Unfaithful Ties (36 page)

“I met someone”

“That explains why you’re in this enlivening mood”

“After I got diagnosed, I basically thought that my life was over but he’s made me realize that life goes on and that I still have something to live for.”

“That’s good Layla, I’m happy for you. Hopefully I meet someone before my hair starts turning gray. Which I doubt because the way I’m going I’ll be in a rocking chair by the time the right man comes along. And then it’ll be too late. I’m going to soak in a hot bubble bath and drink the rest of this bottle of wine in my bed while I lay there and soak in my loneliness. Good night”

“Goodnight sis.”

****

I turn on some Sade before I grab the bubble bath from underneath sink, then I carry the bubble bath over to the tub and turn on the water. I feel myself getting depressed as I watch the bubbles rise. The tub isn’t the only thing filling up with water, so are my eyes. I force the tears away and light my candles.

I need someone to love me. Someone to need me. Someone to want me and only me.

Slowly I undress
.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

After I’m done undressing I
slide into the warm water, rest my head on the back of the tub and close my eyes. For some reason all the men I’ve dated stream through my mind. I hate thinking about them. All of them. But on lonely nights like these my mind always wonders back to my past. “God are you ever going to send me a man?” I wonder and take a sip from my wine.

After thirty minutes of soaking and thinking about how lonely I am I finally decide to get out of the tub. I wrap myself in a towel and head to my bedroom.

Sade is still echoing from the stereo system as I clamber in bed. I’m going to fall asleep listening to it.

The throbbing between my legs comes back as soon as my head hits my pillow. I’ve been ignoring it for weeks now but I can’t ignore it anymore. I pull up from the bed and dash into the bathroom. I’m searching for my silver bullet like I’m an addict searching for a rock. I need it. It’s my fix.

I find it and head back to my empty bed where I don’t waste anytime pleasuring myself. I hear myself moan and moan and moan until I feel myself exploding. As I’m coming tears slide through the creases of my eyes. Doing this makes me realize just how pathetic my life actually is. I even hate that I just did it.

I’m tired of this
.

I’m tired of being alone
.

I’m tired of pleasing myself.

I turn off Sade, let my head hit the pillow and I cry like I’ve just buried my best friend.

CHAPTER 26

Malik...Jacksonville Florida

When Malik pulled the mail out of the box he had no intensions of opening any of it without relaxing first. Although he loved teaching he couldn’t deny that on most days by the time he made it home from work he was drained.  He twisted open the front door and trudged inside. Within seconds he’d slipped out of his shoes. Leaving his shoes right there on the living room floor he walked over to the coffee table and tossed the mail on top of it. He needed to eat before he bothered himself with a stack of junk mail and bills so he headed for the kitchen where he sat down at the table and enjoyed a bowl of Captain Crunch, his favorite.

Once his stomach was satisfied he went back into the living room and slouched down on the new sofa he’d purchased when he received his renters insurance check. He flipped through his mail and opened the envelope that said
Duval County District Attorney office.

Duval County

Office of the District Attorney

Lisa A. Strickland

District Attorney

FORECLUSURE ADVISORY LETTER:

Dear Homeowner:

              Public Records indicate that you have recently received a “Notice of Default” letter for late or non-payment of your mortgage. You should expect many people are going to contact you to try to convince you to sell your home to them or that they can “rescue” you from foreclosure. Often these people do not have your best interest in mind.

              It is important that you do something promptly or you may lose your home in foreclosure. You may wish to seek free real estate advice from either of the following non-profit housing counseling agencies.

Partnership Communities, Inc.

238 5
th
St.

Los Angeles, California 90012

323-439-7065

Housing Development

1429-B Boone Street

Apopka, Florida 32703

407-888-5432

If you actually sold your property or paid someone to “Rescue” you from a foreclosure, you might be a victim of a crime.  (For example, it is illegal for the foreclosure consultant to acquire an interest in your property)

If you feel that you are a victim of a crime, please call the Office of the District Attorney at 904-247-8888.

Thanks

Lisa A. Strickland

“Damn” He shouted as he headed to his bedroom so that he could log into his laptop and send Jennifer a Facebook message. She’d changed her cellular number and that was the only way he could get in contact with her. He had no clue they were in foreclosure.

He thought he was hallucinating when he walked into his bedroom and saw Regina in his bed. She was asleep, one leg poking out from underneath the sheet, her bra and panties inches away from his feet. “What in the hell are you doing in my bed?” Malik yelled. “I’m sure that you were served the restraining order papers. You can’t come within one hundred feet of my presence.”

“Baby” Regina said, yawning as she turned to her side. “You have to be a fool if you think that a little piece of paper is going to keep me away from you”

“I’m sick of these games that you’re trying to play Regina. Get the fuck out of my bed! Get the fuck out of my House! Get the fuck out of my life!”

“You don’t mean that.” She smiled. “Everything will be alright once the baby gets here.”

“What in the hell are you talking about?”

“I’m carrying our child. Having you been getting the brochures in the mail?”

She was standing on the bed.

“I’ve sent you several pamphlets. Join me, don’t you want to celebrate?” She said moving her sexy naked body in circles. “Don’t you want some more of this?”
             

“Hell no. I haven’t had a decent night of sleep since the day I met you
, now get your shit and get out”

“You don’t mean that. I know you want some of this good stuff
” She said seductively as if she hadn’t heard a word that Malik had said to her.” She was still winding and grinding her hips in a slow circular motion.

Frustration
rushed through him. He couldn’t take it. He was sick of playing her little games. He snatched her belonging from the floor, grabbed her by the hand and yanked her from the bed. “Get your shit before I call the police and have your ass arrested for breaking and entering.”

“I love you Malik”

“Love me? You hardly even know me”

“I do. I swear I do.  I love you so much it hurts. Please don’t push me away.”

“Out of everything that you’ve put me through you think that we’re going to be together! Are you insane?”

“I did those things because you’ve been treating me like I was a whore. I was upset and I didn’t know how to control it. I thought that we were in a committed relationship and then I had to find out that you ditched me for another bitch. How was I supposed to react.
”

“I never gave you a reason to believe that we were in a committed relationship. We haven’t even known each other that long! Judging from your actions you’re not someone I would even consider getting serious with.”

She looked away from Malik and stared at the wall, leaving nothing between them but silence and then she turned back to Malik, giving him a stare down. And just like that she snapped. “ Who do you think that I am? Getting rid of me is not going to be easy so you might as well get used  to me because there is a little life in my belly. And it’s yours”

“Come on you
gotta’ go. My daughter will be home soon.”

“You’re not going to introduce us”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because I’m carrying her little sister or brother that’s why”

“There is no baby and if there is I’m not the father”

“Can I at least get dressed first?”

“Hurry up before I throw you out dressed in nothing but your skin”

“I hope that you don’t think that you’re a man because you’re nothing but a coward”

“Fuck you” He pushed her out of the room, shoving her until they reached the living room.

“Fuck me? That’s what I want you to do. Fuck me good”

“Screwing you was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made in my life. You can holler you can holler you want me to fuck you to the top of your lungs and it will never happen.”

His words set her heart on fire and she landed her small fist right between his eyes. “I hate you.
You fucking arrogant ass-hole. No wonder your wife left you” She was pounding him hard, everywhere that she could.

Malik grabbed her by the arm. “How did you know that my wife left me? I never told you anything about wife”

“Let me go. You’re hurting my arms”

“How do you know that about my wife? Did Jennifer send you here to torture me?”

“Let me go. I don’t know what you’re talking about”

“Get the fuck out of here” He said
shoving her closer to the front door. “These games you’re playing are starting to get old.”

“I love you Malik”

“Get out” He screamed.

She slid into her
sundress, mooned him and stepped on the porch. “Jackass”

He slammed the door.

Regina ran across the street where her vehicle was parked, slid behind the wheel and sped off
.

****

Malik was on Google searching for information on how to save his home when his phone vibrated on the desktop. He picked up the phone and set it back down when he saw that the number was PRIVATE. He knew that it was no one but Regina so he ignored the call. He also ignored the next call, and the next one. By the time his phone quit ringing he had seventy-two missed calls along with 72 new voicemail messages
.

New Voicemail:
Do you hear that clicking sound Malik? That’s the sound that you’re going to hear when you take your last breath

New Voicemail
: Malik I’m sorry! Please pick up the phone. I love you!

New Voicemail
: I know that you probably think that I’m crazy but I’m not I’m only acting this was because I want us to be together

New Voicemail
: Uuuugggghhhh….Why won’t you answer for me?

New Voicemail
: I don’t like it when men that I’ve fucked ignore me.

New Voicemail
: If I call enough you’ll pick up the phone.

New Voicemail
: One-Two Regina’s coming for you. Three-Four don’t forget to lock your door.  Five-Six I hate I have to be like this. Seven-Eight but you made it this way.  Nine-Ten I’m going to get you in the end

CHAPTER 27

Brandi...San Antonio Texas

Brandi was sitting in her minivan watching people walk through the doors of Total Fitness. She’d been sitting there for at least thirty minutes trying to get the urge to go inside. Convincing herself to get out of the vehicle was like pulling teeth. The way she was carrying on you’d think that the double glass doors was an entrance that would lead her to Hell. Her oversized belly was an embarrassment, and she feared what others around her would think if she got her BIG behind on a treadmill. That’s about all she’d probably be able to stand. And what would walking on a treadmill do?

She didn’t know why she was there anyway, even if she walked on a treadmill for four hours a day, she believed that she’d still be hefty. She was thinking that most of the women inside were probably no bigger than a size four with nice toned arms, tight flat stomachs, and firm buns. The blonde that’d just walked out of the gym looking like she’d just left the taping of a work-out video only helped to confirm that she was right on the money. Those women and their perfect figures would only crumble her self-esteem or they would if she had any. The bottom line was if she went inside she was just going to feel more ashamed than she already felt.

And besides, she had too much going on in her life to be worrying about her weight. Christmas was right around the corner and Santa was probably going to be forced to skip her house. And to top that off she had an even bigger problem. The rent was due on the first, which was last week and she didn’t know how she was going to pay it. It wasn’t like she could just go in the backyard and pick money off of the trees. She’d applied for a janitorial company because that’s about all she knew how to do but that was a couple of months ago and they still hadn’t called her in for an interview. She prayed to God they would.

Just like that she’d convinced herself to crank up and head home. She’d just forced the gear in reverse when the man that’d pulled into the parking space beside her asked her to roll the window down. After realizing that she knew the distractingly attractive man sipping out of a water bottle standing beside her door she switched off the engine. She didn’t have any money to be wasting gas by letting the engine run. Brandi rolled down her window, propped her arm on the doorframe and cuffed her chin inside the palm of her hand.

“Hey Ms.
Hardnett, how are you?”

“I’m doing pretty good” She lied.

“Trent  hasn’t been to practice in a while, is there a reason why?”

“I just can’t afford it anymore. His dad and I separated and I had to make a few changes.”

“I sure hate that. He’s one of my best student’s. Let’s say that we just don’t worry about the expense for now.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I’m sure he misses it. Did you have a good workout?”

Brandi was thinking,
Does it look like I had a good workout
? But “No” She said. “ I didn’t go in”

“And you’re leaving?”

“Yeah, I know I shouldn’t be leaving big as I am but I don’t want everyone staring at me like I’m a visible incurable disease.”

Raymond started cackling. “Don’t worry about other people. Come on, I’ll walk in with you.”

“I don’t know...”

“Come on a little exercise is good for you.”

Brandi had never noticed how fine Raymond was until now. Probably because when she was with Trae she never noticed the looks of any man other than him. Now that Trae was no longer blocking her brainwaves she could see why all the other moms were always drooling whenever Raymond was present. This average height, brown skinned man, in the perfect shape was more than enough to drool over. Secretly Brandi was thinking, I’d loved to be held in those arms. His chest was massive and his arms looked strong, extra strong in the tight black spandex shirt that hugged his upper body causing his broad shoulders to looker even more expansive. Her eyes roamed to his abdomen,
and this find specimen even has the nerves to have a six-pack
she thought.

Brandi pulled on the handle and pushed against the door to open it but it was stuck. “This raggedy old thing” She mumbled adding a little more strength to her push. “There” She said and climbed down from the seat.

“Come on. It’s not going to be a bad experience I promise.”

With short hesitant steps she moved towards the entrance doors. “I can’t believe I’m letting you talk me into doing this. The moment I feel like everyone is looking at me I’m going to leave”

“Ms. Hardnett,” He laughed. “Don’t get yourself all worked up over nothing. Trust me, it’s not going to be as bad as you think” He pulled the handle to one of the glass doors and watched Brandi walk inside.

“I’ll be the judge of that
” She told him.

“Follow me” Raymond insisted. They walked pass Treadmills,
Ellipticals, Weight Benches, Bike Machines and several different types of fitness equipment. “The first thing we need to do is stretch”  He turned to her and said, “Stretching is important. The last thing you want to do is cramp up. If you do you’ll wish you never walked through those doors”

“I already do”

They were now in a small space with a few other people that were stretching and warming up. Raymond showed Brandi the proper techniques of stretching and they both did a few workout exercises before they headed back into the oversized room filled with fitness equipment. “Where do you want to start?” He asked.

“Let’s start with the treadmill”

And that’s where they headed.

Raymond turned on Brandi’s treadmill. “What you’re going to want to do is walk as fast as you can for at least two minutes. Make sure you walk at a pace that’s comfortable for you. Then you should jog for two minutes. Try to keep going back and forth for at least fifteen minutes.”

She stepped on,  “I’ll try” she said. Once she’d adjusted the speed on the digital control board she started walking. Raymond was right, the environment wasn’t bad at all. She pushed in the arrow that accelerated the speed and increased her pace.

Raymond turned to her. He was running on the treadmill adjacent to hers. “See it’s not that bad after all” He smiled.

She smiled too, something she’d forgotten she knew how to do. “I’m glad I took your advice and decided to come in.”

“Look at you, you should be proud of yourself.”

She increased the speed again and now she was practically running. “It’s feels good to”

About ten minutes into her run things started to get blurry, everyone and everything started to look like a great big puff of fog.

Brandi staggered down to the track of the treadmill.

“Can you hear me?” She heard people asking her as she came too.  Her vision was still unclear and she was so weak. She wondered why all these people were surrounding her as if she was a celebrity? And why’d look like everyone there had an identical twin?

“Thank God you’re okay” She heard Raymond say.

She was trying to get up.

“No...no, you need to lie down. You were out for about five minutes. The paramedics are on the way.” A white man who she assumed was the manager said.

“I’m fine” Brandi insisted, trying to get from the floor. “A little embarrassed but I’m fine.” It seemed that everyone in the gym had formed a huddle around her and had focused all of their attention on her, the fat woman that had fainted in the gym.

“Ms. Hardnett I think that you need to listen to the manager. It’s not a good idea for you to drive.”

“I said I’m fine” She said, finally able to pull herself up. “So just mind your own business and move out of my way.” She forced her way out of the huddle and headed for the door. She felt weak and nauseous but did her best not to show it. Harold and the manager were following closely behind her. “Mam. I can’t let you leave knowing that you fainted in here. It’s our Company’s policy.” The man explained.

She’d reached the entrance of the gym and was standing in front of the two doors when she saw two paramedics jump out of an ambulance truck. “For the fifth time I’m fine.” She yelled to the manager. “So screw you and your company’s policy”

“He just wants to be sure that you’re alright Ms.
Hardnett” Raymond explained. “There is no harm in that. Something could seriously be wrong”

“I can’t go to the hospital. I have to pick up Trent from daycare and I have to be home when the twins get there from school.”

“Ms. Hardnett. I’ll do all of that for you. If you’ll call the program director of the daycare he attends and let them know that Raymond Flinch is coming to pick up your son. I’ll be happy to do it. And I have no problem stopping by to get the twins. But you need to go to the hospital.”

Brandi calmed down and decided to take Raymond’s advice and left with the paramedics.

****

The hospital was uncomfortably cold and Brandi was sitting in an even more uncomfortable chair that clearly wasn’t designed for
heavyset people, answering questions being asked by an LPN. She’d grown impatient and was really working on the nurse’s nerves. The poor woman had lost count of how many times Brandi had insisted that she was fine and that fainting was no big deal. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe there is nothing wrong. But we have to run a few tests to be sure” the nurse said wrapping the blood pressure cuff around Brandi’s arm.

While the cuff tightened, Brandi wondered who’d take care of her kids if something
was wrong? She couldn’t depend on Trae and she wouldn’t dare leave them home alone over night.

“Your blood pressure is very low.” The nurse said taking off the pressure cuff. “Follow me” The woman led them to a private room.
and assisted Brandi inside. Then she moved across the room, grabbed a gown out of the cabinet and handed it to Brandi. “You’re going to need to change” She said. “ If you go back out into the hallway the restroom will be the second door to your left. The doctor will be in here to see you shortly” and she headed to her next destination.

****

Hours later, Brandi was restless. After all of the diagnostic test, why wouldn’t she be? Her cholesterol level was high, her blood pressure was low and during her breast exam she learned that she had a lump.

She sat close to the edge of the gurney; posture slightly slumped as she looked towards the knock coming from the other end of the door.

Raymond slipped between the crack. “The nurse said you wanted to see me. Is everything okay?”

Brandi stared at her hands before using them to wipe away her tears. “You were right
” She said in a flat monotone voice. “There is something going on with me”

“It’s not anything serious is it? They can fix it right?”

“They found a lump in my breast”

Raymond had a difficult time forming a response because he didn’t know what to say. A thick lump settled in his throat. “Ms.
Hardnett, I’m-…I’m so sorry! I don’t…I don’t know-”

“You don’t know what to say. It’s okay
” She said finally looking at him. “I don’t know what to tell myself. I don’t even know how to convince myself that everything is going to be alright.”

“Do they think that it’s cancerous?”

“They don’t know”

“Well don’t claim it. It may not even be anything serious.”

“With my luck I’d be lucky if it’s not in an aggressive stage by now.”

“Don’t say that
” Raymond said sitting down beside Brandi. “Is there anything that I can do. I mean I know you hardly know me and everything but I want to help you in any way that I can. That is, if that’s okay with you.”

“You’ve done more than enough and you don’t have to hang around. I’m sure that you have a family that’s wondering where you’ve been all day.”

“I don’t have a family and there isn’t anywhere that I’d rather be than right here. Right now is when you need someone the most. Is there anything that I can go and get you? Anything you want? Water? Soda?”

“The one thing that I want no one is going to be able to give me.”

“What’s that?”

“
A fresh start. A chance to reverse the decisions I made in my life. And more time” Brandi let out an uncontrollable sob, dropping her head into her hands. “I want more time with my kids. A second chance to be the mother that they deserve” She said looking back up at Raymond. “More time to make up for my mistakes. And mistakes that I allowed their father to make.” She cried. “The twins will be graduating high school next year. And Trent, he’s still so young. They need their mother. My children need me. I just want more time to be with them. Have you ever felt like you was falling, and even a parachute couldn’t save you? That’s exactly how I feel.”

“Mrs.
Hardnett, do you believe in God?”

“Yes”

“There is power behind that name and I’m a firm believer that God will have the final say in how much time you have left. He’s the only person that can save you from drowning.”

“I’m probably the last person he’ll want to give more time. I haven’t exactly done right by him lately.”

“Ms. Hardnett God doesn’t hold grudges.” Raymond explained. “If that were the case no one would go to heaven. We’ve all done something that wasn’t right in God’s eyes.”