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Authors: Penny Jordan

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‘I love you,’ he had told her after making love with her, and in the bitterness of discovering how he had deceived her Anna had considered those words to be as much a fiction as everything else he had told her. But what if they had not been? What if they had been the truth—still were the truth?

‘Has he asked you to tell me all of this?’ Anna asked her challengingly.

‘No. Ward’s a very proud and independent man. He won’t like what I’ve done at all.’

‘So why have you done it?’ Anna asked her.

There was a brief pause before his mother, sounding heart-rendingly like a female version of Ward, told her seriously, ‘Because I wanted to know myself what the woman my proud and picky elder son has fallen so completely in love with is like.’

‘And you can tell that from a phone call?’ Anna derided gently.

‘You could tell you loved him through your amnesia,’ his mother retorted, before adding wisely, ‘Our sex have very well-attuned emotional instincts.’

‘And what you’re saying is that because I love him I should just ignore what he’s done, the way he’s behaved...’

‘Certainly not,’ Ward’s mother returned with a touch of asperity. ‘All I wanted to do, Anna, is to tell you plainly and simply that Ward loves you. I’m his mother; my natural instinct is to help and protect him—despite the fact that at forty-two he’s more than adult enough to take charge of his own life and to make his own decisions.’

‘And if I hadn’t told you that Ward got it wrong, that I had absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with Julian Cox’s shabby schemes, that I was as much a victim of him as your Ritchie, then how would you have felt?’

‘No different,’ Ward’s mother told her promptly and, Anna could tell, truthfully. ‘And to tell you the truth it pleases me more than you can imagine that Ward has been forced to admit that he loves you even though he thinks that you are in cahoots with Julian Cox. I’d begun to despair of him ever letting down his guard with anyone, or ever allowing himself to listen to his emotions. Had he produced some perfect woman he had chosen to become involved with because he thought she would make him a good wife, I would have been very upset. Ward needed to be shown that he’s only human, that his emotions cannot be controlled or contained. The fact that he thinks so badly of you and yet still loves you so much...’ She paused and then laughed before adding wryly, ‘Of course, I don’t pretend not to be very, very pleased to hear that my darling and oh, so idiotic son has got it so very, very wrong... I can’t wait to meet you for myself, Anna...’

Then it was Anna’s turn to laugh.

‘Don’t count your chickens,’ she warned her a little shakily. ‘Ward may have told you that he loves me and that my supposedly nefarious behaviour hasn’t destroyed that love, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he’s going to do anything about it, nor that I would want him to,’ Anna felt bound to point out a little hardily.

‘Oh, but he will,’ his mother told Anna very positively, pausing again before admitting, ‘I don’t believe in interfering in my sons’ lives—at least not normally—but during our...er...discussion it struck me that in the heat of the moment Ward might have been, shall we say, a little irresponsible—neglectful of the consequences of what he was doing...’

It took several seconds for what she was saying to sink into Anna’s consciousness fully, but once it had she sat bolt upright on her bed, her face flushing a hot pink with the recognition that Ward wasn’t the only one who had perhaps behaved irresponsibly.

‘Oh, but that’s...’ ‘Impossible,’ she had been about to say, but of course it wasn’t, and what was more... Anna took a deep breath. Suddenly her bedroom seemed to be filled with sunshine. Suddenly she felt absolutely on top of the world; suddenly that world had become a wonderfully exciting place.

A baby... Why on earth hadn’t she...?

‘There’s just no way Ward would ever turn his back on his child or its mother,’ Ward’s mother told Anna quietly. ‘But there is one point I should make, I think, Anna. When you do tell Ward the truth about your relationship with Julian Cox, don’t be surprised if he isn’t as pleased and relieved to hear it as you expect. He will be pleased, of course, but he’s also going to feel very much at a disadvantage with you because of it, and very ashamed of his own misjudgement of you. It will be one thing for Ward to offer you the generosity of his understanding of your errors, but he will find it very hard to accept your generosity over his.’

‘Yes,’ Anna agreed simply, knowing what Ward’s mother had told her was perfectly true.

When she replaced the receiver she felt so elated and excited that she could barely contain her emotions. She wanted to get up, get dressed, sing, shout, laugh. Ward loved her... Ward had never meant to humiliate or deceive her; he had simply seized the moment, just as she had seized him!

A baby...

Anna made a soft crooning sound of pleasure beneath her breath.

* * *

D
EE
WAS
JUST
about to turn into Anna’s drive when she saw the large Mercedes behind her, signalling to do the same. Frowning, she stopped her own car and got out. She knew that Anna wasn’t expecting any visitors. Warily she approached the now motionless Mercedes.

Its driver was instantly recognisable to her from Anna’s description.

‘Where do you think you’re going?’ she demanded angrily.

Ward stared at her. Who on earth was this virago?

‘I was actually intending to visit Anna—not that it’s any of your business,’ he returned coolly.

The young woman standing in front of him was quite plainly on the warpath but Ward had no idea why she should be—nor did he wish to find out. All he wanted to do was to see Anna, to hold her in his arms, to tell her how much he loved her...

Dee stared at him. She could scarcely believe the man’s effrontery.

‘Don’t you think you’ve already done enough, hurt her enough?’ she demanded furiously. ‘I know exactly who you are and what you’ve done, and if you think for one minute that Anna could want to see you...’

Ward frowned.

‘She’s discussed me with you?’

‘She’s told me everything,’ Dee informed him acidly.

Ward’s frown deepened. This very angry young woman standing in his way wasn’t a complication he had expected.

‘Where is Anna?’ he asked Dee curtly, looking past her towards the house.

‘She isn’t here,’ Dee fibbed. ‘She’s gone away. And even if she was here,’ she told Ward fiercely, ‘there’s no way she would want to see you after the way you’ve lied to her, deceived her...’

‘Just a minute,’ Ward objected grimly. ‘I had my reasons for doing what I did.’

‘If by “reasons” you mean your erroneous belief that Anna was involved in one of Julian Cox’s scams, then I have to tell you that you got it completely wrong,’ Dee told him scornfully. ‘Anna was as much a victim of his deceit as your brother.’

Ward stared at her.

‘I don’t know what you’re trying to say, but I know for a fact that Anna and Julian Cox were partners.’

‘Don’t you mean you know for a fact that you saw a piece of paper claiming that they were partners?’ Dee queried fiercely. ‘It’s a pity you didn’t check your facts a little more carefully. Had you done so you might have discovered the truth.’

‘What truth?’

‘The truth that Julian Cox simply used Anna’s name without either her knowledge or her permission.’

‘If that’s true then why didn’t Anna tell me that herself?’ Ward questioned Dee.

‘Perhaps she would have done so had she been given the chance and had she not been suffering from amnesia,’ Dee told him frostily.

Ward studied Dee’s set face. There was no doubt that she was speaking the truth.

‘If you had been honest with Anna, if you’d told her at the hospital just who you were and why you were there, no doubt in time, when she had regained her memory, she could have told you just how wrong you were in assuming that she was Julian’s partner.’

Ward paused for a moment before retaliating hotly, ‘If that’s the truth, then why didn’t she tell me when she had the opportunity the first time we met?’

Now it was Dee’s turn to pause.

‘She didn’t tell you because she wanted to speak with me first,’ she told him reluctantly.

‘To speak with you?’

‘Yes,’ Dee confirmed.

It was obvious to her that Ward was waiting for a more detailed explanation, but why should she give him one? After what he had done to Anna he didn’t deserve an explanation—he didn’t deserve anything.

‘Have you any idea just what you’ve done to Anna, just how much you’ve hurt her? You let her think...’ Dee stopped, pressing her lips together. ‘Do you really think there’s any way she’d want to see or speak with you ever again? You’ve had your pound of flesh and your money.’

‘Is that her decision or yours?’ Ward demanded bitingly, but Dee refused to be intimidated.

‘Anna’s my friend and it’s my right as her friend to protect her. I blame myself in part for what you’ve done to her. The only reason she ever got involved with Julian Cox in the first place was to help me.’

‘To help you? Why? What is Cox to you? An ex-lover...?’

‘No,’ Dee denied sharply.

‘You’re accusing me of behaving unfairly towards Anna, but it seems to me that you’ve scarcely treated her very kindly yourself,’ Ward accused Dee angrily. ‘By exposing her to Cox’s malice and—’

‘I didn’t tell Anna that I loved her. I didn’t allow her to believe we were lovers. I didn’t take her to bed and—’ Abruptly Dee stopped, suddenly conscious that she had said too much, trespassed too far into private and intimate territory.

It was useless trying to talk to this aggressive and angry young woman, Ward decided, and if he continued to stand here and argue with her he was going to be in danger of losing his own temper. He was still trying to come to terms with the bombshell Dee had dropped with her revelations regarding the truth about Anna’s relationship with Julian Cox.

Strangely, despite his resentment at the way Dee was speaking to him, Ward knew instinctively that what she was telling him was the truth. Suddenly everything clicked into place. No wonder he had been so confused about the apparent dichotomy in his misjudgement of Anna’s character and the way he had seen her behave. It made him feel as if someone was twisting a knife in his heart to know how badly he had misjudged Anna, how despicably he had treated her. No wonder she didn’t want to see or hear from him again. He couldn’t blame her.

It had been one thing to tell himself that his love for her was so strong that he could overlook her involvement with Julian Cox, it was quite another to have to acknowledge how totally their roles had just been reversed.

And, besides, even if Anna allowed him to talk to her long enough for him to tell her that he had known how much he loved her before he had discovered the truth about her, Ward was afraid that he simply wouldn’t be able to convince her. After all, in her shoes, he would not have been easy to convince.

He had treated her in the most cruel and unjustifiable way and it served him right that she now no longer wanted anything to do with him.

Without another word he turned round and walked back to his car.

Dee watched him get in and drive away before climbing back into her own car and driving up to Anna’s house.

* * *

‘A
NNA
,
WHAT
ARE
you doing out of bed?’ she asked as she opened the kitchen door and found Anna humming as she filled the kettle.

‘I feel so much better that I didn’t want to stay in bed any longer. After all, I’m not an invalid, you know,’ Anna responded dryly. ‘You don’t look very happy,’ she added perceptively. ‘Something’s wrong. What is it?’

Dee, who had had no intention of telling Anna anything whatsoever about her run-in with Ward, suddenly discovered to her own chagrin that she was actually flushing a little as she tried to mumble a protective fib.

‘Oh, it’s no good,’ she finally admitted. ‘I shall have to tell you. Anna, just... I was just turning into your drive when...when Ward Hunter turned in after me.’

‘Ward’s here? Where?’ Anna demanded, immediately flying to the kitchen window to peer out into the garden.

‘No, he’s not here,’ Dee told her. ‘I...I told him that you wouldn’t want to see him and, in fact, I actually told him that you weren’t even here.’

‘He’s gone? When? Just now? Oh, heavens, that means... Dee, I have to go after him. He’ll have gone home; I know the way.’

‘Go after him? What? After what he’s done...?’ Dee looked stunned.

‘No, it isn’t like you think,’ Anna assured her, quickly explaining to Dee what Ward’s mother had told her during their telephone call.

‘And you believe her, do you?’ Dee asked Anna.

‘Yes, I do,’ Anna confirmed quietly.

Dee was both startled and impressed by Anna’s unfamiliar decisiveness and determination.

‘It seems I’ve done the wrong thing, then, in sending him away,’ she commented ruefully. ‘I’m sorry, Anna, but I...’

‘It’s not your fault. After all, you didn’t know about Ward’s mother’s phone call. I know you just wanted to protect me, Dee, and I’m truly grateful to you for that,’ Anna told her friend, hugging her. ‘Can I ask you a favour, by the way?’ When Dee nodded Anna asked her, ‘Could you look after Missie and Whittaker for me? I don’t know when I shall be back—later this evening, if Ward refuses to listen to me.’

‘Yes, I’ll look after them,’ Dee agreed. ‘It’s the least I can do.’

CHAPTER TWELVE

W
ARD
HADN

T
EATEN
anything since breakfast but as he forced himself to go through the motions of preparing a meal he acknowledged that he didn’t really have any appetite for it.

What was Anna doing now? Where was she? He only hoped that wherever she was she was being treated with tenderness and the love she so much deserved, the tenderness and love he should have given her, he should be giving her, he so longed to give her.

As he had driven north he had kept picturing her in the hospital when she had looked up at him, her eyes shining with relief and love; at her house when she had turned her head and smiled at him; in his bed when she had told him, shown him...

Ward could almost taste the bitterness of his own pain. His eyes felt gritty and sore. He pulled open the fridge door and then closed it again, blinking fiercely. He had switched on the radio when he had come in, hoping that the sound would blot out the agony of his thoughts, but the voice of the woman talking jarred on him. The only voice he longed to hear was Anna’s quiet, soft one, the one she used after they had made love, all warm and tender with the emotion of what they had shared.

‘Oh, God, Anna!’

‘Yes, Ward?’

He swung round in disbelief, opening his eyes, which he had closed as he had cried out her name in helpless longing and despair.

‘Anna... What are you doing here...?’

Anna smiled tremulously at him.

It had been such a relief to drive into the courtyard and discover that his car was here, but now the courage and determination which had brought her in hot pursuit of him had been overwhelmed by her awareness of the risk she was taking, the way she was exposing herself to further hurt and rejection. Only Ward wasn’t looking at her as though he was going to reject her. He was looking at her as though...

Anna took a tentative step towards him and then stopped as he abruptly turned his back on her and reopened the fridge door.

There was so much they both needed to say, so many potential dangers and hazards in doing so that she was afraid they might still lose one another in a morass of explanations and apologies.

There had to be a way she could reach out to him, tell him...show him...

And suddenly, as she studied his back, remembering achingly how it had felt beneath her fingertips, the skin so smooth and taut over his muscles, the breadth of his shoulders so thrillingly masculine and powerful, she knew what it was.

Taking a deep breath, she asked him gently, ‘You might want to turn your back on me, Ward, but do you want to turn your back on your son or daughter as well?’

The speed with which he moved surprised her. One minute he was opening the fridge, the next he was jerking her forward against his body into his arms, demanding thickly, ‘What are you saying, Anna? My God, woman, are you
really...? Have we...?’

Behind her back Anna crossed her fingers, hoping that Mother Nature wasn’t going to make a liar out of her as she told him shakily, ‘It’s early days yet, but yes, Ward, I...I think we have...’

‘A child—you’re having my child...’

‘Our child,’ Anna corrected him firmly.

Ward shook his head, groaning.

‘My mother warned me that this could have happened, but I thought she was exaggerating the risk...’

‘I think maybe we were the ones who did that,’ Anna told him demurely.

‘You’re pregnant...with my child...’ Ward repeated. He was running his hands tenderly over her body, his eyes dark with emotion. Anna could feel his fingers trembling slightly as he cupped her face.

‘Oh, God, Anna, I’ve missed you so much,’ he told her rawly, adding, ‘Can you ever forgive me?’

He was a very proud man and Anna knew how much it must be costing him to ask for her forgiveness and understanding. Another woman might have been tempted to punish him a little more, to remind him of just what he had done and how much he had hurt her, but Anna’s gentle nature did not incline her that way.

‘We both made mistakes and got things wrong,’ she told him softly, adding truthfully, ‘We’ve been very lucky, Ward, because we’ve been given the chance to start again.’

‘I loved you before your friend told me the truth about Cox,’ Ward told her huskily.

‘I know; you told me so—after we made love...’

‘You heard that? I...’ He smiled painfully.

‘I heard it,’ Anna confirmed. ‘And even if I hadn’t,’ she added in a more light-hearted voice, ‘I would have to believe that you love me because your mother told me so.’

‘My mother? She’s spoken to you? But...’

‘But what?’ Anna demanded provocatively, lifting her mouth towards his.

‘But nothing,’ Ward responded thickly, accepting the soft invitation of her half-parted lips with the hungry pressure of his own. ‘Hell, Anna, you shouldn’t be allowing me to do this,’ he groaned as he kissed her. ‘There are things we ought to talk about, explanations I ought to make; apologies...I need...

‘What is it?’ he demanded as she tried to silence him by placing her fingertips against his mouth.

‘Later,’ Anna told him simply. ‘Take me to bed, Ward. I want that so much. I want you so much,’ she breathed ecstatically as he started to kiss gently and then nibble the fingers she had touched to his lips.

‘If we go to bed now, I’m not sure I dare trust myself,’ Ward confessed as he held Anna’s face and looked deep into her eyes.

‘I trust you,’ Anna told him steadily—and meant it.

‘Oh, Anna...’

Anna could see the emotion in his eyes darkening their colour and sparkling on his lashes.

‘We both...misinterpreted the facts,’ Anna told him
gently. ‘But, Ward, if you hadn’t thought I was Julian’s partner and if I hadn’t thought we were lovers, then we would never have had...this...’

‘How could I ever, ever have misjudged you so badly?’ Ward groaned as he reached for her.

* * *

‘W
ARD
...? I’
VE
BEEN
thinking,’ Anna murmured happily over an hour later as she lay nestled at Ward’s side in bed.

‘Hmm...’ he responded. ‘I don’t want to think; I just want to hold you and touch you, kiss you and—’

‘Ward,’ Anna protested half-heartedly, snuggling blissfully and murmuring her appreciation of the way he was lovingly nibbling at the delicate flesh of her throat. However, as his hand reached out to cup her breast, she caught hold of it and told him severely, ‘It’s about the baby...’

Immediately she had his attention.

‘I’d like Dee to be his or her godmother,’ Anna told him quietly.

‘Dee?’ Ward demanded suspiciously, knowing the answer to his question even before he had asked it. ‘She wouldn’t be that man-hating virago who refused to allow me to see you this afternoon, would she?’

Anna shook her head chidingly.

‘Dee isn’t a man-hater, Ward, and as for her being a
virago... Underneath she’s really very kind—and I think very vulnerable. I promise you, once you get to know her you’ll like her,’ Anna coaxed him lovingly.

‘I’ll try to believe you,’ Ward offered ruefully. ‘But right now,’ he added in a softer voice, ‘I’ve got far more important things on my mind...’

‘Oh? What things?’ Anna teased him.

‘Come here and let me show you,’ Ward said tenderly.

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