“You’re probably wondering why I shared this with you.”
Rainee nodded.
Katherine laid her hand on top of Rainee’s. “You might be young enough to be my daughter, but we share a common bond.”
Rainee could not imagine what that was.
“I can never go home again either.”
Rainee blinked. “What—what do you mean you can never go home again?” All sorts of scenarios ran through Rainee’s mind. But rather than let her thoughts run wild, she patiently waited for Katherine’s answer.
Katherine took a long sip of her tea, then set the cup on the table. “At seventeen, I ran away from home and eloped with Haydon’s father.”
Rainee’s mouth formed a wide O.
“My father was a very abusive man, Rainee. Not just physically but mentally as well.”
Her heart went out to Katherine. For she knew only too well the cruelty of abuse.
She clasped the woman’s hands and cradled them with her own. She wished she could remove her lacy gloves, but she feared someone other than Leah and Katherine would see her scars, so she kept them on.
“To everyone else Father appeared to be a loving husband and father. But to my sisters, my mother and me, he was evil personified. We all have the scars to prove it.”
“You have scars, too?” Rainee blurted without thinking. She wanted to scan Katherine’s arms, neck and any other skin showing, but she forced her eyes to remain on Katherine so as to not make her uncomfortable.
“Yes, I do.”
Rainee wanted to ask where, but she did not, and Katherine did not offer the information.
“Before my father had a chance to follow through with his plan, Sylva, my personal maid, came to us in the middle of the night to tell us she had overheard my father talking to some man in his study. I knew my father was a vicious man, but I never knew the true depth of his maliciousness until that night.” She looked at Rainee, then her gaze dropped to her lap. “Father had hired a man to kill my soon-to-be husband and to make it look like an accident.”
Rainee tried to stifle a gasp but failed. She squeezed Katherine’s hand, and Katherine returned the gesture, holding on so tight Rainee’s hand began to tingle.
“He wanted my husband dead so he could take back control of my life. My father was foolish enough to
believe I would let him have control of not only my life again, but all my husband’s assets as well. That same night we fled to New York. Years later, we moved out here, and I haven’t seen any of my family since.”
Now it all made sense why God had led her to this particular place and why Katherine had been so kind to her from the very beginning. Katherine understood exactly how she felt.
Rainee hoped and prayed she would never have to leave Haydon or this wonderful family she had grown extremely fond of.
But how could she stay when she needed to get married? Getting married was her ticket out from under Ferrin’s care, and Haydon’s intentions on that account were confusing at best.
Then she remembered Haydon’s kiss. Did his sweet kiss mean he had feelings for her? Hope peaked into her soul, making it soar as high as the night stars.
H
aydon scrambled to the barn, saddled Rebel and raced into the woods. When he reached the river, he dismounted and lowered himself onto a large boulder near the water.
The full moon threaded silver-and-black ripples over the riverbed rocks, and the trees cast their lots over him.
He closed his eyes and allowed the lulling sound of the water to calm his racing heart. How could one barnraising kiss have such a powerful effect on him? It was wrong of him to kiss her, but when she closed her eyes, it was as if his lips were drawn toward hers beyond all reasoning.
Chills spread through his whole body when their mouths had connected. “Lord, I didn’t want to have feelings for her, but I do. Now what?”
What had he been thinking by inviting her to see the ranch, knowing that against his will his affection toward her had already been escalating? He couldn’t help but notice her actions over the past few weeks.
Couldn’t help but notice
her.
Her kindness, her willingness to help do anything,
her beauty inside and out and the feisty spirit she displayed so often had knocked a gaping hole in the wall he had built around his heart.
And he didn’t want that wall to crumble.
His heart yanked him in several directions.
“Lord, I don’t want to love anyone. It hurts too bad. I can’t bear the idea of failing again or hurting another human being, including myself. Once was devastating enough. I’m so confused.”
Fear wrapped around his heart and squeezed until he could hardly breathe. “I can’t handle this. Being with her is out of the question.”
“You betcha it is!”
Haydon whirled toward the sound of the voice. His leg slipped on the slick rock. Pain shot through his hands and knees as they collided with the hard ground. He scrambled to stand but froze when the cold barrel of a gun pressed against his right temple.
“Stay right where you are.”
That voice. He had heard it somewhere before. From the corner of his eye, he spotted a worn-out boot. If he spun just right, he could knock the man’s leg out from underneath him and grab his gun.
The gun cocked.
Haydon froze. He didn’t dare move.
While Rainee finished up the morning dishes, she gazed out the kitchen window above the sink, wondering again why Haydon had not come to breakfast.
Michael waved at her from the wagon as he and Smokey wheeled by the house, heading toward town. She raised her wet hand and wiggled her fingers in a wave. Water ran down her arm. She plunged her hands back into the dishwater and glanced out the window
again, hoping to get a glimpse of Haydon. She scanned the yard, and her gaze stopped at Jesse’s house. Jesse was standing on his porch, with his arms wrapped around Hannah, kissing her. Rainee knew she should look away, but the sweet, tender sight mesmerized her. Envy wrapped around her like a choking vine.
“Well, I’m off to Nora’s,” Katherine said from behind her.
Rainee whirled with a jump.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m leaving now. Today’s the day I will meet Mr. Svenska.” Katherine’s eyes sparkled.
“Who is Mr. Svenska?” Rainee dried her bare hands on a towel.
“Nora’s brother.”
“Oh. And pray tell, how old is this Mr. Svenska?”
“Fifty-three.” A knowing smile passed between them before Katherine hugged her.
“Have fun.”
“Oh, I will. You, too.” Katherine turned and gathered the gift basket she had prepared for Nora from off the kitchen table.
Leah strode into the room and pulled Rainee into a quick hug. It felt good to be hugged by those she cared about. “Seems like we don’t ever get to talk much anymore. I’m either at my friends’ quilting or helping Mrs. Bengtsson with her twins. They’re sure cute. I’m going to hate it when Mrs. Bengtsson gets better and doesn’t need me anymore.”
“Leah!”
They both jerked their heads that way.
Leah giggled. “I see how that must have sounded, Mother, but that’s not what I meant. Of course, I want her to get well, but I just meant I will miss the twins.”
The wrinkles around Katherine’s eyes relaxed and she nodded in understanding.
“I’ll see you later, Rainee.” Leah and Rainee smiled at each other before Leah picked up her bundle from off of the table and headed out the door.
Abby darted into the kitchen from outside and barreled into Rainee’s leg, knocking her into the sink. Her tiny arms flew around Rainee’s hips.
“Abigail!” Katherine shook her head and Abby’s wide-eyed gaze darted toward her mother. “I really did raise my children better than this, honest. Sorry, Rainee.”
“Do not be sorry, Katherine. You did a fine job of raising your children.”
Especially a certain handsome man.
Abby sent Katherine a smile that said, “See there is nothing wrong with me,” then she looked up at Rainee. “See ya later, Rainee. I love you.”
Rainee’s heart melted. This sweet little girl, who Rainee adored, loved her. “I love you too, Abby.” She leaned down and pulled Abby into her arms, careful to keep her scarred hands hidden. When everyone except Katherine and Leah had left the house that morning, Rainee had taken a chance and removed her gloves and laid them next to the sink. She eyed them now, wishing she had them on.
Abby gave her another hard squeeze around the neck and skipped outdoors again before Rainee finished standing.
Katherine studied her. “You sure you don’t want to go with us?”
“I am sure. But thank you for asking.”
“Oh, and don’t worry about Haydon not showing up
for breakfast. With him not working yesterday, he said he had a lot of chores to catch up on.”
Rainee nodded even though Katherine’s words did nothing to reassure her.
“A lot of times Haydon gets up early and, after he finishes his chores, he’ll go for a long ride. Especially if he has a lot on his mind.” Katherine sent her a knowing glance. “I’m praying things work out between you and Haydon. After that kiss last night, I’d say it’s only a matter of time.” With a wink, Katherine flew out the door, chuckling all the way.
Rainee stared after Haydon’s mother. If she did not close her mouth soon, a fly would surely land inside it. Rainee clamped her lips together.
She watched as Katherine, Leah and Abby squashed themselves into the buggy to go visit their neighbors as they had done a couple times since she had been there. Rainee thought it sweet of them to invite her along, but she did not feel up to being very social today because she could not shake the uneasiness dwelling inside her. Haydon not showing up for breakfast snatched any hopes she had of staying here.
Had he regretted kissing her?
And had his regret kept him away?
Katherine believed things would work out between them. But she surely must be mistaken.
With a weighty sigh and a heavy heart, Rainee washed the last pan, dried all the dishes and put them away, and tidied up the rest of the kitchen. She stood back and surveyed her work. Seeing the kitchen sparkling clean was so rewarding. She removed her apron and hung it on the hook by the door.
The warm sunshine beckoned her. A walk would do her good and give her a chance to pray.
In case Haydon showed up and wondered where she was, she grabbed Abby’s slate and a piece of chalk and scribbled a note indicating she was going for a walk. She tugged her gloves on, placed apples, biscuits, leftover bacon, and a canteen of sweetened tea in a sack and headed outside.
“Good morning, Rainee,” Hannah hollered and waved.
She did not feel like talking to anyone, but she would not be rude to her dear friend either, so she walked over to Hannah’s house. “Good morning, Hannah.” She looked around the area. “Where is Jesse?”
“He’s doing his morning chores and Haydon’s, too. I sure worry about him sometimes. I know he’s doing better and you can’t keep a man down, but I sure wish he would have given himself more time to heal. But no, within three days he was outside working again. Of course, I forbid him to do a lot of heavy work. But he never listens to me. You know how men are.”
She sure did know how men were. “Wait. Did you say that Jesse was doing
Haydon’s
chores?”
“Yes. Why?”
So, Haydon did not stay away from breakfast because of chores. That unsettled feeling she had earlier escalated. She needed someone to talk to about her concerns. A friend she could confide in. And Hannah had turned out to be that person. “Do you mind if I sit down?”
“No, of course not. Would you like some tea?”
“No, thank you.” She lowered herself onto the swing, stabilized the food sack on her lap and turned her face toward Hannah.
“What’s wrong, Rainee?”
Rainee looked around to make sure they were alone.
Of course they were alone. Everyone had gone except Jesse, and he was away doing chores. “Please keep this between us, okay?”
Hannah nodded. Fine strands of red hair outlined her face, and her brown eyes studied Rainee, waiting.
“Yesterday Haydon and I went for a ride.”
“Yes, I know.”
“You do?”
Hannah giggled. “I saw you two ride out together.”
Rainee smiled. Nothing got past Hannah. She placed her hands on top of the food sack and pulled and tugged at the palm of her lacy glove as she relayed everything that had happened up until the kiss. “And then he kissed me.”
“He kissed you?” Hannah’s eyes lit up. “Oh, Rainee, I’m so happy for you.”
“I would be happy for me too, if after he had kissed me he had not apologized and run off. I have not seen the man since.”
“Rainee.” Hannah took her hands into hers. “Trust me when I say that Haydon has feelings for you, but he’s scared. I can’t say anything more than that. It’s not my place. But things will work out. Have faith.”
It was faith that had brought her to this strange land to marry a perfect stranger. And it was faith that had kept her alive. Hannah was right. She needed to have faith that God would work everything out. No wonder the Bible said to encourage one another daily. Even though she knew God would work things out according to His perfect will and His timing, she still needed to be reminded of it on a daily basis.
“Rainee. Haydon has only kissed two women in his life. And you’re one of them. The other—” Hannah stopped and tucked her bottom lip with her teeth.
The other he married, Rainee mentally finished Hannah’s sentence for her. She could only dream that he would marry her, too. Their shared kiss had scarce given her hope that perhaps there might be a future for them after all. Time would tell.
“I’ve said enough already.” Hannah let go of Rainee’s hands.
Although she was disappointed Hannah had not continued, she felt a measure of relief at Hannah’s revelation. That alone reignited the spark of hope she had yesterday. And she could not very well ask Hannah to say more. After all, Hannah was not aware that Rainee knew about Melanie. Katherine had told her about Haydon’s wife in the strictest of confidence, and Rainee would not break her word. “Thank you, Hannah.”
“You’re welcome.” A smile of understanding passed between them.
Rainee clutched the sack of food and stood. “I need to go for a walk, to think and to pray. Please, do not get up. I will talk to you later.” She headed down the porch steps and turned to wave at Hannah.
Unable to shake the nagging feeling that something was wrong with Haydon, she headed toward the barn to see if he was there. Instead, she found Jesse.
“Good morning.”
Jesse turned and a hint of a smile wafted through his eyes. “Morning.” He went back to scooping the hay.
“Have you seen Haydon?”
“Um. No. I haven’t.”
Rainee stared at Jesse for a long moment, sensing something was not quite right. “All right. If you do see him, would you please tell him I am looking for him?”
“Okay.”
She turned and had almost reached the outer sunshine when his voice stopped her.
“Rainee.”
When she turned, she knew it was serious. He came toward her, head down, boots sliding on the dusty barn floor. Stopping only two feet from her, he removed a crumpled envelope from his pocket and held it out to her.
“I should have given this to you when I picked it up last week.” His gaze was only on the letter and never lifted to hers. “I’m sorry.”
His hand came up, offering the envelope to her.
Rainee stared at it, perplexed as to its meaning. Then she glimpsed the name on it. Bettes. Her breath caught. With shaking fingers, she took it from him. “Thank you, Jesse.”
He nodded. “I better get back to work.”
Taking the letter that could change her life, she walked out and into the grassland covered with those beautiful purple flowers Haydon called camas plants.
She should look at it. Yet she could not bring herself to. What did she want it to say? If Mr. Bettes was sending for her, she could easily be gone from here tomorrow. Rainee followed along the edge of the field near the tree line. Seeing the pigs grazing in the distance, her pulse quickened but she kept her wits about her. She increased her pace, keeping her eyes on the swine, hoping and praying that Kitty or any of the other pigs would not spot her and follow her. She may have petted Kitty, but she still was not over her fear.
She spotted the trail Haydon had shown her and tucked the letter into her pocket. It could wait. She headed up into the trees until she reached the Palouse River. Along the way, Rainee stopped to sniff the white
blooms on several of the syringa bushes. A divine citrus smell tickled her nose. She watched and listened to the bees buzzing around the flowers, fascinated that they enjoyed the flowers as much as she did.
Rainee followed the riverbank. Water lapped over the smooth rocks on the bottom of the river, and sunlight glinted off the small caps of the water, glimmering like diamonds. She smiled. How could she be so fortunate as to have come to such a beautiful country? And could she now leave it behind if God beckoned her forth from it?
Ahead she saw a thick grove of trees and brush, and for a moment, she wondered how far she had come. Was she even on the Bowen’s property anymore? She panned the area in search of something familiar. She smiled when she found it. Twigs snapped under her feet as she hurried toward the special place she and Haydon had shared the picnic together.