A Dark Tide (Book of One) (5 page)

"It is too dangerous," she said. "If you face the dark god now, before you have learned what you must, I fear you will fall to the shadow."

"You would be surprised at what I have learned," Aaron said, and though his words seemed as though they should be sarcastic, his tone was subdued and sorrowful.

"It is true," Ehlena said. "The Ansari have taught you many things, but there are other things you must learn if you are to defeat the shadow."

"I do not speak of the Ansari," Aaron told her. "I speak of Stroma, the god. I have seen many things in his thoughts."

Ehlena took a step back from him.

"Do not worry," Aaron told her. "He cannot harm you, and he would not. It may be his greatest regret, what he did, or tried to do to you."

"Stroma endures?"

"A part of him, yes," Aaron said. "His power is gone, and what remains is knowledge and his thoughts, but they are beginning to fade."

"How much of Stroma's knowledge have you learned?"

Aaron shrugged. "Many things, memories, thoughts. Very little to do with magic, other than how to destroy the books."

"Good," Ehlena said. "Does he speak to you in your thoughts?"

"He tries to."

"But you do not listen."

"I am done listening," Aaron said. "The things that would be most useful to me, no one will tell me, and the things I have learned have shown me that I have been lied to, manipulated and deceived by many, but I have accepted these things, and I am not angry."

"I have never lied to you," Ehlena said.

Aaron stared at her for a moment, his gaze penetrating her, as though he was looking right through her.

"I also learned many things about the Lady when Stroma's thoughts entered mine," Aaron told her. "I do not think he intended for me to see such things, but she is often at the fore of his thoughts. I now understand why some call her Lady Luck, but the truth is not so much because she brings luck, but because she manipulates so many things, and she can hear any word that is uttered and any sound that is made in the world. That is quite a power, to know just about everything and to be able to affect things anywhere, especially in small ways that might not be noticed. What would it take to change a person's path? A gust of wind knocks a tree down, blocking the road, and one might walk in a different direction, on a more pleasant journey, or perhaps on the road to ruin. Was it merely the wind, or was it the hand of the goddess? It is hardly luck."

"That is the focus of my power," Ehlena told him. "And when I hear things, would you rather I do nothing?"

"I would rather you wouldn't manipulate me," Aaron said.

"I haven't and I would not," Ehlena replied, her temper growing sharp.

"So the windstorms that swirled around my path in the desert were not your doing?"

Ehlena's words caught in her throat.

"I was only trying to hide you from the god and the shadow," she told him. "There were some things I had to do and I wanted to talk to you before the dark god sought you out. I am trying to help you, Aaron."

"I appreciate it, Ehlena, but I do not want your help." Aaron tried to gentle his words, but they still came out harsh. "I will find the last copy of the book. Thanks to the knowledge of Stroma, I can feel where it is, and when I find it, I will destroy it and the others, then we can free the mages and the people of Maramyr."

"And what about the dark god?" Ehlena asked. "What about the shadow?"

"I will kill Cerric and the god within him," Aaron replied.

"Cerric is dead, Aaron, but the dark god endures," Ehlena told him. "Calexis now rules with the power of the shadow."

"Cerric is no more, but the god has chosen another," Aaron commented, contemplating what had happened. "This power of gods, to become one with others, it is curious, but it is no matter. Gods can be killed, and once this god is dead and the people are free of the magic of the book, the kingdom will be restored, and once the shadow has been stopped, all will be as it should."

"The shadow cannot be destroyed so easily, Aaron," Ehlena told him. "Of all the things you might have learned from Stroma, you must know this."

"Stroma has a lot to say about the shadow," Aaron told her. "I will find a way."

"How?" Ehlena asked, her voice rising in frustration. "If you know about the shadow, then you know what must be done. And if you aren't strong enough, you will only make the shadow that much more powerful."

"I know the danger," Aaron said. "But there has to be another way."

"Once the shadow has gripped the land, once that power has taken hold, there is only one way to destroy it," Ehlena said.

"That is why I must go, for if I wait any longer, it will be too late."

"And if you fail?"

"Then nothing has changed," Aaron said. "If I fall to the shadow, you and the others will have to kill me and use my power to destroy the shadow."

"I don't want that, Aaron," Ehlena said, her voice raw with sadness and frustration, partly from the thought of such a thing coming to pass, and from not being able to warn him of how much danger he might pose if the shadow were to claim him.

"Then wish me luck," he said, trying to smile.

"That isn't funny," she said. "And I don't care about the power of the goddess. I might be different than I was but I am still me, and I care about you."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to say it that way." Aaron kicked himself inwardly. "It is a strange thing to have the thoughts of another echoing in your mind, but I think I am beginning to understand now how you are the Lady but you are also still Ehlena."

"What about Stroma? Is he part of you now?"

"No," Aaron replied, and he pointed to the side of his head. "He is here, but his essence is fading and he will soon be gone. I suppose I should tell you, Stroma would like to apologize to you."

Ehlena frowned.

"Does he think I would accept his apology?"

"No," Aaron said with a sad laugh, which Ehlena found strange, for it was something that the god might do, and she realized that Stroma was speaking to Aaron in his thoughts. "Stroma says he is truly sorry for what he did, whether you accept it or not."

"He broke his promise," Ehlena said. "He broke the covenant, the oath we made."

"I know," Aaron told her. "I have learned enough to know why he did it, but he is truly sorry for it."

"There is nothing I can say. I cannot forgive him."

"Then don't," Aaron said. "I don't forgive him either, but he is stuck inside my thoughts and he wanted to apologize to you, so I have done that for him."

"Did Stroma tell you the same things that I am trying to tell you, that it is too dangerous to go to Maramyr?"

"He did," Aaron replied. "And almost with the same words, though he said a few other things as well."

"Like what?"

"The reason he sought to take my power," Aaron said. "He was weakened and he wanted to use the truefire within me to burn away the shadow."

"It is the only way to destroy it," Ehlena said.

"Is it?" Aaron asked.

"It is the only thing that destroyed the shadow in the past."

"But it didn't," Aaron said. "The shadow merely retreated, and now it has returned. Once the books are destroyed, I will find a way to stop the shadow."

"How, if not with truefire?"

"I didn't say I would not use it, but there has to be a way to do it without destroying everything. I saw what it was like in Stoma's memories and I now know he would do it all again, destroying everything in his path to stop the darkness. I don't want that. There has to be another way."

"But if you fall under the power of the shadow, then you want me and Stavros and the others to come and kill you." Ehlena's tone was cross, but mostly out of frustration.

"I won't let it happen," Aaron said, though he was not entirely sure of himself.

"I don't want you to go," Ehlena said, breathing out a sigh as she took a step toward him, and she touched him gently, placing her hand on his arm.

"I know," Aaron said. "I don't want to go either, but I have to. I was born with a power that has caused a lot of trouble, and now I can use it to make things right."

"I saw it, Aaron," Ehlena said, "In your memory, when we were at Meer Island together. Just like you saw Stroma's memories, I saw the fire from when you were a child. You must understand, Aaron, it wasn't your fault."

Aaron stared at her, not sure whether to be angry or relieved that she knew what he had seen when the ward had been removed from his mind and his memories returned.

"Maybe not," he said. "It was still my power that burned them."

"You were only a babe," Ehlena insisted. "You were but a swaddling infant."

"One that should not have been born," Aaron said darkly. "This kind of power is too dangerous, and it would have been better for everyone if I had died all the way back then, or never been born in the first place."

"No," Ehlena said, determined to break through the wall of doubt he had built for himself. "You were born and there is no changing that, and the fire would not have happened if you were not attacked. It was Kenra's doing, and it is the shadow that is to blame, not you."

"Thank you for saying that," Aaron replied, but it did not change how he felt. It is still my responsibility and I must make things right."

"You don't have to do it alone," Ehlena said. "The Ansari might help, the people of the forest are preparing to fight, and the dragons of the north could be rallied once again. You are not the only one who commands truefire, Aaron. Even I can conjure it, though it is not one of my stronger gifts. I can help you, and there are others who want to help you."

"No, Ehlena," he said. "There is a piece of the shadow deep within me, put there by this god, and I now know why. The truefire within me is powerful enough to burn the shadow, but the truth is, the god wants my power, and he has always wanted my power."

"The shadow craves all power, Aaron," Ehlena told him. "It always has. That is its nature. The dark god has fallen to the power of the shadow, and if you fall as well, you will only make it more powerful."

"It doesn't matter. Every day the shadow grows, and every day it becomes harder for me to resist using my power, so it doesn't matter what I do," Aaron said. "Time is growing short, and I must try to fight while I still can. I know you want me to learn more and I am grateful for the things you and the others have done to try to help me, but if I wait any longer, it will be too late."

Ehlena stared up at him and she knew the truth of his words, that he could feel the threat of the shadow and would know better than anyone how dangerous it had become.

"I just wish we could go back," Ehlena said, moving in close to him and leaning her head on his chest. "Don't you wish we could go back, to the time in the forest when it was just the two of us, out under the stars? I know we were both sad at the time, but I am always happy when I think of it."

Aaron smiled.

"I wish we could be there again too," he said.

Ehlena looked up at him, then she stood up on her toes and kissed him. His powerful arms tightened around her as he kissed her back, slow and gentle, and she felt his passion rise as they leaned into each other, savoring a stolen moment together, away from all the problems of the world. After what seemed like an eternity and barely long enough, Ehlena felt him slowly pull away, and she laid her head on his chest again, and held him tight.

"I must go, Ehlena," Aaron said quietly.

"I know," she said, trying to keep her voice steady.

"Even if I can stop the shadow, there is much that must be done to make the world right again," Aaron said.

"I will do what I can," Ehlena said. "As I have always done."

"I am glad you are in the world," Aaron told her. "The goddess was wise to choose you."

"It is difficult for me to know what to say to that," Ehlena told him, and she smiled as she wiped a tear. "Besides, I wouldn't want to be immodest."

Aaron laughed. "You never seemed to have a problem with that before."

"Is that what you think?" Ehlena pinched his side, below the ribs.

"Ow!" Aaron jumped, more out of surprise than actual pain. He looked down at her and tried to smile, but his thoughts had already begun to return to the task he faced. "I know you can hear things, and people. If you could do something for me, if things don't turn out."

"What is it?"

"You saw the memory of what happened at the palace," he said. "Though the shadow and the god might have caused it, it was still my power that caused the fire. The king and queen died because of me, and many others have suffered because of it, most of all, their daughter, Ariana, who is my sister. You know that I was the captain of her guard and we traveled together."

"Yes," Ehlena said.

"I didn't know who she was and she didn't know who I was, but we became friends. It was as though something within us knew one another, but we never got the chance to discover the truth of it. If anything happens to me, could you let her know that I am sorry I caused so much trouble, that if I could change it all, I would."