A Daughter's Disgrace (4 page)

‘Good weekend, Nev?’ asked Nobby on Monday morning. ‘Were you out down the pub? Making the most of your final months being young, free and single?’

Neville rubbed his eyes. He didn’t want to admit it but working back-to-back shifts over the past couple of days had been more tiring than he’d thought. He’d had hardly any sleep and, worse still, he’d hardly seen Hazel. But it was going to be worth it, to give her the wedding she so badly wanted. ‘Did a spot of overtime,’ he said. ‘Saves me spendin’ the cash down the boozer.’

Nobby raised his eyebrows. He didn’t believe in working weekends. Nothing kept him from the pub on Friday and Saturday nights; that was the whole point of going to work – to have the money to sink a few pints with his mates. ‘Don’t you go wasting your youth,’ he told the younger man. ‘These are the best years of your life, these are. Plenty of time for overtime when you’re hitched.’

‘I’ll bear that in mind,’ said Neville, keen to get away from Nobby, who he found annoying at the best of times, even when he wasn’t half-asleep on his feet. He turned to hang up his coat. ‘Right, back to me usual station.’ He dragged himself over to his bench.

Nobby pulled a face. Seemed as if young Neville wasn’t cut out to be the life and soul of the party after all. ‘Suit yourself,’ he muttered.

‘What’s up?’ asked Bill, unwinding his scarf in Chelsea colours.

Nobby shook his head. ‘Probably nothing,’ he said. ‘That Neville’s missed a weekend down the pub so he could do overtime. Funny way of enjoying yourself, ain’t it?’

‘That’ll be his bird,’ said Bill. ‘I bumped into her last week down the market and she said he was going to do more shifts. They’re saving up.’

‘Bloody hell, he don’t want to be dancing to her tune already.’ Nobby didn’t like the sound of that. ‘Time enough for all that, that’s what I told him.’

‘I take it you were down the Queen Vic as usual, then,’ said Bill, not wanting to start the week with Nobby in a bad temper. ‘I went to the game. Bloody freezing it was too.’

‘That’s why you want to spend your weekend in a nice warm pub,’ Nobby told him. ‘You take my advice next time and read about your game in the paper somewhere where you can sit by the fire and have a drop of beer.’

‘That’s called my own front room, mate,’ said Bill cheerfully. ‘But love my mum as I do, you can’t beat the terraces on a Saturday. We’ll agree to differ, shall we?’

Nobby pretended to agree. But he wasn’t happy.

Cora stood on the sawdust-covered floor of Fred Chapman’s butcher’s shop, nodding her head in approval. ‘You ain’t done bad for yourself even with all the upset of your mum passing away,’ she said. ‘You keep this place in good nick, I’ll say that much.’

Fred nodded as he wiped his hands on his butcher’s apron. He could tell it was tighter than ever but try as he might, his waistline kept on growing. Not like Cora. She was skinny as a rake, always had been. ‘Now you need feeding up a bit,’ he said. ‘How about a nice piece of brisket? Or some chuck steak?’

‘My girls would be thrilled,’ said Cora. Usually she would have offal or oxtail, and make it go further by cooking lots of pearl barley or potatoes with it. What a good job Fred had needed that pack of cigarettes when he did.

‘Look, you can have this bit and I’ll add the rest of the tray as well.’ Fred leant over the counter and began putting the bright red meat into a bag. ‘This was left over as a customer ordered it but never turned up. So you’d be doing me a favour.’ It was a lie but Cora didn’t need to know that. He could tell she wouldn’t want charity. ‘And how are the girls? They must be all grown up now.’

‘Linda’s married, living down in Kent, and got a three-year-old,’ said Cora, her face lighting up at the thought of her beloved June. ‘She’s done well for herself. Hazel’s just got engaged, nice enough boy but never going to set the world on fire. Still, he loves her and that counts for somethin’. As for Alison …’ She looked heavenwards. ‘May God forgive me, I don’t know what to do with that girl. She’s seventeen now. She’s not long got the push from the factory she was at and can’t get nothing else, just when we got the expense of the wedding to cope with. She don’t seem to have no get up and go. Just sits around moping.’

‘Really?’ Fred tried to think of the last time he’d seen Cora’s daughters. It would have been well before his mother had her final illness. Even so, he didn’t remember Alison being useless. He could tell from Cora’s expression that this was a sore point and didn’t want to get himself involved in something he’d regret; it wasn’t like him to make rash decisions. But the coincidence seemed too good to miss.

‘Really,’ Cora said bitterly. ‘Though I says it as shouldn’t, she’s got no vim at all. I can’t understand who she takes after. You know what Jack was like.’

‘I do,’ said Fred at once. ‘He was a good man, Cora, a man in a million. He was like a big brother to me and I know how tough it was for you when he was killed.’ He paused and made up his mind. Jack had stood up for him on many occasions when he was growing up; now was his chance to pay him back by helping his family. ‘I just found out my shop girl is leaving Battersea. Says her folks want to get away.’

‘Can’t blame them,’ said Cora instantly. ‘I’d do the same if I could.’

‘But it leaves me short,’ Fred went on. ‘I can’t run this place on my own, not and keep up standards. I don’t know if your Alison would be interested, but I need someone to start tomorrow. She wouldn’t have to know the business, I could teach her everything. I just need someone I can trust, and I could trust her, couldn’t I?’

You could trust her to spoil your day, Cora had to stop herself from saying. Then she gave herself a shake. This was an ideal offer. It might not bring Hazel the wedding dress of her dreams, but they would all eat better than they’d done for years and it would get Alison out from under her feet. ‘I have to warn you that she ain’t improved in looks or temperament at all,’ she said. ‘She might scare off your customers so you’ll want to keep her out the back. But credit where credit’s due,’ she added, hoping she hadn’t said too much and made him change his mind. ‘She’s reliable, that’s what her reference says.’

‘There you are then,’ said Fred. ‘I don’t need someone with film star looks round here. If she can add up orders and sweep a floor, that’ll do me to start with. And from what I remember she’s a bright girl.’

‘Well, I’ll get her to come down tomorrow and you can see if she’s suitable. She should be very grateful. You’re a good man, Fred Chapman, and don’t think I don’t know it.’

‘So we’ll be happy all round,’ beamed Fred. ‘You get that nice bit of beef home and have a slap-up meal. I’d stew it, myself. Tasty as can be when it’s stewed. And I’ll see your girl tomorrow.’ As Cora saw herself out, Fred hoped he’d done the right thing. But surely the daughter of his old friend couldn’t be all bad. Her mother was just tired. He knew how difficult it was to be cooped up with a family member all day every day. As for the girl, he’d find out soon enough what she was really like.

‘A butcher’s?’ said Alison as they were sitting at the dinner table that evening.

‘What’s wrong with that?’ demanded Cora. ‘There’s no room for you to be la-di-da, it’s a good honest job so make sure you’re there first thing tomorrow.’

‘But I don’t know anything about it,’ Alison said. She was terrified of the idea. A shop – talking to people who’d be whispering about her as soon as her back was turned. What if she got it all wrong? And there would be blood from the meat everywhere.

‘What do you need to know about it?’ Hazel was scornful. How typical of her sister to make a fuss before she’d even started. ‘You ain’t got to kill anything. You just shove it in bags and take people’s money. Even you must be able to manage that.’

‘But the blood …’ Alison began.

‘Don’t tell me you mind a bit of blood,’ Cora said. ‘You know where meat comes from. You’re happy enough to eat it.’ She looked pointedly at Alison’s empty plate. They’d all enjoyed the stew. Fred had been right – it had been a very tasty piece of beef and they hadn’t eaten that well for ages.

Hazel wasn’t going to back off. ‘You know we need the money. And you haven’t exactly been flooded with job offers, have you? So that settles it. End of.’ She got up to help clear the table. ‘Come on, pass me your plate. I’m in a hurry as I’m going to see Neville. He’s got a night off at last.’

Alison was silent as she did as she was asked. She tried to remember what Fred Chapman was like. She’d seen him when she was little but that wasn’t much help. Had he brought them sweets? It might have been someone else. Yet it was a rare enough event for it to have stuck in her memory.

‘Don’t just sit there, help your sister,’ snapped Cora.

Alison slowly got to her feet. ‘Did Fred once bring us sweets when we were kids?’ she asked.

Cora thought for a moment. ‘Don’t know. But it’s the sort of thing he’d do. He’s a kind man, Fred is. You’re lucky.’ Then she laughed. ‘At least you won’t be struck dumb by his good looks. He’s shorter than you are, twice as wide, nearly bald and wheezes like he’s just run all the way from the park up to Clapham Junction.’

‘You’ll be the perfect pair!’ crowed Hazel. ‘Short fat Fred and long tall Alison with the face that could sink a thousand ships. You’ll draw the crowds, you will. People will come for miles.’ She finished stacking the dirty dishes. ‘There you are, your turn to wash up. I’m off.’

‘Maybe I’ll be good for business then,’ Alison said, trying to persuade herself that this might turn out all right, despite her sister’s comments. ‘I must be good for something.’

‘First time for everything,’ said Cora dismissively.

Falcon Road was busy, full of people going to work, heading for Clapham Junction or coming from there, or waiting for buses to take them up the hill. Alison huddled in her gabardine mac, wishing she’d put on her worn-out coat, which although shabbier, was slightly warmer. Would it be any better in the shop? If there was raw meat around it would probably be cold. Just what she needed on a day like this. As she reached the door it started to rain and she hurried inside, chilled to the bone.

At once she was hit by the smell. It made her want to run outside again. But before she could turn to leave, Fred Chapman came through the plastic curtain that divided the shop area from whatever lay behind and smiled in welcome. She was trapped.

‘Alison! Well, look at you,’ he said, looking up at her – he was quite a bit shorter and she could see the top of his nearly bald head. ‘Grown so tall! I hope we can get you an apron to fit. The last assistant was much smaller than you.’

Marvellous, thought Alison. I’ve done something wrong already. What a good start.

But Fred was fussing round and found something he thought would do. ‘You take this and come through to the back. We won’t open until nine so we’ve time for a cup of tea and to get you settled in.’ He pushed his way through the curtain and gulping, trying not to breathe too deeply, Alison followed him.

There were two enormous fridges on the right but on the left, a door led into a surprisingly cosy room. A gas fire was on full and Alison was irresistibly drawn to it, holding out her red hands to warm them. Fred was making himself busy at a small counter in the corner, where there was a kettle and various tins. ‘Tea, sugar, and the milk’s in here,’ he said. ‘This big one’s for biscuits. Fancy a digestive to settle your stomach?’

Alison nodded. ‘How did you know?’

‘Happens to lots of people,’ said Fred. ‘You get used to the smell, you know. I’ve just been separating some cuts of meat. So that’s what you smelt when you came in. Can’t tell in here though, can you? So if it gets too much to start with, you come in here. Here’s your tea.’

‘Thanks, Mr Chapman,’ said Alison, shyly sitting down, wrapping her hands around the mug.

She helped herself to a biscuit and began to feel better.

‘You’d better call me Fred,’ said Fred. ‘Otherwise I shall be getting above myself. We won’t do too much today. You can just watch me and get to meet some of the regulars. You probably know lots of them.’ Alison was dreading having to come face to face with so many people every day, but said nothing. She knew that everyone whispered behind her back as soon as they saw her – somehow she’d have to deal with it as best she could. ‘You might weigh me out some sausages in a bit. That won’t be too bad, will it?’

‘No,’ she said. ‘I think I could do that.’

Fred gave Alison all the easy things to do in the morning, showing her how to use the big scales, the till, where the change was kept and what went where in the giant fridges. He kept her away from where the big carcasses were hung and didn’t ask her to cut anything except sausages. He was quietly surprised at how quickly she seemed to pick things up and assumed her nervousness was down to being new at the job. He had no idea how awkward she always felt around people. She’d much rather stay in the back where no one could see her.

Alison avoided any of the building beyond the fridges as she had no wish to see the raw, bloody meat any more than she had to. By the time it made it to the front of the shop it was in smaller chunks and just about bearable, not so different from the kitchen at home. She was afraid Fred would ask her to try the big slicer on which he cut the ham and corned beef wafer thin, as it looked like a quick way of losing her fingers, but he didn’t. She also managed to avoid most of the customers to begin with but by mid-morning, trade was hotting up.

‘Oh, so this is where you’re working now, is it?’

Alison had seen a woman come in wearing a large plaid headscarf against the rain but hadn’t realised it was Winnie Jewell. ‘Hello, Mrs Jewell,’ she said, smiling weakly.

‘Dress shop didn’t work out then?’ demanded Winnie, pulling off the scarf and sending a shower of raindrops onto the sawdust on the floor.

‘No, no, that was no good …’ Alison began, embarrassed at the memory of the horrendous interview.

‘Can’t say I’m surprised,’ Winnie said. ‘They’re very posh in there.’ She gave Alison an appraising look.

‘Well, their loss is my gain,’ said Fred grandly, passing behind the counter with a tray of something shiny Alison didn’t want to examine too closely. ‘What can I get you today, Mrs Jewell? Your usual kidneys?’

Alison took the opportunity to escape through the plastic curtain. She was sure that Winnie Jewell had set her up to fail and had come in here to rub it in. She could hear Fred making conversation with the woman – he had her eating out of his hand. Good, let him deal with her.

The shop door banged shut and Fred came through to find her. ‘So you know Mrs Jewell?’

‘Yes.’ Alison wondered what was coming next.

‘Maybe you’d like to stop and talk to her next time then,’ suggested Fred.

‘Maybe.’

Fred shook his head. ‘Treat them well and they’ll come back for more. It don’t matter what she might have said or done before, she’s a customer now and that’s different. Remember that. You’re wearing that apron – that deserves respect.’ He looked her in the eye and she felt as if she was shrinking. ‘Come on then. If you can quickly sweep up that wet sawdust and put down new before the lunchtime rush begins, we can think about what we’ll have for our own lunch. Did you bring anything in?’

Alison hadn’t even thought about that. ‘No, I didn’t know …’

‘That’s all right then,’ said Fred. ‘I expect you don’t fancy a steak and kidney pie?’ Alison nearly gagged. ‘How about you go up the road for fish and chips for both of us? On me, for your first day.’

‘That would be lovely. Thank you very much, Mr Chap … Fred.’ Alison was relieved. She risked a small smile. Her nerves had made her hungry and she had only just noticed, but the thought of meat in any shape or form would have been unbearable.

She quickly swept up the old sawdust, now soggy and lumpy, and put down fresh before any new customers could come in. Then she grabbed Fred’s money and her mac. She stopped outside the neighbouring shop’s awning to fasten it against the rain, which was still falling hard.

Someone stepped out from the doorway. It was a young man in the brown overalls of the ironmonger’s. Alison immediately noticed he was good-looking – not as good-looking as Neville, but his hair was very dark and so were his eyes. He was shorter than her, but so were most people. He took a second glance at her and grinned.

‘You working next door?’ he asked.

‘That’s right.’ Alison didn’t want to appear shy so kept her answer short. She was taken aback that he had bothered to speak to her at all.

‘We’re going to be neighbours, then. I work in here. I’m Paul, by the way.’

‘Hello, Paul, I’m Alison.’

‘Going out in this weather?’ he teased. ‘I wouldn’t send a dog out in that.’

Alison moved a little closer to him to avoid the rain that was being driven sideways under the awning, almost afraid of her own daring. ‘Going to get Mr Chapman’s lunch,’ she said.

‘Got you at his beck and call, has he? You want to watch that. It’ll be unpaid overtime next,’ said Paul, with an air of authority.

Alison could feel herself blushing. ‘No, it’s not like that. He’s a very good boss. I’d better be off.’ She straightened her shoulders and forced herself out into the downpour.

Paul watched her go. He’d noticed how she blushed when she came closer to him and then was in a hurry to get away. He’d only been in the job two weeks himself and had been bored witless for most of that but now it looked as if there might be some fun to be had. If she was that shy after such a brief conversation then she couldn’t be very experienced with men. With looks like that he bet most lads of his age avoided her. Well, for him at least, things had just got much more interesting on Falcon Road.

Alison was impressed. Fred had installed a Baby Belling oven in the cosy side room and so his fish and chips could keep warm while she ate hers; they couldn’t eat together during the busy lunch period. She sat in the armchair next to the fire, finishing her chips. This might not be so bad after all. Fred had been as kind to her as Betty Shawcross at the factory, and slowly she began to feel that she might not fail at this new job. As long as she could stay away from the carcasses she’d be all right.

Fred came through from the shop and put on the kettle. ‘I’m starving,’ he said. ‘Are you all right to go out the front for a bit on your own? If there’s anything you need then shout.’

‘I’ll be fine,’ said Alison, getting to her feet.

While the next half an hour was busy, it was mostly people she didn’t know or who were vaguely familiar faces – none of those who’d taunted her so regularly. They usually wanted something quick for this evening’s tea. Now she understood why she’d spent much of the morning weighing sausages: nearly all of them wanted a pound or half a pound, and all she had to do was reach for a bundle she’d separated earlier and put them in greaseproof paper. This was easy. Now and again she even talked to customers beyond ‘can I help you?’ Maybe this would all work out. And there was that nice-looking man next door who hadn’t been rude to her. Slowly she began to relax a little.

Fred finished his fish and chips and came through the door just as Marian Dalby came in. Alison knew who she was – Neville had talked about her, saying his foreman was married to the best baker in Battersea, and didn’t have a bad word to say about her. She looked as if she enjoyed plenty of her own cakes, as she was plump and round-faced, smiling even though her coat was wet. ‘Mr Chapman!’ she exclaimed. ‘I see you’ve found yourself a new assistant. Let me see … you’re Hazel Butler’s sister, aren’t you?’

‘That’s right,’ Alison said. ‘She just got engaged to Neville Parrot, who works at the paint factory.’

‘That explains why my Frank came in so late from the pub recently,’ said the woman, shaking the raindrops from her curly hair. ‘He said they’d been toasting the young couple. Well, he seems like a nice lad. Now, Mr Chapman, I’m laying on some food for my brother’s birthday and I’ll be needing some pork chops. What can you do for me?’

‘I have the very thing for you,’ said Fred instantly, ‘but I don’t have many out front. Alison, could you fetch the rest? Out the back, the room on the right past the fridges, you’ll see a big box with a red lid. It’s not heavy.’

Alison set off into the back of the building and found the right door, just after the opening to the yard. It was much colder out here. She sniffed as her nose threatened to drip, then opened the door.

The smell hit her at once: the smell of blood but far stronger than she’d ever come across it. Hanging from the ceiling were the dead animals, with their shiny red flesh and yellow fat all exposed. The lifeless head of a pig almost brushed against her as she gasped in horror. Choking, she slammed the door and ran towards the yard. She threw open the big wooden door and made it outside just in time before her guts heaved in terror and she was violently sick.