A Complicated Summer of Love (Complicated Love Series #3) (5 page)

So I take my beer and sit back on the couch and relax. I’m going to need a few of these tonight if I want to have any chance of dulling that voice inside my head. The voice that won’t let me forget what I need to forget if I have any chance of being happy again.

MONDAY

Ugh…my head is pounding from the amount of alcohol I consumed last night. I can’t believe I’ve been wasted for most of the nights so far. The first night was when Brandon, Maddison, and I decided to play spin the bottle. Just thinking about the amount of alcohol I put away that night makes me want to puke. I can’t really remember much about that night, but thankfully I woke up the next morning in my own bed. I have to be honest and say that it may have crossed my mind that I would have much preferred to have ended up in Brandon’s bed. I hate that I thought it, and I tried everything not to feel disappointed that morning.

Maddison was so annoying when she woke up. She was all smiles and so chipper that it made me irritated. I couldn’t believe that she was fine after drinking as much as we all did. There was me, sitting at the table sipping a black coffee while she sits opposite, eating toast, eggs, fresh fruit and she was drinking copious amounts of orange juice. I even saw her wolf down two blueberry muffins. I’m not sure how she keeps her figure and I hate her for it. I didn’t have to be sociable for long because after she had finished, she bounced back to the bungalow and was out the door before I could even ask where she was going. I spent Sunday lounging around and trying to cope with another almighty hangover I was sporting.

Sunday night I was completely bored and didn’t know what to do with myself, so I tried to sort out someone to talk to but I didn’t find anyone. Everyone seems to be coupling up and I’m getting rather annoyed with it.

Generally guys only want one thing from me, and it isn’t a date or even a romantic evening. No, it all comes down to sex. I always pick the wrong guys. I have a thing for bad boys and most men that I meet turn out to be sleazy. I don’t know why I’m so surprised that they turn out to be complete rubbish, but Brandon isn’t like that. He’s totally different to any guy I’ve ever met, and I like that…a lot. I hate that I feel like this, but I can’t help it and it’s driving me crazy. It’s now Monday and Maddison is off with Brandon again and I’m feeling envious so I have spent the day wallowing in my bed. This afternoon I’m sitting outside, sipping a white wine.

“Hey!” Maddison plonks herself down on a chair beside me. “Why are you sitting here all by yourself?”

“Just relaxing like you do. I thought you had left earlier? Where did you go?” I’m not sure if I want to know, but she disappeared so quickly this morning that I’m kind of curious.

“Oh, that. I went with Brandon to the beach.” She sighs and lays her head back. “He’s such a great guy, Lily. He’s smart, so kind, and pretty funny when he wants to be. He’s everything women dream of.” She sighs again and I feel like I’ve had a knife buried in my chest. “I can’t understand why Tracy gave him up. It doesn’t make sense. I really like him, but I don’t know how to make a move on him.” I wish she would stop talking because she’s pissing me off big time. She looks me in the eye. “What do you think I should do?” I can’t talk about this with her. I can’t help her with Brandon…no way. I stand up and stretch.

“I wish I knew, girl…I think I’ll go and see what the others are doing.” I quickly round the table and head toward the beach. I hear Maddison call out behind me.

“Thanks for helping.” I know she’s being sarcastic, so I don’t bother replying.

I stop at the steps leading down to the beach and I see everyone there. Tracy and Annabelle are sunbathing as usual while Karl, Joshua and Brandon are playing volleyball. They all have their tops off, and I can’t help but admire their physiques, especially Brandon. He’s wider than I thought and the rippling muscles are glistening in the sunshine. I can’t help but stare. I never knew he had such protruding abs under his shirts. I have to stop myself from drooling, and I have to make sure that I have no drool around my mouth. I feel so hot and flustered watching him running around in just his board shorts.

I lick my lips and feel a tingling between my thighs. I can’t believe he’s making me feel like this, and I’m not even near him. He suddenly looks up and our eyes lock. I love his gorgeous brown eyes that look like deep pools of chocolate. I could just fall into them with their incredible intensity that freezes me to the spot. I see a smirk appear on his face before Karl says something to him which he laughs at, and carries on with their game. I’m not really dressed for the beach. I have on a pair of blue jeans and a yellow halter neck top. I see that Annabelle and Tracy are in their bikinis, but that’s no different as they have been sunbathing for the past couple of days. It seems they don’t want to go back without an all over tan…apparently.

“Lily!” I look over to where my name’s being called and see Tracy waving frantically. She waves me over, so I move across to them and hope I don’t embarrass myself by slobbering all over Brandon.

She’s looking so beautiful today, and seeing her standing there on the steps watching me has me feeling kind of good. Looking at her makes my heart skip beats every time she looks at me and it’s no exception when our gazes lock. She is absolutely gorgeous, and I can’t get her out of my mind. She’s everything I think about all the time, and I don’t know what to do. I’ve spent time with Maddison for the last two days now because I like spending time with her. She’s amusing when she wants to be, and she has finally opened up and isn’t that shy girl that never spoke to me. She’s a great friend, and I really do enjoy her company, but she isn’t the woman I think about constantly. I’m not attracted to Maddison like I am Lily, and maybe that’s why I can be around Maddison more.

Lily always seems cold toward me, ever since I took her home that night all those months ago. I never know how to act around Lily and I wish she would stop being so cold or drunk when I talk to her. She’s been getting drunk since we got here and, to be honest, I don’t like it when she drinks so much. I know we all like to have a drink, but she always takes it too far and I’m worried when she drinks herself into oblivion. She never seems to know when to stop, and I hate seeing her like it, but what can I do? She’s nothing to do with me and even though we flirt, I have no say in anything she does. I’m sure it wouldn’t be received well, me saying something.

“Brandon?” Karl snaps his fingers in front of my face and I blink several times before looking at him. I notice a smirk on his face. “You with us?”

Joshua runs up and says, “Why have we stopped?” Joshua looks between the two of us and sees Karl smirking. “Oh…I see!” They both start laughing.

“What?” I’m confused by their reaction.

“You always have your head in the clouds when a certain redhead is nearby.” I’m getting irritated because of the smirk that’s plastered all over his face.

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” I hate both of them looking at me as though they know what I’m thinking. Of course, they’re right, I was thinking about Lily, but I hate that I’m so transparent.

“Oh, come on, mate. We aren’t stupid, and you have it written all over your face. You like her, don’t you?” Joshua winks at me and chuckles. “I don’t understand why you’ve been hanging out with Maddison though.” He frowns.

“I like Maddison, okay? She’s great to be around and we’re just having fun, that’s all.”

“You do realize that she likes you?”

My heart starts pounding erratically.
She likes me?
Lily has never looked interested in anything else apart from flirting with me, so for Karl to say that she likes me has me feeling rather good right now.

“Do you think so?” I look between Karl and Joshua.

“We can see it. She doesn’t hide it very well, and I think you need to tell her that you’re not interested before you are thrust into an awkward situation,” Joshua says. I furrow my brows because I’m not sure why he’s just said that.

I like Lily too, so why would I tell her I’m not interested?

“I can’t tell her that. I wouldn’t mean it, okay? I like her a lot. I know she’s cold toward me sometimes and she’s really irritating, but there’s just something about her that I like.” I sigh with the relief that I’ve finally admitted it to myself, and now to Joshua and Karl. They both look at each other before keeling over with laughter. I’m not quite sure what they are laughing about, I’m pretty sure I didn’t say anything funny, but they’re starting to piss me off.

“What the hell is wrong with you two?”

Karl straightens up and he has that annoying smirk on his face again.

“We’re laughing because we finally got you to admit you like Lily.” I’m still confused.

“Well, of course, I do. And now that I know she likes me too, I can finally do something about it.” I go to walk toward the girls, but Joshua stops me by placing a hand on my arm.

“Um…actually, I think we have our wires crossed. We were talking about Maddison liking you.”

I don’t know what to say. I feel stupid, admitting to these two that I like Lily. My mind is always so focused on Lily that I didn’t even realize that they were still talking about Maddison.

“I…I…” I’m so embarrassed.

Karl chuckles and places a hand on my shoulder. “It’s all right, mate. Your secret is safe with us, but maybe you should put Maddison out of her misery. She follows you around like a lovesick puppy half the time. I’m surprised she isn’t here now.” I look toward where the girls are and see that Tracy and Annabelle are sitting up talking to Lily. As I’m watching, she stands and takes her T-shirt and jeans off. My God, my heart goes into overdrive when I see her standing there in a lacy black bra and matching thong. She bends over and spreads a towel out before sitting down on it. I quickly glance at Tracy and Annabelle to see them looking at me and smiling. I hear a wolf whistle and I see Karl standing beside me.

“Oh, mate…she is H.O.T.” I glance at Karl and I know he’s trying to piss me off, and it’s working.

“Shut. Up!” He chuckles and slaps me on the back.

“You’re so screwed, mate.” He shakes his head. “Let’s get back to the game, yeah?”

I look at the girls again and see Lily spread out on her back. She’s so gorgeous, and I have to admit, Karl is right.

I am so screwed.

“How’s it going with Karl?” Annabelle asks. I smile to myself as Annabelle, Lily and I lay side by side on the beach while the guys are playing volleyball.

“Things are going…well.” I can’t stop the smile that spreads across my face. “I’m not actually sure now why I thought being with him would be wrong.” Annabelle bolts upright and stares at me.

“Oh my God! Are you saying that you want to be with him?” As she said it, her voice gets louder and louder.

“Ssh.” I look over at the guys and luckily enough, they haven’t heard and are still playing their game. “I don’t want the guys to overhear.” Annabelle looks down before pouting. She always does that when she wants me to forgive her, so I laugh at her stupid expression.

“Sorry, but I’m excited for you. I’ve been rooting for you guys to finally see sense. You both want it, and I’ve never understood why you couldn’t be together. It’s not like you are looking elsewhere, and the way he looks at you, my God, I could melt with the amount of sexual tension that is sizzling between you two.” Lily sits up and smirks.

“You need to take him back to the bungalow and fuck him.”

I gasp. “Lily! Ssh, not you too. Why do you two have to be so loud? They are only over there, you know!” I wave my hands toward them to make my point. Lily holds up her hands.

“Okay, I’m just saying…go and spend a night between the sheets with ‘
you know who’
and I’m sure you two will be grinning insanely in the morning.” She snatches up my glasses that were laying on my towel and puts them on before laying back down. I turn back to Annabelle.

“I can’t just go over to him and drag him back to the bungalow. That’s insane.”

Annabelle laughs and shakes her head. “I don’t think he’d complain, but maybe it might be best to find the right time for you two without everyone knowing your business.” I get what she means and plus, it would be really embarrassing dragging him off in front of everyone. I look over at the guys and they seem to be having a good time.

“How are you and Joshua now?” Annabelle sighs and looks at me, but at least she’s smiling.

“Everything’s fine now. I cooked him dinner on Sunday night after getting some things off my chest, and he was back to the Joshua I fell in love with. Sometimes there are moments when he’s quiet and I think that something is going on with him, but he says he’s fine, so I have to trust him and I do…more than anything.” She takes a breath, and I see a sly smile on her face. “Plus, he definitely made up for it that night, if you know what I mean?” How could I not with the smile that’s gracing her lips.

“I get what you mean.” I chuckle and I’m happy for her. I knew it was killing her, not knowing what she’d done wrong. I can still see some pain in her eyes when she talks about these quiet moments that Joshua still has. I haven’t noticed anything different about him, but I don’t really know him that well. “I’m glad you’re happy, Annabelle.” She gives me a hug and I turn around to see Maddison bouncing toward us. She always seems to be so chipper and happy. Lily leans up on her elbows and watches Madison approaching.

“What’s her deal? Who invited her?” She wrinkles her nose and I know that she hates that Maddison has been spending so much time with Brandon.

“That was my idea,” Annabelle pipes up. “She seems really lonely. She doesn’t have any friends that I know off, so I thought it would be nice to invite her. She’s always nice to me, and we get on well. Plus, she helps Joshua out a lot. I kind of feel sorry for her.”

“Well, I don’t like her. There’s just something about her that really irritates me.” I glance at Lily and she’s glaring at Maddison.

I roll my eyes. “I think you don’t like her because she likes Brandon.” I smirk when her eyes snap to me.

“I-I…That’s not true!” She reverts her eyes away. “I couldn’t care less if she’s interested in Brandon,” she mumbles, but me and Annabelle both hear her and burst out laughing. Lily looks totally bothered as she sits there with a scowl on her face, but before she can say anything else, Maddison bounds up to us.

“Hey, guys! What are you all up to?” She looks between Annabelle and me. I find it strange that she doesn’t acknowledge Lily, but Lily doesn’t seem to care as she’s looking anywhere but at Maddison.

“Nothing much really. We’re just relaxing and watching the guys playing volleyball,” Annabelle speaks before it gets awkward.

“Yeah, that looks like fun. I’m going to go and join…maybe I’ll see if I can play on Brandon’s team.” She winks and bounces away toward the guys. I see her race straight up to Brandon and he smiles at her and they are talking until Brandon grabs the ball and positions Maddison in front of him. He pulls her closer while he shows her how to serve the ball. It takes a few attempts for Maddison to get it, and I’m sure part of the time she’s playing dumb so she gets the attention from Brandon. I hear a growl beside me and I turn my head to see Lily looking furious. Her face is bright red, and she keeps clenching and unclenching her fists. She looks like she wants to race over there and knock her out. I can’t help but chuckle and Lily notices.

“What?” she growls. Annabelle is hiding her broad smile behind her hands and trying to control her giggling.

“Why can’t you just admit that you like him? You clearly do, going by the expression that’s currently on your face.” I chuckle again and I think we are seriously pissing her off.

“You are way off the mark. I’m not interested in him, okay?” We don’t have time to say anything else. She gets up and storms back to the bungalows. I look at Annabelle and we can’t control our laughing and it gets to the point that I have tears rolling down my cheeks. After we finally stop, I glance at Annabelle to see that she’s also got tears rolling down her cheeks.

“I can’t believe she won’t admit it. She likes him, we know it, so why’s she being so stubborn?”

Annabelle composes herself and replies, “I’m not sure, but she definitely has some competition. Although, I’m not sure where Brandon stands on this. You know him better than me. Do you think he likes Maddison?”

“You would think I’d know him being with him for over a year, but to be honest, I don’t think we really knew each other as much as we thought we did. Plus, I don’t really know Maddison, but they sure seem to like each other.” We glance back over and Maddison is whispering something in his ear, and she keeps touching him anywhere she can. She is definitely flirting.

“I know someone else who’s being really stubborn right now, and won’t go after what she wants.” I snap my head toward Annabelle when I hear her words and see she’s smirking.

“What do you mean by that?”

“Well, you love Karl, but because you have some stupid thought going through your mind, you won’t give in and commit to him. You want to, I can see it in your eyes. Why won’t you just tell Karl?”

“Tell me what?” I jerk my head around and stare wide-eyed at Karl standing in front of me. I can’t think of anything to say, and now he’s standing in front of me, I don’t know if I can finally tell him what I really want. I want him so much, but I don’t know how to tell him. Annabelle can see that I’m struggling so she tries to help me out.

“Oh…she was…um…” Annabelle looks down and plays with her fingers. Well, that went well. She actually helped me out a lot with
that
answer. I can’t help but glare at her, but she won’t look up. Suddenly she bolts up.

“I think I’ll go and see what Joshua is doing. Catch you later.” She hurries off and all I want to do is throttle her for leaving me here with no explanation. Karl smiles and grabs my hand to pull me up from the sun lounger.

“What do you want to tell me, beautiful?” He places his arms around my waist and I can’t help but fall into his embrace. It always feels so damn right being in his arms, and sometimes I don’t understand why I can’t just admit to wanting him and commit to a relationship. The more time we spend together, I know it’s what I want. We are different to my parents, and if I’m honest, deep down I know that we won’t turn out like them. We have so much chemistry between us and I love spending time with him. We really get each other, and I can’t imagine spending my life without him.

I’m so frustrated that I can’t tell him how I feel.

I feel so stupid that this amazing guy standing in front of me has changed his ways and wants to commit to me and only me. This guy before me was a player once upon a time that used to bed every woman possible, and I’m annoyed with myself for not taking the bull by the horns and telling him that he’s mine and I’m his…forever.

“Beautiful?” I jerk back from my thoughts to find Karl looking slightly concerned. “Are you okay?”

“Um…yeah, I’m fine.” I take a deep breath and decide that now is the time to tell him.

“I…um…” I have a huge lump in my throat and I’m finding it hard to swallow.

Why is this so hard?

“I…want…um…” I’m starting to piss myself off. I don’t understand what’s wrong with me. I take another deep breath and go to speak again, but before I get a chance, Karl crushes his lips to mine in a bruising, punishing kiss. It’s a really possessive kiss, so much so that my heart starts skipping beats and is beating erratically. He moves a hand and places it behind my head and pulls me closer. I run my hands up his bare chest and I can feel every muscle I touch, flexing and twitching. I love his smooth skin beneath my fingers. Since being here, he has tanned a lot and it really suits him. I trail my fingers up and wrap them around his neck while he glides his other hand down onto my ass. I love when he squeezes my ass cheeks, and he doesn’t disappoint me.

I moan when he slips his tongue into my mouth. It feels fantastic and he doesn’t leave any part of my mouth untouched. My head feels fuzzy and I feel so lightheaded when he massages my tongue with his. I’m so swept up in the kiss and the feelings that he’s evoking in me that it takes me a second to realize that Karl has broken the kiss. He’s smiling that charming smile I love so much and still has me wrapped up in his arms. Then I hear them. I glance to my right and spot Annabelle, Joshua, and Brandon whistling and making cat calls while watching us. I blush ten shades of red and bury my head in Karl’s chest. I hear Karl chuckling.

“Beautiful, I think we’re creating quite a show out here.” He chuckles again. “Why don’t we go back to my bungalow?” I look up and see the desire and longing in his eyes. It’s been ages since we were together and I’m slightly nervous, thinking about being with him again. I notice that everyone seems to be walking back to the bungalows because it’s getting late.

“Uh…what about Brandon?” He seems to think for a second before looking over toward our friends who are still standing there with giant smiles on their faces. I see Brandon nod his head and that seems to be the answer that Karl is waiting for. I gasp when I realize that they know where we’re going and what we’re going to be doing, and I’m really embarrassed right about now.

“I can’t believe you just did that!” He looks at me and laughs.

“What? I don’t know what you are talking about?” I slap him in the chest and he pretends that I have hurt him.

“Oh, stop being a baby, and you know what I’m talking about. You have basically just asked Brandon if we can go back to your bungalow and…and—”

“Fuck?” I blush when he says that out loud and he chuckles. “I was just making sure that he won’t be walking in on us, anytime tonight.”

I step out of his arms and glare, but it doesn’t affect Karl. Before I know it, he lifts me up in his arms and starts carrying me toward his bungalow. I can hear Annabelle, Joshua, and Brandon carrying on behind us, whistling and making crude noises. I can’t help but laugh at their comments as I’m here, in the arms of the man I love and cherish with all my heart. I start feeling those nervous butterflies in my stomach and I can’t decide if I’m more nervous or more excited for what’s about to happen tonight.