What Matters Most (21 page)

His thighs were quivering, but he didn’t seem to be struggling to keep them open. Maybe that was pure need, then. God knows Josh felt all quivery inside, but he didn’t want to give Nick any cause to doubt that he knew what he was doing. Josh had topped before, although not often, but he’d bottomed enough to know how it felt when it was done right, knew what he liked. Slicking his cock first then his fingers, he dropped soft kisses on the inside Nick’s thighs, loving the prickly tickle of the man’s hair.

“Such a man,” Josh murmured, his heart swelling with too many emotions to name.

“So sexy.”

Nick squirmed, his cock bouncing as he wiggled his butt. “Are you ever gonna—oh!”

‘Oh’ was right. Nick’s pucker was tightly clenched, fluttering under Josh’s finger. He rubbed the wrinkled skin, pressing with the pad of his finger, soothing, he hoped, some of the fear that had to be pricking at Nick now.

Nick sighed and pushed his butt up, a silent plea for more that Josh had made often enough to recognise. All right then, maybe the fear of penetration hadn’t permeated Nick’s brain yet, but it would. Josh prodded the hole gently, unable to bite back a moan of approval when his finger was sucked in to the first knuckle.

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Nick stilled for a moment, his chest heaving, his hands clenching the blanket. “Oh God, that feels…it’s…Josh!”

Hoping that meant it felt good, Josh worked his finger in deeper, his dick throbbing with each tight squeeze of Nick’s silky walls. That was going to feel so fucking glorious on his cock, rippling and massaging him until Josh’s brain really did melt and spew from his balls.

“More,” Nick grunted, pushing his ass against Josh’s hand.

Josh curved his finger instead and Nick screamed, his shoulders coming up off the bed. Josh rubbed the gland again and Nick yelled again, his cock bouncing. Nick grabbed at his rod, panting and squeezing until the rest of his length turned a dark purplish red.

“I don’t wanna,” Nick got out between pants. “Not yet.”

Josh pulled his finger out then pressed in with two, leaning in to lick Nick’s balls at the same time.

“Stop!” Nick shouted, latching onto Josh’s hair.

Josh froze, two fingers halfway in Nick’s ass. He lifted his head when Nick tugged and found himself smiling at Nick’s rueful expression.

“Like you told me, I’m gonna come if you keep touching me.”

Josh shook his head and wiggled his fingers. “I can’t get you ready if I don’t touch you.”

Nick rolled his eyes and patted Josh’s head. “Just do what you have to down there and leave the rest alone. I want to wait.”

Josh opened his mouth to ask if Nick was sure but snapped it shut when the older man glared. “Got it. Straight to the fucking, then.” Which was fine with him, though he
would
like some time to explore.

The third finger slid in easily by the time Josh dared to insert it. Nick moaned and undulated, his balls drawn tight and his belly wet with pre-cum. The rhythmic clenching of his inner muscles was driving Josh insane, and while he thought he should probably stretch Nick more, he knew neither of them were going to last much longer. He withdrew his fingers and Nick murmured a protest, reaching blindly for Josh’s wrist.

“Got something else for you,” Josh promised, pushing Nick’s legs back against his broad chest. “Unless you don’t—”

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“Josh!” Nick’s eyes snapped open, searing Josh with the need in their depths. “Fuck.

Me. Now.”

“Bossy bottom,” Josh teased even as he shifted his knees under Nick’s ass. “Hold your legs up, hands behind the knees.” He waited until Nick complied, then lined his cock up to Nick’s stretched hole with a shaking hand. This didn’t feel like fucking; it felt like everything in the entire world. Josh braced himself with one hand on the back of Nick’s thigh as he slowly began pressing in. “Bear down, kind of—
ohholyfuckinghell!”
Josh didn’t push in so much as his dick was sucked in, pulled and squeezed by those tight velvety walls his fingers had teased. He didn’t stop until his balls were pressed against Nick’s ass. He held himself still, sweat and goosebumps covering his skin.

Nick’s cheeks were tinted a ruddy colour, his lips parted and his eyes wide. Josh tried to look for any signs of discomfort—there had to be some—but he couldn’t concentrate, not with the hot vice clamping his dick, contracting around it, massaging it.

“God, Josh, do something,” Nick croaked, wiggling his hips. “You’re killing me!”

Josh’s heart plummeted. He jerked his head back and started to scramble off Nick.

“Shit, I’m sorry, I—”

Nick let go of his legs, wrapping them around Josh in an odd and uncomfortable position. “No, sweetheart,
move!
Fuck me already,” he added when Josh still hesitated.

Josh nearly melted with relief. Might have, if he’d been able to move. “Legs,” he pointed out. Nick grumbled but unwound them, hitching them back up close to his chest.

Josh withdrew slowly, watching Nick, noting the increase breath rate, the rapid pulse at his neck, the widely dilated pupils, the flushed lips… How had he missed those signs of pleasure? He let the rim of his cockhead tug at the inside Nick’s hole, pulling a low groan from the man, then filled his ass back up in one long, slow stroke. Another withdraw and thrust, and Josh knew he was going to shoot all too soon. He couldn’t resist the combination of this one man’s body and soul, and he couldn’t take it slow much longer.

Pumping his hips a little harder was what they both needed. Josh let go his fear of being inadequate as a top and began snapping his hips faster and with more force. Nick’s ass clutched and clenched around Josh’s dick, driving him mad, dimming his vision as bright dots danced behind his lids. He reached for Nick’s cock, needing to bring him off, and Nick made a strangled sound that shot to Josh’s balls, drawing them up snug. His spine tingled from end to end, warming him throughout with little bolts of pleasure that blossomed into WHAT MATTERS MOST

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sheer ecstasy. His hand jerked Nick’s shaft desperately; Josh was hovering, tipping dangerously towards climax. Nick’s inner muscles clamped around Josh’s dick so tightly with each thrust in he could hardly hold back.

“God, Nick, please,” Josh begged, opening his eyes to look at the man who held his heart. Nick’s eyes widened then slammed shut as he screamed, hot cum spewing from his dick, spraying Josh’s hand and the hard ridged muscles of Nick’s stomach. “Oh fuck, fuckfuckfuck!” Josh howled, his cock squeezed so hard in the tight silky confines of Nick’s contracting inner muscles that Josh couldn’t move, could only gasp and moan as his orgasm was ripped from him. “Nick!” Josh dropped forward, catching himself on one hand as his dick pulsed and pumped cum into the condom. “God!” He shuddered and clenched his ass, trying to burrow deeper into Nick.

But even as he did and his climax peaked, Josh knew it was truly Nick who’d

burrowed into him. He only hoped he survived it the next time Nick walked away from him.

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“Are you okay?”

Nick blinked his eyes open only to find his vision was blurry, smattered with grey and white spots. Even so, he could make out Josh’s concerned face as the younger man leaned over him. Fearing Josh would pull his dick free and leave, Nick nodded and wrapped his legs around Josh even as he pulled Josh’s head down for an intense kiss. At least, it felt intense to Nick. If Josh’s reaction was anything to go by, he was very into it too. The thick cock swelling back to full staff in Nick’s ass sure felt intense.

Wincing despite his best effort not to, Nick squirmed against the burn. Josh pulled back from the kiss and cursed, his lids dropping shut as he stiffened his arms to lift his torso from Nick’s.

“Shit, Nick, I’m sorry,” Josh said.

Nick could feel Josh trembled, his thighs and buttocks rippling with little tremors under Nick’s hands. Josh groaned, low and rough, a sound torn from his gut as he undulated. Nick squeaked as fire spread around his ring and quickly fanned up his rectum.

“This would have been easier if you hadn’t gotten me hard first,” Josh gritted out, slowly pulling his hips back.

Nick flushed with pride knowing he turned his lover on with a kiss. Being naked

probably helped, too, but until he’d taken that kiss, Josh’s cock had been soft and sated inside him.

“God,” Josh hissed, propping himself up on one hand while reaching down to grip the base of his shaft with the other. “You feel so good…”

Despite the pain, Nick’s rod started to fill, sparks of pleasure zinging from his cock to his balls. Even the slow withdrawal or the catching of the underside of Josh’s cockhead on Nick’s rim didn’t cause him to soften any.

“I just wanna shove back in and fuck you til you scream,” Josh muttered, pausing with his tip still inside.

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Nick felt a fissure of fear spreading up his spine as he struggled to speak. His body wanted more, but it also wanted the pain to stop. “Uh, I don’t think I can do that again, at least not yet,” he said with a tug on Josh’s hips.

Josh sighed shakily. “Yeah, I know, you gotta be sore.”

“I am,” Nick agreed, then bit his tongue to muffle the yelp threatening to burst free when Josh pulled his dick free. “Fuck,” Nick whimpered.

“Sorry, sorry.” Josh flopped down beside him and fumbled with the condom,

removing it. “Need to ditch this.” He tied the rubber off and tossed it in the trash can beside the bed before turning and finally looking at Nick with desire darkened eyes. He gaze flicked down the length of Nick’s body before settling on Nick’s stiff cock. Nick could
feel
that look and his cock bobbed as if begging for a touch. “You’re still hard,” Josh said with no small amount of smugness. “Hmm.”

Any smart comment Nick might have made died on his tongue when Josh trailed the

tips of his fingers down his chest. Nick’s eyes were practically glued to those long, elegant digits as they brushed over Josh’s smooth skin, lower to his ridged stomach, then further still to dance across the cap of his leaking slit.

“Too sore to fuck me?”

Nick’s startled gaze jerked up to meet Josh’s teasing one.

“I could suck you off instead.” Josh’s hand was suddenly on Nick’s length, his nimble fingers tracing over a vein. “But think about how it’d feel to slide into my hot, tight ass while you could still feel me in yours.”

“Jesus,” Nick rasped, reaching for Josh’s cock. Smooth and hot, just the feel was enough to make Nick clench his muscles against the need to come. “I want to do that.”

Josh’s lips twitched as he arched one dark brow. “Do what? What do you want to do to me? I want to hear you say it. Give me the words.”

Nick wondered if Josh was afraid he’d regret it or try to claim Josh had coerced him.

Ridiculous, he scoffed in his head. Like he could ever
not
want anything Josh would give him. It might have taken him a while, but Nick had finally gotten past his inhibitions. He’d have thought letting Josh fuck him would have proved that.

Nick rolled over, pinning Josh’s smaller frame under him. He looked down into green eyes widened by surprise. “I want you, want to be in you.”
Want to make you mine.
Need
to
make you mine.

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Josh narrowed his eyes and gripped Nick’s biceps. “Then do it,” he said in a tone that made it clear the words were a challenge.

Nick growled and dipped his head for another kiss, a brutal taking and claiming of the younger man’s mouth. Josh moaned and arched his back, pressing against Nick’s chest.

The contact against his nipples fired Nick’s blood and he ground his groin against Josh’s. It felt so good, holding Josh down with his greater weight, his fingers locked in the younger man’s dark hair, his dick driving down against Josh’s.

“Please, Nick. Need you,” Josh panted between plucking kisses.

“You’ve got me,” Nick promised, knowing Josh didn’t understand just how true the declaration was. “Let me get the stuff.”

Josh groaned and begged Nick to hurry. Nick half fell off the bed, catching himself before his knees hit the floor. Josh gave him a heated smile that had Nick hurrying despite the discomfort he experienced when he walked. He did wish he’d though to grab more than one rubber in the first place, but he hadn’t and—he peeked over his shoulder, his heart thudding like a sledgehammer in his chest at the vision Josh made, spread out, body bare of hair, one hand loosely stroking his shaft. Damn it, but he’d walk a hundred miles for that.

Once he found the condoms, and making sure to grab the box instead of a package or two, Nick came back to the bed and realised there might be a problem.

“What’s wrong?” Josh asked in a lust-slurred voice.

Nick glanced at the bed, the floor, the nightstand. “Where the hell’d the lube go?”

Snickering, Josh wiggled his hips, making that thick cock bounce. “I think I’m laying on it. Something’s stabbing my ass and it sure isn’t your dick.”

Nick scowled and gestured for Josh to roll over. “My dick’s a lot bigger than that little tube.”

“Well yeah, that was kinda my point.” Josh waggled his eyebrows but didn’t move.

“Quit glowering and come over here and get it if you want in it.”

Oh ho, the boy wanted to play? Nick was delighted and intimidated all at once. He hadn’t ever joked around with a lover before. Josh’s crooked grin widened as he slapped at his hip.

“I’ll give you a hint, it’s somewhere under here.”

Nick’s heart swelled with so much love he thought he’d burst from it. For whatever reason, this one man made him feel things no one else ever had, and Nick wouldn’t fight it.

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He’d caused them both too much pain because of his stubborn pride. Once he’d had Josh, Nick would make sure the younger man understood Nick wasn’t letting him go again. But for now…