A Flower’s Shade (29 page)

T
he Zhen Estate was gaily festooned, and everyone was preparing for the ceremony of Miss Yu's engagement. Huaifu directed the preparations with a gloomy, downcast expression. A strong man was clambering up to the high places and hanging great red lanterns. The preparations had already been going on for several days, and the long-awaited event was finally to take place. The old maid Miss Yu was to get married—this had been explosive news in the small town. Her upcoming marriage was being discussed everywhere, and because it had already been reported in the local newspaper, but Miss Yu deliberately made no declaration about who her intended was, which seemed affected and ridiculous. The Zhen clansmen believed that since she had never denied that she was to be engaged to Zha Liangzhong, ,he was evidently the only real choice with things as they stood. The Zhen clansmen had once again convoked a meeting, deciding unanimously that although the Zha Family had already declined and was now destitute, it was not unknown for prodigals to turn over a new leaf. In any event, many years ago, the Zha Family had been one of the most prominent families in the town. Now the Zhens could condescend to bring a Zha man into the family estate through marriage—on that basis alone, they ought to accept him. Besides, the Zhen clansmen understood that in reality they couldn't actually prevent Miss Yu from marrying whomever she chose. They could only let her follow her whims. If she had really chosen someone else, then that someone it would be.

Brimming with jealousy, Suqin appeared in the walkway. From some distance, she signaled to Huaifu as though she had something to say to him. Huaifu gave some instructions to the man who was hanging the lantern, and walked off towards Suqin. It was clear that Suqin didn't want anyone to hear what she had to say to Huaifu, and she gestured for Huaifu to walk with her. Both of them instinctively looked about to make sure; then they walked into Suqin's courtyard. As they were going in, Huaifu asked, "What did you want to tell me, sister-in-law?"

Suqin said nothing, she bowed her head and walked and only stopped when they were in the courtyard. Then she said bitterly, "What's the point of all this bother, why throw everything into an uproar, what is it but a moldy old maid getting married? It's not like she's in the original packaging, but she wants to make a big mystery out of it, as though if there was a secret to be kept, she acts like she's a princess taking her pick of the suitors, what's so wonderful about her, that guy's 's only interested in her property anyway!" Huaifu looked at her expressionlessly as she trampled on Miss Yu with any words she could find. "And my dear sister-in-law imagines someone really likes her." Suqin was sneering, guiding Huaifu into her room, expressing distaste with everything Miss Yu had done, "That's why everyone says that an old maid shouldn't be allowed to go astray, because once they go astray, the results are horrifying."

Huaifu, following Suqin into her room, saw Naixiang in his wheelchair as he came in. Ever since Ai'ai's death, Suqin had found a strong maidservant to take care of Naixiang. As Huaifu had come into the room, the maidservant had just noticed that Naixiang's diaper needed changing, so he saw her pulling Naixiang towards her, saw Naixiang falling onto the woman's lap, slobber dribbling from his mouth. Since he was always seated, Naixiang's behind had grown hideous, the bones of the buttocks had become deformed, and the smell of piss assailed his nose.

Suqin stood nearby, looking on with a little revulsion, fanning her nose, and only when the servant was finally done did she speak again. "Let me ask you, what date is my sister-in-law's wedding set for?" The question was casual, as though she didn't much care about the answer; then she immediately entered into another attack on Miss Yu. Ever since Liangzhong had told her the news about his upcoming engagement with Miss Yu, she really had become a mortal enemy of Miss Yu. Engagement, marriage—that's all pretense now. Hmph, now bedding comes before wedding. But I'm worried. Do you know what it is that worries me?"

Huaifu shot a glance at Naixiang. Naixiang was sitting there blankly, although it looked as though he was listening to their conversation. Suqin's jealousy had been too evident, and Huaifu felt that she was totally ridiculous. It would really be interesting if Naixiang could hear their conversation. A strange idea suddenly entered Huaifu's head—what if Naixiang wasn't at all the way people imagined him to be, what if he was only pretending, what if he were to turn suddenly back into a normal person, if the power of the Estate were to be once more in his hands—what would happen then?

Suqin noticed that Huaifu was distracted, she knit her eyebrows and said, "I'm doing this because Xiaoyun worries me. Huaifu, you may not know yet, but Xiaoyun has gone practically crazy these days. Just think, now he knows everything, he knows that your cousin is going to announce her engagement to Zha Liangzhong."

Huaifu was surprised at these words, and his mind was filled with confused thoughts. He had been dejected for the last few days. "How do you know that my cousin intends to marry Zha Liangzhong?" he asked, not entirely understanding.

"Either you really are that gormless, or else you're being disingenuous." Suqin said, staring at Huaifu as she sneered, "Who on earth doesn't know that much? How could you fail to be aware of it yourself? Your cousin's slept with Zha Liangzhong, don't you even know? Really, why try to pull the wool over my eyes? Let me tell you, Xiaoyun has always been a little obsessive, I'm worried that if he can't get over it, he may do something horrible once again."

As Suqin spoke, the confusion in Huaifu's mind suddenly resolved into a clue. Again his train of thought led him to Naixiang, the living corpse. If Naixiang were to fight back, what would be the result? Until now, everything that had happened was inextricably linked to Naixiang, he was in one way the bearer of responsibility for all these crimes, and at the same time he was the real victim of the Estate. Everyone had deceived him, everyone ignored his existence, ignored the strengths inherent in being a living corpse. Huaifu suddenly showed a curious tranquility, because Naixiang's stiff and rigid face had given him a very important realization. He felt that he had suddenly seen through something. "She'll marry whomever she wants to. What can Master Xiaoyun do about it?"

Xiaoyun is capable of anything when provoked—that's his character. His relations with my dear sister-in-law have gone far enough; I'm sure you know that as well as I do, for theirs is no ordinary relation. Just think, now that your dear cousin has chosen Zha Liangzhong, Xiaoyun may—he might do anything." Real concern now showed on Suqin's face. "He's always been stubborn as a mule; if he's really pushed to it…" Huaifu continued to stare at Naixiang's rigid, ridiculous expression, he was waiting for the peculiar gleam he had once seen in his eyes. Huaifu was imagining what kind of decision he would make if he were Naixiang. There was no hint of any change on Naixiang's face, and his eyes looked woodenly at a random place. "You asked me here so you could tell me that?" Huaifu discovered that he had found the only correct answer in Naixiang's expression. Coming at the subject obliquely, he said, "So what if Master Xiaoyun is stubborn? You think he'd dare do to her what he did to her brother, my cousin?"

Suqin's expression suddenly changed, she blanched, and her face became frightful. Seeing how his words had frightened her, Huaifu felt a mischievous pleasure. He realized that it was his turn now to toy with people. Ever since he had come into the Zhen Estate, Huaifu was always being toyed with. Nobody thought him of any account, everyone treated him like Miss Yu's houseboy, either ignoring him or talking to him any which way. Huaifu knew that although Suqin was excessively jealous of Miss Yu's marriage, in her heart of hearts she still wished for Liangzhong to marry into the Zhen Estate. In fact, as soon as Liangzhong and Miss Yu were married, Suqin and Liangzhong's illicit assignations would doubtless become much more convenient. Seeing that he had scared Suqin practically out of her wits, Huaifu said to her, without mincing his words, "I guess what you're afraid of, dear sister-in-law, isn't that Master Xiaoyun does anything to Miss Yu, but that Master Xiaoyun makes known what goes on between you and Zha Liangzhong."

"What about me and Zha Liangzhong?" Suqin stuttered.

Huaifu remained silent, feeling every kind of bittersweet emotion, but he had already decided on his next move. It would be a very vicious move, and he felt certain that it was a move that Naixiang had secretly conveyed to him. He laughed bitterly and said, "Sister-in-law, in this Estate, nothing stays secret long. Supposing Miss Yu found out—what then?"

X
iaoyun entered Huaifu's room. It was empty, without a soul. Examples of Miss Yu's calligraphy were pinned up everywhere, rustling in the breeze. A newspaper was on the desk, open to the page with the report of Miss Yu's engagement. Xiaoyun didn't know where Huaifu had gotten the newspaper from; he shot a glance at the newspaper and, furious, sat down to wait for Huaifu. The encounter with Liangzhong on the street a few days earlier again emerged before his mind's eye. As soon as he thought of Liangzhong's self-satisfied mug on that occasion, Xiaoyun felt that he would explode with fury.

Xiaoyun was now not only driven to distraction by his jealousy at Miss Yu's engagement to somebody else, he was also furious because of Miss Yu's unchasteness. Suqin advised Xiaoyun to leave the Estate on the quiet before Miss Yu's announcement of her engagement. Miss Yu wasn't a chaste woman to begin with, it was doubtful whether she was suited to be anyone's wife in the first place. It's a big world, and since Xiaoyun no longer wanted to stay in this corrupt Estate, why shouldn't he leave and go knock about again. Why should he have to live off the Estate, why should he refuse to leave? "Listen to your sister. Don't take it to heart, you're a big boy, you can take it, and you can let it go. Why get hung up on it, you're a man. In a matter like that, it's always the man who's has the best of the bargain." More than once Suqin had thus advised him, she had spoken eloquently, trying to find some way of dragging Xiaoyun out of the depths of his despair. "Xiaoyun, think of it way: the man who marries her now, is marrying a woman you've had your way with, so you have no reason to be angry. Quite the opposite, would you be willing to marry a woman that Liangzhong has already slept with? Really, when you think of it this way, what is there left to be angry about?"

Suqin's words could not be called unreasonable, and Xiaoyun repeatedly asked himself if he had really wanted to marry Miss Yu. Actually, Xiaoyun now deeply regretted that he had let Miss Yu drag him back to the Estate once more. Why had he come back with Miss Yu, just so that she could make fun of him again, so that she could toy with him again? It had always been a mistake to believe that Miss Yu could really love him. The amorous games in the Estate had always been slated to end in a cruel, tragic ending. Everything had been deeply problematic from the beginning. Evidently, he had been badly hurt; he felt now that he had been toyed with and cheated.

Huaifu appeared like a ghost behind Xiaoyun. He hadn't thought Xiaoyun would come. As the day of engagement approached, Huaifu became increasingly certain that he must not lose this opportunity. He felt that Naixiang was constantly communicating with him telepathically, grimly directing him to do this or that. He felt that he was acting in a correct and worthwhile manner. Xiaoyun was still sitting there, in a daze, while Huaifu coldly scrutinized his reaction. Just like Xiaoyun had realized that he had been toyed with and deceived, Huaifu felt that he had been beaten off like a dog, and he was now fully prepared to strike back.

Huaifu stood silently behind Xiaoyun this whole time. The room was very quiet, and the only sound was the fluttering of paper. All of a sudden, Xiaoyun began to turn around, and saw Huaifu standing behind him. Huaifu immediately put on his act of honest cluelessness, fearfully nodding at him, "Master Xiaoyun, what brings you here?" Xiaoyun stood up from the stool where he had been sitting. Standing, Huaifu was much the taller and much the stronger, but he was accustomed to assuming a low voice and a subservient attitude. The two rivals in love had nothing to say to each other, they only looked at each other, each making his own calculations. Xiaoyun didn't move, and forced light-heartedness to replace the pained look on his face. He asked Huaifu casually, "Hey, about your young lady—when is her big day with the eminent Mr. Zha, then?"

Huaifu answered respectfully, "Why ask me about a thing like that, Master Xiaoyun?"

Xiaoyun said, "If not you, then whom should I ask?"

Huaifu said, "What's the point of asking me?"

Xiaoyun sneered, "Of course there's a point of asking you, you follow Miss Yu around everywhere, how could you fail to know?"

Huaifu pondered this for a moment, then said, "I understand, Master Xiaoyun. You mean that I'm like a dog, always following my cousin about. You're quite right, I'm nothing but a dog. Not like you, Master Xiaoyun, who can even afford to lose your temper with her."

Xiaoyun was gripped by a sudden sympathy for Huaifu, he felt that he really was an unfortunate soul. As a man, Xiaoyun could never really understand why Huaifu should put up with the way Miss Yu tormented him. Why didn't he have any self-regard? Miss Yu had dressed Huaifu down more than once before Xiaoyun, and frequently got angry without any reason at all. Huaifu was a straightforward character, and Xiaoyun felt that she shouldn't treat him so harshly. "That's not what I meant. For your young lady, all men are dogs." Xiaoyun said with bitterness.

Huaifu took up the comment, and said unhurriedly, "If you've really understood that, then good. In any event, with her, there's no use in taking anything to heart, whether big or small. You know all about my cousin's bad temper, but one mustn't take it seriously. In her eyes, what are men? She really does think of them like dogs, you can tease them a little, today you're the favorite and she sleeps with you, and tomorrow it's another and she'll sleep with him instead. And there's no way of telling who'll become the favorite. You and I are different, Master Xiaoyun, you can go, you don't need to sit around the Estate and sulk, the sky is high and a bird may fly away. You've seen the world, not like me, I have a dog's fate, and I'm perfectly prepared to rot away in this Estate.