1,001 Facts That Will Scare the S#*t Out of You: The Ultimate Bathroom Reader (129 page)

Arkady Leokum and K. R. Hobbie, The Little Giant Book of Weird & Wacky Facts (Sterling Publishing Company, 2005).

990

FACT :
The world’s largest mammal, the blue whale, also has the largest penis in the animal kingdom, measuring about
ten feet long and a foot in diameter
.
I bet it works like a rudder. They can steer with it.

Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).

991

FACT :
“Dork” is the proper term for
whale penis
, hence the derogatory term.
Calling someone “whale dick” just doesn’t have the same ring to it.

Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).

992

FACT :
Medorthophobia is
the fear of an erect penis
.
Must be a female thing, because guys are only afraid of the opposite problem.

Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).

993

FACT :
Capuchin monkeys often greet each other by
showing off their erections
.

My dog does the same thing, but you have to pet him first.

Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).

994

FACT :
In the fifth century, castration was believed
to cure the plague
.
It worked, too. The disease disappeared among men virtually overnight.

Shane Mooney, Useless Sexual Trivia: Tastefully Prurient Facts about Everyone’s Favorite Subject (Simon & Schuster, 2000).

995

FACT :
Actor Rudolph Valentino’s dog reportedly
haunts his former owner’s gravesite
.
Looking for his goddamn dinner.

Varla Ventura, The Book of the Bizarre: Freaky Facts & Strange Stories (Weiser, 2008).

996

FACT :
In August 2007,
more than 75,000 Elvis fans
descended on Graceland to commemorate the thirtiest anniversary of the singer’s death.
Most of them even fatter and on more drugs than Elvis was when he died.

Varla Ventura, The Book of the Bizarre: Freaky Facts & Strange Stories (Weiser, 2008).

997

FACT :
The longest case of hiccups on record lasted
sixty-nine years
.
That’s one patient hiccuper. I think I’d leap off a bridge after 69 hours.

Katharine Kenah, The Bizarre Body (School Specialty Publishing, 2004).

998

FACT :
An iceberg spotted by the U.S. Coast Guard in 1956 was
roughly the size of Belgium
.
And probably a lot more interesting.

Barbara Seuling, Earth Is Like a Giant Magnet: And Other Freaky Facts About Planets, Oceans, and Volcanoes (Coughlan Publishing, 2007).

999

FACT :
Queen Isabella of Spain lived to be fifty years old, but
bathed just twice
in her lifetime.
She was so dirty, even the flies refused to land on her. Even dirt wouldn’t stick to her. When she walked past a pigpen, all the pigs would hold their noses.