1,001 Facts That Will Scare the S#*t Out of You: The Ultimate Bathroom Reader (53 page)

385

FACT :
Americans use
36.5 billion rolls of toilet paper
every year, which represents at least 15 million trees pulped.
Then my mother-in-law can wipe out an entire forest in just one trip to the can.

Justin Thomas, “Bidets: Eliminate Toilet Paper, Increase Your Hygiene,”
www.treehugger.com
.

386

FACT :
Steatorrhea is the presence of
excess quantities of fat in stools
, and is frequently a sign of a malabsorption syndrome such as celiac disease, cystic fibrosis, and chronic pancreatitis.
The first sign of steatorrhea? Floaters.

Richard Ravel, Clinical Laboratory Medicine: Clinical Application of Laboratory Data, 6th ed. (Elsevier Health Sciences, 1994).

387

FACT :
Oliguria is extremely low urine output, similar to anuria, a condition in which the body stops making urine.
Both symptoms are classic signs of renal failure
, but can also indicate a urinary blockage or insufficient blood supply to the kidneys.
Old man: Doctor, I can’t pee anymore. Doctor: How old are you? Old man: 97. Doctor: You’ve peed enough.

Prasad Devarajan and Louise M Williams, “Oliguria,” December 3, 2008, eMedicine,
www.emedicine.medscape.com
.

388

FACT :
Fecal transplant is becoming an increasingly popular option in the treatment of severe bacterial infections such as the Superbug (
Clostridium difficile
), which is resistant to many antibiotics. The transplant calls for
the use of disease-free feces from a patient’s close relative
, whose bacteria somehow defeat the infection.
“Um, hi, Dad, how’s it going? This is a little awkward, but I have a favor to ask . . . .”

Rose George, The Big Necessity: The Unmentionable World of Human Waste and Why It Matters (St. Martin’s Press, 2008).

389

FACT :
The Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh (RSS) is developing a
soft drink made from the urine of cows
. In parts of India, cow urine is considered sacred.
Names being considered for the drink include: Mr. Whizz, Cud-wine, and Holy Coly.

Matthias Williams, “They call it Mellow Yellow?” Reuters, February 12, 2009,
www.reuters.com
.

390

FACT :
Experts estimate that
more than 21 billion diapers are dumped into U.S. landfills each year
.

Plastics used in many disposable diapers can take hundreds of years to degrade, and the byproducts of that breakdown can seep into the soil and create hazards to public water supplies.
It’s hard to imagine any plastic lasting more than a few days against the noxious fury of hot steaming baby poop.

“Disposable Diaper Statistics,” Hamptons Diaper Co.,
www.hamptonsdiapers.com
.

391

FACT :
The largest water-contamination disease outbreak in U.S. history occurred in 1993, when the Milwaukee, Wisconsin water supply was infected with the parasite
Cryptospordium
.
The tainted water killed 100 people and made 400,000 others sick
. Many experts blamed the outbreak on sewage that is regularly dumped into Lake Michigan.
Most of the bad water was used to make Old Milwaukee beer, so no one noticed.

Rose George, The Big Necessity: The Unmentionable World of Human Waste and Why It Matters (St. Martin’s Press, 2008).

Centers For Disease Control and Prevention,
www.cdc.gov
.

392

FACT :
Most people produce one to four pints of gas and
pass it approximately fourteen times daily
.
Keep in mind that fourteen is an average. Some people fart more often, cutting a steady stream of smaller “fartettes” throughout the day, while others dispatch their gas with fewer but beefier blasts.

“Gas in the Digestive Tract,” National Digestive Diseases Information Clearinghouse, National Institute of Diabetes and Digestive and Kidney Diseases, National Institutes of Health, January 2008,
www.digestive.niddk.nih.gov
.