A Heart Once Broken (41 page)

“The couch, I suppose?” Ezra pointed.

“You can come to the kitchen with me,” Lydia suggested.

“Did Harvey come into the kitchen with you?” Ezra's gaze pierced her.

“No,” Lydia said. “Remember, we were just friends. There were never romantic feelings on either side. He is a decent man and much in need of a
frau
. I hope he finds someone…soon.”

“I do too, then,” Ezra said. “And about Rosemary…I loved her, but in God's plan, it wasn't meant to be forever. Maybe Rosemary was right all along. Maybe we were given something for a time, something for a reason, something that wouldn't have happened any other way, or at any other time, something…”

“
Yah
,” Lydia agreed. “It was God's way of comforting Rosemary…and Harvey.”

“Perhaps we had best leave these things to the Lord. I am here and you are here, and we have apple pie to eat.”

“Just like a man!” Lydia teased. “It always comes back to his stomach!”

As she turned to slice the pie, soft footsteps came up behind her and Ezra's arm slipped around her shoulder. She turned back to him to bury her face in his chest, and the embrace of his arms closed around her. This seemed so right and yet so long in coming. Lydia
started to cry. “It'll be okay,” Ezra whispered into her hair. After a moment, he released his embrace.

Lydia gathered herself together and continued cutting the pie, then poured them each a glass of milk.

Ezra took Lydia by the arm and both plates with the other. “Come. The couch is more comfortable.”

Lydia brought the milk glasses in both hands.

Ezra seated himself and took the first bite. “This is quite
goot
.”

“See, I can cook.” Lydia gave him a triumphant look.

Ezra laughed. “I never had my doubts.”

When they had finished, Ezra said, “So, now one important question remains.”

“
Yah
?”

“Can I come again next Sunday evening?” he said, flashing a grin.

“You can.” Lydia looked deep into his eyes. “I would be pleased, very pleased.”

Chapter Forty-One

L
ydia was hanging out the wash on a Monday morning. Ezra had said he would stop by later to pick her up for a drive over to a small farm he had his eye on. Ezra wanted to know whether she liked the house, and would consider…

“I'm sure I'll like it,” Lydia had assured Ezra on Sunday evening. “Whatever you like, I'll like.”

“I still want you to see it,” Ezra had insisted.

More than anything, Ezra probably just wanted to spend time with her. He still hadn't formally asked her to be his
frau
, but that was where things were headed. They had both known this would be the eventual outcome ever since Ezra first brought her home from a Sunday night hymn singing.

Occasionally guilt niggled at Lydia with the thought that she had stolen Rosemary's boyfriend, but Ezra's presence always comforted her. Ezra knew where he wanted to go in life, and he wanted her along. Maybe that made everything right enough to say the marriage vows together. Many a woman had married a widower, and she would be doing no worse. She must open her heart fully to the joy of Ezra's love. How long had she waited for this to come into her life? Too long.

Lydia hung a shirt on the line. The pinned laundry had begun to move as the breeze stirred.
Yah,
life moved on, and she must move with it. She was in love with Ezra and Ezra loved her. There was no shame in that. The Lord had made a man to love a woman, and a woman to respond to his attentions. She would say the vows with Ezra this fall.

Lydia reached into the hamper again, holding the clothespins in her mouth as she struggled with a long dress. Her reputation in the community was back to where it had been before
Daett
's financial mess. There was nothing to prevent her wedding day.

Ezra's strength since Rosemary's passing comforted her. Not only his physical strength, but also an inner strength that he had not previously possessed. When Ezra held Rosemary in his arms that dawn, he had seen more of the other side of the river than he admitted. Lydia would have to dig the memories out of him sometime, but she hadn't dared so far. The matter seemed too sacred to approach yet. Perhaps after their wedding vows, she would ask him.

Ezra was changed, that she knew, and for the better. Of course she had undergone her own adjustments. Ezra would no longer be impressed with the silly girl she had once been. Neither was she capable of further childish stunts, like the ones Sandra and she used to pull.

Lydia hung the last piece of laundry on the line and hurried toward the house. Emma was in the kitchen with her apron on and flour all over the table. There was a tidier way to make bread than this, but Lydia held her tongue. Emma had already made up her mind to jump the fence after her
rumspringa
time was up. But
Mamm
still hoped to change both of her youngest daughters' minds. She must not interfere or make things difficult for them.

“You don't have to get that look on your face,” Emma snapped. “I know I'm not like you when it comes to baking bread, but neither do I have to be. I'm leaving for a world where they have bread-making
machines, or you just buy the stuff at the store.” A look of bliss filled Emma's face.

Lydia kept silent as Emma continued. “You could have had the same thing, you know, instead of this boring life we lead. Rudy would take you back gladly.”

“You should think about coming back yourself,” Lydia told her. “Back to where you belong.”

“Not a chance!” Emma said.

“You should join the baptismal class this fall,” Lydia said. “Become a church member and settle down.”

“No way,” Emma replied as she measured flour into the bowl. “I'd have to learn how to bake bread properly, and put up with an Amish husband who would work me half to death.”

“Sometimes the hard things lead to the best end,” Lydia said. Emma made a face at her sister and added milk to the bowl, then stirred the contents. “Think about it,” Lydia added as she heard Ezra's buggy pull in the driveway.

Lydia washed her hands, grabbed her shawl, and went out to greet Ezra's waiting buggy.

“What's the big smile for this morning?” Ezra teased as Lydia climbed in the buggy.

“Just glad to get away from washing,” Lydia teased back. “And from trouble-bound sisters!”

“So you just want to get away,” Ezra said. “It's not about me.” His boyish grin appeared.

“Okay,” Lydia admitted. “I was thinking of being with you.”

Ezra chuckled. “Well, that's better. Did your
mamm
object that I took you away from the housework this morning?”

“Nope. She's glad I'm with you,” Lydia said.

“Then your
mamm
approves of me?” Ezra raised his eyebrows in mock surprise. “Of me? Just think about that!”

“You are so full of yourself this morning,” Lydia teased.

“No, I'm just happy that I'm with you and that we're on our way to look at a lovely farm—our future farm.”

Lydia gave Ezra a shy look. “Did I miss something? If you're taking me to see a farm that you might buy for
us
…shouldn't we do something formal about…
us
?”

Ezra grinned. “I think I've been plain enough about my intentions.”

Lydia faked a glare. “I think we should…like, maybe…”

Ezra's laughter filled the buggy. “Okay, I give up.”

“I mean, we do still have to say the wedding vows, so we still should…” Lydia stopped.

Right now she wanted nothing more than for Ezra to take her in his arms and kiss her…but he wouldn't do that. Not yet.

Ezra kept a grin on his face as the miles rolled under the buggy wheels. Lydia leaned back and closed her eyes. Ezra would ask the question eventually. And then she would begin to plan the wedding. What a day that would be!

A mile later Ezra pulled back on the reins and turned into the driveway of a well-kept farm on River Road. The trimmed white house stood back from the road, with small bushes and a rail fence. The porch went all the way around the side and was wide enough for a front porch swing. There was no swing there now, but Ezra would add one right away, Lydia was sure.

“Here it is,” Ezra proclaimed. “Do you like it?”

“Oh yes! But I'd like to see the inside,” she said, still thinking about the unasked question that would settle whether she would live in this house. Ezra was a German-stubborn man, but surely he would ask the question soon.

Lydia jumped down to get a better look. They'd have to make a lot of changes to the place. The power pole would have to go, of
course. And all the signs of electric power.
The hitching post will go right here,
Lydia decided. She could see their guests arriving already. Sandra would tie up her horse and run toward the house while Lydia rushed outside to greet her. Sandra would have her
bobbli
along, because she was already showing at the last Sunday meeting. Such things were all hush-hush in the community, but the obvious was the obvious. Sandra had giggled when she caught Lydia's eye. That was all the answer she needed. Sandra was happy with Clyde, and Lydia would also be happy here in this place. She already knew that. Ezra would be here, and that would be enough.

“I'm glad you like it,” Ezra whispered in her ear.

“You still haven't asked the question,” Lydia reminded him.

Ezra laughed. “No, I guess I haven't, have I?”

Lydia rolled her eyes. He was obviously teasing her. She wondered if he realized women had a limit when it came to teasing about marriage.

“There's no one home,” Ezra said, “and I have the keys. Let's look inside.”

Lydia relaxed and allowed the stillness of the farm to wrap itself around her as they walked up the porch steps.

Ezra paused to unlock the front door, and stepped back to motion her inside.

Lydia caught her breath. The house had appeared small from the outside, but the look had been deceptive. The living room was open and spread back toward the kitchen. They could easily have the church service inside the house. That was always a plus, since houses large enough to hold winter services were growing scarcer each year. She could hold her head high and announce that Ezra's house was ready to take its place among the best. She could already see Bishop Henry standing at the kitchen entry to preach the closing Sunday message. They would spread the tables out afterward,
and the married men could eat at one end and the married women at the other. There was also a basement. She had seen the outside entrance on the way in.

“Like it?” Ezra asked.

“I love it.” Lydia's gaze swept the living room again.

Ezra's hold on her hand tightened. “Will you, then? Marry me, Lydia? And live in this house? With me and our
kinner
, if the Lord gives us any?”

Lydia struggled to breathe. He had asked so suddenly, yet
not
so suddenly. The moment had been a long time coming, but now it was here.

“Well, will you?” Ezra repeated. “I want you to be my
frau
, Lydia.”

“Oh, Ezra.
Yah!
Of course I will! Oh, you've finally asked. Can I hug you?”

As an answer, he wrapped his arms around her and Lydia buried her face in his chest. The sweet smell of straw and of the haymow filled her senses.

“You wanted more, didn't you?” he whispered in her ear.

Lydia closed her eyes and lifted her face to his. For a long moment he didn't move. Then he kissed her gently. When he drew back, Lydia opened her eyes to gaze into his. “Ezra, I'm so very happy!”

“You deserve happiness,” he said, wrapping her in another tight hug. He let go and said, “Now that you've had your wish, shall we look at the rest of the house?”