A Child's Heart (Trent & Cassie's Story) A River City Novel (15 page)

“I’m not a saint. I’m a man who’s made plenty of
mistakes. Why should God reward me?”

“Why not? You’ve kept your faith in Him. That’s more
than most would do in your shoes.” Her fingers brushed his
cheeks.

“It’s not that simple.”

***

Trent hung up the phone. He lost count as to how many
times he’d dialed the museum only to get a busy signal. He checked
the time and headed for the shop. Once he had assured himself that
all was well, he came back through the showroom floor with the
intention of leaving.

“Trent, would you answer a few questions for some
clients?”

He looked at his watch one more time. “Better be
quick.”

He answered their questions, then went straight for
his car. His mom would leave for work in less than twenty minutes,
and he had to be there for Shawn. As soon as he pulled into his
driveway, his mom smiled at him, got into her car, and backed
out.

He breathed a sigh of relief. Not having Shawn in
playschool was going to make these next few days very difficult. He
opened the front door. “Hey, Shawn, where are you?”

“In here." The voice came from the bedroom. "Can we
play checkers?”

“Sure. Bring it into the kitchen,” Trent called back
as he ran water to wash his hands.

“I’ve been trying to play by myself, but that’s
hard.”

Trent sniffed the coffee and made a fresh pot. “What
have you and Grandmom been doing all day?”

“Grandmom did laundry, and I was bored.”

“I understand. I know you miss your friends, but it’s
only for a few days.”

“Pick a hand.”

“This one.” Trent pointed to the boy's right
hand.

Shawn opened it to reveal a red checker. “I wanted to
go first.”

“Well, I don’t mind being black. Besides, I’m rusty
at this game.”

Shawn set the game up, giving his father the black
checkers, and then sat on the chair with one foot on the floor, the
other tucked under him. “Can I have a dog?”

“A dog?”

“Yeah, I want a collie.”

Trent watched his son slide a checker forward. “We
don’t have enough yard for a collie. They’re big dogs. They need
lots of room to run.”

“I knew you were going to say that.” Shawn rolled his
lower lip out.

“Then why did you ask?”

Shawn shrugged and moved another checker.

“Dogs are expensive, and the bigger they are, the
more expensive they are.” He pushed a checker forward with very
little thought.

“I want something that I can run and play with. I
don’t want some tiny thing.”

“Let’s get you through the surgery first.”

Shawn jumped his father’s checker.

“Bad move.” Trent jumped his son’s black one.

“Why did you do that?” Shawn crossed his arms and
once again pouted.

“Because you stuck it there. It’s okay, we’re both
down one checker.”

“Are you going to marry Cassie?”

“Do you think because we kiss that we’re going to get
married?”

“Well, you wouldn’t kiss her if you didn’t love her,
right?”

Trent stifled his desire to laugh at his son. “Right.
We might. We’ve talked about it, but we haven’t made any
decisions.”

“Grandmom says Cassie wouldn’t be my mother. She’d be
my step-mother.”

Oh great! I don't need Mom
interfering.
“True. What else did Grandmom
say about Cassie?”

Shawn shrugged.

“Come on, spit it out.”

“She said God was going to punish you because you
were walking down the garden path. But I told Grandmom that you
weren’t in any garden, just on the beach.”

Trent couldn’t control the chuckle that escaped his
throat. “I don’t think Grandmom likes my spending so much time with
Cas.” He pushed another checker forward. “Uh oh, I goofed.”

“Yep!” Shawn jumped several checkers.

“I don’t think you can jump backwards like that.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t know, but I don’t think it’s allowed, at
least not with a single checker. Got to be a double.”

Shawn scrunched up his face. “Do I have to put it
back?”

“No, just don’t do it again.” Looking at the board,
he had very few choices, and no matter which piece he moved, it
gave Shawn another opportunity to jump. He shoved one forward.

Shawn jumped the checker and doubled his. “Now can I
jump any which way?”

“Yes.” And watched as his son captured several more
checkers. His cell phone rang, and he picked up the call. “Hello.”
“Yes, it is." "The thirtieth and I’m to be there at seven o’clock.
Thanks.”

“Is that about me?” Shawn asked.

Trent grabbed a pen and wrote on the wall calendar.
“No. I go to the doctor’s office tomorrow for my shoulder, and my
surgery is set for the thirtieth.”

“What are they going to do to it?”

Trent returned to his seat. “I don’t know. I think
that’s why I have to see the doctor tomorrow.”

“My appointment is tomorrow.”

“I know. You may come with me and then I’ll take you
to your appointment in the afternoon.”

“I’m scared.”

Trent looked at his son. “Of what?”

“Of having surgery.”

“You’ll be asleep. You won’t feel a thing." He pushed
his checker forward. "Double my checker.”

Shawn stacked a checker on his father's. “Billy said
I could die.”

“Billy’s a little kid. He’s not a doctor. Your doctor
wouldn’t do this surgery if he didn’t think it was going to fix
your heart.”

“I’m still scared.”

“Don’t be. Cas is going to be there while you have
your surgery.”

“Really?” The little boy's eyes grew big.

“Yes, really. She loves you.”

Shawn got very serious. “I know. That’s why you have
to marry her.”

A big grin tugged at Trent's cheeks. “You want her
that much, huh?”

***

Cassie turned the lights out in her office. It had
been a long, grueling day, and she was glad it was over. She
punched Trent’s number on her cell phone and waited for him to pick
up. “Hi. What are you doing?”

“Drinking coffee and losing a third game of checkers
to my son. Want dinner? There’s plenty here.”

“You don’t have to ask me twice for that. Do I have
time to change first?”

“Nope, come as you are.”

It didn't take her long to drive to the house and
park her car. As she raised her hand to knock, the door opened and
Shawn was beaming at her.

“Hi, sweetie.”

“Hi. Daddy’s in the kitchen. You look pretty.”

“Thank you.” She followed Shawn and when she reached
the kitchen, she washed her hands. “I should have stopped by my
place on the way here. I don’t want to bring any germs with
me.”

Trent looked at her standing there in a pair of
heels, dress pants, and a jacket. “Want to wear one of my tee
shirts? And I think I’ve got a pair of shorts with a draw
string.”

“I think the shirt will fall to my knees. That should
be sufficient.”

“Shawn, show Cas where to find a tee shirt.”

She followed the child to Shawn’s room. The double
bed took up most of the floor space and there was a chest of
drawers, a small bureau, and a tiny nightstand crammed into the
space. Everything was quite tidy, including the drawer that Shawn
opened. She reached in and plucked the top shirt. It unfolded to
reveal Joe’s Fish House screen-printed on the pocket and on the
back was a larger image.

“That’s Daddy’s newest. Our neighbor gave it to him.
She works there.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t wear it if he just got it. Can you
find me another one while I fold this one back up?”

Shawn reached to the bottom of the drawer and handed
her a colorful tie-dyed shirt. “Here. He never wears this one. He
says it looks like a girl’s shirt.”

She put the first shirt back and took the tie-dye
from Shawn. “I think this will be perfect for me.”

Shawn smiled brightly and left her
alone in Trent’s room. She clicked the door closed and quickly
changed. Just as she had predicted, the shirt fell almost to her
knees. She tried to back up enough to see in the mirror over the
bureau, but she tripped on the edge of the bed and caught her
balance. Noticing the closet door slightly ajar, she snooped. The
closet was almost empty compared to hers, but in the very back was
his high school jacket. She pulled it out, looked at it, and
returned it. On the shelf over the rod was the edge of a frame. She
tipped it and then took a long gaze at the diploma.
Trent graduated top in his class. He gave up
everything for Colleen and the baby she was carrying.

She put it back and joined them in the kitchen.

“May I help with anything?” she asked.

“I’m ready to serve it.” Trent stood at the stove and
ladled food onto Shawn’s plate first. “Want to fill your own?”

She watched Shawn waiting patiently, and when Trent
sat, Shawn bowed his head and said, “Bless us O Lord, and these Thy
gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty, through
Christ our Lord. Amen.”

They all made the sign of the cross.

She reached over and ran her fingers through Shawn’s
hair. “That was perfect, Shawn. I’ve very proud of you. Who taught
you to say that?”

“Grandmom. We always say grace when we are home.”

“I think we’re supposed to say it even when we aren’t
home.” She took a few bites. “This is so good. I can’t remember the
last time I ate boiled ham and cabbage.”

“It’s leftovers. Want some bread?”

“I’m fine with this.”

“Tomorrow, it we’ll probably have split pea soup,
with whatever was left on the bone. Nothing goes to waste.”

“It was that way in our house, but with my brothers,
there was never much left over.”

Trent shook his head. “Seems my entire life we’ve
eaten leftovers.”

She reached over and touched Trent’s arm. “Your mom
is a good cook. You’ve been very lucky.”

“You’re not going to find too many steaks in this
house.”

“Steak is good, but right now, this tastes better
than any steak.”

“Glad you like it.”

There was an edge in Trent’s voice that she didn’t
like. She watched him trying to decide if he hated what he was
eating, or if he was feeling guilty about serving her such a simple
fare.

~~16~~

When Shawn went to bed, Trent and Cassie sat on the
tiny patio in the backyard.

“Am I keeping you from doing something?” she
asked.

He shook his head.

“What's wrong tonight? You’ve been distant and
reticent”

“I’ve got my problems, and you’ve got yours.”

She gazed over the yard and noticed all the roses
that were blooming, or about to bloom. Not a blade of grass
appeared to be out of place. “Do you feel as if my problems are
affecting you?”

“No. I’ve got enough of my own.”

“Meaning?” She watched a small bird at a feeder.

“My surgery is scheduled for the thirtieth.”

“That’s next Tuesday. How’s the pain?”

“It hurts like hell.”

She shook her head. “Are you sleeping?”

He nodded. “I take the one pill before I go to
bed.”

“I should go home.”

“Don’t leave yet.”

“But you’re in pain. If I go, you can--”

“No. We need to talk.”

“Okay.”

“Cas, you yank every emotional string inside of me,
and right now, that’s a bad thing.”

Her heart seemed to instantly fall into her stomach.
“Are you trying to tell me that you want me out of your life?”

“No. Everything is jumbled.”

“Like what?” She sucked in her lower lip and waited
for his response.

“My feelings for you.”

“What are your feelings, and why is it bad?”

“Let’s lay a few things on the table.”

She sat quietly, trying to relax her clenched
insides.

“I don’t want you in my life feeling sorry for me.
I’ve been living with my problems for a long time. You’re Pollyanna
attitude about Shawn’s surgery isn’t very realistic. You and your
hotshot friends think this is going to be the great cure.”

Anger began to boil from where her heart had fallen.
Taking a deep breath, she cut him off. “I’m certainly aware of the
risks involved. And your attitude towards my friends is unfounded.
But that’s your son asleep in the other room, and you need to stop
thinking about losing him, and start looking at his future.”

“I can’t look past June first, and you need to
understand that.”

“No. For Shawn’s sake, you’d better start looking
beyond that date. You think he doesn’t pick up on your thoughts?
You’re wrong. Haven’t you noticed that he doesn’t say anything
about playing soccer or seeing his friends again? He thinks he’s
going to die.”

“Maybe he is.”

“That’s in God’s hands, and he’s
given you the best doctors and equipment. Give Shawn some hope, or
he
will
die.”

“Don’t tell me what to do with my son.”

“Excuse me? I’m not telling you what to do. I’m
pointing out that you are condemning him with your attitude. That
child is so uptight about surgery, that he’s fearful of you having
yours.”

Trent glanced at her for a split second. “That’s
nuts!”

“Is not. Ask him tomorrow morning. Ask him if he
thinks you will die having your surgery.”

He turned and glared at her.

“I watched the color drain from his face at dinner
when you mentioned it.”

“I’ve never said a word to him about dying.”

“You don’t have to say it. You think he hasn’t
overheard conversations? Kids have built in radar. They pick up on
things.”

He propped his elbow on his knee, lowered his head
into the palm of his hand, and sat in silence.

Her heart went out to him. “There is no magic wand,
and we don’t have a crystal ball. Anything can happen.”

Trent didn’t move.