Working constantly until he was exhausted hadn’t helped either. Although he wanted her, he was also
scared shitless of what he was feeling. His bear was constantly on the prowl inside of him, growling
and wanting to emerge and hunt her down like a predator finding its prey. Why he had this infatuation
with a female that would be leaving Sweet Water was beyond him, and why did it hurt so damn bad at
the thought of her going away? He thought back to Charlie and wondered if this was how he felt when
he’d found Ary. He hadn’t spoken to his brothers about this, but maybe he should. Maybe then he
could make sense of why he felt so unbalanced. He thought fucking her that one time would ease this
pressure inside of him, but it turned out it made him just want her that much more. He was a fiend
when it came to Talia, and she was the only drug that could quench his insatiable addiction.
He set the lumber against the side of the building and went back for more. Sometimes he
stayed behind the scenes and worked with the architects on the blueprints, but the majority of the time
he did manual labor, trying to wear his body and mind out so much he just passed out. But in just the
three days since he met Talia he had needed more than just manual labor to help ease the frantic
feeling inside of him. No amount of working tired him. In fact, he seemed even more wound up after a
hard day’s work. It was as if he couldn’t control his bear, like the fucker wanted out to do whatever the
hell it wanted to.
“Hey, you okay, Ford?” Bram jogged up next to him. They both picked up a load of lumber and
made their way back to the frame.
“Yeah, I’m good.” He could sense Bram’s stare but didn’t bother looking over at his youngest
brother. After setting the wood down next to the first load and wiping the sweat from his face, he
finally looked at Bram. His brother sported a nasty looking black eye and a busted lip. “I should be
asking you if you’re okay.”
Bram grimaced but waved off Ford’s question.
“Nah, I’m good. Aside from the fact I got drunk and then decided to fight.”
Ford lifted his eyebrow and stared at Bram. “Is this one of those underground ones or just a
random bar brawl?”
“Random drunken fight at Slater’s, but what the fuck ever. The guy was asking for a beat-down
anyway when he thought he had bigger balls than me and decided to call me a pussy in front of his
girl.”
They headed back over for another round of lumber. It was no secret that Bram fought … a lot.
The youngest Wylde bear had a nasty temper, but it was more because his bear controlled him more
than his human side. The underground shifter fights weren’t a secret in Sweet Water, but no one, the
law included, fucked with them. Besides, Ford hated to think how his brother would be faring if he
didn’t fight and let off all that fucking animalistic tendencies he carried around inside of himself. It
wasn’t uncommon for shifters to get into underground cage fighting. Letting their inner animals out to
do some temporary destruction helped to ease the built-up adrenalin, testosterone, and overall
wilderness that resided in all male shifters. Blood was shed, bones were broken, and fur flew. It was a
spectacle that got all the males in the surrounding area rowdy for the bloody sport.
“You want to get drunk tonight, maybe pick up some chicks?” Bram wiped his brow and
shielded his eyes with his forearm from the sun. “I need to get laid, that or I need to find a fight, and
as you can see,” he pointed to his face, “the last time I got drunk and in a fight it sucked big balls. I’d
rather fuck.”
“I don’t think you need to fight either with your face looking beat to hell.”
Bram scoffed. “You should see the motherfucker that started it all. I bet his ass don’t come
around me ever again.” Bram cracked him knuckles and rolled his neck on his shoulders. “In fact, just
talking about that shit is getting me pissed all over again.” Ford could sense Bram’s bear rising up,
and knew a change of subject needed to be introduced or his little brother would end up destroying
something.
“So yeah, you up for going out with me or what?” Bram ran his hand over his sweat-soaked
hair, clearly waiting for Ford to answer. Banging some random chick had his dick shriveling up. All he
could think about was the image of Talia’s voluptuous body, of her big breasts shaking from the force
of fucking her, and of her lips parted and her breathy moans spilling out. He had never had a female
who left such a lasting impression on him, and never had he wanted a second chance with them. She
was an oddity to him, but something he wanted to explore more deeply. This little redhead changed
everything in the course of a few hours. Fuck, this wasn’t good, and he needed to cleanse her from his
mind, because obsessing about her like this was bordering on fucked-up.
“I don’t want a random fuck, but I could use a stiff drink.”
Fortunately, Bram didn’t question him on his lack of female company, and instead slapped him
on the back in approval. Maybe getting drunk would do him some good, but the more he thought about
it, the more a good fight sounded like an ideal energy reliever.
****
Dylan circled Ford, his muscles bulging as they prepared to shift. After they had gotten off
work they headed over Slater’s, the small hole-in-the wall bar that held the underground shifter cage
fighting in their basement. Now here was Ford, standing in the dank basement with a dripping pipe
running above him, the scent of mildew filling the must, damp air, and the muted noise of the music
above them. Ford pulled his t-shirt over his head and tossed it to Bram who stood on the sidelines
waiting his turn to throw some punches. Dylan, the lion shifter, cracked his neck and then his
knuckles. He grinned at Ford. There was enough alcohol moving through Ford’s veins that even if the
lion shifter got a hit on him, he would be too numb to feel it. He had drowned himself in liquor once
again, hoping to rid himself of these feelings for Talia, because frankly they were almost too much for
his shattered mind and heart to take in. Of course all of that alcohol only managed to make him want
her even more.
“I’m gonna fuck you up, bear.” Dylan ripped his shirt off, took his jeans off, and took a step
toward Ford. He was ready for this. He had Talia on his mind, and that was what needed to change,
because he needed to get rid of all this fucking energy she caused within him. He let the shift take
over, felt his bear move through his body until his muscles stretched, his bones broke and realigned,
and his bear pushed his human to the side. He stood to his full ten foot height and stared down at the
now shifted Dylan. The lion paced back and forth, and even though Ford was now in full bear mode, he
still felt the effects of the alcohol rolling through his system. He knew he could easily take a lion, no
doubt about it, but he wanted to feel pain. Ford needed his mind off other things, ones that had him
wanting to keep a certain foxy female by his side. Those were ideas he certainly didn’t want to play
with, and so the best way to deal with it was fight like there was no tomorrow.
They charged forward and met in the center. Teeth tore into flesh, claws ripped into muscles,
and blood sprayed out like a geyser coating the dull grey cement floor a brilliant red. Dylan dug his
claws into Ford’s belly, and he let out a roar of pain and relief. Ford had fought on a few different
occasions over the last ten years, needing that pain to numb his mind. He couldn’t explain this feeling
inside of him, but it was as if he was coming unhinged and about to combust. And it was all because of
this one female. It didn’t make any sense, and all he could think about was Charlie and his now
pregnant mate. His brother had been so unstable when he met Ary, and Ford had a suspicion he might
be going through the same situation as his older brother. Could it be that his bear recognized Talia as
his mate?
Dylan bit his shoulder, and Ford swiped his paw out, throwing the lion to his side. He might
have wanted to feel pain, but his thoughts were making him vulnerable and looking like a pussy that
couldn’t handle himself against a lion. Tilting his head back and roaring, he charged Dylan. The crowd
that surrounded them was loud and rowdy, calling out for more violence, wanting to see them tear
each other apart. It was exhilarating and painful, and to Ford’s disappointment didn’t lessen his
thoughts when they concerned Talia. He let his confusion, anger, arousal, and every other emotion he
felt for Talia wash through him and defeat the lion.
When it was all said and done and Dylan limped off to lick his wounds, Ford looked around,
needing another contender. Bram stepped up, placed his hand on Ford, which only had his bear
rounding on his youngest brother and growling. Bram held out both hands. Ford forced his bear into
submission. He was being uncontrollable and needed to calm the fuck down. He took a deep breath
and changed back into his human form. It was the same bone-snapping, muscle-tearing sensation.
Bram handed Ford his shirt and pants, and he quickly put them on, covering his now bloody
and torn flesh. “Fuck, man, you were intense out there.”
The crowd was still going wild as a tiger and panther shifter took the center stage. He was done
for right now, ready to pass out and get his bearings. He wanted to talk to Charlie, see if what he was
feeling was his confirmation on Talia being his mate, even though he was pretty damn sure that was
what in the hell was going on. Running a hand through his hair, which was wet with sweat and blood,
he let out a heavy sigh. Yeah, he was pretty fucking sure he had just found his mate, and even if there
was a part of him that feared what came with that, he knew his bear wouldn’t let her go. Hell, his
human wouldn’t let her go either, but the thought of claiming another female was like him stepping
off the end of the world and hoping his feet would touch land. He’d never thought he would find
someone again, but this wasn’t about his relationship with Mina. She hadn’t been his mate, and the
things he wanted with Talia made what he felt for Mina all those years ago seem like an adolescent
crush. The question he had for himself was: was he going to fight his bear and let the darkness that had
been so much a part of himself for so long take him deeper to despair, or give in and let himself
experience love again?
Fuck
. That was the million dollar question.
Passing out was not on the last list of what he wanted to do. He needed some advice, and his
older brother was the smartest male he knew. Charlie would help him sort this shit out, even if he had
never been completely honest on what had gone down with Mina. They left Slater’s, and Ford made a
call to Charlie. After talking to him briefly they headed over to their older brother’s cabin. Ford
needed a shower and sleep, but he was more worried about getting the confusion out of his head. Now,
an hour later, they sat around Charlie’s dining room table, a bottle of whiskey sitting in the center of
the table and shot glasses in front of them. Ford and Bram sure as hell didn’t need any more alcohol,
but what the fuck, maybe some liquid courage would make him confessing this easier. Charlie and
Bram stared at him, both with a little bit of anticipation on what he would say on their faces.
It was late as fuck, and Ary was sleeping upstairs. Ford felt guilty for coming to Charlie’s at
this hour, but he needed his brother’s interpretation on what the hell was going on. So that was what he
did, just spilled everything. The reason he and Mina broke up, the darkness that had consumed him for
so fucking long, and then everything he felt when he met Talia. For ten years he’d kept that shit with
Mina buried deep inside, but then this little red fox had come around and all hell had broken loose
inside of him. After all of that his brothers just sat there, staring him with mixed emotions.
“Everything feels so fucked up inside of me.” Ford took a sip of his whiskey, not really wanted
to throw that shit back to further numb what he felt. He waited not so patiently to hear what his
brothers had to say, specifically Charlie since he knew his older brother had felt this edginess inside of
him as well. Bram and Charlie stared at him, and although Bram looked somewhat shocked, Charlie
appeared thoughtful.
“Shit, man, I didn’t know the Mina situation had gone down like that.” Bram scrubbed a hand
over his jaw. “You should have told us. We would have helped you through it.” Ford knew this, but he
had been a coward and kept everything inside and to himself.
He looked at Charlie. “I’m real sorry about Mina and the fucked up shit she did, Ford.” Charlie
looked thoughtful and concerned. “Bram’s right, you should have told us. We would have helped you