1848453051 (18 page)
Authors: Linda Kavanagh
‘I feel guilty about going – I vowed to stay through sickness and health, and now I’m abandoning him, and leaving him to his demons!’ Laura whispered, a tremor in her voice.
‘Forget about Jeff, and get out this very minute!’ Kerry urged her. ‘Shall I come over and help you pack?’
‘No – I don’t want to risk another confrontation,’ Laura whispered. She could imagine Jeff’s fury when he found out she’d left him. He’d see it as a massive betrayal, and he’d never forgive her. ‘Besides, I have a better idea,’ she added.
Laura explained to her friend what she intended to do, and Kerry reluctantly agreed.
‘I’ll make up your bed in the second bedroom,’ she replied. ‘And I’ll be over first thing tomorrow morning – after Jeff’s gone for the day – to put the first stage of your plan into operation.’
‘Thanks, love,’ Laura whispered, tears in her eyes. As always, her dear friend was there for her when she needed support.
‘Y
ou sneaky bitch!’ Jeff hollered down the phone. ‘You moved your clothes out bit by bit, so that I wouldn’t notice! You planned this whole thing with that so-called friend of yours!’
‘I’m sorry, Jeff, but there was no other way,’ Laura said, gripping her mobile phone tightly. ‘If I’d told you face to face that I was leaving, you’d have tried to stop me.’
‘Damn right I would’ve!’
Laura felt brave enough to state her case now that she was in the safety of Kerry’s apartment.
‘I can’t live in fear all the time. I really did love you, but I couldn’t keep letting you hit me. You need to get help.’
There was a pause at the other end of the line. ‘Will you come back to me if I get help?’
Laura sighed. ‘No, Jeff – I’m sorry. You’ve made me so afraid that all the love I had for you got pushed out of the way.’
She could hear him crying in the background, and her own eyes filled with tears. It would be tempting to run back to him and try to soothe his pain, but it would never work.
‘I love you, Laura – more than I’ve ever loved anyone. I’m so sorry for what I’ve done to you – I’ll get help immediately. But please come back to me.’
Laura wiped away a tear. She could hear the anguish in his voice. She could picture the little boy, terrified of his parents’
wrath, but who had nevertheless absorbed their violent way of dealing with problems.
‘Sorry, Jeff – I can’t. I wish things didn’t have to end this way, but I don’t want to be scared any more.’
She heard a sob at the other end of the phone.
‘Please, Laura – give me another chance.’
He sounded so contrite and, momentarily, Laura caught a glimpse of the old Jeff, the man who’d been charming, tender and affectionate when they first met. He’d been so anxious for things to go right, and she’d needed to assure him that she genuinely liked his company and wasn’t going to drop him. But as soon as they got married, the boot was suddenly on the other foot, and she’d learnt how quickly he could switch from being nice to being nasty.
‘No, Jeff – it’s over,’ she said firmly. ‘I can’t risk anything else happening to me. We haven’t even been married a full year yet – what state would I be in if I stayed with you for another year? Accept it, Jeff. It’s over.’
S
ylvia sighed as she bent to pick up the trail of toys that Pete had left in his wake. He was now having his afternoon nap, and she intended dozing in a comfortable chair while she had the chance. She could be sure of an hour before he was likely to wake up again.
After placing the toys in the toy box, Sylvia eased herself into one of the club chairs in the living room. She felt large and cumbersome, and even the slightest exertion winded her. But she was coming to the end of her pregnancy, and for that she was grateful. Soon, the tiredness and the bloated ankles would hopefully be a thing of the past.
In the silence of the room, Sylvia tried to relax, hoping that the birth would be quick and hassle-free this time. Pete’s birth had been difficult, and her doctor had already warned her that she might need a Caesarean section. She patted her bump. As far as she was concerned, it was definitely a girl, because this pregnancy felt decidedly different from her last, and she was carrying all her extra weight to the front. Hadn’t she made that very comment to Alan, about Ellie Beckworth?
As her thoughts turned once again to the enigmatic woman who lived only half a mile away, Sylvia shook her head in mystification. She’d hoped that by helping Ellie to give birth, she might manage to forge a bond with the other woman. Afterwards, she’d hoped that an invitation to tea might be forthcoming, or even a phone call to suggest they meet for a cuppa in a local café. But Ellie had retreated into her shell again, and Sylvia was left feeling that she herself was somehow to blame.
As she lay back in the chair, Sylvia reviewed her behaviour while in Ellie’s house, concluding yet again that she hadn’t done anything to warrant being dismissed so summarily. The only conclusion she could reach was that Ellie Beckworth was simply a very private person, and didn’t need or want friends.
Sylvia sighed as she contemplated her final visit to the obstetrician the following day, when decisions would be made about the type of birth she would have. She wished she had a friend to accompany her, because Alan was taking the afternoon off to mind Pete. It would have been nice to have Ellie there, reassuring her that all would be well. Alan did his best to be supportive, but a man couldn’t possibly empathise in the way that another woman could.
A wail from the nursery broke the peace of the afternoon, and Sylvia struggled to her feet. Pete had woken much earlier than usual. She wondered if somehow he was aware that changes in their family dynamic were imminent, because the more she longed to rest, the more he seemed to demand her undivided attention.
In the nursery, Pete was standing at the bars of his cot, his face red on one side from sleeping, his curls matted with sweat. His mouth was open in the rictus of a scream, and Sylvia tried to comfort him as she lifted him out of his cot. His nappy was wet and he seemed to weigh a ton, and Sylvia wished she’d accepted Alan’s offer of a live-in nurse during the latter stages of her pregnancy. But she’d been determined to be independent, hoping it might cast her in a more favourable light with her husband. Since she looked so ungainly and always felt tired, there was no other way she could hope to compete with the mystery lover whom she still feared that Alan had taken. She continued to hope that the news of her pregnancy might have dispatched the other woman, but she had no way of knowing if her rival was even aware of it.
As she placed Pete on the changing mat, Sylvia gave a start. Had she just had a contraction? She wasn’t due for another week! As Pete continued to cry, Sylvia felt her patience snapping, and she experienced what definitely felt like another contraction as she removed the child’s soiled nappy. She felt a moment of panic – she was alone with a crying baby, and feeling as though she’d definitely started labour.
After putting a clean nappy on him, Sylvia placed her screaming son back in his cot, despite his very loud protests.
Hurrying into the hall, Sylvia lifted the phone and dialled the factory.
‘Alan,’ she told him peremptorily, ‘you’d better come home. My labour has definitely started.’
When Alan arrived at Treetops the following afternoon, he tried to hide his elation, but Ellie could see how secretly thrilled he was. ‘Sylvia had a seven-pound baby girl by Caesarean section,’ he told her, trying to sound unconcerned out of respect for Ellie’s feelings, but he was finding it impossible to stop smiling.
‘So I heard – congratulations,’ Ellie replied, trying to keep the note of sourness out of her voice. The birth was already being talked about in the village. She’d been told all about it that morning, by a woman whose husband worked at the factory.
Alan sighed. He knew how jealous and hurt Ellie was feeling about his other life, and he was anxious to keep her as content and even-tempered as possible.
Ellie looked at him defiantly, daring him to show any sympathy for Sylvia. She felt decidedly jealous of this new child – the one born on the right side of the blanket – who was now heralded with gifts and welcomed into the community at large. The workers at the factory had already made a collection and bought a gigantic teddy bear for the little girl. Needless to say, there had been no such gifts after the birth of her own daughter.
‘What are you going to call her?’
Alan hesitated, not wanting to seem too excited and involved with this new child of his. ‘Sylvia wants to call her Laura.’
Ellie nodded. ‘That’s a nice name,’ she said stiffly. ‘I think I should send Sylvia some flowers – after all, she sent me a bouquet when Kerry was born.’
Alan nodded. He supposed Ellie had no other choice. He knew Sylvia would be pleased to receive them – he just hoped she wouldn’t see them as an opportunity to reconnect with Ellie.
‘Wouldn’t you like to see your eldest daughter?’ Ellie said tartly, reminding him that he already had a female child.
‘Of course! That’s one of the reasons I’m here,’ Alan replied, chastened. He was well aware that Ellie’s nose was out of joint, and that he needed to appease her.
In the living room, young Kerry was sleeping in her cradle. Alan caressed her cheek as she slept, then bent down to kiss her, aware that Ellie was watching his every move. He felt as though he was on a tightrope, caught between the two women in his life. One wrong move and he could plummet to unimaginable depths.
‘Will you be visiting us later this evening?’
Alan knew he was being tested. If he spent too long with this latest child of his, there would be hell to pay from Ellie. But he had to spend time with Sylvia and baby Laura in the hospital. Sometimes he found it difficult to manage these two very separate lives.
‘I can’t manage tonight, my love, but I’ll be here tomorrow afternoon. Is that okay?’
Ellie nodded, relieved that at least he wasn’t forsaking their usual arrangement. But it was clear that she was far from happy. Alan made a mental note to buy her a special gift – one that would make her feel cherished and appreciated – and something for Kerry. If he forgot a gift for the child, his head would be on the block.
Much to Ellie’s chagrin, Alan left shortly afterwards. This was the second time they hadn’t made love the minute he arrived, and Ellie knew that he was controlling his passion for her out of respect for Sylvia.
Damn the woman, Ellie thought, as Alan’s car drove out the gate. She now felt diminished by Sylvia’s ability to produce the perfect family – a boy and a girl – for Alan. In her daydreams, Ellie had imagined Sylvia having a second boy, while she would have a daughter, who’d therefore have a special place in Alan’s heart by virtue of being his only female child. But now, her child was effectively ousted by this new, tiny interloper.
‘S
tay here for as long as you like,’ Kerry told her, as she and Laura sat in the kitchen of Kerry’s apartment. ‘Don’t even think of moving into a place of your own yet. You need time to get your head together – I mean, it must all have been a terrible shock. And after the miscarriage, too, you’re bound to be feeling down, and in need of some TLC.’
Laura smiled gratefully. ‘Thanks, love – I really appreciate all your support. But I can’t impose on you indefinitely –’
Kerry laughed. ‘Hang on, you’ve only been here for a few days! When you’ve been here for a few months, I might think about throwing you out!’
‘Seriously, I feel I should start making plans. I don’t want Jeff thinking that I’m a weakling who can’t stand on my own two feet.’
Kerry frowned. ‘You’re still letting him rule your life. He’s gone, so to hell with him. You must do what’s best for you.’
‘Well, I still think it’s best if I get my own place. You know what they say about guests and fish!’
Kerry laughed. ‘By all means start checking out places. I’ll gladly look at apartments with you, but there’s no rush.’ She squeezed her friend’s arm in an affectionate gesture. ‘You don’t want to push yourself too hard. You’ve been through so much lately, and I actually enjoy having you here.’
Laura shivered. ‘Thank goodness I never told Jeff about the
money – you were right as usual, and I’ve been such a fool! I could have made such a mess of things if you hadn’t suggested I delay telling him –’
Kerry patted her shoulder. ‘There’s no point in stressing yourself about it now. You did the right thing, and that’s all that matters.’
Laura nodded, looking at the bare third finger of her left hand. Before leaving the apartment she’d shared with Jeff, she’d taken off her wedding and engagement rings and left them in an envelope. Then she grimaced, remembering the wedding presents she’d had to leave behind in the flat.
‘I’m sorry about leaving that fabulous coffee machine you gave us,’ she said ruefully. ‘It was a lovely gift, and I know you went to a lot of expense. But I don’t ever want to set foot in that flat again, and I doubt if Jeff will surrender it willingly.’
Kerry hugged her. ‘Don’t give it another thought – a coffee machine is nothing compared to your safety. There are plenty of coffee machines in the world, but there’s only one you. Look, you’re safe, and you’re a free woman again,’ Kerry said equably. ‘It could have been a lot worse.’
Laura nodded. ‘How was I so easily fooled? You saw through him early on, but I was such an idiot.’
