Three Cans of Soup (12 page)

“I don’t believe it!” he would exclaim looking out the window of the old Plymouth his gaze turned toward the dark night.

“What is it?” Bill’s mother would exclaim, usually awakening Bill’s sisters.

“Do you see that, over there, in the sky,” Bill’s father would say.

His mother Joyce would look and then exclaim, “Oh, Honey, I see it, that red dot moving across the sky.”

Bill and his sisters would be straining to see.

Milt would then say, “I think its Santa. I don’t think he has gotten to our house yet!”

“Well, honey,” his mother would say, “step on it. We need to get home and get these kids asleep so he doesn’t miss us.” For some reason Bill never had trouble going to sleep even after he had discovered the secret of Santa.

Then on Christmas Day, they would all awaken to find the cookies and milk left for Santa gone, eaten by the mysterious visitor. New presents would have appeared around the Christmas tree. After the ritual of tearing open the gifts, Milt and Joyce would set about preparing the turkey and dressing.

During college the family tradition continued even though his Grandmother Thompson died during his third year of college. They had grown too old for the “Look at that red light in the sky” trick, but Bill cherished and looked forward to the family gathering every year.

Thus when Bill got news that the family had all gone together to get him an airline ticket to return home for Christmas, he was overjoyed. Paul and Lynn had invited him to go with them back to Lynn’s folks in Montana rather than be alone. David and his new girlfriend Cheryl had also invited him to her home in Dallas for Christmas. Chris and his girlfriend had extended him an invitation but Bill would have rather eaten another of Mabel’s cakes than accept that one. So when the ticket came in the mail and Bill climbed aboard the airplane bound for Portland and then Eugene, he knew it would be a good Christmas after all.

When Bill arrived in Eugene it was raining. It was quite a contrast from the 70-degree weather he had left in Fort Worth. His dad, mom, and sisters were waiting for him. Julie, the older of the sisters, was in college at the University of Oregon. She was majoring in art and from her dress was also majoring in being a counter-culture person known as a “hippie”. Nicole was much younger than Bill and was just entering junior high school. Both his sisters seemed to have grown leagues since last seeing them a few months ago. After the hellos, hugs, and kisses, Julie motioned to Bill to step aside.

In almost a whisper she said to Bill, “We have to talk. After you get settled why don’t you suggest that you and I go out for coffee?” That was all she said, for by that time, Bill’s dad Milt was gathering up the bags and leading the way to the car.

“You have got to see my—OUR—new car. We just got a brand new Buick with a V8, air conditioning, everything! I’ve always wanted a car like this,” Bill’s dad said with great pride.

“Air conditioning? In Oregon?,” Bill said, hustling to keep up with his father. “Your mother said the same thing, but I say what the hell!”

There in front of them sat a beautiful Buick with a white top. Ever since Uncle Red had gotten his Buick, Bill’s dad had wanted one worse than ever. It was a beautiful car. The rain was beading up on the sparkling shine.

“Will we have room?” Joyce asked as they caught up to Bill and Milt

“No problem,” Milt said as he opened the huge trunk. Bill’s suitcase and carry-on looked lost in the huge trunk. “We can always put Nicole in the trunk.”

Nicole did not appreciate the joke and gave a disapproving glance. After some maneuvering they all piled into the Buick. Bill’s dad seemed to relish every moment and spent the first few minutes explaining every detail to Bill. Then he started up the engine and eased the automatic into drive and left the Eugene airport, turning onto the highway and headed for home.

Arriving at their ranch-style home, Bill felt suddenly safe and secure again. When the family first moved in when Bill was in high school, the house occupied the last street in the sub-division. They had a wonderful view of the hills. In only a few years’ time, new streets were laid out and new homes were built. Now the view from the backyard was of fences and the roofs of a seemingly endless number of homes. In spite of the lack of view, for Bill, he was home.

“You have your old room,” Milt said as he hauled in the suitcase and small carry-on.

“No, I don’t expect Julie to give up her room,” Bill said as he followed his dad into the house.

“No problem,” Julie said with a smile. “I am staying over with friends for the holidays.”

“I just don’t know what to do with her,” Bill’s mother said, throwing up her hands. “Look at her! She is worse than you ever were. The beads, the long hair, and her boyfriend look exactly the same and he drives around in that damn VW van. The sixties are gone, the seventies are gone. I wish your sister would realize that.” Julie said nothing. Bill thought that this had been a recurring conversation. Bill actually had to admit that his sister had really grown up in the few months he had been gone. He was secretly cheering her on.

“Say, Julie,” Bill said as they entered the house and deposited the baggage. “How about you and I take a break and go for a soda or cup of coffee? You can tell me all about school and about this new boyfriend of yours.”

“Love to,” Julie replied, putting her coat on again. “We can take my car.”

“What?” Bill’s mother said, and gave Bill one of her looks. “You just got in; don’t you want something to eat?”

“There will be plenty of time for that later. If you all don’t mind, I’d like to see the old campus again, just for old time’s sake. What time is dinner?”

“Same as always: six o’clock,” his mother said. Then she did something strange. She looked at Joyce and said, “Yes, I actually think you two should talk. Just don’t be late.” His mother kissed Bill lightly on the cheek just as Milt was reentering the room with two beers.

“Julie and Bill are going out for a while,” Joyce said turning toward Milt.

Milt with a surprised look on his face said, “What? He just got in. Don’t you have time for a beer?”

“Julie has to get to her friend’s house. Why don’t we have that beer after dinner, Dad?” Bill said, moving toward the door with Julie in the lead. They climbed into her small Toyota and drove off toward campus. They stopped at a familiar coffee-house near the campus. They ordered espressos and after some small talk, Bill finally said, “What was that look you gave me at the airport? Is everything all right?”

Julie looked first down at her cup, then around the room. Tears began to form in her eyes, “No, things are not all right. You need to know,” she said, obviously having difficulty forming the words. “Dad has cancer.”

The words hung in the air. They seemed unreal, as if a stranger had said them. Bill sat in silence, as did Julie. “What did you say?” Bill knew he had heard correctly.

“Cancer, Dad has cancer,” Julie said quietly so that no one could overhear. “About a month ago Dad went to the doctor about a lump in his breast. They told him it was cancer. He did not want to tell you because he was afraid it would spoil our Christmas. You know Dad, just ignore everything and it will be okay.”

Bill sat in silence for a few more moments. “Is he going to be okay?”

“We don’t know. They’ve scheduled surgery after Christmas. They should have done it before but he didn’t want to ruin Christmas.”

It was as though something finally clicked in Bill’s mind. “What a minute. Did you say he has breast cancer? That is something that hits women, not men. They must be wrong.”

“Bill,” Julie said taking his hand and looking deeply into his eye. “Dad has cancer, breast cancer. We thought the same thing, but the doctor said it happens. It is very, very rare in men. The doctor also said that the treatments that usually work on women don’t work on men, something to do with hormones and such. But the first step is surgery, then radiation, and then chemo.”

“Why didn’t Dad or Mom say something?”

“Mom wanted me to tell you. I think Dad also wanted me to tell you, although he acts like he wants to keep it all to himself.”

“What about Nicole,” Bill said his voice quivering?

“Well, Mom has not told her anything yet except Dad is sick and has to have an operation after Christmas. I think she should tell her the truth and I plan to do so later, but not now.”

Suddenly Bill felt anger. He could not determine why or where it was coming from, but he was suddenly angry. “Why didn’t anyone tell me?”

“Bill, I told Mom they should have written you or called you when the doctor told us. But Dad insisted that it was no big deal and to not bother you. There was nothing that could be done and he thinks after the surgery it will all be okay.”

Bill just glared at Julie for a moment, then his emotions changed again and he sat swirling his espresso. “Sorry I took it out on you. It is not your fault. Cancer,” Bill said, repeating the word again and again. They talked for a while longer and then got up to leave.

“How are you doing?” Bill asked as they were leaving the shop and nearing her car. It was raining again, a light rain that was so common in western Oregon.

“I’m okay,” Julie replied as she unlocked Bill’s side of the car and rushed around to her side.

As they settled into the car Bill asked, “And this boyfriend of yours?”

“Oh, Jason. I really like Jason and I think he really likes me. We have a lot in common. Dad doesn’t like him because he looks like a hippie, and you know how Dad is about hippies. I am surprised you survived your college with your demonstrations and long hair and all.”

“Barely,” Bill said as they began the drive home.

“No, I’m in love with Jason. I think he is the one for me.”

The words seemed just not to fit his little sister. Bill just could not think of her as growing up. Crap, he did not even have a girlfriend. That thought depressed him for a moment. “Is he?” Bill said.

“Is he what?”

“A hippie?”

“Well I guess we’re sort of a new version of hippie. His father is a doctor in L.A. and Jason and his family are all well off. Jason is studying to get into law school, so if that is ‘hippie-ish’, I guess he is.”

“Kind of a modern hippie,” Bill said reflectively.

“No,” Julie said. “Actually, Jason is pretty serious about his career. He doesn’t want to work for some corporation and is not all that interested in getting rich.”

“What does he want to do?”

“He wants to work with poor people. Help them with the law. He’s even talking about going into politics so he can change some things.”

“You love him?” Bill asked in his big-brother tone.

Julie reached over and gave him a slight push. “Yes, I do.” Then she added, “You’ll get to meet him. He’s joining us at Uncle Red’s on Christmas Eve.”

“Oh, I almost forgot about all that,” Bill said as they pulled up to the driveway of their home. As Bill got out and they both raced through the rain which by now was falling steadily, Bill knew he needed a beer.
What a crazy and sad turn of events
, he thought as he opened the door and reentered their home.

The Thompson family rarely talked about serious things. Bill had been taught to suck it up and to above all not to show too much emotion. Bill did not mention the talk with Julie when he got home and shared a beer with his dad. He talked about the cancer with his mother early the next morning but everyone seemed to avoid the subject whenever Milt entered the room. It was as though if everyone ignored it the cancer would just go away.

It was not until the next morning, Christmas Eve morning, that Bill had a chance to bring the subject up with his dad. His dad, excited about the new Buick, invited Bill to come out to the garage and look at the engine and the car more closely.

They looked down at the engine. Milt began explaining about horsepower, torque and so forth. Bill listened politely. He understood some about such things but had never really been interested in cars, to his father’s disappointment.

Finally, about the time his father was pointing to the carburetor, Bill said almost too loudly, “Dad, hold it a minute.” Milt looked up from the engine. “Julie told me about the cancer. Why didn’t you say something?”

“She did what?”

“She told me. I am family, you know.”

Milt could sense his son was upset. “Oh, you know me, son.”

“No, I don’t,” Bill said looking up into his father’s eyes. Bill was five feet eight inches, and his father was six foot two. Bill had always admired his father’s muscled arms, honed from years and years of mechanical work. His protruding belly was both a sign of age and a sign of going out with the boys at Lou’s bar a little too often.

“You know I don’t like all that shit about feelings and such.”

“This is not about sharing your feelings, Dad; this is about you having cancer.”

“Well, it’ll be okay. I’ll have a little surgery next month. They will take the tumor out and it’s just no big deal.”

“Did the doctor say breast cancer, Dad?”

“Yeh, somethin’ like that.” Milt began to again look at the engine. “Rare in men, he said. The doctor, I mean.” For the first time Bill could hear a tremble in his father’s voice.

“Rare?” Bill repeated.

“Yep, wouldn’t you know it but I would get a women’s disease. It is embarrassing. Now don’t you go and blab it all over. I’m just telling people at the shop it is a little surgery for a tumor. No one has to know. Christ, how embarrassing.”

“Dad,” Bill said and then again louder, “Dad!”

“What?”

“I’ll pray for you.” Now, normally when Bill brought up religion, the family changed the subject. It was not that the family was non-religious; they just did not attend church much. They also thought it strange that Bill had decided to go into the ministry. Milt still thought it was a phase that he would get over. He had always dreamed of him and his son opening up an auto repair shop. He had given that dream up when Bill showed absolutely no interest in cars. What was strange was what Milt said next. He looked at Bill and Bill could see a small tear in the corner of one eye. “I would like that, son.”