. Get over it and get used to it or get out of it. We don't have time for this high school shit. You're better than this.”

Ouch. Feeling as though I'd been slapped a few times across the face with a sloppy wet rag of reality, I swallowed a couple of times before managing to choke out an “I'm sorry…”

Then I saw Jake biting his dead wife's lip off again, and imagined Gabriel doing the same to me.

My stomach lurched and my gorge rose. I gagged and pressed a hand against my mouth, then ran out the door. The last thing I heard before it shut behind me was Gabriel saying “Damn it, she has the right—”

I barely made it to the bathroom before losing my dinner in one hot gush, then another. I hung over the toilet bowl for another minute, shaking with reaction. Finally, when I was sure nothing else was going to make its second appearance, I made my way to the sink, splashing cold water over my face and rinsing my mouth to try and get rid of the nasty-ass aftertaste of vomit.

I hate throwing up.

The door opened. “Ashley?”

I looked in the mirror and saw Gabriel looking at me, as uncertain as I'd ever seen him. “Are you—”

I held up a hand. “Please don't ask if I'm okay. I am so not okay I can't even begin to figure out where to begin.” I paced back and forth as I continued. “I saw a man, a living, breathing human, eating his wife and son. And now I find out that man could have been you. And I get why you and Simone didn't want to tell the team, I really do. But—”

“You still feel betrayed.”

I stopped mid-pace and faced him. “But why didn't you tell
me
?”

“It wasn't my decision to make.”

“Is that the only reason?”

Gabriel took a deep breath, eyes dark blue with turmoil.

“I mean, is this why you didn't… you know, you wouldn't with me…” God, could I sound any stupider? Or any more like a chaste romance heroine?

“Ash…you have to understand I don't know what's going to happen with this condition. I don't know if it's catching—”

“Like some sort of zombie STD?”

“Well … yeah.”

“What do you think they make condoms for?”

“Jeez, Ashley…” The light was dim, but I could swear he blushed.

“What? Don't tell me you're going get all coy and Victorian on me after we … er… almost did what we did.”

One corner of Gabriel's mouth lifted in a half smile. “I love it when you talk dirty.”

My turn to blush. “I just want to know if this … condition is why you wouldn't make love to me.” There. I said it. Almost as good as “he vas my
boy
friend!”

Gabriel nodded. “Yeah. I mean, you saw what happened back at Bigfoot's Revenge. And that's what would happen to me if whatever I've got runs its course without the vaccine. It's worse than being a zombie because zombies can't think or feel. But being alive… or half dead and knowing you're eating human flesh … that you have to if you want to stay alive…” He shook himself, like a dog shaking off particularly foul water. “I couldn't stand the thought of your disgust if you knew.”

“So … you rejected me so I wouldn't reject you.”

“Of course not! That's ridic—” Gabriel stopped mid-word. I just looked at him. “Yeah, I guess I did.”

“So it was okay for me to think there was something wrong with me.”

“That's not—” He stopped again. “I didn't think of it that way, Ashley.”

“I get that.” I did. But I still felt the need to play this scene a little further. “But that's what it boiled down to. You know that, right?”

“Ashley, I—”

“I mean, granted I'm not gonna start chowing down on you at inappropriate times, but a gal's got insecurities. I thought maybe it was my looks or the way I kissed or—”

“There is nothing wrong with the way you kiss.”

I ignored the heat in his gaze and continued, “So you didn't like the way I felt? Too fat? Too skinny? Too—”

He kissed me to shut me up. I didn't mind even though I was still angry that he hadn't trusted me enough to tell me the truth. But anger is a short step to passion and I let the two meld together as our mouths met in one of those kind of painful kisses where the teeth clash and tongues tangle and it hurts, but it doesn't and you just want more.

I grabbed a handful of Gabriel's hair with one hand and slid the other under his T-shirt, trying to pull him closer as he wrapped one arm around my waist, pressed his other hand against my butt, lifting me up to set me on the edge of one of the sinks. Our mouths stayed locked together as we continued to kiss feverishly, hungrily as if this were our last night on earth.

Our hands roamed up and down each other's bodies, finding curves and muscles, hardness and softness. Parting my legs with his knee, he pressed himself against me, the heat and hardness of his arousal almost enough to make me come on the spot. Nothing like a few near-death experiences to ramp up desire a few degrees Fahrenheit.

I pulled his T-shirt over his head and tossed it on the floor. My long-sleeved thermal followed, along with my … oh, never mind, I wasn't wearing a bra. He dipped his head down to my breasts, teasing each peak with teeth and tongue until the sensation was just short of painful, a real it-hurts-so-good type of feeling. I gasped as his fingers slid into the waistband of my yoga pants, slipping into my warmth with smoothness and ease, showing us both how ready and eager my body was to get down to business.

I arched against him, wanting more than his hands and fingers, as talented as they might be. I didn't say “Take me now,” at least not out loud, but my body had to be screaming it.

“Do you want this?” Gabriel whispered, nipping at my earlobe, hot breath fanning the clichéd yet very real flames of desire.

I nodded, growling deep in my throat as he pressed a finger against my most sensitive spot. He withdrew his hand, hooking those clever fingers in my waistband as he lifted me up with his other hand and pulled my yoga pants and underwear down and off my legs and feet. They joined the growing pile of clothes on the floor.

I reached down greedily to unbutton his jeans and started to shimmy them off his hips when he suddenly groaned, and not with desire. “Shit!”

“What?”

“I don't have anything with me.”

I put my hand against his substantial erection. “Looks like you have plenty to me.”

It was his turn to growl and press himself against my hand. Then he stopped and said, “I mean, protection.”

I couldn't help it, I laughed. “Gabriel. We are in a college bathroom in an extremely liberal part of Northern California. That is so not a problem.” I pointed to my right where a vending machine for condoms snuggled up next to one for Tampax.

Gabriel looked where I was pointing and gave one of his rare shouts of laughter. “Thank God we're not in Utah.” Pulling his pants back up, he went over to the condom machine and reached in his pants pockets. “Damn. You got any change?”

I shook my head. “Sorry. Spent it all at Bigfoot's Revenge.”

Gabriel gave the machine a hard thwack with the side of his fist. The little metal door creaked open and several foil wrapped condoms dropped to the floor. Gabriel scooped one up and ripped the foil open. “We can owe them.” Then he flipped the lock on the bathroom door, slid out of his jeans, kicking them to the floor, and came back over to me.

I watched as he approached, admiring his physique, especially his nicely muscled chest and arms, and those strong thighs and calves. And everything else in between and beyond. He was built like a classical Greek male statue rather than a gym junkie. Gabriel was someone who really worked rather than just worked out. I stared at him like someone who's been on Slim-Fast confronted with a pizza. He stared at me just as hungrily.

We didn't waste any time. We couldn't indulge in a long, languorous session of lovemaking or hours of hot-monkey love. We both knew we had to get back to the briefing, that a zombie swarm was headed our way, and that we might be dead in the next forty-eight hours.

But the moment Gabriel slid his length inside of me and we began rocking our hips together, the world went away for a while and none of it mattered. Everything was centered around the heat and warmth of our bodies, the sensations building in me as my warmth pulsed around his hardness sliding in and out of me. I wrapped my legs around his hips, the sink cold against my butt. We kissed frantically as our lust for one another grew, his mouth trailing from my lips to my ear where he nibbled on the lobe, moving down to my neck. A brief vision of Jake's bloody mouth flashed into my head, and I forced it away with a visceral effort. Fuck you, bad memories. Get out of my sex life.

I reveled in the feeling of Gabriel's teeth gently scraping against the skin. My hips began to rock faster as I felt things begin to heat up, the first flickers of orgasm starting to pulse in all the right places, spreading through my body in waves of liquid heat.

My muscles tightened around Gabriel, who groaned with pleasure as the pace of his thrusts increased in speed and power. The words ‘harder, faster’ came to mind, followed by “pussycat, kill, kill” and I started laughing even as I came in a great quivering wave of pleasure. Gabriel's orgasm followed almost immediately. He buried his face in my neck and said my name as he came, the shudders that racked his body sending more ripples through my loins along with another, smaller orgasm. Two for the price of one.

Then Gabriel's hands cupped my face and he stared at me, those gorgeous eyes of his so close to mine I could see flecks of gold in the denim blue irises. Sweat sheened his brow and chiseled cheeks, and strands of minted gold hair lay damp on his forehead. He looked good enough to eat. And yeah, I know that thought was just so wrong under the circumstances, but he really did.

For a moment we just looked at each other, both catching our breath as the last ripples of orgasm left our bodies.

He cocked an eyebrow, still breathing just a little heavily, and asked, “Why did you laugh?”

I told him, figuring he might as well know how my brain worked if we were going to have any future together. If we had any future at all.

Gabriel had a bemused smile on his face, and I hurriedly added, “I know I'm weird, but—”

Gabriel shook his head. “You're perfect,” he whispered, kissing my eyes, my forehead, my lips. “Not too weird, not too fat, not too skinny.”

“Not too hot, not too cold?”

I felt him smile against my lips before he replied, “Definitely not too cold.” He kissed me again, then looked at me. “Ashley…” He stared at me so seriously it almost made me laugh. Luckily I didn't. “You know what I could become. You've seen it. Are you sure about…” He paused.

“About us? About this? About the fact I want you so badly that I just made love to you in the women's bathroom?” I nodded. “Yes. I'm sure. Just … just promise me you'll trust me next time.”

“Next time…?”

I shrugged. “Next time you have some horrible secret that you think you shouldn't tell me. Tell me. I can handle your condition … I mean, I'm some sort of mutant too, right? But I can't handle you not trusting me enough to tell me.”

“Fair enough.”

He kissed me one more time, then reluctantly slid out of me. I let him go just as reluctantly, but we had serious business to attend to and I'm sure everyone was already wondering what we'd gotten up to during our absence.

Doing a quick cleanup, we both hurriedly dressed. I splashed water on my face again and checked for any obvious signs of our lovemaking.

“You gave me a hickey,” I said, looking at the bite marks between my neck and shoulder.

He pulled my thermal up a little higher and hid it. “No one will notice.”

I gave a little laugh. “Besides, Nathan already thinks you're my boyfriend.” I unlocked the bathroom door and reached for the handle, but Gabriel grabbed my wrist and turned me around to face him.

“Am I?”

“Are you what?”

“Am I your boyfriend?” He cocked his head to one side, an oddly vulnerable gesture for him.

“Do you want to be?”

Gabriel smiled. “Yeah, I think I do.”

I leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips. “Works for me.”

We walked down the hall hand in hand, unclasping our fingers only when we reached Room 217. I took a deep breath and went inside, Gabriel close behind. Was I embarrassed? Sure. No one likes to lose it in front of friends and colleagues. But as Nathan pointed out, now was not the time for high school shit so I'd suck it up and act like an adult.

Nathan had joined Simone, Paxton, and Gentry at the table in the front of the room. Guess he'd been promoted to one of the alpha dogs.

Simone smiled when we walked in. “Good, you two are back. We have a swarm headed our way with arrival estimated in approximately twelve hours, if that. Nathan.” Her tone became oddly formal. “If you'd be so kind.”

Nathan nodded. “We have around eighty trained soldiers, fifty non-coms, and an additional thirty or so survivors who may or may not have any useful combat experience. Doesn't sound like a lot when you think about what's going to be coming at us.”

Sure didn't,
I thought, sitting back in the front row next to Lil. She reached out and squeezed my hand.

““You ever see a movie called
Zulu
?” Nathan didn't wait for a reply, even though Tony's hand shot up immediately. “Less than a hundred and fifty British soldiers held off between two or three thousand Zulu warriors at a place called Rourke's Drift by erecting barricades of wagons and sacks of grain, then employing a classic military tactic: Stand fast, firing in ranks. Three lines.” Nathan got to his feet and started pacing enthusiastically. “First rank fires, drops down. Second rank steps up while first rank reloads. Third rank fires while second rank reloads. Oh yeah, and these Zulus, who happened to be some of the fiercest warriors in the world, were charging the Brits at a dead run, with shield, spears, and even some rifles of their own. But at the end of the day it was the English who walked away from that fight.”

Wow. I had to give Nathan points for motivational speechifying. I almost expected something along the lines of, “They can take our brains, but they'll never take our freedom!”

He looked at us intently. “So, how does that apply to us? We've got less than a hundred soldiers and a few thousand zombies. But the zombies don't have weapons and will be coming at us a lot slower than the Zulus, and with none of the strategy. So we'll be applying the ranks with a few other tricks up our sleeves.”

“Yeah,” said Tony. “But did you see
Zulu Dawn
? Took place in some funky place called Islandwana, where the soldiers are, like, totally obliterated by the Zulus.”

Nathan looked at him. “A, I hate movie buffs. B, that was the prequel. C, it's Isandlwana. And D, keep that to yourself. We're taking our chops from the winners, not the losers.”