A Little Bit of Déjà Vu (17 page)

She continued to stare out the window.

“Damn it, I’m talking to you. Don’t ignore me.”

She turned and looked him straight in the eye. “When you say something that’s worth listening to, you pompous jerk, I won’t.”

He sucked in his cheeks in amusement. “I see you’ve developed some gumption over the years. I suppose late is better than never. How about we compromise? You can pay for the flowers, the photographer, the DJ, and Emma’s dress.”

“Fine.” She got out and slammed the car door.

Jake lowered the passenger window and shouted, “When a woman uses the word
fine
it generally means it’s anything but fine.”

She was simply sick of arguing. “Okay, you don’t like that word? How about the kids’ favorite one?
Whatever
.”

“You know, frustration in the bedroom often causes a sour temperament,” he called, backing out of the space. “Call me if you’d like me to sweeten yours.”

As his sexual innuendo dawned on her, she hollered after his car, “I’d jump in a snake pit first!” Or better yet, shove him in instead.

~~~

As soon as Jake got home, he strode into his study and punched out Roxanne’s number on the phone. Ever since she’d left them, he’d called her every month or so to give her an update on how Alex was doing. When his ex-wife answered, he hesitated a moment. She sounded different. Actually happy.

“Hello?” she said a second time.

“Hi, Honey, how are you?”

“Good,” she responded in a wary tone. “How’s Alex?”

“He’s the reason I’m calling. I was hoping you’d be able to visit in two weeks.”

“No.” Roxanne groaned. “I’ve told you before—I can’t take any more rejection.”

He tapped a pen against his knee. “I know. But something’s happened that’s made him more receptive to talking to you.”

“Oh? What’s that?”

“Alex is in love. He needs to resolve things with you, Rox. I told him the details about our problems. I think he finally understands you stayed out of his life because you love him.”

“Oh, Jake, please don’t get my hopes up. Does he really want to talk to me?”

“I think so. But even if he doesn’t, he needs to. He’s getting married the Saturday after next. In fact, if you can come a few days earlier, you could see him graduate.”

“Married? He’s only eighteen. Can’t you talk him out of— ”  Roxanne gasped. “He got the girl pregnant, didn’t he?”

“Yup. And I wouldn’t be surprised if his problem with you is why. The kid is starved for a woman’s love. He needs to set things right with you before he commits to a wife. Otherwise, he’ll just end up transferring his anger—”

“Knock it off with the psychology crap. You don’t have to convince me. I’ll be there.”

“Emma’s a sweetheart.” Or at least she used to be.

“If you think she’s special, then I’m sure I will, too.”

He gnawed on his lip and sighed. As soon as he introduced Roxanne to Maggie, she would undoubtedly guess, so he might as well be up front with her.

“That’ll depend on whether you can forget who her mother—”

“I know who she is, Jake. Chris told me who Alex has been dating.”

“Chris? How the hell did he know? I just found out two days—”

“How do you think Maggie ended up working in the same school district as you?”

Jake slammed his hand down on the cherry desk. “That interfering son of a bitch!”

“Don’t be mad. He meant well—despite how it turned out. It just proves history really does repeat itself.”

“That twelve-step program has worked wonders if you can defend two people who’ve made your life miserable.”

Roxanne sighed. “I’ve just made so many mistakes I have no right to condemn anyone else.”

“Well, I hope you’re cutting
yourself
some slack, too, while you’re at it.”

“I’d like to, but….” She fell silent for several moments as if she couldn’t find the right words. “Jake, I have a confession to make. I know it would be kinder to leave you in the dark, but I’m trying to get on with my life. For my own sanity I need to get this off my chest.”

“Okay.”

“I hope you can forgive me.” She inhaled audibly and spit out her words in a rush. “
While-we-were-married, I-had-two-abortions
.”

His gut felt as if he’d been sucker punched.

“I know how much you wanted more children.” She sobbed. “But I was taking so many drugs I was terrified what they would do to a fetus, and I couldn’t stop. I didn’t want to destroy another child’s life. And I have to admit a part of me wanted to punish you.”

His chest shuddered as he squeezed his eyes shut to stem the tears brimming in his eyes. “I understand why you felt you had to do it,” he rasped. Women had no idea how helpless it made a guy feel to know he had no say over his unborn baby’s life. At least his ex-wife had had some justification for her abortions—unlike Margie who simply hadn’t wanted his baby.

“I’m really sorry. Can you forgive me?”

“I’ll try.” He grabbed a tissue from the box on his desk and wiped his eyes. “After what I put you through, I have no right to hold a grudge.”

“Thank you.”

“So how about Alex’s graduation that Wednesday? Can you make it?”

“Not at this late notice. I have a major customer flying in that day. But I promise I’ll be there for the wedding.”

“Come Friday night and stay in our guest room. We’ll all have dinner together. It’ll give you and Alex a chance to talk before the wedding.”

“O-okay.” Her voice faltered. “So, have you and Maggie….you know?”

“No. I’ve told you how ambivalent I feel toward her.”

“And you don’t think years of dreaming about the woman means something?”

Sure. It meant he was nuts.

He rubbed his face. “I don’t deny wanting Maggie. But that’s all wrapped up in a ton of resentment. I have no idea how I feel about her, otherwise. For example, this afternoon I could’ve throttled her.”

“I think there’s a lot more to your fixation than you think, Jake. What would you tell Gherkin if he told you he’d been lusting after the same woman for nineteen years?”

He heaved a frustrated sigh. “Oh, hell, I’d most likely tell him to sleep with her and get her out of his system.”

“And what if he wanted her even more afterward?”

“I guess it would mean he probably loved her.”

“Thanks.” Roxanne chuckled. “That’s just what I needed to hear.”

~~~

Emma tossed her turkey sandwich down on her lunch tray, nauseated by the odor of greasy beef stew in the cafeteria. “How can they expect people to eat in here when the place smells like dog food?”

“That sick look on your face tells me the rumor about you might be true,” Kristen mumbled, munching her potato chips.

Greg Stenchler’s strawberry blonde girlfriend and Emma had been eating lunch together ever since they’d double-dated for the prom.

“Yeah, it’s true.”

“When Greg called last night and told me you and Alex were gettin’ married, I sort of figured it must be.”

Emma held out her left hand. “Well, it’s official.”

“Ohhh, Em!” Kristen squealed and squeezed her hand. “Your ring is beautiful.”

Brandy plopped down across from her, clacking her chewing gum. “So, I guess you must’ve been absent the day Mr. M covered abstinence, huh, Emma?”

Kristen glowered at her. “You’re a fine one to talk.”

“Me?” Brandy pointed at her D-cup boobs, her eyes widening in feigned innocence. “I’ll have you know,
I’m
still a virgin.”

“Yeah, right.” Kristen snorted. “You and Pamela Anderson. You may not have spread your legs for anyone, but you’ve had more dicks in your mouth this year than three porn queens put together.”

“Hey, at least I’m not trappin’ some guy into marriage and ruining his life.”

Emma glanced around the cafeteria. She refused to give Brandy the satisfaction of knowing she’d upset her. “I think I’ll go see what’s keeping Alex and Greg—”

Just then, the guys strolled into the lunchroom. As Alex scanned the rows of tables, his gaze locked on Brandy and a look of terror flitted across his face. He raced across the room and slid into the chair next to Emma. “Get lost, Brandy, you’re in Greg’s seat.”

“Really, Alex.” Brandy huffed. “You’re so inhospitable. I just stopped by to see Emma’s ring.”

“And to insult her,” Kristen added.

“So who’s gonna be your maid of honor?” Brandy asked, knowing full well Emma hadn’t lived in the area long enough to have a best friend.

Alex slung his arm around Emma’s shoulders. “Not that it’s any of your business but Em and I are planning to ask our parents to stand up with us. Aren’t we, Angel?”

They were
? Emma looked up at Alex and mouthed a silent thank you. Somehow, he always knew how to make things easier for her. “That’s right.” She turned and flashed a saccharine smile at the bitchy cheerleader. “I would’ve asked you to do me the honor, Brandy, but I’d like to be able to look at my wedding pictures without puking.”

~~~

Margie pinched the bridge of her nose while Simon read an old newspaper clipping covering one of that year’s high school football games. “Try it again, Simon.”

“He threw a pr-pre....” He glanced up at her, his blue eyes pleading for help.

“Perfect.”

“He threw a perfect
spr—sprial
.” He wrinkled his forehead. “That’s supposed to be spiral isn’t it?”

“Yes. You’re putting the R sound in the wrong place in these words.”

Simon held his dark blond head between his hands. “I’m never gonna get this, Mrs. B.”

She was beginning to feel like he might be right. “Yes, you will. Did you know experts suspect Walt Disney, Thomas Edison, and Albert Einstein all had learning disabilities, too?”

“Yeah, but they were all geniuses.”

“You’re very smart, Simon. I couldn’t begin to memorize all your football plays. And you get As in algebra.”

“I remember this game. Alex’s touchdown in the last quarter was awesome.”

In using the subject of football to motivate Simon all year, Margie had learned everything she’d never wanted to know about the sport.

“When he dropped back to pass on the fourth down, his safe pocket broke apart. Instead of throwing a Hail Mary, Alex managed to find a hole in the line. The only problem was his receiver was out of the pass pattern, so he had to cross the line of scrimmage and run the ball himself. Would you believe he made a seventy-yard run for a touchdown?”

The enthused twinkle in Simon’s eyes told her she was on the right track using football to motivate him. With any luck, Jake would be able to build the kid’s self-esteem.

“I suppose that made his father proud.”

“You’d think so, wouldn’t ya? But I heard the coach chewing Alex out afterward for not playing it safe. Which I don’t get. I’ve seen highlights from Rocket’s pro games, and he took a lot bigger chances than that.”

“He was being paid to put himself at risk,” she pointed out, “Alex wasn’t. And Coach Manion also had his back broken as a result. Unlike his son,
he
had his education to fall back on when his football career ended prematurely.”

Simon rolled his eyes and muttered in a sing-song voice, “Which is why I have to learn to read better.”

“Exactly.” She wrote the word spiral both the correct way and the way Simon had read it, using a red marker for the R’s and a blue one for the vowels blended with them. “Do you see the difference?”

“Sure.” He slumped in his seat, despair etching his face. “When you point it out to me.”

Her throat swelled closed. He just needed a little hope in his life. “Eventually you’ll start seeing it without me showing you. I’m giving you a list of words with Rs and vowel blends in them for homework. I want you to copy them the way I just did, using a red marker to write the Rs and a blue one for the vowels. Then read the list out loud to yourself.”

She jotted down twenty words and handed him the paper. “If you can read this list to me tomorrow without making more than two mistakes, I’ll arrange for you to have a private workout with Coach Manion.” Of course, she wasn’t about to tell the kid Jake would call him regardless.

Simon left the classroom with a spring in his step as Louise, the school librarian, poked her head in the door. “Hey, how’d the big reunion go on Friday night with
you-know-who
?” She strolled into the room and rested her butt on the table’s edge. “Was it as awkward seeing him again as you thought it would be?”

Friday seemed like a million years ago. “Awkward doesn’t begin to describe it. The kids wanted us to meet so they could tell us my daughter is pregnant.”

Louise clapped a hand over her mouth. “Oh, Lord. I’m so sorry. I assume, since Emma told you about it, she’s planning to have the baby.”

Margie nodded. “The kids are getting married, and then Emma’s moving in with Alex and Jake until they leave for Penn State. I don’t know how I’m going to get through the rest of this year.”

She spent the next several minutes telling Louise how she’d spent her weekend fielding Jake’s uncomfortable questions and advances while they’d planned the wedding. “You’ll be getting an invitation for two Saturdays from now at three-o’clock. You’re one of four guests on my measly list.”

“Oh, damn.” Louise groaned. “My nephew is getting married that same day. I’m sorry, Marge. I wish I could be there all day for you. But I should at least be able to make it for Emma’s ceremony.”

“That’s okay. Don’t sweat it.” Once Emma moved out, Margie would be spending a lot more time by herself. She might as well get used to being alone. “Now I have only two weeks to lose the blubber I’ve put on in the last year and a half, so I won’t look like the Hindenburg in the wedding pictures. I’m planning to start walking. Want to join me tomorrow at lunchtime?”

“Sure. But I wouldn’t worry too much about your weight, Margie. It sounds like your plate’s going to be so full the next two weeks you won’t have time to eat.”

“True.” But what was she going to do after the wedding? “On a brighter note, Jake agreed to work with Simon this summer to help motivate him while I tutor the kid.”

“That’s good news.” Louise smiled. “If nothing else, it should help distract you from Emma leaving home.”