44 Book Five (16 page)

And she did.

She fought for breath, but she was weak. She was like a newborn calf in my hands. My terrible iron hands. She was weak and feeble and worthless.

In a few moments, the light went out of those eyes, and I let her limp body drop to the floor.

She understood now. I had made her see the error of her ways.

My hands felt alive. I felt alive, power pumping through my veins like a train from hell ripping through the night.

I looked at her dead body, and I looked back at my hands.

And sure as she was lying there, I knew there would be more.

I never wanted to feel anything else.

***

Kate was crying.

“What happened?”

“Rest now, Abby. I’m right here. I’ll be here with you all night. Hang in there.”

I saw a man in the corner and I screamed.

“Kate,” I yelled. “It’s him! It’s the ghost of Clyde Tidwell. The one who killed Paloma!”

I screamed again with everything I had, thrashing my arms and legs on the bed. My face hurt, thick drool leaking out of my mouth.

“Get him out of here,” I yelled.

But she wouldn’t listen. She let him move closer to her.

“No, Kate! No! Stay away from him.”

Then the ghost turned into someone else.

“Shhh, Abby,” Dr. Krowe said, staring down at me, a stethoscope in his ears and on my chest. “You’ll be okay.”

I was so hot. Burning, burning, burning.

I pushed him away, pushed him away from me.

“I’m just here to help,” he said.

“Here to help?” I heard myself screaming. “Here to help? Help yourself. Help
yourself
.”

I fell back into the strange darkness, repeating those words over and over again and laughing so hard it hurt my face.

CHAPTER 44

It was the deepest blue sky I had ever seen.

I threw myself down on the ground, staring up at it, swimming and dancing in the rich color.

“I can see it!” I screamed. “I can see it, Jesse! I can see colors again!”

“Of course you can, Craigers,” Jesse said, taking my hand. “They were here the whole time.”

I turned and looked at him, hearing the tears fall off my face, like rain, hitting the ground in a loud splash.

“Oh, Jesse,” I said. “Your eyes are the most incredible green. I’ve missed them so much. They look like emeralds. And the grass. The leaves. They’re so beautiful. This is so amazing.”

I sat up and looked around. We were in a field, the sun bright, the blue sky laid out in front of us like those long, lost summers of our childhood. I looked at my shirt. Purple. My shoes were white with yellow streaks on the sides.

“It’s a miracle. I can see color again. Everything is so deep and rich. Where are we?”

He sighed.

“Somewhere you don’t belong,” he said.

I touched his cheek.

“It’s okay,” I said. “It’s all good.”

“No,” he said. “It’s not. It’s not good. Look.”

He pointed. Way in the distance, someone was walking.

“But I’m going to try. I’m going to try and help you.”

“I love you,” I said, rolling over and hugging him. “I love you so much, Jesse.”

Then I looked back up at the black shadow figure now walking quickly toward us, still just a silhouette against the sunlight. And then I saw those eyes. Those terrible, stark, light blue eyes.

Sharp as obsidian.

He was coming right for us, crossing the grass.

Jesse pulled me up. I squinted in the sunlight, staring.

He was getting closer and closer.

“He’s growing off of your energy,” Jesse said. “I have to stop him.”

“Don’t go,” I yelled. “Jesse. Don’t leave me again. I love you!”

“Run, Craigers!” he said, letting go of my hand. “Stay away from him. Now. Run!”

Clouds came in and the rain started, my feet stuck, sinking in the mud that was suddenly everywhere. I stared at Jesse, who was going full speed, flying into it, while his voice was still in my ears, screaming at me to run.

I ran toward the light. With Jesse’s words still echoing in my head, I ran through the colors and left them behind.

His voice fell away as his world disappeared behind me.

CHAPTER 45

The sunlight was in my face. Kate was sitting on the bed, looking at me.

“How are you feeling?” she said.

I reached up and touched my head. My stomach felt okay finally. I didn’t feel hot anymore.

“Better,” I said.

She reached over and felt my head and nodded.

“You’re a lot cooler.”

I looked around. Ty wasn’t in the room.

“Where’s Ty?” I asked. “I thought he was coming back.”

Her eyes fell to the floor.

“He was here for a long time. You’ve been pretty out of it for two days.”

“Two days? That can’t be.”

“I told him to go home and get some rest.”

“Tell him I want to see him,” I said. “If he calls. Tell him to come back.”

She didn’t answer right away.

“Just rest.Rest, Abby. You’re improving. That’s all that matters at this point. You’re okay now. You’re safe.”

***

The water felt warm on my skin and I stood in the shower for a long time and let it wash the dried sweat and grime away. When I came out, I felt new again. Stronger.

The dream and Jesse were still vivid in my mind. The colors, Jesse, the black figure walking toward me. Was it just a dream? I didn’t know what any of it meant, but it felt like it had happened, that he ran off to fight the darkness that was coming for me.

I had to find him. And make sure he was okay.

I went out to the kitchen and sat down at the table. Kate put down toast, some grapes, and a glass of orange juice in front of me.

“Let’s see how that sits before you eat a real meal.”

I was wearing a purple shirt in the vision. And I saw it. I saw the color.

Kate sat across from me with large eyes. I kept eating until everything was gone.

“It’s good to see you eat,” she said, smiling weakly. “It’s been days.”

“That’s how it feels,” I said, wiping my mouth. “Now tell me what you’re not telling me.”

CHAPTER 46

We moved to the living room and I pulled a fleece blanket around me and put my feet up on the coffee table. Kate sat down, close to me, tucking the blanket under my legs.

“The important thing is that you’re all right now. We were so worried about you. You were really sick. Coughing and throwing up a river. You had a high fever. You said some really crazy things. That’s why I called Dr. Krowe. He was here, do you remember?”

“Yeah,” I said. “I think so.”

“Even he was shocked at some of the things coming out of your mouth. He said it was the fever making you say them.”

“I think it was the same thing as Paloma,” I said. “The ghost was trying to get in me, too.”

“Not trying, Abby. He
was
in you. You weren’t yourself. You weren’t right in the head.”

The hairs on the back of my neck stood up.

“And it wasn’t just what you were saying. You were sleepwalking too. You went in the back yard and dug up all the flowers.”

“What?”

She didn’t look at me, just nodded.

“I brought you back inside,” she said, her voice cracking.

I didn’t remember any of it.

“It’s true,” she said, clearing her throat. “But it all still gives me chills. When I asked you what you were doing, you looked at me with these crazy eyes and told me that you were digging my grave.”

I started shaking.

“Oh, my God, Kate,” I said. “I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”

“It wasn’t you, Abby,” she said, hugging me. “I know it wasn’t you.”

“I don’t remember any of it. None of it.”

“I know,” she said. “It’s lucky that you don’t.”

We were quiet for a minute.

“What happened to Ty?” I said, almost afraid to ask. I could feel something wasn’t right.

“He was here,” she said. “For most of it. But last night, you were delirious, screaming and yelling.”

“I scared him off?” I said.

“I don’t know,” she said. “But you kept calling out for Jesse.”

I remembered that.

“What else? Tell me.”

“You said that you loved him,” she said. “You said you loved Jesse.”

“Damn it. God damn it.”

I felt like crying and held my head in my hands. I told Kate about the dream with Jesse and how something was after us, a dark energy with these bright blue eyes.

“I saw the color, Kate,” I said. “I saw them.”

“Your eyes were blue some of the time,” she said. “Light blue. It was freaking me out.”

“Jesse fought it. He told me to run while he fought the demon. I don’t know if he made it. I have a bad, bad feeling about it.”

But then I thought back to Ty.

“Has he called?”

“Of course,” she said. “About a thousand times. You’ll see him soon. Ty can handle it. Give him some time.”

I nodded, sitting quiet for a moment.

“God damn it,” I repeated.

CHAPTER 47

“What about Paloma?” I asked, dreading what Kate would say. “Have you heard anything?”

“It’s good news, Abby,” she said. “She’s okay.”

Kate told me that Paloma had been found wandering around on a forest road somewhere outside of Prineville. She had driven her car deep into the wilderness and crashed into a boulder. She had suffered a concussion and a broken collarbone.

“It seems like she blacked out for a while. When she came to, she waited for help to come,” Kate said. “But when she realized no one knew where she was and that she seemed to be out in the middle of nowhere, she started following the car tracks back.

“Some hunters found her and drove her to the hospital. They checked her out and the doctors said she’s fine. She went home yesterday. One of the first things she did was call you.”

“That’s great news,” I said. “I’m so relieved.”

“There was something, though, that the doctors couldn’t explain,” Kate said. “Paloma had a lot of cuts and bruises from the accident. But there were some bruises around her neck that weren’t consistent with a car accident. Off the record, one of them told me that it looked like someone had tried to choke her.”

CHAPTER 48

The sun was low in the cloudy October sky, the air smelled of wet leaves and burning wood stoves. I slid on my FC Barcelona track jacket and stepped outside, walking past Mo sitting on the curb, sucking down smoke.

I stared at the new tattoo on her leg. It was of a gargoyle with a tongue sticking out. Underneath it the word “Paris” was written in large cursive letters.

“You closing tonight?” I asked her.

She stomped out the butt on the cement and stood up.

“Yeah,” she said.

“Have a good one,” I said. “See you tomorrow.”

“Later,” she said.

Kate had insisted I take some time off, convinced that I had been working too many hours all summer and that it had contributed to what had happened. It was my first day back in a week. Kate never referred to it as a possession, but as an illness. I didn’t know what it had been, I just knew that it was great to be alive.

Apologizing to Mo was the first thing I did when I came back. I didn’t know what I said, so when I found her in the storage room, I was honest.

“Mo, look, I’m sorry. Sorry for what I said to you even though I don’t remember any of it.”

“You called me a slut, you bitch,” she said.

Just hearing the words rattled me.

“I was sick,” I said. “I called my sister worse from what I hear.”

She waved me off like she had already let it go.

Like I did every day, I drove to the park and looked for Jesse.

I couldn’t find him to thank him for what he did, for battling that
thing
on the field.

He wasn’t around.

I couldn’t feel him anywhere.

I called out to him. I begged him to come back.

But I knew.

The darkness that had tried to take me had succeeded in taking him.

Jesse was gone.

And this time it was forever.

CHAPTER 49

In the end I loved them both and lost them both.

I hadn’t seen Ty in weeks and I ached to be in his arms again.

We had talked a few times on the phone about what had happened, but it didn’t help any. I was up front about everything. The evil ghost, seeing Jesse in a dream, seeing Paloma in my vision. It was who I was now, and I was hoping Ty would accept it.

I knew it was a lot to take on and as the days went by and I didn’t hear from him, I wondered if it was all too much.

“Be patient with me, Abby,” he had said sadly one day. “I just need a little time to sort all this out.”

I tried.

A week slipped away. And then two.

He finally called on a Wednesday afternoon. I heard his voice and cried. I needed to see him, hold him. Kiss him.

We met along the river, soggy leaves under our feet.

“I didn’t know if you were really going to come,” I said as he walked up to me. His energy was darker than usual even though he smiled.

He kissed me and then took my hand, giving me hope.

“Of course I’d come,” he said.

He wiped a tear off my cheek and we walked quietly for a few minutes, crossing the footbridge and sitting on an empty bench.

“I know I hurt you,” I said. “Saying those things about Jesse. But I love you, Ty. You’re the one. You’re the one I want to be with. I love you with all my heart.”

He looked away. Didn’t say anything.

“Is it because of what happened during the fever?” I said finally.

“That’s part of it. But I’m so glad and relieved you’re okay, Abby.”

He paused.

“It’s just that it’s made me realize that this whole other world between us is so big. I don’t understand it, and that’s okay as long as there’s nothing too serious going on. But this. This made me realize that you see something that I’ll never see. You’re part of something I can’t ever be part of.”