18 Deader Homes and Gardens (37 page)
“About time, Sherlock,” I muttered.
18
Two days later, after I’d been sequestered in Jorgeson’s office for many hours to explain my incomparable deductions and a few minor glitches, Peter and I escaped for lunch at the sort of restaurant where one does not use one’s cell phone without overt disapproval from the maître d’. We’d already had the usual conversation about my selfless, civic-minded contributions to the successful solution of the crimes. For some reason, he seemed to think that I’d promised not to meddle with the subterfuge occurring at Hollow Valley. Peter’s only flaw is his single-mindedness. I try to overlook it.
After he’d ordered wine, he said, “How long is Jordan staying with us?”
“Her parents will be home in two weeks. For once in her life, Caron has been a good role model. Jordan’s acting like a normal pain-in-the-ass teenager. Besides, we can’t send her back to Aunt Margaret Louise. She’s probably in Brazil or one of those countries without an extradition treaty. She warned me that they underestimated her. She had ten minutes to transfer every dollar of the Hollow Valley Nursery business account to the Caymans, jump in her car, and peel out before you arrived. Rather impressive. I don’t know how to balance my checkbook without a calculator.”
“Felicia’s the only one in the clear,” Peter said. “Ethan and Charles are in federal custody, and Nattie’s scheduled for a psych evaluation. We’ll attempt to extradite Margaret Louise if or when we find her. Jorgeson’s busy dealing with the ATF, the FBI, the ME, and the chief—who is not happy with me.”
“I tried to keep you out of it. I fully intended to have everything neatly wrapped up before your plane landed. If Jorgeson had been less patient with the state lab, he would have figured it out himself. I have chigger bites and an excruciatingly painful ankle because he was willing to wait for weeks to get the results. I didn’t enjoy crawling through weeds, you know. I could have come face-to-face with a mountain lion!”
The maître d’ shot us a dark look as he oversaw the uncorking of the wine. I lowered my voice. “Have the police located Pandora Butterfly?”
“Not yet, but they’re watching the bars and dives. Her children are in temporary foster care. Their caseworker put in for early retirement this morning.”
I didn’t bother to roll my eyes. “It’s for the best. Even if Pandora is detained, she won’t demand that they be returned to her. Felicia called me this morning. She and her daughter have plans to meet. If Charles gets out on bail, he may find himself home alone, unable to use a can opener or the microwave. At least he can have potluck meals at his church once a week.”
A waiter appeared to take our orders. After some prodding from me, Peter told me about the hijacking in Missouri. He gave me an annoyed look when I innocently inquired if it had taken place near Cuba. “Or Mexico,” I added. “One of those foreign places.”
“The truck was full of cases of cigarettes. The potential profit was enormous. All Ethan had to do was put counterfeit tax stamps on the packs so they would appear to be legal. There’s a term for that. It’s called ‘butt-legging.’”
My laughter warranted a frown from the maître d’. “Is that all you learned at ATF camp?”
Peter looked at me across the table with his molasses-colored eyes. “Let’s have a peaceful lunch. I’ll be at the PD the rest of the day. Don’t you have an appointment this afternoon with a lawyer with a bizarre name?”
“
We
have an appointment,” I said firmly. “Cancel your plans for the rest of the day. I intend to be inconsolable.” I came close to bursting into tears but caught myself before the maître d’ descended on us once again.
* * *
Peter picked me up at three, and we drove in silence to Link Cranberry’s office. I’d prepared myself by rehearsing mild expressions of disappointment and cramming tissues in my purse. My darling husband seemed grim, although I doubted he would create a scene. I reminded myself that I most certainly would prefer not to.
Once we were seated in her office, she flipped through some papers and said, “Terry insisted on signing a simple will that named me as the executor of his estate. I filed it Monday morning, so it’s a matter of public record. Everything of value, including Winston’s art, goes to charities.”
My composure was going south. Peter squeezed my hand until I was able to say, “That’s good.”
Cranberry took off her glasses and gave me a quirky little smile. “He left a stipulation that if he died unexpectedly, he wanted you to have the house. I don’t think we need to worry about the lawsuit, since the plaintiffs have more pressing concerns. You’ll have to pay fair market value.”
I bit down on my lip as I stared at Peter. “The neighborhood is much improved. None of the Hollows will sell their property, so we’ll have complete privacy. The nursery is bankrupt. We can move in immediately.”
“If that’s what you want,” my handsome, adorable, lovable husband said before he leaned over and kissed me.
There are moments when he can read my mind.
ALSO BY JOAN HESS
THE ARLY HANKS MYSTERIES
Malice in Maggody
Mischief in Maggody
Much Ado in Maggody
Madness in Maggody
Mortal Remains in Maggody
Maggody in Manhattan
O Little Town of Maggody
Martians in Maggody
Miracles in Maggody
The Maggody Militia
Misery Loves Maggody
Maggody and the Moonbeams
Muletrain to Maggody
Malpractice in Maggody
The Merry Wives of Maggody
THE CLAIRE MALLOY MYSTERIES
Strangled Prose
The Murder at the Murder at the Mimosa Inn
Dear Miss Demeanor
A Really Cute Corpse
A Diet to Die For
Roll Over and Play Dead
Death by the Light of the Moon
Poisoned Pins
Tickled to Death
Busy Bodies
A Holly, Jolly Murder
Closely Akin to Murder
A Conventional Corpse
Out on a Limb
The Goodbye Body
Damsels in Distress
Mummy Dearest
This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.
DEADER HOMES AND GARDENS.
Copyright © 2012 by Joan Hess. All rights reserved. For information, address St. Martin’s Press, 175 Fifth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10010.
The Library of Congress has cataloged the print version as follows:
Hess, Joan.
Deader homes and gardens : a Claire Malloy mystery / Joan Hess.—1st ed.
p. cm.
ISBN 978-0-312-36362-8 (hardcover)
ISBN 978-1-4299-5074-9 (e-book)
1. Malloy, Claire (Fictitious character)—Fiction. I. Title.
PS3558.E79785D366 2012
813'.54—dc23
2011033690
e-ISBN 9781429950749
First Edition: February 2012
