A Missing Peace (16 page)

Knowing what I needed was half the game. It was like football. I had the ball, and all I had to do was keep running.

Mirriam

As soon as both
Ommy
and Abrahem were gone, I ran across the street. These days, I only knocked at Caleb's if his mom was home, and she wasn't.

Caleb lay on the couch with his legs propped up on pillows, dark shadows under his eyes, and a pained expression on his face. I sat beside him. “Physical therapy didn't go so well?”

“It was canceled.”

“You did too much yesterday. I told you. Caleb, you look worse today.”

“I walked to Collins' office.”

“Well, that's great. Keep going at this rate, and you'll come out of this permanently unable to walk farther than twenty steps, unless Collins has you killed. If Collins has you killed, you won't have to worry about it.”

“Mirriam, calm down. This isn't Iraq. There are laws here.”

“What's that supposed to mean? Your laws didn't help our fathers.”

Caleb sighed. “I don't think he can have me offed here.”

“Keep telling yourself that. If you keep going like this, aren't they going to find out about me? You promised.”

“I will make sure no one who knows about this finds out you're here, but you can't expect me to let it go, either. If that's what you wanted, you should have never told me.”

I shrugged. “I told you because I wanted to be honest with you. I feel responsible for it and because you needed the truth. That and I think they owe you a whole lot. I don't want to watch you sign your life away.” I paused for a minute as I searched for the words. “Caleb, I think they know they owe you. It's the only reason I can see that they would find a loophole to enlist you. To keep you quiet. Do you know how much trouble they would be in if something happened to you when they shouldn't have enlisted you in the first place?”

It took him a second to respond. “I thought about that.”

A silence stretched out between us, and Caleb broke it by asking, “How was school?”

“Fine.”

“What's wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“M—”

“Do you still talk to Kailee?”

“I tried very hard not to talk to Kailee before I ever met you. What did she say?”

“Nothing. She knows I'm not Muslim.”

“I blew up on her when I saw what she did to your garage. I may have mentioned how stupid that was since you're not Muslim. I don't remember.”

That was simple enough.

“There's more you're not telling me,” he said.

“Hmm?”

“What else?”

“I don't know what you mean.”

“You're upset about something else.”

“I heard Farrah and Lacey talking about some girl you're taking to prom. To win a bet.”

He laughed. “That's stupid. You know you can't believe those girls.” Something about his tone made me think there was more to this than he let on. His face was paler, and the grimace he wore paraded the pain, so I decided he was probably just having a bad day. That was all.

Caleb

My phone rang, and I grabbed it, thankful for the interruption of this conversation. “I'm going to take this. It's Gade. He's called ten times today. I don't have much to say to him, but I don't want anymore calls.”

She nodded as I hit the speaker symbol on my phone and threw it on the couch. I figured Mirriam should know what was going on. It involved her, too. Knowing this couldn't be easy for her, I took her hand. I wished I could sit up enough to slip an arm around her. But my legs—and most of my body—felt like meat being pulled through a grinder.

“What the hell did you say to Collins?”

“That he killed my dad, and he needs to have the guts to admit it.”

“I told you not to do that.”

“Yeah, I didn't really give a damn.”

“Caleb, he's going to pin this whole thing on me. They're putting me in the brigs if I don't disappear first.”

“Come clean.”

“About what? It sounds like I told you everything. I was followin' orders. You can't let me go down for this. Miller, you're a military kid. You have to know what happens when you don't follow orders in a war zone. Especially when you're in the command of a nutcase like Collins.”

“You mean you come back in a body bag like my dad? I want you to go down for what you did. I want Collins to go down for what he did, too.”

“We don't even charge POWs for followin' orders.” My fist clenched tighter around Mirriam's hand. If Gade hadn't missed, she wouldn't be here.

“You aimed to kill a girl. You missed and hit my dad. I don't feel sorry for you.”

“If I hadn't followed orders,
I
would have come home in a box.”

I wondered for a second if this was true. That would be a drastic consequence for not following orders, war zone or otherwise. If Collins was crazy enough to kill a doctor for stopping a man's bleeding, a fifteen-year-old for mourning her dad, a fellow soldier for protecting a kid, it might be true. It just might. But it didn't change what Gade had done. It wouldn't bring my dad back. I couldn't take anymore of this. I picked up the phone to hit “end.” That's what I wanted. I wanted to end this.

As I pressed the red button on my phone, the front door swung open wide enough to cause a gust of wind. Mom's heels clinked against the hard wood floor. “Caleb—” She saw Mirriam and stopped. “Mirriam, could you go home? I need to talk to my son.”

First, Mirriam looked confused. I was confused, too. This woman who looked like my mother had gone against all notions of Southern hospitality and Texan friendliness. Then fear flashed across M's eyes, because she knew what I knew.

Something was wrong.

I groaned as I forced myself into an upright position. My muscles threatened to rip apart. I could be under that car all over again.

I slipped an arm around Mirriam as tightly as possible and kissed the side of her head. “I'll call you soon.” She looked from me to my mom, and that tinge of almost color filled her face like it always did when she was embarrassed. She popped off the couch, smiled at my mom, and was out the door.

“What happened today?” Mom's voice was sharper than I'd heard it since middle school when I got expelled for two days.

My phone buzzed against the table. One new text, but when I picked it up, Mom yelled, “Pay attention to me, Caleb Michael Miller. What happened today?”

“Nothing.”

“You didn't go to PT.”

“The doctor canceled.”

“Right.”

“Call and ask.”

“You talked to Collins.”

I leaned back against the couch. “I may have said ‘hi'.”

“And accused him of killing your father?”

“He did.”

“It was an accident. Enemy fire. You know that. Did that girl help you come up with this? Is that why you're burning flags all of the sudden?”

My jaw clenched. I was never disrespectful to my mother, but I was tired of people blaming Mirriam for things. “
That girl
pulled me out of the way of a moving car, in case you've forgotten. No, she didn't help me come up with this. A guy did. Someone who deployed with dad. Collins was the captain. It was his job to bring everyone home.”

She sighed and put her purse down. “You're really serious, aren't you?”

“Yes.”

“Why do you think Collins killed your father?”

“A soldier who was there told me Collins ordered it.”

“Collins randomly ordered someone to shoot your father, who he worked with for years?”

I shook my head. “Dad was protecting an Iraqi kid. Collins thought the kid was a terrorist and wanted them shot. The shooter missed…”

“Oh. My. God.” She slinked into the armchair beside the couch. She took a few deep breaths. “That sounds like something my Michael would do. Caleb, if this
is
true, and I'm not sure it is, you can't go around confronting people.”

“But—”

“Caleb, I—
we
need this job. I work for the base. You know that.”

“Collins threatened you?”

“Drop it, Caleb.”

She stood. “If you get hungry, order pizza. I need to think about things.” Her heels clink-clinked against the floor as she went to her room.

I opened the text I received earlier.

Your dad was clasping something in his hand when he died. I brought it home. Drop this, and it's yours. Gade

“You gutless bastard. Of course, I want my dad's things. You don't get to get away with shooting him.”

The next morning, mom had been gone less than twenty minutes when there was a knock at the door. It was too loud to be my homebound teacher. My body ached, and I wasn't ready to pull myself up yet, so I yelled, “Come in.”

Collins opened the door and walked in, cool and confident in his pressed greens. Already, I regretted inviting people in every time there was a knock.

“I talked to your mom.”

“You
threatened
her.”

“You say tom-eight-o. I say tom-a-to.”

“You threatened my mom.”

“I didn't come here to argue with you. I sympathize with your situation. That's why I made sure you were able to enlist.”

Sore or not, that was too much. I fought my way off the couch, ignoring the screams of pain in my back and legs. “My situation? You mean you ordering my dad dead?
That
situation?”

“Son, you need to calm down. Your mother wasn't pleased when I spoke to her yesterday, and I can't have anymore outbursts on my base. If I feel I'm being threatened, I'd have to ask that you not return to the base and make sure your military ID card is confiscated to ensure that. Civilian health care isn't cheap, and I know how much your mom makes.”

I laughed. “You killed my dad and want to leave me crippled, because I called you on it? You are sick. How do you sleep at night?”

“Like a baby. Caleb, I've known you most of your life. I don't want to see you hurt, but I won't let you destroy everything I've worked for and take down a few good soldiers in the process.”

“Collins?”

“Yes?”

“Get the hell out of my house before I blow your head off.”

“Don't go making threats.”

“I know where my dad's gun is. This is Texas, and you're on my property. Try me.”

Collins turned for the door, but not without giving me an amused look first. I wanted him to be intimidated. Scared. The amused expression burnt. It was a reminder of how helpless I was with a body that only half way worked.

Mirriam

The first chance I got, I was letting myself in at Caleb's house. He was on the phone when I came in.

“No, I'm not dropping this.”

Silence.

“That's not my problem.”

Silence again.

“Gade, I don't care if it kills us both. My dad was murdered by people he trusted. I want justice.”

I winced at the thought of it killing Caleb. I'd thought telling him about it was the right thing to do. Now I thought I made things worse by telling him. Maybe signing the dotted line wouldn't have been so bad.

Caleb sighed and threw the phone down.

“Everything okay?”

“Collins is threatening Gade. Why am I supposed to care? He was over here this morning threatening me.”

“Gade?”

“Collins.”

Shock shot through me. I wasn't sure what I expected. Collins obviously had no problem hurting, maiming, killing people, but this piece of information hit me hard. A surge of energy ran through my body, and I stumbled backwards. I balanced myself on my heels and set my feet straight again. “What do you mean Collins is threatening you?”

Caleb shook his head. “He said something to mom. That's what she was so upset about yesterday. I think he threatened to get her fired. Today, he threatened to confiscate my military ID card and have me banned from the base—where my physical therapist is.

A reminder of how dangerous these people were. However, I regretted telling Caleb about this for more selfish reasons. Like what would happen when they found out I was here—my family was here.

I swallowed past a lump in my throat. During my last encounter with these people, an automatic weapon was aimed at my head. What if they didn't miss this time? Last time, I'd lost
Baba.
I couldn't lose
Ommy
or Abrahem. I'd only known him for a couple of months, but at this point if something happened to Caleb my life was over. I wouldn't want to keep living.

“So what are you going to do?”

“I don't know, but I want to see Collins court-martialed. I know that. I'm not giving up. I owe my dad that much.” His glistening eyes met my own, and he continued. “It's for you too, you know?”

“Don't do anything for me. Two people—
good
people—died, and I got more than I deserved.”

“You were nearly killed.”

“What about Gade?”

Caleb shrugged. “I want him to pay. He pulled the trigger.”

“I know.”

“Apparently, Collins is threatening his life. Or so Gade says. At first, he was saying they would throw him in the brigs. I don't care. He deserves the brigs. But…” Caleb's voice trailed off, but I knew there was more.

“But?”

“He's got something of my dad's. He says he'll give it to me, if I drop them covering up my dad's death.”

“Who does?”

“Gade.”

I wanted to kick Gade for Caleb. He was such a coward. Gade had murdered his friend's father. He'd lied about it and covered it up. That was bad enough. But blackmailing Caleb with his father's possessions disgusted me.

“But you're not going to,” I said.