A Hope for Hannah (31 page)

Relieved by what she saw, Hannah relaxed. A faint smile played on Bishop’s face. She was certain he even nodded once. Apparently Jake wasn’t straying too far from what was expected, or maybe Jake had proved himself in other ways, and Bishop now trusted him.

“Through His work with Israel, God took the best route to Christ,” Jake said. “Along the way, He had allowed war, and He had allowed David to have many wives, but when Christ came, the fullness of God’s will was revealed.

“The baby in the manger shows what God truly intends for His people. He shows how they are to live in a world of sin and sorrow. If God can fulfill His promise of bringing Christ into the world, if He can move past wars to the unprotected manger, then He can also fulfill His promise now.

“That promise,” Jake said, “is the day coming—a day when all tears will be wiped away, all sorrow and sin removed in a new heaven and a new earth. It will be just as wrong for God’s people today to think that suffering and sickness could be removed from our present earth as it would have been for the people in King David’s day to think they could live without fighting wars.

“God allows imperfections because that is what is best. Somehow, in fact, God is pleased to work through the imperfections of this world.”

Hannah wasn’t certain, but she thought there was a glisten of tears in Jake’s eyes. Then they vanished, and yet they had served to compel Hannah to listen even more closely.

“The loss of those we love, of children—even those unborn—troubles us,” Jake said. “It leaves an emptiness inside, and we wonder why God would allow such loss. We go to funerals and mourn our departed loved ones. We cannot even begin to understand the suffering and sin in the world.

“Why, then, would God send us only a child in a manger as an answer to all of this? Why not just wipe out sin? Why not destroy the devil? Why not stop all the killing in the streets of our big cities? Why not raise up a righteous government in Washington that could rule without sin? Would that not seem like a better answer to us?”

Jake paused and then answered his own question. “To our understanding, perhaps so. Yet in God’s design, it would be wrong. We must not think that the presence of suffering makes God unloving and uncaring.”

Jake paused again to look across the gathering of men and women, many who watched him with upraised faces. “We must live,” he continued, “blameless and harmless in a sinful and suffering world because that is the way God wants us to live. We should never blame God because He doesn’t explain everything to us. He owes us no explanations.”

Jake paused again and then decided that was all he wanted to say. He then asked for testimonies. Mose spoke and was followed by two of the older men.

Hannah sat tensely as each man spoke, fearful that someone would say Jake had erred in his sermon. But no one did. Instead they all pronounced it the Word of God and confirmed God’s blessing on it.

Jake stood up again, announced prayer, and closed the service as they all knelt. The younger children made a rush to leave the room, followed more slowly by the young people. Hannah rose to help prepare the noon meal in the kitchen.

Thirty-four

“Did you notice…Sylvia and Ben aren’t here?” Betty whispered to Hannah as the two women approached the kitchen.

“Yes, I noticed,” Hannah whispered back.

“They’re leaving,” Betty said with horror in her voice, “for a liberal church.”

“I was afraid of that,” Hannah said.

“Are they being excommunicated?” Betty’s voice was still a whisper.

Hannah knew this was dangerous territory, especially for a minister’s wife. If she had information, she shouldn’t share it before a public announcement was made. “Bishop will decide that,” she finally said, thankful they were approaching other women and the conversation would have to end.

“I would think so,” Betty said with finality.

“Hello,” Elizabeth said to the two women.

Amos’s wife, Mandy, placed butter on plates and said to Hannah, “You can help with these.”

Hannah knew what that meant. She picked up two plates in each hand and headed back toward the living room. When she arrived, the men had already scooted the benches together, two or three wide, and set them on risers to form tables, and two women had covered them with vinyl tablecloths.

With a glance behind her, Hannah saw Betty following with bowls of peanut butter. Together they set out the items with even spaces between them. By the time they came to the end of the table, other women had placed the forks and knives on the tables. The first round of food was ready five minutes later.

Hannah stood in the doorway of the kitchen as prayer was announced and the meal began. Because Jake was now a minister and thus climbing the ladder of seniority, he got to be at the head of the line.

The same would, no doubt, be true for her eventually, she figured. But for now, the other women didn’t insist on her going first but allowed her to stay in the regular line of women. This suited Hannah just fine because any rhythm from her old life was a comfort and made her less aware of the changes in her life.

She ate during the second round and then helped with a few stragglers in the third round. The last round consisted of only one table, which was set up in the master bedroom. Hannah was certain there was a purpose to Elizabeth helping her serve, and she didn’t have long to wait to find out what it was.

“I hope you weren’t too disturbed the other night,” Elizabeth said more than asked.

Hannah shook her head.

Elizabeth smiled. “I told John he shouldn’t conduct church business in front of everyone. He just thought it might help to have the meeting at your place—that it might make Ben and Sylvia more comfortable.”

“I hope it did,” Hannah said truthfully.

“I see they didn’t show up today.” Elizabeth glanced around. “John will be disappointed.”

“Jake too,” Hannah said.

“John is hoping it won’t spread,” Elizabeth said with a worried look. “I think he’s changed his mind about Jake.”

“Oh.” Hannah glanced around to see if anyone was listening. No other women were close, and the few children at the table were intent on their peanut butter sandwiches.

“Yes,” Elizabeth continued and nodded. “I think he’s right for the position, especially after today. John will be happy.”

Hannah’s face showed her question.

“Jake’s kind of preaching might be just what is needed for our young couples. You heard what Sylvia and Ben said—about the spiritual part. This might help. John thinks God might be helping us out through Jake.”

“Are there more people thinking of leaving?”

“John thinks so. Seems there’s some sort of a movement going on in Kalispell. There’s a lot of temptation.”

“And here too?” Hannah asked, surprised.

“Well, not so much just yet, but John’s afraid it might be coming our way.”

“So Sylvia and Ben are gone for good?”

“We don’t know for sure,” Elizabeth said. “I suppose they went to church over there today—had someone drive them. It does sound like they’re serious, though.”

“Do you think there’s anything can we do,” Hannah asked, “to keep them here?”

“That’s what I really wanted to talk to you about,” Elizabeth said with a quick glance around to make sure she was free to speak.

Hannah waited, wondering what more could possibly come her way.

“At the ministers’ meeting this morning,” Elizabeth said, “John told me he was going to ask Jake to talk with Will and Rebecca Troyer.”

“Will and Rebecca?” A picture of the couple flashed into Hannah’s mind. They were already married when she first came from Indiana to help with Betty’s riding stable. As she remembered it, Will had moved in from a community in Bonners Ferry, but Rebecca was local.

“They weren’t here today either,” Elizabeth said.

“Are they leaving too?”

“Well, it’s something else…kind of,” Elizabeth said, leaving Hannah more puzzled than ever.

Betty bustled up behind them. “Oh,
here
you are. Have you enough help with this table?”

“Yes, I think so,” Hannah said.

“Oh,” Betty said, glancing at Elizabeth, “did I interrupt something?”

“Not really,” Elizabeth said with a smile. “I was done.”

“Well…” Betty replied.

Hannah could see Betty was curious. Once again, the burden of kept confidences would weigh heavy on her shoulders.

“I’ll go get the water pitchers,” Elizabeth said.

“Church things,” Hannah said when Elizabeth moved out of sight. Any more than that, she didn’t want to say.

“Oh,” Betty said, obviously disappointed not to be told more.

Elizabeth returned with the water pitchers and smiled knowingly at Hannah.
Apparently she trusts me,
Hannah thought, not sure she enjoyed the feeling.

“Hannah, why don’t you stop by this week?” Betty asked. “On Thursday afternoon we’re having the youth over. We’re making Christmas packages for a ministry in Libby. There’ll be games and such afterward. You could help me get ready. Jake could stop by on his way home.”

“Oh,” Hannah answered, taking an immediate interest, “I’d like that.”

“You’ll ask Jake, then?”

“He shouldn’t object,” Hannah said. She liked the idea of some activity that wasn’t associated with Jake being a minister.

“The young people will enjoy it. I think a lot of them like Jake as a minister,” Betty said, spoiling the moment. “You’ll come, then?”

“If Jake doesn’t object,” Hannah said.

“Good. Oh, there’s Steve,” Betty said with a glance out the living room window and toward the barn.

“Jake’s not far behind,” Hannah replied. She didn’t see Jake at the moment but figured he must be about ready to go home. True to her words, the next man to come out of the barn was Jake, his horse following behind him.

Betty left to retrieve her shawl from the table by the back door. She found it just about the time Hannah stepped up to the table. “There it is!” Betty said. “Thought I’d never find it.” And with that she disappeared out the door.

Hannah took a minute to find her shawl and bonnet, and by the time she stepped outside, Betty was already in the buggy with Steve. Jake had their buggy pulled up right behind them. Hannah tightly wrapped the ends of her shawl around herself as she walked down the sidewalk and climbed into the buggy.

“Chilly,” Jake said, pulling his black suit coat tighter around himself and shaking the lines to get Mosey moving.

“You should have brought your winter coat,” Hannah said. Next Sunday she would see that he wore it.

Hannah glanced at Jake out of the corner of her eye. He looked the same as always, yet this was the minister who said all those things this morning in his sermon. She struggled to connect the two images and then gave up. They were simply too far apart. One stood beyond her grasp, the other sat right beside her and talked like the Jake she had always known. Were the two really the same man?

“Bishop wants us to go talk with Will and Rebecca,” Jake said just like that.

“Elizabeth told me he might,” Hannah replied.

“Oh, she did?” Jake sounded surprised. “Did she say why?”

“No, not for sure.” Hannah looked at Jake. “I hope they aren’t leaving.”

“Like Sylvia and Ben?”

“Yes,” Hannah said.

“No, it’s something else,”

“Why are
we
going?” Hannah asked. “Why doesn’t John go himself?”

“He thinks this might work better.”

“Why do you have to do this kind of work so soon?” Hannah asked.

“Bishop wants it.”

“I know why,” Hannah said. “Elizabeth told me.”

Jake looked at her. “What did she say?”

“Bishop likes you now and thinks you might do Will and Rebecca good. He’s changed his mind about you, I guess. People like your preaching, and so you are being put to work.”

“Maybe that’s what we’re here for,” Jake said, turning his eyes back to the road ahead. “It’s the work of the church. I didn’t choose it.”

“But you enjoy it.”

“Maybe,” he allowed. “It makes it easier that way.”

“It’s not easier for me,” she said with a catch in her voice.

She looked at Jake, expecting his new preacher look, the one he had worn earlier in the day. She thought he might even say things about duty and how she needed to learn to be a good minister’s wife. But instead he brought his arm around her and pulled her close.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I wish it wasn’t so hard.”

That brought a sob she couldn’t hold back.

“You’re a wonderful wife,” Jake said.

“I lost your child,” she said between sobs.

“No,” he said. “Heaven gained him. God allows only what works for the best.”

“It’s still too awful,” she said, her head on his shoulder.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts,” Jake said.

Hannah looked out at the Cabinet Mountains towering in the sky. As the wind pushed against the trees on the slopes, the sound of Jake’s voice and the words he chose soothed her spirit.