1 Dicey Grenor (35 page)

Remi
was standing over Ming pissing on her. “I hope you
didn’t think I was going to fuck the bitch who just tried to kill you,” he
said.

I smiled.
Remi
was my man. “If you like doing that so much, I think
Franco may have a job for you in the Mozart room with other
coprophilia
and
urolagnia
freaks.

“You mean the shit
and piss room.”

“Exactly.”

He shook his dick
clean and zipped up his pants.
“
Naw
.
My girlfriend’s a corpse. That’s all I need.”

We shared a warm,
intimate smile,
then
planned our exit.

Remi
carried her out like she was passed out drunk. He
drove to Hades then waited in the lot as I took her body in the back door.
After explaining Ming’s connection with VET and Agent Monroe to Franco, I
emptied the contents of my duffle bag until I found Ming’s device as proof.
Franco gladly tossed her body in the incinerator. No amount of holy water in
her system kept her from turning to ash. Just the way Ivan had.

Very
fitting, if you asked me.

Remi
and I went back to his man cave and discussed our
future. The one
Saybree
had mentioned.
The one involving a formal ritual that would make
Remi
my day companion.
We’d be bound ’til death, he
as my protector,
me
as his. If I died the final death,
he would too. If he died, I had an opportunity to turn him within three days of
his death, though
Remi
was adamant he did not want to
exercise that benefit.

As my
compagnon
de jour, he would still be human, subject to
diseases and illnesses. Except with regular consumption of my blood, he’d heal
faster, enjoy superhuman abilities, have a psychic bond with me, and age much
slower. Eventually, we’d have to move because people would notice we didn’t age
at a normal rate.

These were all
things he had to consider.

 
Which he did…and still wanted the position.

But the decision
wasn’t just up to him.

So in another
attempt to talk to Aaron, I shifted him in during sex with
Remi
.
I slowly revealed my fangs, my eyes.
Gradually explained our
bond, our physical and mental connection.
Quickly ran through events of
the previous few days and nights…and I did all this while I rode him like a
pro. Right as he was coming, I explained what
Remi
wanted to commit to and asked what Aaron thought. “Yes! Yes!
Yessss
!” was the only answer he gave.

Great.
That was the only one I wanted to hear.

As we lay in
post-coital bliss, Aaron finally talked about his kidnapping. He had been
vacationing in Mexico with his parents when all hell had broken loose. He, his
ten-year-old sister, and mother had been left in the car with the windows
rolled down while his dad had gotten out
to ask
for
directions. His mother had been held at gunpoint and he and his sister were
blindfolded and forced into the trunk of a car. They had been captured by
pornographers who specialized in underage children.

It wasn’t long
before they were told to do the unthinkable.
The
unimaginable.
Together.
On
camera.
If they didn’t they would be raped brutally by the kidnappers.
Aaron just couldn’t do it. Not to save himself or his sister. She had begged
him to kill her. She knew the bad guys had planned to kill them both anyway
since they hadn’t worn masks. There was no way she and Aaron would get away
with a description of the perpetrators.

At least, Aaron
would be gentle, she reasoned. At least she would not be violated.

Aaron loved her so
much, he couldn’t do that either.

So he witnessed
things done to her that he could not even repeat to me all these years later.

I didn’t need
details.

The last thing he
remembered was holding her while she screamed for him to kill her, to take her
out of her misery, to show kindness by delivering death. He had blanked out.
When he came to, she was dead, in his arms, eyes frozen wide. He remembered the
look of peace on her face, of gratefulness.

Their kidnappers,
on the other hand, were outraged. He remembered a dull knife being held over his
genitalia and them threatening to cut it off unless he had sex with his sister’s
corpse. He passed out again. This time, when he awakened he lay next to her on
the cot with evidence that he had performed, with no memory of it.

Unfortunately, it
had all been recorded.

The kidnappers had
only intended to sell the tape on the black market to other perverts, until
they saw Aaron’s mother and father on the news pleading for their children’s
lives and safe returns. Being the opportunists they were
,
the kidnappers sent a copy of the video to Aaron’s father demanding ransom in
exchange for the footage not being released to the media.

Aaron had blanked
out shortly after discovering the kidnappers’ new and improved plan. He later
learned from
Remi’s
diary recount that
Remi
had stolen the same knife Aaron had been threatened
with and stabbed one of the kidnappers one hundred, eleven times. He managed to
escape and was reunited with his parents, who could not face him after seeing
the video.

Interesting how
Remi
kept waking up after the killings thinking he had done
them.

Sadly, Aaron’s
mother ended up in an asylum, where she died a year later. They never found his
sister’s body. Never gave her a proper burial.
   

It was the saddest
tale I had ever heard. Due to no fault of his own—the day Aaron had been
kidnapped, was the day he had lost his whole family.
Lost his
family and his grip on reality.

No wonder he was
so mixed up.

Well, he had me. I
accepted each sordid part of him. From the little boy stuck inside him who
never made it out of that shithole to the
necrophiliac
who fucked the blowup doll in the closet because he couldn’t find a steady,
understanding girlfriend.

Until
now.

So Aaron,
Remi
,
Saybree
, and I had a date.
Next full moon, which was in two weeks, we’d have ourselves a vampire-human
ritual.

Chapter 45

 
It was one week ago that I had fought Ming and
watched her take a dirt nap at
Vlad’s
hands…uh, belt.
One week ago that I had fucked
Remi
and made love to Aaron.
Learned Aaron’s secrets and divulged mine. Made
a pact with Aaron and
Remi
that involved an upcoming
ritual that meant more to me than when I was turned by Max.

Oh, yeah—and it
had been one week ago that I had moved in with them.

Until Franco eased
up on his no-humans-allowed-in-
Hades’s
-basement rule,
I had to move out.
Had to leave the safety of his sanctuary.
No sense in bringing up the fact
Cin
had been in the
basement. If I was to protect them and they were to protect me, and if we
needed to share blood often,
Remi
, Aaron, and I needed
to live closer to each other anyway. Plus, their place was
niiice
.
They had even gotten a coffin though I had yet to use it. Since they had also
installed wooden window shutters that operated by voice command, I slept in the
bed with them.

Aaron had agreed
to my plan to put all his alternates on a schedule, so I did.
Except
Remi
and
Vlad
.
Remi
shifted randomly and I got the feeling I wouldn’t
see
Vlad
again until an execution was in order.
Between
Remi
and Aaron shifting unpredictably, there
was never a dull moment. Especially since
Remi
was
trying to quit smoking. That made him extra twitchy.

Turns out, Franco,
who appeared to know most everything, had not discerned Ming’s true thoughts
and purpose because as
Saybree
had said, there was a
protective shield around the foot queen. She was not a supernatural being, but
the holy water insulated her, blocking her spirit from supernatural
interference. The force was with her, so to speak.

Good thing Aaron
had been there. And good thing he had a personality more than capable of
getting down and dirty because I wouldn’t have been able to kill Ming. I would
have wanted to, but only another human could. Aaron’s human involvement was
exactly what was necessary to break past the holy shield and send Ming back to
her maker.
Or wherever she was destined.

When Monroe had
come in to question us about Ming’s disappearance, he got no further than the
front door. Franco and I had induced the help of Mr. Cash, in his official
capacity as Congressman McNair, to get a restraining order against Monroe. His
continuous harassment after we had disproved his theory that I was a vampire
was illegal. According to the judge’s injunction, Monroe would be arrested and
subject to civil penalties if he came within five hundred feet of me.
  

There were no laws
to protect vampires, but there were plenty to protect humans.
Even humans who had been accused of being vampires.
As long as the evidence proved otherwise.
And since vampires
could be tried, convicted, and executed out of court, when someone proved he or
she was
homo
sapiens, no court order was necessary to
cease a VET investigation. Case closed.

For
now.

As long as
security kept cameras out of Hades and I didn’t stab myself again onstage, all
should be well.

I had also gotten
by to see my parents as I’d promised God while I was between
consciousness
,
lying on the floor of the blood lab. I had gone alone, walked up to the house,
and chickened out at the last minute. Peeping through the bay window into the
well-lit dining room, I saw them all sitting at the table eating.
My mom, dad, brothers, nieces, and nephews.
They looked
happy.
So much so that I didn’t want to intrude.
Didn’t
feel like having one of those
prodigal-daughter-returns-home-after-school-special moments. So I left.

At least I had
fulfilled my promise. I had
seen
them.

What else?

Well, Punch and
Fire got engaged and started planning a destination wedding. Hawaii, I think.

Guess who was not
invited.

I just wished the
best for them. Hope they lived happily ever after, blah, blah, blah. They
better had considering how his being with her precluded him from being with a
pack because wolves did not typically interrelate with dragons. He wouldn’t
even be able to have children unless he mated with another wolf. He was
throwing it all away for her.
Romantic…or stupid?
Time
would tell.

Thankfully, I’d
gotten around to making my purchase from Amazon. I’d bought something that was
going to teach Fire I was not her bitch the next time she got jealous and
attacked me. I’d known for a while I was going to need an extinguisher for her,
and if the internet had been working in the basement that day, our little spat
would have had different results. But the past was the past…and I’d be ready
next time. Hoped Punch would understand.

Speaking of werewolves…

Dario’s blood lab
was on the news. The break-in was being investigated. Not because anything was
stolen, but because Dario had gone missing. Apparently, remnants of blood were
found on the ceiling, though no body parts were reported.
Made
me wonder if Dario had eaten them and left to grow body hair and long canines.

So much had
happened within the past few weeks that I had been the first one to show up for
Dr. Floyd’s support group meeting. As usual, I did no talking, but it felt good
listening to everyone else’s sleep disorder issues.
Reminder
that it could always be worse.

After the meeting,
Dr. Floyd had spoken to me about my blood results again. In his smart British
accent, he told me my blood was ancient, dating back to old Germany. And just as
I thought he was about to tell me he had reported me to VET, he said he would
help me find a cure for narcolepsy…and vampirism, if I wanted.

Something to think
about, I guess.

I had also seen
Ivan a few times. We went for long walks through the cemetery and he watched me
perform at Hades a few times. I wanted him to get whatever closure he needed in
order to pass on to the other side. It just didn’t seem to be working.

When I asked
Franco about it, he said it may take time, but not to worry. Once I died the
final death, Ivan would move on to his version of the final death too.

Ha
ha
.

So now I was
meandering around
Hades’s
Graveyard room, chatting
with patrons, encouraging them to spend more money on booze and aphrodisiacs…and
prophylactics. Suddenly, I started choking, gagging. Not wanting to gross
anyone out, I ran to the bathroom and took a long look at myself in the mirror.
I was no longer gagging and nothing seemed amiss. Making my way out again, I
stopped halfway to the door. My body was
buzzing,
vibrating
low and then more intensely until I was trembling like Hades was in the middle
of a California earthquake. What the…