Cale arrived at Diana's office with grass-stained jeans, and a dirty, gray shirt, but no ring. He had spent the better part of the last few hours combing through the yards in Diana's neighborhood in a futile search.
As he walked down the hallway to Diana's office, Jenny stepped out, and was dumbfounded at the sight of him. “Cale!? What are you doing here? I thought you guys broke up?”
“Can I see her?”
“Are you sure she wants you here? What about the pact?”
“You don't know?”
“Don't know what?”
Cale didn't debate. Didn't weigh his opinions. If Diana wanted her pregnancy to be a secret, well too damn bad. “She's pregnant.”
Jenny put both of her hands on her mouth to stifle the cry of jubilation. Running at Cale, she gave him a big hug and cried, “Good job, buddy! Now just don't screw up for the next eighteen years and you're gold.”
While Jenny still had her arms around Cale, Jamie walked around the corner and said, “Hey Jenny, do you have any contact information for...” Noticing her hugging Cale, he stopped and said, “Oh, I'm terribly sorry. Excuse me.”
Jenny backed away and said, “It's alright Jamie, you can come in. This is Diana's...friend, Cale.”
Jamie stuck out his hand and said very properly, “How are you doing?” expecting Cale to reciprocate the question after giving some standard, meaningless answer like 'good'. No one ever gives an actual response to this question... except for Cale.
“I feel like I just got off the world's biggest roller coaster where every seat had a fist-sized dildo facing up. I like the suit, man. You have some real Tom Cruise Firm action going on.”
“Huh?”
“Ahh, you're too young for that reference, that movie probably came out before you were born.”
After he said that, an unusual observation hit Cale. This was the first time in his life he told someone 'it was before you were born' in regard to a pop culture reference. It made him feel old.
“Well I know Tom Cruise,” Jamie responded uneasily. As well as he knew Diana, he couldn't figure out how she was friends with someone like Cale. “I should probably get back to work. It was nice to meet you.”
“See you around, Tom Cruise,” Cale said as Jamie left. Turning back to Jenny, he asked, “Was that reference too outdated?”
She shrugged.
“When did I get so old? Any of my pop culture references now have a minimum age of like twenty-seven.” Cale didn't want to go any farther into this topic. For some people, the gradual decay of hipness due to age can be tough to accept.
Diana's voice echoed from down the hall. “Thank you for coming in, Andrew. I think we have a good chance of emerging from this relatively unscathed.”
Cale peeked his head around the corner and saw her talking to an exceedingly tall man in front of the main entrance. He turned back to Jenny and asked, “So what do I do? She is already pissed at me for not picking up the phone earlier. Oh, and she's gonna be furious that I didn't tell her I was coming here.”
“My oh my, Cale Dawkins. Are you scared to face your baby mama?”
Cale laughed at the fact he now had a baby mama. “Let's just say it's not my wish to die today. Or lose either ball or penis for that matter.”
“Is that something Diana has threatened before?”
“If I said yes, would you believe it?”
“If you don't want to make her any madder, I would wait till after she finishes with that man out there. He's a new client and looks to be a good catch for Diana.”
“The way you said that almost makes me jealous. Thank God she’s my baby mama.”
Andrew’s voice floated towards him, “It was nice to see you again, Diana. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to call.”
While Diana watched Andrew walk out of her office and bypass the elevator in favor of the stairs, a familiar voice behind her said, “You know, I’ve always despised those guys who use the ‘I would turn gay for him’ line, but I think that Greek God has changed my mind.”
She turned around with a face that was impossible to read. “Mary, I’ll be back,” Diana told the head receptionist, and left the office with Cale trailing closely behind.
They stepped into the elevator without saying a word. Diana pressed the button for the lobby, stepped back, and gave Cale a slap he saw coming yet didn’t flinch.
Rubbing the red hand print on his face, he said, “I thought I told you if you really wanted to do some damage, then you need to use the side of your palm. Want a do-over?”
All of Diana's anger left with that slap. She looked at Cale who was giving her the other side of his cheek to hit, and leaned over to kiss his cheek, then his lips. As she pulled away, she said, “Let’s get some lunch and decide on what to do.”
Over the next two weeks...
Their first date:
“You are not getting suspenders, Cale.” Diana complained, and folded her arms so she wouldn't touch any of the clothes on the thrift store racks.
“Come on, darlin’. Tuxedo style, black suspenders. It'll be a good look.”
“No, they're too weird.”
Cale leaned close, grinned, and whispered, “I hate to break this to you, but you have no style.”
“Oh, I have no style!? That really means a lot coming from a guy who only wears a gray shirt and jeans. By the way, I've never asked, but why are those the only clothes you own?”
Cale looked around the store at the hipsters wearing tight pants, vintage jackets, and whatever ironic accessories they could find. He looked at the skiers and snowboarders in their neon everything. He looked at the drunks in their flannel shirts, ripped jeans, and beanies. At the sight of all these people, he simply said, “I guess I just wanna stand out.”
Diana hit him on the chest and said, “Clever, mister.”
“Why don't you go look for clothes for yourself? You might find something you like for cheap.”
Diana looked over at a bin with a sign, 'Women's Bras, Ten Cents', and felt a twinge in her stomach reminiscent of her earlier morning sickness. “No. Come on Cale, let's go. This place stinks and who knows what diseases you’re likely to get from the clothes.”
Setting the suspenders back on a hook, Cale said, “Never-mind, I wouldn't have a clue how to attach these to my jeans. Are you sure you want to go? There is a stack of wedding dresses in the back you might want to take a gander at?”
“Once again, I didn't agree to marry you. These dates are just a trial run. It'll be a miracle in itself if we can last through the entire pregnancy.”
Cale smiled and held out his hand for Diana, but she refused. He pleaded, “Oh come on, they wash all these clothes after they're donated.”
Diana shook her head 'no' and started to walk to the front without Cale. Coming up behind her, he wrapped his arms around her body and started kissing up and down her neck.
“Cale, you need to wash your hands!”
Cale grinned and touched her left cheek. She screamed the type of scream people do when sprayed by a water hose on a hot day - a playful request to stop. After she stopped squirming, she turned around to face him and said, “I hope you know I really do hate you.”
He nodded, and they kissed.
Their third night:
Cale dropped his head onto Diana's chest and slid down her body, finally stopping between her thighs. As he started on her, she started on him.
”Cale, I don't want to end up like the girls I grew up with. Their lives are depressing. I'm serious. My resume will always say more about me than my Facebook page. I'll kill myself before I have the status,
Making dinner for the family: macaroni and cheese. Yum yum. or Soccer practice, let's go Tigers!
or any other meaningless event those people feel the world wants to read. I will not be some pill popping housewife whose husband fucks her while she thinks about the mail man. Here put this pillow under me for leverage.”
“I am better than the men I work with and yet they get ahead because of their dicks and history. They'll make deals in locker rooms and strip clubs while I have to work twice as hard for the same accomplishments. Oh fuck, Cale! The wives of those men have no idea how powerless they really are. Those tragic women give up everything just to raise kids who carry someone else's name!”
“Right there, right there! I, for one, won't be a hypocrite! I won't be one of those women who blindly accept less than what they want. I know too much. I know how to live alone. I know how to make money. I know I want a lot from myself and for myself."
“Today I drove behind this minivan with a decal of a stick figure man, woman, two boys, a girl, and a dog. Never! That will never be me! Keep going on that spot! So I passed the sorry looking woman driving and all I could notice was her knotty hair, God-awful sweater, lack of makeup, and a face that looked way too old for her age. That woman was probably younger than me and has officially declared her life over. Until the day she dies, that woman will only experience joy and sadness through her kids, and ultimately grandchildren. Which I'm sure she'll push for relentlessly.”
"Men can make women doubt themselves. I do not doubt myself. I'm strong enough to work and have a family, and not be punished for it. God damn, Cale!"
Her voice trailed off as she bucked her hips in response to Cale's tongue. After thirty seconds of cries and screams, she fell back onto her bed as the only sound came from her heavy breathing. Cale looked up and arched an eyebrow in bemusement of where that rant came from. Looking down at him, she said playfully, “Your chin is shiny" and let out one more large exhale.
Their fifth date:
The night sky in Denver during late fall and winter is either one of two things. The first is a cloudless black where a few stars hang down for all the city to see. The second is an orange haze that blankets the city in a light almost as bright as day. It was this bright orange blanket that Diana and Cale found themselves under as they walked the streets hand in hand.
Diana, wrapped in a thick coat, gloves, and beanie, was warm despite the forecast calling for snow. Cale, dressed in a gray jacket, jeans, and carrying a backpack with a portable speaker dangling from the bottom was drinking from a water bottle full of gin and tonic. He was burning up despite urges to pace himself.