01 - The Heartbreaker (32 page)

“You are one pathetic human being,” Rick said to Chase as he leaned against the wall.

Although everyone was nervous for Roman and Charlotte, that wouldn’t stop Rick from ganging up on Chase in the meantime. And since Rick knew Chase wouldn’t leave until the baby was born, he had Chase cornered. “So
I’m
pathetic, huh?”

“That’s what he said.” Hannah came up beside them, bouncing from foot to foot, excited beyond belief at the prospect of being crowned baby-sitter.

“Go away, squirt. I’m trying to talk to my brother,” Rick said.

Hannah shook her head. “There’s no talking to Chase when his mind’s made up about something. At least that’s what you always say.” The pretty fourteen-year-old grinned, laughing wickedly.

Rick groaned. “You’re not helping.”

“Oh, I think she is.” Chase leaned closer to Hannah and whispered, “What else does Rick say about me?”

“Hmm.” She twirled a long strand of hair around her finger
and pursed her lips in thought. “He says you’ve been a pain in the ass since Sloane left. That you should have gotten down on your hands and knees and begged.” She paused to giggle. “But it probably wouldn’t have mattered, since Sloane got out while the getting was good.” She nodded, apparently satisfied she’d hit on all pertinent details.

“Tsk, tsk.” Rick said, winking at Hannah. “There’s no allowance for you this week, kid.”

“Hannah, you get over here and leave Rick and Chase alone,” Kendall called from across the room.

Rick rolled his eyes. “Too little, too late,” he informed his wife.

Kendall shrugged. “I tried.” Then she turned her attention back to Raina, who was sitting on the couch, browsing through a magazine.

Chase dug one sneakered foot against the linoleum floor, wondering how much to tell Rick about Sloane leaving him. “I never figured you had much of a brain, but I have to admit you nailed things with me and Sloane.”

Rick raised an eyebrow. “What happened?” he asked, all signs of joking and laughter gone from both his tone and expression.

When things got serious, the brothers were there for one another, ribbing and kidding put aside. “I did ask her to stay. In a manner of speaking. I told her I’d changed my mind, that I wanted a future.”

“And she left anyway,” Rick said.

The reminder caused an ache in Chase’s already empty heart. “That much is obvious.”

“But you don’t know why.”

Embarrassed to be discussing both his failures and his love life, Chase merely nodded.

“Need me to spell out Sloane’s reasons for you?”

“Might as well start.” How else could Chase fix things? He’d come up empty on his own.

“Sloane knows you well.” Rick pulled up a chair and straddled it, settling in. “Probably as well as Roman and I do, and considering how short a time you’ve been together, that’s saying a lot.”

Chase snorted. “You call this analysis? Tell me something I don’t know.”

Rick shrugged. “Relax. I’m getting there. I’m guessing Sloane thinks you wanted an affair. Short term by definition. No commitment.”

Folding his arms across his chest, Chase eyed his middle sibling. “Again, so far I’m not impressed. This is all obvious.”

“I’m just getting started.” Rick rubbed his hands together in anticipation. “She thinks these things because you used your famous saying:
Safety first, kids never.
Am I right?”

Chase rubbed a weary hand over his burning eyes. “That about sums it up.” It was the same lecture he’d given his brothers over the years, when being forced to perform the fatherly duty of safe-sex discussions. “So?”

“So women have memories like elephants,” Rick explained. “Sloane’s not likely to forget you said that.”

“You’d think she’d appreciate the fact that I looked after her,” Chase muttered.

“She appreciates it, all right. Then she fell in love and all that appreciation flew out the window. Now she wants the house, the white picket fence, the kids,” Rick said, his eyes drifting to his own wife, who sat holding Raina’s hand.

Chase sighed. “I told her I want all those things too.”

“
After
she’d seen Chase Chandler in action. She’s seen you with your family, seen how you put Mom first. If I had to guess, she’s seen you step up in a crisis and pull away in the aftermath.” Rick slanted his head toward Chase, awaiting an answer.

“What the hell makes you think you know me so well?”

His eyes opened wide. “I grew up with you, the model of perfection. You never once bailed on a responsibility. But when
you’re alone and quiet, you withdraw. I’m sure that wasn’t easy for Sloane.”

“Yeah, well, she loves me in spite of it,” Chase said defensively.

“Yet she’s in D.C. and you’re here. What gives?” His brother raised an eyebrow, his challenge obvious.

“She doesn’t believe I love her. Oh shit, that’s not true.” Chase kicked the wall, grateful afterward he was wearing sneakers and caused no damage. “She believes I love her; she just doesn’t believe I want those things you mentioned.” He paced the floor. “Can’t a man change his mind? Women do it all the time and we’re forced to accept it.”

“Women are their own breed. They can do whatever they want and, like you said, we men accept it. It’s our lot in life.”

“I heard that,” Kendall called from across the room, making Chase realize she and his mother had grown silent, listening to Chase’s problems instead.

“And I love you even when you’re eavesdropping,” Rick called back, then faced Chase once more. “Did Sloane have a reason to believe you changed your mind about marriage? Women need proof.”

“Would you quit lumping us all into one broad category?” Raina suggested, getting involved for the first time. “Every woman is an individual. I’m certain Sloane needs proof because she doesn’t want to feel she trapped you into marriage.”

Chase slapped his head with one hand. “When did this become a family conversation?” he muttered. “I have nothing to prove. I love the woman. I want to spend the rest of my damn life with her and she thinks the need will wear off! Have you ever heard anything so ridiculous in your life?”

Raina put down the magazine she’d been thumbing through. “She must have a valid reason.”

He glanced at his mother, annoyed with her attempt to be the voice of reason, and he gritted his teeth. If it weren’t for the fact that dissecting
his
life took the focus off waiting on Charlotte,
he’d walk out on this farce of a conversation now. Hannah, thank God, had gotten engrossed in television and wasn’t paying attention.

“
She must have a valid reason
,” Chase mimicked. But when he let himself think, he was forced to admit the truth. “She does,” he admitted aloud. “Sloane thinks I’ve got this
white-knight complex.
That I feel guilty I wasn’t there when she got shot.”

“Do you?” Kendall asked softly.

“Of course I feel guilty. But I wouldn’t saddle myself with a wife or even consider having kids just because I think I failed her.”

“I hope not,” Raina said.

He glanced at his mother, a woman on the verge of getting her first blood-related grandchild and saw a glimmer of hope in his dim future. “If you mean that, put your matchmaking skills to work and help me get Sloane back,” Chase said to Raina, picking up on the idea he’d had the other day.

“I can’t.” Raina glanced down at her hands, obviously unable to meet Chase’s stare.

“Why the hell not?” he asked in shock. “You’ve spent how many years playing matchmaker against our will? And now when I’m asking . . . no, begging you to help me out, you’re saying no?”

She nodded, eyes still lowered. “That’s right. I’ve learned my lesson. I’m getting married and I’m going to have a life of my own.”

From the doorway came the sound of applause. Eric clapped, obviously proud of Raina and her new leaf. “I just wanted to let you know, Charlotte’s doctor said it shouldn’t be much longer.”

Raina glanced at Eric, and her cheeks glowed. Chase’s gaze traveled between Kendall and Rick, and he witnessed the same adoration. Goddamned envy consumed him. Yeah, he was happy for his mother and siblings, but his entire family possessed what he desired. With Sloane. And he’d struck out.

He turned back to his mother. “Can’t you learn this lesson after you help me?”

“I’m sorry, son, but she’s out of the matchmaking business. And as soon as I get my ring on her finger, where it belongs, I’m going to keep her too busy to meddle. That much I can promise all of you.” With a wave, Eric took off for the delivery room once more, the only person with access other than Roman, who wouldn’t leave his wife’s side.

“Shit,” Chase muttered.

“Would you watch your language?” Kendall asked, placing her hands over her sister’s ears.

Hannah laughed. “Like I don’t hear worse in school?”

“Look, Rick’s got a point,” Kendall told Chase. “I’ve stayed out of this so far, but I’m female and that gives me some wisdom. Add to that, I’ve dealt with a Chandler man who possesses a white-knight complex. I’m more than equipped to give you a few pointers.” She tucked her hair behind her ears and watched him, waiting for permission.

He let out another groan. “Might as well give it a shot. Everyone else has.”

“That’s gratitude for you,” Rick said.

Kendall ignored him, focusing on Chase. “As much as I hate to admit this, Rick’s right. If you love Sloane, and I believe you do or you wouldn’t be so miserable, you’re going to have to convince her you’ve changed.”

“And how do I do that?” he asked Kendall, needing this advice more than he needed his next breath.

Before she could reply, Eric came in to announce to the family that another Chandler had been born. Lilly Chandler, a healthy five-pound, eight-ounce, eighteen-inch baby girl, had come into the world. And Roman, who’d witnessed battlefields and wars up close and personal, had nearly passed out, needing a paper bag and coaching by Eric to resuscitate him.

While the rest of the family headed for the glass doors of the
nursery to wait for their first glimpse of the baby, Kendall pulled Chase aside.

“You gave me advice once. I just want to return the favor.” She smiled at him, accepting him for who and what he was.

“I’d appreciate it.”

She placed a hand on his arm. “Look inside yourself and see what made you the man you were. The man who didn’t want a family. Then figure out why you suddenly do. When you can explain it to yourself, you can pass that wisdom on to Sloane. That’s all she’ll need to believe.” She shrugged as if it were simple.

But why didn’t it feel that way?

Sloane had been in Yorkshire Falls for only a brief time, yet she missed both the town and the people. At home in her Georgetown walk-up, she dressed for her first day back at work with a shirt that let her cater to her bandaged arm, and a determined attitude of renewal.

When she’d taken time off, she’d closed down her small storefront office from which she ran her interior-design business and called her most immediate clients to explain she’d had a family emergency. Though many of her existing clients were antsy, if her overly full answering machine was a judge, there were none who couldn’t be soothed with a phone call and rescheduled appointment. This morning, she had a legal pad full of phone calls to make, consisting of basic things ranging from overdue furniture deliveries to scheduling a pickup on a wall unit a client decided she wasn’t happy with, after all.
Easy enough
, Sloane thought.

She was a people person, something she’d probably learned—she could no longer say inherited—from Michael. Meeting with her clients while trying to combine their needs with her vision normally gave her a great deal of satisfaction. But since her trip to Chase’s hometown, everything here felt bland. Dull. Lifeless.

She tapped the pen on the desktop, reminding herself she lived in Washington, D.C., the nation’s capital. A swinging town
at night and a bustling city during the day. So why did the sleepy upstate New York town and its eclectic citizens draw her so? Or was it just Chase who pulled at her like a magnet? She missed him so bad, she ached.

Shake it off, Sloane. Life goes on,
she reminded herself harshly. She’d let him go so that he could experience the rich life he’d envisioned, the one of a single man who found ultimate success as a journalist. A life no longer tied to family or obligation. She’d never have forgiven herself if she’d accepted his words of love and tied him to a future, only to see regret and longing in his eyes later on.

The jingling of bells signaled she had a visitor and Sloane glanced up.

Her friend Annelise walked in the door, two cups of Starbucks coffee in hand and a scowl on her lips. “Well, well, well, look who came home.” Annelise handed Sloane a
grande
-size cup. “What kind of friend disappears without a word? Doesn’t call? Leaves me to worry?” She sat down, coffee in hand. “I called Madeline and she said you were taking some breathing room,” Annelise said, her voice rising. “Wouldn’t a real friend know if you needed breathing room?” Her pout was as real as her concern.

Sloane’s guilt rose to the surface and she winced. “I’m so sorry.” From the moment she’d overheard Robert and Frank admit Michael wasn’t her father, forcing her to find solace in Chase, Sloane had been single-minded in her pursuit of Samson. And protective of her time with Chase Chandler. All at the expense of her job, her friends, her life.

Yet here she was, back home, engrossed in work, being berated by a concerned friend, and all Sloane could think of was the people she’d left behind. This life no longer felt like hers. In fact, she hadn’t thought about it once since she’d taken off for Yorkshire Falls.

Annelise rapped on Sloane’s desk with her knuckles. “You’re not paying attention to anything I’ve been saying.”

Her friend deserved better. “Annelise, I really am sorry,” Sloane said. “I’ve just been through a major life crisis and . . . I guess I had to do it alone.” She expelled a long breath. “I’m still coming to terms with some changes.”

“I know.” Reaching into her purse, Annelise pulled out the newspaper Sloane had avoided, not wanting to know when her life became public and she’d lost Chase to success.