A Father's Promise (12 page)

Chapter Twelve

Z
ach clicked his mouse and sent the last email. As he looked at the clock on the wall, he heard voices in the outer office. Debbie’s rough laugh, Renee’s lilting reply.

As he got to his feet, the door opened and there she was.

The light from the outer office highlighted her hair, putting her in silhouette.

“Come on in,” he said, trying not to rush as he walked around his desk to her side.

As she closed the door behind her, he gave in to an impulse and pulled her close. Once she was in his embrace, he felt all the frustrations of his day melt away.

He inhaled the fresh scent of her shampoo as he brushed his cheek over her hair.

“Best part of my day,” he said, drawing back.

She smiled up at him, her expression radiant. “Best part of mine, too.”

“I didn’t call you just to hug you.” He laughed then pulled out a chair for her to sit on.

He perched on the edge of the desk across from her as she sat down, tucking her skirt around her legs.

“I asked you to come because I got good news. I just got off the phone with Freddy,” Zach continued. “He agreed to drop the lien. I got Benny and him to come to an agreement. Freddy will be signing off on the paperwork this afternoon.”

Renee nodded, and Zach was surprised at her restrained response. “This was what you wanted, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, of course. It was, but somehow, it doesn’t seem as important now that my mother doesn’t want to leave for Vancouver.”

She lifted one shoulder in a hesitant shrug, as if she didn’t dare say more than that.

“And I don’t know if I’m stepping over the line here,” she continued, “but my mother just told me that she and your father, well, they seem to be in a relationship.”

Zach only grinned, thankful that she now knew, as well. “You just preempted me. That was another of the reasons I wanted to talk to you, as well. Dad just told me. They must have made a decision to break the news at the same time. My dad is happier than he’s been for a long time.”

“My mother, too, but...” Her voice faded away as a frown wrinkled her forehead.

“But what?”

Renee looked directly at him, concern shadowing her face. “Does your father know what he’s getting into? As far as my mother’s care is concerned?”

Zach felt a hint of foreboding at her tone. “I don’t know. We didn’t talk about that.”

“It’s a major concern for me,” Renee said.

“Do you think you’re the only one who can take care of her?”

Renee’s frown deepened, and Zach wished he could take back what he’d just said.

“It isn’t just a matter of pushing a wheelchair now and again,” Renee said, the anxiety on her face now edging her voice. “It’s more than revamping a house to allow it to be accessible. There are health issues to deal with, daily care. I don’t know if he realizes—”

Zach touched her lips with his finger to stop her from saying any more. “He might not know the full extent of your mother’s care, but he’s a man in love, and he’s not irresponsible. I trust that he is going into this with his eyes wide-open.”

Renee bit her lip, as if still unconvinced.

“They’ll be fine,” Zach said. “And I’m sure whatever needs to be done, your mother will tell him, and what she can’t tell him, you can.”

“I suppose,” Renee said, but Zach noted the hesitation in her voice. Then she gave him a quick smile. “It’s just that I’ve been responsible for her care for so long, I can’t imagine just handing it over to someone else.”

“She’s an adult, not a child,” Zach reminded her.

Renee laughed. “You’re right. I tend to be overprotective.” She smiled at him again.

“Now then, I was wondering if you’re free on Thursday. There’s a play in Cranbrook I’d like to see.”

“My mother and I have a conference call with the therapy team in Vancouver on Thursday at five. I don’t think it will take long. I could call you when it’s done.”

Zach kissed her again. “I’ll be praying for you and your mother. Praying that you will be able to live with the decision she makes.”

She laid the palm of her hand against his face, her eyes glistening. “You are such a blessing to me. I feel like my life has fallen into a good place.”

“I feel the same. I think you need to know that I’ve never felt this way, even with Molly.”

Her smile shone like sunshine breaking through clouds. “I’m so thankful for you,” she whispered. “I hope Tricia will feel the same.”

“I hope so, too.”

“When do you think we should talk to her?”

“What do you mean?”

“About us,” Renee said, suddenly growing shy. “I’m sure she has some idea of what’s going on. Especially after Sunday.”

“Yes, I’m sure she does.” In fact, Tricia had mentioned how much they’d seen of Renee lately. “But I’m not so sure we need to move so quickly on that.”

“It’s not that quick. Not if...not if things are changing between us.”

Zach pulled in a long breath, realizing how this might look to Renee. “Maybe, but I need to be careful with Tricia.”

“Of course you do, but she’s also—” Renee stopped herself.

“Were you going to say that she is also your daughter?” Zach asked.

Renee held her hand up in a gesture of defense. “I was. But that was out of line. I’m sorry.”

“Of course,” he said.

But what she’d said was the truth. Now that it was spoken, it needed to be addressed.

Renee shook her head. “Please forget I said anything. Tricia is... I know she’s your daughter first. I have no claim to her....” Renee let the sentence drift away.

Zach wasn’t sure how to fix things between them, and when he leaned forward to give her a kiss, she drew away.

“Speaking of responsibilities, I should get back to the store,” she said, her voice tight. “I don’t like to leave Mom alone too long.”

Zach felt the sudden frostiness in Renee’s demeanor, and in spite of his confidence that he was doing the right thing, he knew he had hurt her.

He caught her hand and pressed a kiss to her palm. Then, as if to capture it, he curled her fingers around it and pressed them down.

“In case you might need it before we see each other again,” he said with a smile.

Renee looked down at her hand. “I won’t waste it,” she said with a wistful smile.

But she didn’t return his kiss as she left.

Zach watched her go, misgivings swimming at the back of his mind. This hadn’t gone the way it should have.

But what else was he supposed to do? He cared for Renee more than he had ever cared for anyone else, but Tricia was his daughter. He had to watch out for her.

He dragged his hands over his face. He knew he was wise to wait before telling Tricia, but at the same time, he felt as if he had made a misstep with Renee that would be hard to undo.

* * *

Renee sat in her office. Quiet. Alone.

It was Thursday. The day of the conference call with the therapist. The day that she had waited for for so long, it was permanently imprinted on her mind.

However, right now all she could think of was Zach and the confusion of emotions he created in her. Tonight they were going out on a date, and while she was excited, a small part of her struggled with her own emotions.

She hadn’t been able to stop her sorrow when Zach had said he didn’t want to tell Tricia about them. While her head understood the wisdom of his words, her heart knew that Zach was holding back. Keeping part of himself separate from her.

And, even more, keeping Tricia from her.

He’s a father,
she reminded herself.
He has to be sure.

But she’s your daughter.

She couldn’t lay claim to Tricia, though, and therefore, couldn’t expect Zach to honor that.

“Are you putting in an order?”

Renee’s mother’s voice broke into her thoughts.

“We’re getting low on glitter, ink, patterned paper, and we could really use some of the new Copic colors,” her mother said, hands resting on the wheels of her chair. “Now that we’re not selling the store, we’re going to need to do a large restock.”

“I know. That also means some large bills,” Renee said, turning back to her computer screen.

“But the bank account is healthier than it’s been in months, so I think we can afford it.”

Renee sat back in her chair, smiling at the changes her mother had made to her wardrobe the past few days, including today. The cream-colored T-shirt she wore was new, as were her pants. Her mother had looped a brightly colored scarf around her neck, enhancing the asymmetrical haircut Trudy at Hair Today had talked her into getting.

The highlights glinting in her hair, combined with her clothes, gave her mother a youthful and vibrant look, and as Renee held her mom’s shining gaze, she felt a pulse of gratitude for Arlan Truscott. He had given Brenda a shine to her eyes that Renee hadn’t seen since her father had been alive.

She was about to say something to her mother, when the front door of the shop flew open, the bell jangling.

“Renee? Renee? Where are you?” a voice called out on a sob.

Renee hurried past her mother, who had already turned to see what was happening. “Tricia?”

The little girl stood by the wooden front desk, her backpack slung over one shoulder, her ponytail askew, her cheeks shining with tears as she looked around wildly. She was clutching a book to her chest, and as Renee came closer, she recognized the scrapbook they had made.

“Sweetheart, what’s the matter?” Renee hurried to Tricia’s side.

Tricia threw herself into Renee’s arms, almost knocking her over, her sobs echoing throughout the store.

A group of younger women, pushing baby buggies, looked their way. Then one of the babies, sensing Tricia’s distress, started to whimper, as well.

“I’ll take care of the customers,” her mother said.

Renee nodded, taking the still-sobbing Tricia by the hand and leading her to her office. She closed the door behind them, then sat down on a chair and pulled Tricia close.

“What’s wrong, honey?” Renee asked. “Are you feeling okay? Are you sick? Should we call your dad?”

Tricia heaved out a few more sobs, then drew in a shuddering breath as she shook her head.

“Where’s Blythe?” Renee prompted.

“She...she’s be...behind me,” Tricia hiccuped. She swiped her cheeks with her palm, her other hand still clutching the scrapbook. “I’m supposed to go to her house tonight.”

So that Renee and Zach could go on their date, Renee realized.

Renee let the girl settle down a moment, then eased her into the chair beside her, grabbing the box of tissues from the desk.

“Tell me what’s wrong,” she said, tugging a couple free and gently wiping the little girl’s eyes. Her heart broke for her, and she wondered if she was missing her mother.

Tricia sniffed again, then looked down at the book she clung to. “My friends are mean” was all she said.

“How are they mean?”

“I brought my scrapbook to school to show my teacher. Then my friends wanted to see it, so I showed them. My one friend said that her mommy took lots and lots of pictures of her in the hospital and that I didn’t have any pictures of me inside the hospital, so I told her I was adop...adopted.” Tricia released another whimpering sob.

“But, honey, you’ve always known you were adopted,” Renee said, unable to quench the usual quiver of regret at the reality.

“I know, but my friend said that my mommy, my biological mommy, didn’t want me. That she gave me away.”

Tricia’s words stabbed at Renee’s heart with swift, sure strokes.

“But you know better, don’t you?” Renee asked, her words tentative, unsure in the face of this girl’s sobbing grief.

Tricia looked up at Renee, her teary gaze creating a deathly chill in Renee’s soul.

“My friend said my real mommy gave me away because she didn’t love me.”

Renee blanched at the cold, hard anger in Tricia’s voice.

Tricia’s eyes grew narrow as Renee pulled herself together. “My other friend said that my mommy is probably still alive.” Tricia drew in another quick breath, hitting the floor with her toes, her anger building with each kick of her black school shoes.

Renee struggled to find words to help this sweet little girl. “I’m sure your real mommy had her reasons. Sometimes mommies can’t take care—”

“I
hate
my real mom,” Tricia spat out, cutting off Renee’s explanation. “She didn’t love me. I hope I never have to see her. Ever. I
hate
her.”

Renee fell back against the chair, her world whirling around her with each bit of venom coming from her daughter’s lips.

She tried to breathe, couldn’t catch enough air.

Then the door to the office opened, and Blythe poked her head inside.

“There you are, you stinker,” she said to Tricia in a teasing singsong voice at odds with the heavy atmosphere in the room. “We should go. I have to help my mother with some grocery shopping before we go to my place.”

Tricia sniffled and stood up. Then without a backward glance at Renee, she left.

I hate my real mommy.

Those five words dragged out all the guilt and pain and sorrow that had been bottled up for years.

Renee pressed ice-cold hands to her face, trying to center herself, struggling to know how to handle all her emotions.

Swirling through the center of them was one thought.

Zach was right.

She was glad they hadn’t told Tricia.

Was that only a few minutes ago that she had so looked forward to seeing Zach? Was that flash of happiness the last one she would ever experience? She was dimly aware of the noises beyond the back room, her head still ringing with Tricia’s words.

“Renee?”

Her mother tapping at the office door broke into Renee’s jumbled thoughts. She blinked and inhaled, not wanting Brenda to see her anguish. “What is it?”

The door opened and her mom wheeled herself inside, frowning at Renee. “What’s going on? Why are you hiding in here? Where’s Tricia? I thought you were still talking with her.”

Renee held up one hand, forestalling further questions. “Not now, Mom.”

“What do you mean, ‘not now’? You’ve been sitting here for over twenty minutes. I thought you were busy in here with Tricia, and now I see she’s gone.”