The Warrior Sheep Go West (12 page)

Boom

The other warriors staggered to their hooves, their heads spinning from their collision with the heat shield. Wills looked round and saw Staple Gun Woman's man standing in front of a great bank of computers.

“Seven…Six…Five…”

Wills didn't know why, but he felt sure that when the counting got down to zero, something very bad would happen.

“Charge!” he cried, and raced away from the heat shield.

He was aiming at the white coats now, and one particular pair of dirty trousers. His head made contact, but on his own he wasn't big enough to knock a grown man over.

“You may be smart sheep,” said the trouser-wearer, with a smug little smile, “but you're too late. It's Boom Day for Boomberg!”

“Two…One…Lift off!”

Beyond the tinted heat shield, the rocket that was Red Tongue was already rising. Flames shot from its tail. The noise was deafening. The sheep cowered away, fearful that their fleeces really would scorch in this hottest of all winds.

Inside the capsule, a different noise was bouncing off the walls. Tod had got out of his harness and released Gran, and between them they'd overpowered Holly and forced her into one of the chairs. She was bellowing angrily.

“Let me go!” she yelled. “And get that smelly creature away from me! It's all his fault!”

Oxo was leaning against her legs, having an exploratory nibble at one of her shoes.

“Not until you tell us where the eject button is!” shouted Gran.

Oxo sat down heavily on Holly's feet and made himself comfortable. This shoe was going to take a bit of concentrated chewing.

“On the wall beside you!” yelled Holly. “The red one! Now get him off my feet!”

Tod spun round, saw a large red button and punched it. Instantly, it began to flash. At the same moment, a sign started to flash on the Professor's bank of computer screens.

ASTRONAUT REQUESTS EJECT. CONFIRM: YES OR NO.

“No way…” breathed the Professor. “No way…” And he leaned over to press the NO button.

Wills wasn't exactly sure about the word “eject,” but he had an idea it had something to do with throwing things out. Ida used to eject the hens from the barn when she wanted to clean it. Maybe he could get Oxo thrown out of Red Tongue's stomach. He bounced lightly on his toes, in a way that only a lamb can do, then sprang onto the computer control desk.

“Get off!” screamed the Professor.

But Wills lowered his head and managed to smack it into the YES button just before the Professor shoved him angrily aside.

The noise and heat of the rocket launching were fading, and as the tinted heat shield gradually sank back into the floor, the white coats hurried from their computers.

With a snarl at Wills, the Professor followed them. They all peered upward, shading their eyes, through the open dome of the cavern. The warriors followed.

“I'm sorry,” said Wills miserably. “I thought that might work…I thought that might save Oxo.”

Sal gave him a little lick. “Red Tongue's eaten Oxo, dear,” she said. “We can't get him back.”

The rocket was still rising steadily. It glinted in the blue sky; its heat trail was now a distant flicker. The white coats jumped up and down and cheered. They queued up to shake the Professor's hand. He looked relieved. He looked elated.

Then suddenly, as the sheep stared, they saw Red Tongue's head fall off. The whole head separated from the body and began to float back to earth under what Wills hastily told them was a parachute. The white coats had seen it too. They stopped cheering. A deadly hush fell over the launch site. Everyone's eyes were fixed.

Then it happened. The rest of the rocket turned sharply sideways. It zigzagged wildly across the cloudless blue sky before spiraling downward to earth. The warriors all felt the impact as Red Tongue, minus its head, crashed with an almighty explosion somewhere out in the desert.

Professor Boomberg finally broke the stunned silence.

“Open the gate,” he ordered in a flat voice.

As the white coats scurried off, he looked down at the sheep for a moment or two and shook his head.

“If only I'd insisted on rats…” he murmured.

The warriors stood in shocked silence until the humans had gone. Then Links spoke.

“Red Tongue's finished, guys,” he said. “Butted right out of sheepdom.”

“Ohmygrass,” said Jaycey. “Wediditwediditwedidit…”

“The Songs of the Fleece are never wrong!” cried Sal.

They quickly trotted after the Professor, through the great man-made cavern and out of a sliding steel door that had opened in the hillside. The smoking ruins of Red Tongue's body lay in the distance. But much closer, and still floating gently down beneath its parachute, was the evil dog's head.

As the capsule hit the ground, Holly's seat jolted forward and smashed into Oxo, who was still sitting on her feet, chewing a nicely softened shoe. His head cracked against the capsule wall. Then Holly's harness sprang open. So did the door. Holly scrambled to her feet, leaving her shoes behind. She trod on Oxo's limp body and, barging past Tod and Gran, leapt out of the capsule—straight into a patch of very prickly pears. She hopped away on her bare feet, pushing aside the warriors as they plowed past in the opposite direction.

Links scrabbled up into the capsule and the others squeezed in behind him. Tod and Ida were standing there, gazing down at Oxo. His eyes were shut and he lay perfectly still. The sheep gave Tod and Ida a nod as they edged through to their fallen friend.

It was as the sheep had expected. Links poked Oxo with his nose.

“He's dead, eh,” he announced.

Sal choked back her tears.

“He was a warrior,” she sobbed. “An example to us all. A sheep among sheep…”

“Ohmygrass…” wailed Jaycey. “I shall miss him sooooo much.”

Wills nodded sadly. “He was a brave guy. He deserves a medal.”

“What's one of them?” asked Oxo, opening one eye. “Can you eat it?”

***

Outside the capsule, the police and the fire service were arriving. In fact, a whole line of official vehicles was bouncing importantly across the desert with sirens blaring.

Sheriff Tiny had been in the first police car but was on horseback now. He'd seen Lightning wandering out of the hillside and baled out to fetch him. Then he'd spotted the woman who'd stolen Lightning, hopping away through the prickly pears. He swung his lasso and it dropped and tightened around her shoulders in a very satisfying way.

“Just a few questions, ma'am, if you don't mind,” called Tiny, reeling her in. “I never did catch your name.”

The woman straightened up and regarded him defiantly.

“I am Holly Boomberg,” she declared, “and my middle name is Petunia.”

She turned and pointed at the skinny, pale-faced man who was attempting to creep back into the hillside.

“And
that
is my husband, Professor Stanley Boomberg. The
worst scientist
in the universe!”

Sheriff Tiny felt a tug on his boot. The little old lady who'd broken out of Gunslinger City jail was standing beside his horse.

“I did tell you,” she said. “He's Rhubarb. And those”—she pointed proudly at five sheep standing just outside the capsule—“are the Eppingham rare breeds.”

The Final Rap

The town of Aries End had a proper airport, with departure screens and marble floors and a VIP lounge. Sheriff Tiny made sure the entire Eppingham posse, as he smilingly called them, got to use the lounge when he saw them off next day. He even arranged a tray of cabbage leaves just for the sheep. And he gave Ida back her bag, which she'd left behind during the jail break. Gunslinger City was now full of Boombergs and white coats awaiting trial on a charge of sheepnapping and exploding a space rocket in a public place.

Ida prized the silver stud from Sal's ear and dusted the remains of the glitter from Jaycey's fleece.

“There…” she said, patting them both. “Good girls.”

It still seemed remarkable to Wills that Tod and Ida had come all this way to help. Perhaps there was something about it in the Songs of the Fleece. As he pondered, he was distracted by a familiar chant in the Departures Hall.

“Aries, Aries…Rams, Ewes, and Lambs!”

“Listen, guys,” said Wills. “That sounds like Phoenix and Cameron.”

The chanting came closer and, trotting out into the Hall, the sheep saw a crowd of people wearing black-and-white T-shirts and waving flags. On every flag was a picture of a ram's head.

“It
is
them,” said Links. “Look, right in the middle of that lot.”

At that moment, Cameron spotted the sheep.

“Hey, Phee! Look! Our sheep! Mom, Mom, come and check this out! Our sheep! The guys who saved our stupid hides out in the desert!”

Tod and Ida didn't want the flock out of their sight for a moment and hurried anxiously after them. They were astonished to see two teenage boys on their knees with their arms around Oxo and Sal, and a crowd of others stroking and patting the whole flock.

“Thank you, thank you…” cried the woman who was evidently Mom, kissing each of the sheep in turn. “Cameron, Phoenix, stay there; I have to take a team picture!”

The boys did as they were told, crouching beside the sheep, while Mom got out her camera.

“We finally beat Red Tongue, guys,” said Cameron.

“Whupped 'em out of sight here, at Aries End, just yesterday!” said Phoenix, punching the air.

“What they sayin'?” asked Links.

“They know that Red Tongue got whupped,” said Wills.

He raised a hoof and so did the other warriors, and Phoenix and Cameron gave them high fives all round.

Mom and the rest of the football fans cheered. And Tod and Ida just stared.

BING BONG…a loudspeaker message filled the Hall.

“Will all passengers for London Gatwick please proceed to Gate Five, where Flight RBW One is ready for boarding.”

“Time to go,” translated Wills.

“Better say good-bye then, man,” said Links, and he shook his floppy curls and tapped a hoof as the Warrior Sheep got into line beside him.

“Some humans think us sheep ain't bright

But it seems you guys have seen the light.

And though we never came lookin' for fame,

It's cool that you'll remember our name.

The Songs of the Fleece told us what to do,

And we had a little help from some humans too.

So now ole Red Tongue won't slaughter no more,

'Cause the Warrior Sheep has blown him out the door!”

They were rapping toward the Departure Gate now.

The crowd loved the noise. “More, more!” they shouted, walking with the sheep.

“We'd love to visit the desert again,

But now it's time for some Eppingham rain.

We had a ball in the US of A,

So good-bye, folks. And have a nice day!”

When Sal the sheep is bonked on the head by an unidentified falling object, it can only mean one thing: Lord Aries, the Sheep of all Sheepdom, is in trouble, and the sheep posse must save him.

Little do the sheep know that the mysterious object is actually a cell phone dropped by a couple of baaaaad bank robbers who will do anything to get it back. And a couple of woolbags aren't going to stand in their way!

Christopher Russell was a postman when he had his first radio play broadcast in 1975, having given up a job in the civil service to do shift work and have more daytime hours for writing. Since 1980, he has been a full-time television and radio scriptwriter, and, more recently, a children's novelist. His wife, Christine, has always been closely involved with his work, storylining and script editing, and has television credits of her own.

The Quest of the Warrior Sheep
was the first book they wrote together.