A Good Dude (5 page)

Trisha was one of few friends Candace made since migrating to Texas. She lived in the apartment complex across the street from them.

“And I’ma do right,” Rilla went on. He cradled her belly in both hands. “I know I been screwing up. I ain’t did what I said I would, but this, this right here is going to make the difference. I feel motivated already. I’ma get my shit together, Candace. I swear. By the time he come, I’ma have my rap shit straight.”

Candace stared into his eyes, and she believed him. What choice did she have?

“It’s a boy, right?” he asked.

“I don’t know. I don’t think they can tell yet.”

“When can they tell? What the doctor say?”

“What doctor?”

“You ain’t been to the doctor?”

The tears had slowed, but they were on the verge of spilling again. “What doctor, Rilla? I told you, I don’t know anything about this. I don’t know how to go to a doctor.
It’s all messed up
. I told you—”

He smiled. “Calm down, baby. You all right. You prolly don’t need to start going to a doctor right now anyway. How far along are you?”

“I don’t know. At least three months.”

Rilla sat on the bed and stared at her kangaroo pouch. “Six months. I’ma have my little soldier in
six months
.”

“Or my little princess,” Candace said.

He looked up at her, happy to see she wasn’t crying anymore. “I’ll take a little girl,” he said. “But we still gonna name her Raul.”

She pushed his head playfully. “You’re not naming my little girl
Raul
.”

“Well, what you wanna name her?”

“I don’t know. I never really thought about it.”

“You still scared?”

“A little,” she admitted.

“Do you believe me, though? About how everything is gonna work out?”

She nodded.

Rilla kissed her belly button. “My little
vato’s
gonna be straight. Watch. He’s gonna have it all.”

Someone knocked at the door.

“That’s CC,” Rilla said.

Candace’s body stiffened, but he didn’t notice. “You finna go?” she asked.

“Yeah. We gotta make a few runs. You gonna be all right? You want me to stay with you? I will if you want.”

“No. Go ahead. I have classes today.”

“You sure you gonna be all right? I want you to be happy, baby. This is
good
news.”

“I’m happy,” Candace said. She painted on a crocodile smile, and he seemed to be convinced.

“Cool. Can you let CC in for me?”

Candace went to answer the door. CC stepped in looking a little scruffy. He was usually clean-shaven, but today he sported a scraggily goatee and had a few stray hairs on his cheeks.

“Where my boy at?” he asked.

“He’s in there getting dressed.”

CC looked her up and down. “What you doing today? Nothing? I’m surprised you woke this early.”

“I’m going to
school
,” Candace said, unsure why she was explaining herself to the likes of CC.

He nodded and grinned. “You learning something, or you still taking your basics?”

“You been to school?” she asked.

“Naw.”

“You graduate high school?”

“Naw, girl. I didn’t have to. I learned my math, though. That’s all I need to count this money.” He patted his bulging front pocket and Candace rolled her eyes.

“Rilla’s in the bedroom.”

“Straight,” CC said and disappeared down the hallway. Candace sat on the couch, but she could still hear their conversation through the thin walls.

“You ready, homey? We gonna lock the city down when we get this shit.” That was CC.

“Yeah. Hand me that shoe.”

“Nigga, you need to get some more shoes. What you doing what all yo money?”

“I know what I’m
gonna be
doing with it from now on,” Rilla said. “It’s time for me to get right, dog. I gotta get my music going for real. Candace pregnant. I’m finna have a little boy running around.”

There was a pause. Candace’s heart shot up in her throat as she waited for CC’s response.

“Candace pregnant?”

“Yeah. She just told me today.”

“You happy about that?”

“Yeah, cuz. Why? You know I want a little boy.”

“Yeah, but . . . .”

“But what, Cordell?”

“Nothing, Rilla. You happy, I’m happy.”

“Yeah, I’m happy, man. I love Candace. You know that.”

“Then we straight. We get a couple more big ones, and you can get yo music recorded. This yo restroom over here?”

“Yeah,” Rilla said.

CC appeared again in the hallway.

Candace looked over at him, her heart thudding in her chest.

CC gave her an evil glare and shook his head. He disappeared again, and she heard the bathroom door close.

She exhaled a pent-up breath. Her fingers were shaking. She held her hands together in her lap. CC didn’t tell him yet, but he and Rilla were going to be together all day. Candace figured he would drop the bomb at some point. She wondered if she should do it herself.

Rilla went to jail for a week about three months ago. He was only arrested for traffic tickets, but the judge said she was sick of seeing his face at arraignments. She made him do the time rather than allow him to pay the fine. CC came by the apartment often during that six-day stretch. His intentions were to look after his homeboy’s girl, but one night he brought a lot of weed and a bottle of hard liquor.

Candace either passed out or fell asleep at three in the morning. When she woke up, her pants were off and CC was on top of her. He was
inside
her. She would have told Rilla about it, but CC wasn’t the only one who made a mistake that night: When she awakened, Candace didn’t immediately push him off of her. She eventually did make him stop, but after how much time?

CC said she was awake for at least ten minutes. Candace thought it was more like thirty seconds. CC said she took her own pants off. He said she initiated the whole episode, as a matter of fact. Candace didn’t believe that to be the case, but how could she know for sure? If she told Rilla what happened, would he believe a girl he met at his concert five months ago or his best friend of ten years?

All Candace knew for sure was that her pregnancy coincided with Rilla’s week in jail. Maybe she got pregnant before he went. Maybe it was after he got out. It was too close to call.

* * *

Rilla gave her a nice hug and kiss on the way out. CC didn’t say anything to her, but that was pretty much the norm.

MAMA’S BABY, DADDY’S MAYBE

Candace got dressed and went to school thirty minutes after the guys left. She drove a 2008 Nissan Sentra. It was champagne-colored, sitting on chrome sixteen-inch rims. She wasn’t particularly impressed with big wheels, but Rilla put them on anyway. He said he wouldn’t feel right unless his girl was riding in style.

Rilla’s car was a 1994 Fleetwood Cadillac. He had twenty-inch rims on his flashy ride. Candace didn’t like big, bulky cars, but there were advantages to rolling around in the Fleetwood. She once fell asleep in the back seat and found plenty of room to stretch her legs out. Rilla once joined her back there, and there was plenty of room for everything else, too.

Overbrook Meadows Community College was only a fifteen-minute drive from the apartment. Candace hit the campus ten minutes early for her first class. After being accepted to prominent universities like Syracuse, Cornell, and Columbia, she felt a little odd paying for classes at a Texas community college, but running away from home didn’t mean Candace was running away from everything she believed in. Education had always been of upmost importance in her household. Getting drunk, high, and even pregnant didn’t diminish this motivation.

She had two classes today. Government was boring. As always, they sat and listened to the professor lecture for the whole period. He didn’t look up from his notes once. Her anatomy and physiology class was more interesting. They got to slice into baby pigs and label the colorful innards.

On the way back to her car, a familiar face approached Candace, but she couldn’t place him.

“Hey, your name’s Candace, right?”

She turned and watched a Hispanic man approach her. Actually, he was more like a boy; only eighteen, the same age as her. He was about Candace’s height, too. He wore a white golf shirt with faded blue jeans and white sneakers. He toted an armful of books rather than carry them in a backpack. Candace thought he had a baby face. He looked like a young Joey Lawrence, with the long hair to match.

“Yeah,” she said. “How do you know my name?”

“Hi. I’m in your Economics class,” he said, producing a hand for her to shake.

She shook it and smiled. “Sorry, I remember you now.”

“It’s okay,” he said. “A lot of people forget me. I was voted ‘
Most Likely to be Forgotten
’ in high school.” He smiled. It was a pleasant smile. He had nice teeth and pink lips. Candace grinned back at him.

“That’s pretty sad,” she said, “but I didn’t forget you. I just never knew your name.”

“I listened for yours when the teacher called roll,” her classmate said. “I don’t like to run up on people yelling, ‘
Hey, you
!’ ”

Candace giggled, still unsure why he approached her in the first place.

“Is this your first year here?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

“Where are you from? Did you go to high school here?”

“No. I’m from New York.”

“
New York City?
” he said, in an imitation of the Pace Picante Sauce commercials.

Candace laughed.

“So, you like it here?” he asked. “Met some nice people? Seen some sights?”

Candace was walking now, towards the parking lot.

The stranger followed. He didn’t have an accent at all. If not for his bronze skin, he could have passed for white. “I’ve been to a few clubs,” she said.

“Have you seen the stockyards?” he asked.

“No, but I heard about it. That’s the ‘
Cowtown’
part of the city, right?”