Read Trouble Is My Business Online
Authors: Raymond Chandler
The car came on, the lights swaying. “Damn drunk,” George swore over his shoulder.
It could be. Drunks in cars go all kinds of places to drink. It could be. I slid down onto the floor of the car and yanked the Luger from under my arm and reached up to open the catch. I opened the door a little and held it that way, looking over the sill. The headlights hit me in the face and I ducked, then came up again as the beam passed.
The other car jammed to a stop. Its door slammed open and a figure jumped out of it, waving a gun and shouting. I heard the voice and knew.
“Reach, you bastards!” Frisky screamed at us.
George put his left hand on the wheel and I opened my door a little more. The little man in the street was bouncing up and down and yelling. Out of the small dark car from which he had jumped came no sound except the noise of its motor.
“This is a heist!” Frisky yelled. “Out of there and line up, you sons of bitches!”
I kicked my door open and started to get out, the Luger down at my side.
“You asked for it!” the little man yelled.
I dropped—fast. The gun in his hand belched flame. Somebody must have put a firing pin in it. Glass smashed behind my head. Out of the corner of my eye, which oughtn’t to have had any corners at that particular moment, I saw George make a movement as smooth as a ripple of water. I brought the Luger up and started to squeeze the trigger, but a shot crashed beside me—George.
I held my fire. It wasn’t needed now.
The dark car lurched forward and started down the hill furiously. It roared into the distance while the little man out in the middle of the pavement was still reeling grotesquely in the light reflected from the walls.
There was something dark on his face that spread. His gun bounded along the concrete. His little legs buckled and he plunged sideways and rolled and then, very suddenly, became still.
George said, “Yah!” and sniffed at the muzzle of his revolver.
“Nice shooting.” I got out of the car, stood there looking at the little man—a crumpled nothing. The dirty white of his sneakers gleamed a little in the side glare of the car’s lights.
George got out beside me. “Why me, brother?”
“I didn’t fire. I was watching that pretty hip draw of yours. It was sweeter than honey.”
“Thanks, pal. They were after Mister Gerald, of course. I usually ferry him home from the club about this time, full of liquor and bridge losses.”
We went over to the little man and looked down at him. He wasn’t anything to see. He was just a little man who was dead, with a big slug in his face and blood on him.
“Turn some of those damn lights off,” I growled. “And let’s get away from here fast.”
“The house is just across the street.” George sounded as casual as if he had just shot a nickel in a slot machine instead of a man.
“The Jeeters are out of this, if you like your job. You ought to know that. We’ll go back to my place and start all over.”
“I get it,” he snapped, and jumped back into the big car. He cut the foglights and the sidelights and I got in beside him in the front seat.
We straightened out and started up the hill, over the brow. I looked back at the broken window. It was the small one at the extreme back of the car and it wasn’t shatterproof. A large piece was gone from it. They could fit that, if they got around to it, and make some evidence. I didn’t think it would matter, but it might.
At the crest of the hill a large limousine passed us going down. Its dome light was on and in the interior, as in a lighted showcase, an elderly couple sat stiffly, taking the royal salute. The man was in evening clothes, with a white scarf and a crush hat. The woman was in furs and diamonds.
George passed them casually, gunned the car and we made a fast right turn into a dark street. “There’s a couple of good dinners all shot to hell,” he drawled, “and I bet they don’t even report it.”
“Yeah. Let’s get back home and have a drink,” I said. “I never really got to like killing people.”
FIVE
We sat with some of Miss Harriet Huntress’ Scotch in our glasses and looked at each other across the rims. George looked nice with his cap off. His head was clustered over with wavy dark-brown hair and his teeth were very white and clean. He sipped his drink and nibbled a cigarette at the same time. His snappy black eyes had a cool glitter in them.
“Yale?” I asked.
“Dartmouth, if it’s any of your business.”
“Everything’s my business. What’s a college education worth these days?”
“Three squares and a uniform,” he drawled.
“What kind of guy is young Jeeter?”
“Big blond bruiser, plays a fair game of golf, thinks he’s hell with the women, drinks heavy but hasn’t sicked up on the rugs so far.”
“What kind of guy is old Jeeter?”
“He’d probably give you a dime—if he didn’t have a nickel with him.”
“Tsk, tsk, you’re talking about your boss.”
George grinned. “He’s so tight his head squeaks when he takes his hat off. I always took chances. Maybe that’s why I’m just somebody’s driver. This is good Scotch.”
I made another drink, which finished the bottle. I sat down again.
“You think those two gunnies were stashed out for Mister Gerald?”
“Why not? I usually drive him home about that time. Didn’t today. He had a bad hangover and didn’t go out until late. You’re a dick, you know what it’s all about, don’t you?”
“Who told you I was a dick?”
“Nobody but a dick ever asked so goddam many questions.”
I shook my head. “Uh-uh. I’ve asked you just six questions. Your boss has a lot of confidence in you. He must have told you.”
The dark man nodded, grinned faintly and sipped. “The whole set-up is pretty obvious,” he said. “When the car started to swing for the turn into the driveway these boys went to work. I don’t figure they meant to kill anybody, somehow. It was just a scare. Only that little guy was nuts.”
I looked at George’s eyebrows. They were nice black eyebrows, with a gloss on them like horsehair.
“It doesn’t sound like Marty Estel to pick that sort of helpers.”
“Sure. Maybe that’s why he picked that sort of helpers.”
“You’re smart. You and I can get along. But shooting that little punk makes it tougher. What will you do about that?”
“Nothing.”
“O.K. If they get to you and tie it to your gun, if you still have the gun, which you probably won’t, I suppose it will be passed off as an attempted stick-up. There’s just one thing.”
“What?” George finished his second drink, laid the glass aside, lit a fresh cigarette and smiled.
“It’s pretty hard to tell a car from in front—at night. Even with all those lights. It might have been a visitor.”
He shrugged and nodded. “But if it’s a scare, that would do just as well. Because the family would hear about it and the old man would guess whose boys they were—and why.”
“Hell, you really are smart,” I said admiringly, and the phone rang.
It was an English-butler voice, very clipped and precise, and it said that if I was Mr. Philip Marlowe, Mr. Jeeter would like to speak to me. He came on at once, with plenty of frost.
“I must say that you take your time about obeying orders,” he barked. “Or hasn’t that chauffeur of mine—”
“Yeah, he got here, Mr. Jeeter,” I said. “But we ran into a little trouble. George will tell you.”
“Young man, when I want something done—”
“Listen, Mr. Jeeter, I’ve had a hard day. Your son punched me on the jaw and I fell and cut my head open. When I staggered back to my apartment, more dead than alive, I was stuck up by a couple of hard guys with guns who told me to lay off the Jeeter case. I’m doing my best but I’m feeling a little frail, so don’t scare me.”
“Young man—”
“Listen,” I told him earnestly, “if you want to call all the plays in this game, you can carry the ball yourself. Or you can save yourself a lot of money and hire an order taker. I have to do things my way. Any cops visit you tonight?”
“Cops?” he echoed in a sour voice. “You mean policemen?”
“By all means—I mean policemen.”
“And why should I see any policemen?” he almost snarled.
“There was a stiff in front of your gates half an hour ago. Stiff meaning dead man. He’s quite small. You could sweep him up in a dustpan, if he bothers you.”
“My God! Are you serious?”
“Yes. What’s more he took a shot at George and me. He recognized the car. He must have been all set for your son, Mr. Jeeter.”
A silence with barbs on it. “I thought you said a dead man,” Mr. Jeeter’s voice said very coldly. “Now you say he shot at you.”
“That was while he wasn’t dead,” I said. “George will tell you. George—”
“You come out here at once!” he yelled at me over the phone. “At once, do you hear? At once!”
“George will tell you,” I said softly and hung up.
George looked at me coldly. He stood up and put his cap on. “O.K., pal,” he said. “Maybe some day I can put you on to a soft thing.” He started for the door.
“It had to be that way. It’s up to him. He’ll have to decide.”
“Nuts,” George said, looking back over his shoulder. “Save your breath, shamus. Anything you say to me is just so much noise in the wrong place.”
He opened the door, went out, shut it, and I sat there still holding the telephone, with my mouth open and nothing in it but my tongue and a bad taste on that.
I went out to the kitchen and shook the Scotch bottle, but it was still empty. I opened some rye and swallowed a drink and it tasted sour. Something was bothering me. I had a feeling it was going to bother me a lot more before I was through.
They must have missed George by a whisker. I heard the elevator come up again almost as soon as it had stopped going down. Solid steps grew louder along the hallway. A fist hit the door. I went over and opened it.
One was in brown, one in blue, both large, hefty and bored.
The one in brown pushed his hat back on his head with a freckled hand and said: “You Philip Marlowe?”
“Me,” I said.
They rode me back into the room without seeming to. The one in blue shut the door. The one in brown palmed a shield and let me catch a glint of the gold and enamel.
“Finlayson, Detective Lieutenant working out of Central Homicide,” he said. “This is Sebold, my partner. We’re a couple of swell guys not to get funny with. We hear you’re kind of sharp with a gun.”
Sebold took his hat off and dusted his salt-and-pepper hair back with the flat of his hand. He drifted noiselessly out to the kitchen.
Finlayson sat down on the edge of a chair and flicked his chin with a thumbnail as square as an ice cube and yellow as a mustard plaster. He was older than Sebold, but not so good-looking. He had the frowsy expression of a veteran cop who hadn’t got very far.
I sat down. I said: “How do you mean, sharp with a gun?”
“Shooting people is how I mean.”
I lit a cigarette. Sebold came out of the kitchen and went into the dressing room behind the wall bed.
“We understand you’re a private-license guy,” Finlayson said heavily.
“That’s right.”
“Give.” He held his hand out. I gave him my wallet. He chewed it over and handed it back. “Carry a gun?”
I nodded. He held out his hand for it. Sebold came out of the dressing room. Finlayson sniffed at the Luger, snapped the magazine out, cleared the breech and held the gun so that a little light shone up through the magazine opening into the breech end of the barrel. He looked down the muzzle, squinting. He handed the gun to Sebold. Sebold did the same thing.
“Don’t think so,” Sebold said. “Clean, but not that clean. Couldn’t have been cleaned within the hour. A little dust.”
“Right.”
Finlayson picked the ejected shell off the carpet, pressed it into the magazine and snapped the magazine back in place. He handed me the gun. I put it back under my arm.
“Been out anywhere tonight?” he asked tersely.
“Don’t tell me the plot,” I said. “I’m just a bit-player.”
“Smart guy,” Sebold said dispassionately. He dusted his hair again and opened a desk drawer. “Funny stuff. Good for a column. I like ’em that way—with my blackjack.”
Finlayson sighed. “Been out tonight, shamus?”
“Sure. In and out all the time. Why?”
He ignored the question. “Where you been?”
“Out to dinner. Business call or two.”
“Where at?”
“I’m sorry, boys. Every business has its private files.”
“Had company, too,” Sebold said, picking up George’s glass and sniffing it. “Recent—within the hour.”
“You’re not that good,” I told him sourly.
“Had a ride in a big Caddy?” Finlayson bored on, taking a deep breath. “Over West L. A. direction?”
“Had a ride in a Chrysler–over Vine Street direction.”
“Maybe we better just take him down,” Sebold said, looking at his fingernails.
“Maybe you better skip the gang-buster stuff and tell me what’s stuck in your nose. I get along with cops—except when they act as if the law is only for citizens.”
Finlayson studied me. Nothing I had said made an impression on him. Nothing Sebold said made any impression on him. He had an idea and he was holding it like a sick baby.
“You know a little rat named Frisky Lavon?” he sighed. “Used to be a dummy-chucker, then found out he could bug his way outa raps. Been doing that for say twelve years. Totes a gun and acts simple. But he quit acting tonight at seven-thirty about. Quit cold—with a slug in his head.”
“Never heard of him,” I said.
“You bumped anybody off tonight?”
“I’d have to look at my notebook.”
Sebold leaned forward politely. “Would you care for a smack in the kisser?” he inquired.
Finlayson held his hand out sharply. “Cut it, Ben. Cut it. Listen, Marlowe. Maybe we’re going at this wrong. We’re not talking about murder. Could have been legitimate. This Frisky Lavon got froze off tonight on Calvello Drive in Bel-Air. Out in the middle of the street. Nobody seen or heard anything. So we kind of want to know.”
“All right,” I growled. “What makes it my business? And keep that piano tuner out of my hair. He has a nice suit and his nails are clean, but he bears down on his shield too hard.”