A Heart So Wild (23 page)

“But he wasn't?”

“No. He didn't tell me, though. I had to hear it from Maggie, hell, two years after he'd come
here. He'd opened up to her by then. She was the only one, in fact, who learned anything at all about him.”

“Why did he come here?”

“His mother,” Fletcher said simply. “You could say she forced him, but the fact is, he would've done anything for her. See, he had reached the age where he would have been a full-fledged member of that band of Comanches, with all the privileges that went with being a man, including taking a wife. I guess she figured that before he settled down in that world, he ought to have a taste of this one so he wouldn't have any regrets later on. I give Meara credit for that,” he said, more to himself than to Courtney. “She was thinking of the boy, not of herself.

“She'd asked him to give it five years here. He took off after three. She wanted him to enjoy all the advantages of wealth, and I don't mind telling you, I'm a rich man. But he scorned my money. She was probably hoping he'd be open-minded and really give it a chance before making any decision. But the boy's mind was made up before he even got here.

“After ten years with those Indians, Kane
was
a Comanche, in every sense but blood. He never tried to fit in here. He was just biding his time, and learning what he could from us whites, as he surely thought of us. Well, at least his mind wasn't closed to knowledge. Who knows, he might even have stayed the full five years if I hadn't made an issue over them goddamn braids of his.”

“Chandos doesn't have them anymore,” Courtney offered quietly.

“No? Well, that's something, anyway. But he doesn't have that band of Comanches anymore, either.”

“That isn't exactly true,” Courtney said, explaining briefly. “He hasn't been alone in hunting down those men who attacked the Comanche camp. In fact, there were Indian friends of his close by on our whole trip through Indian Territory. He would have traveled with them if he hadn't agreed to escort me to Waco.”

“Why did he agree to that, Miss Harte?” Fletcher asked, very curious. “That doesn't sound at all like the Kane I know.”

“He didn't want to. He tried his best to convince me not to make the journey at all. In fact, I had given up trying to persuade him, when he suddenly changed his mind. I thought it was because he was coming to Texas, anyway. I had offered him all the money I had if he would take me along. I thought we had a deal. But when I tried to pay him tonight, he got angry and said the money had nothing to do with it.” She shrugged helplessly, then said softly, “He said I shouldn't assume anything about him or try to understand what motivates him. He's right, too. I don't begin to understand what makes him do the things he does. He's the gentlest man I've ever known—and the most savage. He can be loving and protective, then turn on me and try to make me hate him.”

“Loving? Protective? I never thought to hear those words used to describe Kane.”

“Four years is a long time, Mr. Straton. Are
you
the same man
you
were four years ago?”

“Yes, unfortunately. Old dogs never change.”

“Then you still want to make Chandos into something he isn't?”

“No. I think I learned better than to try that again. He may be my son, but he's his own man. But goddamn—did you say ‘gentle'?”

Heat rose in Courtney's cheeks, and her defenses rose, too. She had practically confessed to their intimacy, for why else would a man like Chandos be gentle?

“I said Chandos is the most gentle man I know, Mr. Straton, but the occasions when he was were rare. Most times he's cold, curt, thoroughly exasperating, stubborn, and don't let me forget dangerous, deadly, and merciless. Oh, and heartless. Also, unpredictable—”

“I get the picture.” Fletcher cut in with a chuckle. “So he hasn't changed all that much. But if he's all those things, little lady, how did you fall in love with him?” he said quietly.

She considered denying it, but what was the use? Maggie had probably told him that she'd admitted loving Chandos.

“Not by choice, I assure you,” Courtney said stiffly. “But you, Maggie, even Sawtooth—I'm afraid you've all gotten the wrong impression somehow. You seem to think I will draw Chandos back here. That won't happen. I said he was loving, not that he loves me. If he ever does come back here, it won't be because of me.”

“I'd like you to stick around anyway, Miss Harte, at my expense.”

“Well, I mean to stay in Waco, Mr. Straton.”

“I meant here at the ranch.”

She shook her head.

“Didn't Maggie tell you my father lives in
Waco? He's the reason I came to Texas. I came to find him.”

“Yes, I know. Edward Harte. But that doesn't mean you'll want to live with him. He's got a new bride. Are you sure you'll be happy staying with them?”

She wished he hadn't asked that. “I won't know anything until I've seen my father. But in any case, I couldn't stay here.”

“I don't see why not. We're not exactly strangers now. And we've got one thing very much in common, Miss Harte. We both love my son.”

“I
T'S a nice, fair-sized town now,” Sawtooth was saying as he drove the buckboard down Waco's main street. “It wasn't this big before the war, but afterward, a goodly number of Southerners moved here to start new lives. The cattle drives stop here on the way north, and that's helped, too.”

“It's not another cowtown, is it?” Courtney asked with considerable dread.

“Like the ones in Kansas? No, ma'am.” He chuckled. “The cowboys ain't built up wildness when they come through here, not like after they cross the Indian lands.”

Courtney smiled. Of course Texas wouldn't be anything like Kansas. She remembered how glad she'd been to finally reach a town after crossing more than two hundred miles of unsettled territory, to finally have a hot bath, eat real food, sleep in a bed. She understood now why trail drivers needed to celebrate and raise a little hell. She just hoped they didn't raise any here.

There were dozens of men wearing guns, but as they rode down the main street, she saw only a few who truly looked like gunfighters.

At least Waco had a town marshal to uphold
the law, which Rockley didn't. And though many men wore guns, there were just as many who didn't. There were finely dressed ladies strolling down the boardwalks too, with gentlemen escorting them. Courtney noticed Mexicans too, a couple of Indians, and even a Chinese man. It made Waco almost seem like a city.

“There's your pa's place.” Sawtooth pointed up ahead. “He has his office there, too.”

It was nothing like their home in Chicago, but it was a nice two-story house, well tended, with newly planted flower borders running around the house and along the fence that circled the small yard. The house was on the corner of a side street. There were chairs on the covered porch and a padded bench chained to the overhanging roof, which made a swing. She imagined it would be nice to sit there on warm evenings, since you could see all the way down the main street from there, yet you were secluded enough to be inconspicuous yourself.

“What's his wife like, Sawtooth?” Courtney asked nervously. As they stopped in front of the house, he answered.

“Miss Ella? Why, she's a real nice lady, least everyone says so. She teaches school. She came here after the war with her brother. He's a lawyer. He lost an arm in the war. Miss Ella was helpin' him out in his law office until the teacher we had moved back East. She offered to take the teacher's place, and she's been at the school ever since.”

Courtney's nerves were getting the best of her. Lord, another stepmother to contend with! All she could think of was how intolerable the
last one had been. But her father must have
wanted
to get married this time, which made a big difference. He hadn't married for reasons of propriety, so maybe he loved Ella.

“Well, ma'am?”

Once again she had let Sawtooth stand there waiting to help her down. “I'm sorry,” she said as she took his hand and stepped to the ground. “I guess I'm a little nervous. It's been so long since I've seen my father. And I've changed a good deal these last four years. Do I look all right,” she asked, her voice shaky.

“You look pretty enough to marry, even for a confirmed bachelor like me.”

“Does that mean yes?” She grinned up at him.

He just chuckled. Reaching for her carpetbag behind the buckboard, he then nodded toward her horses, tied to the back of the wagon.

“I'll take your horses over to the livery,” he said. “I know your father keeps a buggy there.”

“Thank you.” Courtney leaned forward to kiss his cheek. “And thank you for bringing me to town. Do you think I'll see you again soon?”

“Most likely.” He grinned. “Fletcher will probably have me or one of the men come to town every day to pay you a call.”

“To see if Chandos has shown up?”

“Yup. Either that, or he'll set someone to watch your father's house. I wouldn't put that past him.”

Courtney shook her head ruefully. “It will be for nothing. I wish he'd see that.”

“What he sees is another chance to get his son back. And that's
all
he sees. He's hopin' Kane might even be willing to settle down now,
because of you. He'd give anything to have him livin' close to home, not necessarily on the ranch, but close enough so he could see him sometimes. You wouldn't know it, seeing the way they used to go at each other, but Fletcher loves that boy.”

“Chandos asked me once if I could live the way he does, always moving, never staying in one place for more than a few days. I don't think he will ever settle down, Sawtooth.”

“How'd a subject like that come up—
if
you don't mind my askin'?”

She turned pink. “I asked him if he would marry me. He won't.”

Sawtooth wasn't as surprised that she had done the asking, as he was that Kane said no. “You mean he turned you down flat?”

“No. He just asked if I could live like he does.”

“Then you turned him down?”

“No. I told him that's no way to raise a family. He agreed. That ended the discussion.”

“Could you live like he does?” Sawtooth ventured.

Her brow creased. “I don't know. I used to think that the safety and security of a home were more important than anything. But I've learned these last few years that the home depends on the people living in it and not on anything else.”

She knew she was telling an awful lot to a near stranger, but she decided to go right ahead. “I always felt safe with Chandos, even in the middle of Indian Territory. But I do want children someday, and children can't keep
moving around all the time. So I just don't know.” She ended with a sigh.

“Men are known to change their minds about what's important, too,” Sawtooth offered.

Some men maybe, Courtney thought, but not Chandos.

Knowing how nervous she was about seeing her father again, Sawtooth left her.

Determinedly, because that was the way Chandos would have done it, Courtney marched straight up to the house and banged on the door. It opened almost instantly, a tall, spindly woman standing there expectantly.

“Ella?”

“Goodness, no.” The woman chuckled. “I'm Mrs. Manning, the housekeeper. If you want Mrs. Harte, you'll find her at the schoolhouse this time of day.”

“No, uh, actually, I'm here to see Edward Harte.”

“Come in, but you'll have to wait a while. He's across town visiting a patient.”

Mrs. Manning led Courtney into the patients' waiting area, a room filled with straight-backed chairs. Courtney didn't mind. She didn't want to explain herself to this woman, and she needed time to compose herself before seeing her father. Fortunately, the room was empty. So she sat there alone, waiting for the doctor's return.

It was the longest twenty minutes of her life. She fidgeted, she fussed with her green dress and her hair. She got up and paced, then sat down in a different chair.

Finally, she heard the front door open and her father's voice calling to Mrs. Manning that
he was back. He passed by the open doorway on his way down the hall to his office.

To her surprise, Courtney couldn't seem to find her voice. She wanted to call to him, but could not make a sound.

A moment later he came back, filling the doorway. She stood up, staring at him, still unable to utter a sound. There she stood in the middle of the room like a dolt, her mouth open, the words stuck behind the tight swelling in her throat.

He didn't recognize her for a full minute. But something about her kept him from speaking. He simply returned her stare. Perhaps it was her eyes that did it. Her eyes hadn't changed, and they were enormous at the moment, pleading with him.

“My God—
Courtney?
”

“Daddy,” she cried.

He ran toward her. She flew into his arms. And when those arms closed around her, she felt the most incredible joy she'd ever known. Her father was holding her as she had so often yearned to be held by him.

After a long, long time, Edward set her back from him and looked at her. His hands touched her face, smoothing away her tears. His own face was wet with tears, and in that moment Courtney knew he really did love her. He had always loved her. It had only been her own doubts that had made it seem otherwise. God sakes, what a foolish child she had been, so wrapped up in misery that she couldn't see what had always been there.

“Courtney?” he whispered. “How? I thought you were dead.”

“I know, Daddy.”

“You weren't taken. I saw the Indians leave, and they had only the farmer with them.”

“I was in the barn.”

“But I looked for you in the barn. I shouted for you until I lost my voice.”

“You didn't look in the feed box.” There was no accusation in her voice. She was simply stating a fact.

“Of course not. It wasn't big enough to conceal…my God, how?”

“Mr. Brower had dug out a hole beneath it. He made it for his wife. He was in the barn when the attack started and he told us to get in it. And Sarah and I had both fainted. I guess that's why we didn't hear you calling.”

It took a moment for the obvious to register with him.

“Sarah is alive, too?”

Courtney nodded. “And married again.”

She explained that everyone had thought him captured, that it was considered impossible for him to have survived. She told him she'd never stopped hoping, never, and then quickly recounted the last four years, and told him about seeing his picture in the old newspaper.

“Sarah thought I was crazy, but to tell you the truth, I think she didn't want to believe it was you. She likes being married to Harry.”

“I've remarried again, too, Courtney.”

“I know. I spent last night at the Bar M with Margaret Rowley. She told me about Ella.”

Hands on his daughter's shoulders, he gazed out the window. “Good Lord, I've got two wives! I'll have to do something about that.”

“And Sarah has two husbands,” Courtney
said with a grin. “But I'm sure she'll agree that one annulment is better than two divorces, don't you think?”

“I can only hope so.”

“Daddy,” Courtney asked. “Why did you leave that farm? You were wounded. Why didn't you wait there for help?”

“I couldn't bear it, honey, thinking you'd died in that burning house. I had to get away from there. I know it was the wrong thing to do, but I wasn't exactly thinking coherently at the time. I didn't even take a horse with me, which shows you the state of my mind. I wandered as far as the river, and then I collapsed. A preacher and his family found me. We were well into Indian Territory before I was lucid enough to realize they were taking me to Texas with them.”

“So that's how you came to Waco.”

“Yes. I tried to forget. I made a life for myself. There are good people here.” He stopped suddenly, then asked, “How was it you stayed at the Bar M instead of coming into town last night?”

“That was as far as Chandos would take me.”

“Chandos? What kind of name is that?”

The name I'll use until I finish what I have to do
. “It's the name his sister gave him. He's actually Fletcher Straton's son, or rather estranged son. It's kind of hard to explain about Chandos, Daddy.”

“Tell me how you got here from Kansas.”

“Chandos brought me.”

“Just him?” he exclaimed, and she nodded. “You traveled alone with him?”

The code of morals that had forced him to
marry his housekeeper was evident in his shocked expression. Courtney surprised herself by getting angry with her father.

“Look at me, Daddy. I'm not a child anymore. I'm old enough to make my own decisions. And if I chose to travel alone with a man because it was
the only way
I could get here, then that's that. It's done, anyway,” she said in a quieter tone. “I'm here.”

“But were you—all right?”

“Chandos protected me. He didn't let anything happen to me.”

“That's not…what I meant.”

“Oh, Daddy.” Courtney sighed.

“‘Daddy'?” came a shocked voice from the doorway behind her father. “Edward, I thought you had only the one daughter.”

Courtney was delighted with the interruption, timed as it was. She was afraid her father would take a typically parental attitude toward Chandos. But she wasn't the timid creature she'd once been. She wasn't going to apologize for something she wasn't at all sorry for. And yet this wasn't the way to start a new relationship with her father.

So even though she was fully prepared to dislike the lady standing in the doorway, she stepped around her father and extended her hand graciously.

“You must be Ella.” Courtney's smile was warm. “And yes, he does have only one daughter—me—alive and well, as you can see. But I'll let him tell you all about what happened. I left my bag on the porch, and if Mrs. Manning could show me to a room…?”

She was trying to maneuver her way around
the surprised Ella and get through the doorway when her father stopped her, a warning note in his voice. “We will continue this discussion later, Courtney.”

“If we must.” She tried to sound cheerful. “But I really would like to get settled. And I'm sure Ella doesn't have much time right now—or is school finished for the day?”

“No, no, I do have to get back.”

Courtney smiled again at the bewildered lady before leaving the room. Outside the closed door, she leaned against the wall, her eyes shut. She could hear them talking inside the next room, her father explaining, and Ella sounding so pleased for him.

Ella was quite a pretty woman, and young. Courtney hadn't expected her to be so young, only about twenty-five. With bright red hair and pale green eyes, a vivid combination, Ella certainly didn't look like any teachers Courtney had ever known.