Transference (9 page)

The burned spy was a protective little bitch. Eli had clearly traded up.

So had Allison.

All through dinner, Adam kept touching her – on the shoulder, her hand, her arm. He brushed hair from her face so often that Brad wanted to throw a rubber band at them so she could tie it back. And then he kept pressing these little kisses on her shoulder and whispering in her ear. Sickening, the whole display.
 

At least now he was alone in his room for the night. Except, he could hear every creaking floorboard as the others moved throughout the large house. If he could hear footsteps then he'd bet he could also hear squeaky mattresses and moans. Of all things, that was not something he cared to hear tonight.
 

As he counted his money for the second time that night, he smiled at the knowledge that the government that'd fired him and put him on a hitlist had basically just paid him for his trouble. Of all the stupid things his people had done during that miserable failure of an op, not leaving the money adequately protected while they searched for the brothers had been perhaps the most unforgivable. Not only had they failed to catch them, but they'd also allowed Eli and Adam to break into their facility and waltz out with their entire stash of counterfeit bills.

After thumbing through enough of the bills to be sure, Brad was convinced that none of the serial numbers he checked started the way his bills had. With no honor among thieves, he hadn't expected that Eli was serious when he insisted that they'd already laundered the stash. Knowing he would be leaving with clean bills meant this job would bankroll more of his next mission than he realized.

And what a mission it would be. Brad may have bungled things the last time he'd seen Stafford, but she wasn't so well protected that he couldn't get to her. He'd just have to wait until she traveled abroad. That's how he'd take the bitch down. He couldn't wait.

But really, he just wanted out of Costa Rica. He needed to put a country or an ocean between him and Allison.

* * *

His eyes had been on her all through dinner despite the fact that he was never looking at her. Allison knew him well enough by now to know he could watch an entire room while reading a book if he so chose. At least everyone else was oblivious to her discomfort with the situation. No one would ever begin to guess at what all had gone on between them. For that, she was grateful.

And her desire for discretion had nothing to do with regret or shame. Right or wrong, she'd fallen in love with him. That was something with which she could live. She was a big girl and was capable of living with the consequences of her actions. It was Adam's reaction that concerned her. He didn't deserve to be hurt – and he would be – if he found out.

Adam came up behind her on the porch and slid his arms around her waist. She leaned back into him as he gave her another soft kiss on the shoulder. "I'm just going to grab a pillow and blanket off the bed and then the bedroom is all yours."

Allison blinked back her surprise. "Where will you be?"

"I thought I might crash on the floor in EJ's room tonight. Or maybe the couch."

She turned to him slowly. "You don't have to do that, Adam."

"Allison..." He took her hands in his, stroking the top of her knuckles with his thumb. "I don't have any expectations...of you...about tonight." His voice was low. "I don't know what it's been like for you since that day you got caught and there was nothing we could do short of executing a cop to..."

"Adam."

"Please let me finish." His eyes searched her face and she nodded for him to continue. "I don't know how things were for you, but I know that not a day has gone by that I haven't thought of you, how to get to you, how things could be for us." He averted his gaze. "So, it would be fair to say that I might have built this – us – up in my head more than I should have. I know it's not right for me to put any of that off on you." Adam paused for a long moment before finally meeting her eyes. "I don't want you to feel like you have to hop into bed with—"

Allison cut off his words with an impulsive kiss. Against his lips she murmured, "If I hop into bed with you, can you just hold me?"

"I can do that." He framed her face with his hands and brushed her lips with a kiss. "I can definitely do that."

* * *

Brad stared at the ceiling in the dark. Sleep simply would not come. Every sound in the house echoed through his brain. EJ's stereo was playing some noise that was supposed to pass for music. Of course, that was less irritating than the muffled groans coming from the shower. He supposed Eli and Jane thought they were being subtle by using the running water to mask the sounds of what they were doing, but since his headboard shared a wall with the bathroom, Brad might as well have pulled up a chair in the bathroom to watch because he could already hear everything.

Everything
.

About the time Jane began to very graphically tell Eli how she wanted him to do something, Brad fled the bed and moved to the window. That was a mistake. The display from dinner had just moved outside. It didn't matter where he went in the house, he couldn't get away from the fact that he was more alone now than he had been only a few weeks ago.

It was time to go. It was time to go now. Waiting until the morning wasn't an option. Waiting for Allison and Adam to come inside and go into their room and...

It just wasn't an option.

There was a soft knock on his door. Allison looked nervous when he opened it. "Wrong room, princess."

"No...I know that...I just..." Her eyes glistened. "Goodnight, Brad."

"Night." He closed the door in her face before she could say anything else. He didn't do the whole sappy goodbye thing. Never had, never would.

Once he heard a door close on the far side of the hallway, Brad gathered his things – including the duffel containing his payment – and left the house. There was no reason to delay leaving until the morning. He'd hiked farther in worse conditions with heavier gear in the past. Finding a place to stay in Costa Rica should be a piece of cake, comparatively speaking.

Loud footfalls on crunching gravel stopped him in his tracks. He turned slowly. "You should be inside. Why are you following me?"

Allison took a moment to catch her breath. "You're leaving? Just like that, without saying goodbye...you're leaving?"

"Yeah. I thought it was best."

"Are you in that much of a hurry to get away from me?"

"Yes."

She flinched as though slapped. "How do you do that, Brad? How do you just switch it off and on like that? Don't you care even a little that this is it?"

He dropped his bags on the ground and grabbed her by the shoulders, pulling her farther into the shadows surrounding them. "What the fuck do you want from me, Allison?"

"Honesty. After every lie you've told me since we met, I think I deserve that much."

Brad loosened his grip on her. He let out a long, shaky breath before he spoke. "I'm the one who rigged the boat. I killed your father."

"I already assumed as much. You got the kill order and you executed it." She shook her head, eyes sad. "But you know that's not the honesty I'm asking for."

He almost couldn't get the words out of his mouth. "It's
killing
me to see you with him. I have to go, Allison. I have to get out of here before I mess this up for you."

"I could go with you."

His arms fell limp by his side and he gaped at her in stunned silence. Shaking himself out of it, he said, "You can't." Before she could protest, he added, "You don't understand what that would mean. I now have to live my life on the run, place to place, taking risks and dangerous jobs as I come by them."

"And having a bag full of money doesn't change that at all? Really?"

"I wish it did." He searched her face, desperate for the words to make her understand. "Stafford doesn't just forget about loose ends or decide she doesn't have to worry about them. I don't have the luxury of picking a place to live and staying there, making any sort of a life. They'll hunt me. I'll kill them or they'll kill me...or you, if you're with me."

"I think we've already established that we make a good team when they come after us."

They really did. "Getting killed on US soil is very different from getting killed in a foreign country. You'll never know if the man who sold you an apple on the corner poisoned it. You'll never..." He nearly told her about the threat Eli Barrows posed for them, but thought better of it. "You'll never truly be safe or have a solid night's sleep. That's no way for you to live. You deserve better than that. You deserve stability I can't give you." He gave her a long look. "Adam Barrows can."

"Brad..." Allison's eyes welled with tears and they began to spill over her cheek. "Don't go yet."

"I don't want to." He gathered her into his arms, holding her against his chest while she stopped holding back the sobs. "I have to."

When the tears had subsided, she pulled away and wiped any trace from her eyes before looking at him. "There's something I have to tell you before you leave."

"Okay."

She licked her lips nervously. "I, uh...I don't know anything for sure yet and I might be wrong, but..." Allison let out a shuddering breath. "I think I'm pregnant."

Brad didn't say anything for a long time. The normal responses a man had to hearing those words didn't apply in this situation. He wasn't allowed to be happy because she wasn't his. He couldn't ask the stock question of how this sort of thing happened either. Brad wasn't stupid; he knew precisely how it happened. Never once had they used protection.

He reached out to stroke her cheek. "I'm so sorry, Allison."

"It's my fault too."

"I still should have thought..." He pulled his hand away. "You know this doesn't change anything."

That was a lie. It changed everything. Where he might've considered grabbing her hand and running off with her, playing God with her life by doing so, he'd never put their child in the crosshairs.

"I know."

Brad cleared his throat to break the silence that fell over them. "So, are you going to tell Barrows it's his?"

"Oh, uh..." Allison looked at the ground and fiddled with the hem of her shirt. "Adam and I...we, uh...we haven't exactly...done that...yet."

He tried to appear unaffected by the news. "You should probably do something about that then."

When she didn't respond – and really, how could she? – Brad pulled her to him one last time, kissing her with all of the passion he might never be able to let out again. Why was it so hard to walk away from her? This was just supposed to be a simple delivery.

Resting his forehead against hers, he said, "I have to go or I won't be able to."

Tears invaded her voice. "Then don't. You don't always have to do the right thing, Brad."

Never in his life had he been as tempted to toss out what he knew to be right as he was at that moment. Leaving her was difficult enough, but if she was carrying his baby...he could no more walk away from his child than he could provide a life of security for Allison, for a family.

And if Eli's hired goons caught up with them before the government did, his child wouldn't stand a chance.

It wasn't fair. Regardless of how the affair began, there was love there now. He could see that much in her eyes when she looked at him; he could feel that much in his heart when he allowed himself to acknowledge it. Didn't he deserve to be happy, too? Hadn't he done his penance for all of his past indiscretions? Wasn't the slate finally clean?

This was a defining moment. Leaving Allison and his child with a man who could give them all of the love and happiness and security they deserved would be his redemption.

And it was the darkest moment of his life.

He pulled away from her, his face all business. "I need to get going and you should get back before you're missed."

Allison nodded and kept her gaze loosely fixed on him while he picked up his bags, slinging one over his shoulder. "Markenson, I, uh...I don't hate you."

She was a good woman for not saying what she actually meant. He never could have turned and left if she had. "I don't hate you either, Waverly." Holding her gaze for one more fleeting instant, he turned and started off into his own private hell.

CHAPTER 13

ELI DRAINED HIS water glass and set it down in the sink, trying not to think about what might be going on outside. Assigning Jane to get EJ and Markenson to extract Allison had been a poor decision on his part. No matter what line of bullshit Allison tried to sell, Markenson had clearly done a lot more than just his job.

They may've thought they were real slick at dinner, but Eli had noticed every strained glance, every moment of awkward tension simmering between them when conversation lagged. He'd banged enough chicks he wasn't supposed to in his day to see all the signs in front of him. His hired gun had crossed a line and was skipping out in the middle of the night before Eli could do anything about it.

Probably just as well. Adam wouldn't like seeing the side of him that took care of business when he had to. Besides, Markenson had some kind of a bug up his ass about killing the vice president.

Letting him take care of that part of things would save them a few bucks.

Jane's arms circled his waist and she nipped playfully at his muscular back. "Are you coming to bed or what?"

He tried not to let it bother him that he hadn't heard a single footfall on the creaky floors during her approach. "Someone's demanding."

"Don't think I'm done with you yet. After weeks of dirty talk on the phone, you're gonna have to put your money where your mouth is, Barrows."

He took one last look at the lone figure approaching the house. His little brother was in for a world of heartache with this one, but Allison was Adam's choice. Eli would have to respect that.

He pushed the image of Markenson pulling Allison into the shadows out of his mind and turned to Jane. "Put my money where my mouth is, huh? Maybe I have a few ideas about where I want to put my mouth."

Jane gave him a quirky smile, smacked him on the ass and then took off in the direction of the bedroom, clearly not caring about whether anyone heard her footsteps.