A Gray Life: a novel (8 page)

“I can’t say you sounded like my dad, but you sure sounded like somebody’s dad.” Ashley said when
Christopher was done with the phone call.

He
stood up, and the girls did the same.

“Right.
Let’s go upstairs and I’ll take you to the guest rooms.”

Back on the main floor, there was a grand stairc
ase. Like the main floor, the third floor was as big as another house entirely. Three different hallways led away from the loft landing at the top of the stairs. At least four doors were in each hallway. Twelve rooms? It was a ridiculous extravagance for a bachelor, or even a family of six.

“Some of these are closets, and bathrooms.” Christopher said, reading Ashley’s mind.

He walked down the middle hallway and opened up the second door. “You can sleep in here, Ashley. The door on the left is the bathroom.”

Across the hall, he opened a third door and gestured inside. “This other door is where you’ll find towels, blankets.”

Juniper cleared her throat. “Uh, that’s a bathroom.”

Christopher looked inside the open door and then shut it. “I knew that.” He opened another door. “This is the closet---damnit.” Inside the door was a bedroom.
“Nevermind. You’ll find the towels you need, somewhere.”

Ashley bit her cheek to keep from laughing. Her host seemed nervous, and not a person to laugh along with his mistakes.

“I’ll be fine, thank you.”

“Okay.” He tripped over his feet as he walked away, and made a bad attempt at playing it off. “June?”

“I uh, I’m gonna sleep up here.” Juniper sounded as if there were cotton in her throat.

“Oh, I knew that. I only, um, I only meant, uh, I thought um, that you wanted to, uh, talk.” Christopher’s sentence came to a thankful halt.

“No, I’m tired. I’m gonna go to sleep, if that’s all right with you.”

“Of course.
That’s fine. We can talk tomorrow.” There was something more they both wanted to say, but neither of them said it.

Ashley knew
Christopher was going to sleep in the basement, but she wanted to know “Why don’t you sleep in a room up here?’

“The master suite is actual
ly on the main floor.”

“Okay, why don’t you sleep there, then?”

One foot was on the stairs. Christopher looked as though he didn’t want to answer any of Ashley’s questions.

Slowly, he said, “Down in the basement, it reminds me of my college apartment. I can work uninterrupted and sometimes I forget I’m in
this big house. I forget---,” He stopped, and quickly added, “I like it downstairs.”

Christopher
went down the stairs. After the basement door opened and closed, the girls walked to their separate rooms. It was five a.m. Ashley should have been exhausted but she wasn’t. She was bursting with more questions.

“Why are you helping me?”

Juniper didn’t face her.

“Because Christopher helped me, and now it's my turn to pay it back.”

It wasn’t a good enough answer, but after all, it was five a.m. Ashley dropped her other questions. Did it matter why Juniper had helped her, and was continuing to help her? She was lucky anyone was helping her at all.

They went into their guest suites, closing the doors behind them.

****

September 15
th

No.

God damn it.

Why
did he have to----

Why did she have to
----

You fucking
asshole. I hate you. I would kill you if I could.

Why am I writing in this stupid book?
Doesn’t matter. Nothing else matters.

No more.

Just…no.

* * * *

September 22
nd

It’s been about a week, and
I think I’m ready to write again. My last entry was probably confusing, and it’s no small wonder. I was in a bad place, an angry place.

Erin’s dead. She…

Okay, I may not be as put together as I thought. Crying now. Mommy, Daddy, I’m scared.

* * * *

Ashley put her new wallet
with her new life in it on the nightstand. She had stared at the birth date over and over, but the date wouldn’t stick. If someone asked her for the date off-hand, she would fudge it up.
I’ll be fine
, she lied to herself.

In a large oak dresser, she found sweat pants and
sleep shirts. Ashley wondered what other clothes might be in the suite.

The closet was a playground of colors and designs
. One side held frilly, silky, flowing clothing while the other had suits, jackets, and ties. The closet was outfitted for either a man or a woman. Christopher was very thorough in his wealth.

A closet full of new clothes didn’t hold the allure it would have the day before. The world was different, and clothes were of minimal consequence for Ashley. She stared at the clothes, seeing little more than rags on hangers. She shut the door without another thought.

Suddenly, she had an overwhelming urge to leave. Ashley’s stomach heaved, and she clutched at it with both arms. She was empty, and she was in a strange house with very strange people.
It’s only for a night. And you have no other choice.

Her inner adult was full of wisdom, but her lack of knowledge about her saviors made her uneasy;
Juniper was a prostitute, and Christopher was a rich computer tech with no worries about printing false identification papers for strangers. There were details that made Ashley less apprehensive about the two, like Juniper’s intelligence, bravery, and willingness to help a person in need. There was also the matter of Christopher’s demeanor. He was shy and kind, and more than handsome when he smiled. In truth, Ashley had a passionate crush on the man.

The anxiety that had crippled her diminished. Ashley realized she wasn’t holding onto herself anymore. She felt normal enough to yawn, and then s
he remembered what time it was. The nightstand read 5:30. Time for sleep.

She got into the queen-sized bed, luxuriously lost in a down comforter. This was a bedroom that she could trust to use the sheets
under
the comforter. Ashley pulled the blankets on and fell asleep as soon as her eyes were closed.

****

September 27
th

Alright, things feel a bit clearer. Pain is still large in my guts, but it’s not as blinding. I’m well enough to
write out what happened, and how.

On the last afternoon of her life, Erin left the kill room in tears
. Most times, she walked out with her head down, or wouldn’t look anyone in the eye, but she hadn’t left the kill room crying since our first few weeks in captivity. I asked her what was wrong, but she didn’t say. I noticed blood running down from her inner thigh.

She saw that I saw, and tried to cover it up with her skirt.

“Are you on your…period-thingy?”

My question brought on the angriest look from her I’d seen.

“No! Leave me alone!”

As she had for weeks, she ignored me the rest of the afte
rnoon. She was starting to remind me of Louise, or Mom. For hours at a time, she would rock on her knees, and stare. It was as if she were listening for somethin’, and considering what happened, I’m certain now that she was.

The Man took
Gabriella in the kill room with him next. When He finished, He went upstairs like always. Except that day He neglected a vital part in the routine, and Erin heard it when no one else did.

“He forgot. He FORGOT!” S
he screamed.

After her outburst, everyone was silent. They assumed she could be referring to things He had made her do only hours before, and they didn’t want to know.

“Forgot what?”

Michael and Erin
hadn’t spoken since their last encounter. He tone was insecure, but curious.

My sister was drunk with her delusions, and didn’t mind at all that Michael was speaking to her.

“He forgot to lock the fucking door!”

Everyone
understood what she meant then. All eyes shifted to the door at the top of the stairs.

“He couldn’t have left it open.” Marc said.

“How do you know it’s open?” I asked.

Erin hadn’t gotten up to check the door. She hadn’t left her spot on the floor for hours.

“There was no click. I listened.
A few weeks ago, he forgot, but I was too scared to say anything. But today, I’m leaving. No more of
that
.” She pointed at the kill room door. “No more.”

“We all would love to leave, but how could you consider it, knowing w
hat’s Outside?” Gabriella asked her.

“I don’t care what’s out there. I’m going!”

Erin crept toward the stairs, expecting me to join her. When I didn’t come right away, she whispered, “C’mon.”

“I can’t.” An image of the demon came to my mind. “I’m scared.”

“Damnit, get over here now!”

I didn’t budge. Louise put her hand on my shoulder to let me know she was th
ere. Erin was angered by Louise’s actions, and said so.

“He’s not staying he
re. His place with his family.”

Louise lifted her chin. She was still recovering from starving herself, but right then she looked strong.
“He can stay here with me. You can’t force him to go out there.”

“You’re just trying to get back at me for fucking
your husband, but you can’t stop me and my brother from leaving.”

The kid part of me wanted to cover my ears, but if Louise was being strong, I would be too. I couldn’t believe Erin was saying such ugly words to our friend.

Louise didn’t pick up the opening Erin had left for a petty argument.

“I won’t deny that we all have to leave here, even with the new dangers that face us
Outside.” She paused. “But, we should plan, prepare, and not leave on a whim. Let’s do this right, Erin. We should wait.”

Indecision flashed on my sister’s face, but her words were final. “No, I can’t.”

“If he left it open once, he will again.”

Louise tried to reason
, but Erin was past being sensible. She was already at the top of the stairs. One ear was pressed against the door, listening for Him. After a few moments, she tried the doorknob, and it turned.

I wanted to scream, “Don’t go!”, but I
was worried it would draw attention to her escape. Maybe I should have. It could have saved her life.

The door opened
without a creak, and Erin was free. She didn’t even turn around for a final look at me or to say goodbye. Leaving the basement was her main objective. Even me, her little brother, was low on her survival list.

I started to cry without a sound. I knew she wasn’t going to make it. I also knew that if she did, it meant I would never see her again. She was abandoning me.

Mommy. Daddy. Erin.

It took everything I had to cry quietly.

A few steps took her into the upstairs hallway. After that, we all lost sight of her. The silence was thick, until we heard feet were running, sliding; there were grunts and screams.

I
buried my face in Louise’s chest.

Finally, the Man came down the stairs, with Erin behind Him. He had her by her hair. My sister was crying like I was. She had a bloody knot on the side of her head.

In his free hand, The Man held a large knife. Once I saw that, I lost my pride and fear.

“Leave her alone! Please! Don’t hurt her!”

For an odd instant, He appeared moved by my request. He stood at the bottom of the stairs with Erin straining against his hand. To me, He looked…human.

That passed, and He made a quick decision. He slit Erin’s throat
. The blade slashed through her neck, as fast as a pen stroke and just as final. Blood sprayed in a warm arc, hitting me, Louise, and Michael.

The Man screamed, “This is the price.
Leave, and this is the fucking price! Trust me, this death was better than the one she would have found Outside. Did the cunt a fucking favor.” He dropped her, spitting on her corpse.

God, I can’t write anymore toda
y.

* * * *